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1. After any minor day-to-day event, you begin composing your Hatrack post about it.
2. That team of experts who have taught you everything? Well, as far as you know, their names really are Mack, Icarus, and Papa Moose.
3. Three or more Jatraqueros have featured in a single dream of yours.
4. Turns out all three Jatraqueros were just the screen names of one landmark-dodger.
5. It's a recurring dream.
6. The name you're posting under now was created to avoid your landmark.
7. And you're coming close to a landmark with that name too.
8. If you've ever, ever been to a Hatrack convention.
9. If, when asked to list your best friends, Hatrack screen names (note screen names, not real ones) appear in the top 3.
10. If you've told a long, convoluted anecdote about a dobie chain to a coworker and tried to ward off the odd looks with a nonchalant "It's an online book club. Cross my heart."
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13. Which is why you must now sell the last of your stolen office supplies for Internet access.
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Why, thank you Trish. I'm actually older than that even but I resisted signing up for the "new forum" for a couple months out of sadness for the loss of the old one.
I took a 3 1/2 year hiatus, though, when I didn't have a computer, so I'm not a total oldbie.
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16. Your home network bootstraps itself into an AI just to have an intervention with you after you click "reload" 13,000 times on "Today's Active Topics"
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17. You're about to tell your wife about a conversation you were having that day, and then you remember that it was a Hatrack thread and you were just lurking in it.
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21. You keep starting more of them because, hey, you don't have anything else going on in your life, anyway.
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22. You're disappointed in your kid because it's been ages since she said anything cute, so you make stuff up for the cute kids threads.
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When it is past 2 am, and you are still up posting...not because you really have anything to say but because if you go to bed you might miss something on Hatrack....
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#?: You have a teacher named Rivka, and you cannot, for the life of you, write her name with a capital "R" on the first try. (Yes, this happened to me last semester!)
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quote: 17. You're about to tell your wife about a conversation you were having that day, and then you remember that it was a Hatrack thread and you were just lurking in it.
Guilty --except the wife part!!
edit: hey that's 200 posts!!Does that count as a landmark???
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26. You sign out of Hatrack because you have been on for a while, but before you leave the computer, you sign back on because someone must have posted something in those two seconds.
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quote: 26. You sign out of Hatrack because you have been on for a while, but before you leave the computer, you sign back on because someone must have posted something in those two seconds.
It's more like, you know you've had too much hatrack when you accidentally hit "log out" instead of a link, try to log back in, can't remember your password or the email you used to originally sign up, have to register a new account, use the new name, and have everyone assume you are avoiding a landmark.
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My husband reminded me I needed to post this one:
28. You are half asleep, in bed, talking to your spouse, and say something abhorrent, followed not only by a little shudder, but the word *shudder*. Including thinking the little *s that denote action.
My husband looked at me and said, "Did you just say 'shudder'?" at the same time I realized I'd said it out loud.
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29. You're teaching the Sunday School lesson at church and, as an example you say "I was having this conversation with some friends of mine..." and your roommate wryly interjects - "Was this an actual conversation or did it happen on an internet bulletin board?"
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I, uh, do that all the time: "My friends and I were talking about this the other day. Someone said..." (The "someone" is because people would look at me strangely if I said their screennames.)
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quote: When someone says something amusing, you say LOL. The actual letters L.O.L. out loud.
The only problem is, when I read those letters, I actually pronounce them out. I can't seem to remember it's 3 seperate letters and not "lol". Now THAT would be embarrassing if you said that.
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30. You laugh out loud and your roommate calls from the other room, "What's going on with your science fiction website today?"
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That, or you mention to your roommate "one of my friends said..." and she says "oh, is this one of your little online group?"
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