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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Phantom of the Opera in 15 Minutes

   
Author Topic: Phantom of the Opera in 15 Minutes
ReikoDemosthenes
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A friend of mine directed me to this and it amused me, so I now share it with you.
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ketchupqueen
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quote:
HE’S SLIGHTLY UNATTRACTIVE ON ONE SIDE! TO ARMS!
[ROFL]
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Damander
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[ROFL]
That was great.

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Talison
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*dies laughing* [Laugh]
"AUGH! THAT WAS MY PREENING ARM!"

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Bob_Scopatz
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Brilliant
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Vadon
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quote:
THE PHANTOM: Wear this ring and be mine FOREVER.

CHRISTINE: Wait, isn’t this Raoul’s ring?

THE PHANTOM: Well… yes.

CHRISTINE: So... who does that engage me to, exactly…?

THE PHANTOM: Well… it engages you to… wait…

CHRISTINE: YOINK!

I liked that part... so much for some reason.
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Olivetta
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I must print this for my mother-in-law. She asked for this movie as her Mother's Day present. Said it was the best movie she'd seen all year.

*shudder*

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Vadon
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I'll admit, I thought that too, that is, until my mother graciously bought me the original soundtrack where Michael Crawford plays the phantom. Let me put it this way, I almost want to ram giant stakes made of hot iron in my ears when I hear Gerard Butler sing now.

Eh, this soundtrack has been a blessing and a curse, though, I do love it. (I'm listening to it now, in fact.)

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ReikoDemosthenes
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I am still endlessly amused that Colm Wilkinson, the fellow who plays the phantom in the original Canadian cast recording, also plays Jean Valjean in a recording of Les Mis...
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Carrie
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The other parodies on the site are equally entertaining - specifically Troy and Prisoner of Azkaban.
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Eruve Nandiriel
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As much as I loved the movie, that was really funny.

"The Flying Nun"
[ROFL]

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A Rat Named Dog
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I'm glad SOMEone else noticed Madame Giry's bizarre accent ...
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Lyrhawn
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Reminds me of a girl (Evadne) who used to write what she called "Breadbox Editions" of movies on Fanfiction.net. Those were just as hilarious.

Good stuff.

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Raia
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[ROFL]
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Puffy Treat
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The "King Arthur" one had me helpless with laughter.
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sarcasticmuppet
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quote:
THE PHANTOM: I sing of seduction and surrender in a completely non-metaphorical way!

CHRISTINE: I kind of dig this.
© 2005 Cleolinda Jones. All rights reserved. cleo linda.livejournal.com
THE DREAD PIRATE ROBERTS CORPS DE BALLET: *shimmies*

THE PHANTOM: I sing of really unsubtle metaphors about flames and racing blood and opening buds!

CHRISTINE: Ooo, tell me more.

THE DREAD PIRATE ROBERTS DEATH DANCE TROUPE: *bunny hops*

THE PHANTOM: BE MINE FOREVER AND I WILL CONSUME YOU IN A COMPLETELY NON-FIGURATIVE WAY UNTIL THE BREAK OF DAWN!

[Christine deploys her collapsible bodice, leaving her shoulders completely bare.]

RAOUL: *cries*

THE DREAD PIRATE ROBERTS PEP SQUAD: *frugs*

I was planning to track this down now that my mom's seen it on DVD. *loves hatrack*
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Ele
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Funny, funny!

Won't see it, folks. Boycotting because ALW didn't let Michael Crawford be the Phantom in the movie. Or rather, that's not really true. I just don't want to see it...or hear it rather...

It's all about the voice in this one, Webber: Crawford *is* the Angel of Music. This guy Gerard is a frog by comparison. And I don't care what he looks like on either side. [Wink]

Knowing the voice of an angel when she hears it,

~Ele

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Vadon
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Heh, what I'm considering doing is that if we get the DVD, I'll mute it when Gerard Butler is supposed to sing and just play the soundtrack during those times. That might work for me. ^_^
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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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I love this script.
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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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Crap. Its been blocked now, can anyone post it here please?
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Kayla
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quote:
Heh, what I'm considering doing is that if we get the DVD,
Oh, save yourself the money. Read OSC's review of it. He was being nice. I wanted to shoot myself in the head. And I love musicals. Who, in God's name, hires actors for musicals? It would have been like hiring an actors for The Turning Point! Can you imagine?

And their phantom didn't even have the vocal range to hit the low notes!

But, I did appreciate the girl. She was too young for this role, (well, she was fine, but her voice was too young) but since I saw her first in The Day After Tomorrow first, it was nice to be surprised by her.

Alt, is it still down for you? Cause it worked fine for me.

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Lupus
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I really thought the girl who played Christine did a weaker job than the phantom.

I thought he did an OK job. He wasn't really up to the role, but for a movie version of a musical he wasn't that bad.

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Kayla
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Well, I had seen her in a movie and didn't know she could carry a tune. So, I was surprised. She has a nice voice, but she's young musically and it showed.

Plus, the girl is supposed to be a student, so some of her inadequacies could be chalked up to that. But the Phantom? He is supposed to be the master of the music. And he's mostly hoarse and apparently, Scottish! What was with that bizarre accent?

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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I think he was hot.

Oh, its not that its down for me, its that the school's filter blocked it and I can no longer see it.

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Vadon
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Already seen it, twice.

Once before I got the soundtrack to the Broadway version with Michael Crawford, once afterwards. I agree, OSC was nice when he reviewed it.

Though, I wouldn't mind the DVD the only thing that really does get to me is the Phantom's singing... and that Christine only has about two face expressions in the movie...

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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^.~
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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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Oh. My request is still on. I need someone to post it so that I can read it because my school's filter blocked it.
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ReikoDemosthenes
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I'm not sure if I could ever watch or listen to Phantom of the Opera with a straight face with Cornelius Hackle of Hello, Dolly playing the phantom...
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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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Ha ha. I don't think he'd make a good phantom unless the movie was a comedy...
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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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CRAP! I still can't get it. Can't anyone post this please?
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sarcasticmuppet
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I think there are copyright rules against that. The author specifically asked to only forward parts, not the whole thing.

Sorry. [Frown]

I thought the actress had nowhere near the ability to do Christine--her voice was immature and airy a lot. But she looked like the enjeanau (sp???) that Christine needed to be, so in that regard she was much better than someone like Sarah Brightman, who could handle Christine's songs but could not pass as a young girl except from fifty yards away in a stage setting.

I was disscussing this with a film buff friend of mine and he was of the opinion that because film is such a look-based medium, the closeups of the actress playing Christine were a bigger priority than actual singing talent.

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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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They should've dubbed her then.

Oh, I'll only borrow it for like 5 mins. you can delete the post after that so that there is no real CR infringement.

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sarcasticmuppet
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Is your email address current?
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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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yeah. You could sent it thorugh email too.
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Altáriël of Dorthonion
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go it. THX.
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