I have a friend whose parents gave her two middle names, and when she married she added her husband's last name to hers (no hyphen) so now she has five initials.
I now have just about every pre-labor sign in the book -- of course all the book(s) have to say about any of them is "this probably means your labor will be starting in a few days to a few weeks." Yeah, that's helpful. Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002
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I like Coramai (assuming I am pronouncing it right), though I like Shiori better. I think I would do Shiori Ume as two names in the tradition of Mary Ellen, Mary Ann, etc (where the two names are really the first name). And then give an English middle name.
I had all the prelabor signs starting at 36 weeks. I induced at 40. Posts: 2223 | Registered: Mar 2008
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I didn't really have any "pre-labor" the first time around. John came at 38 weeks, labor started overnight and by the time I was awake enough to realize what was happening it was obviously labor.
So this "is it or isn't it" feeling is new to me. I liked it the other way better. Plus the fact that this time it's complicated by needing to have someone watch John once it's time to go to the hospital. It's like I'm constantly on edge "do we need to call someone now?!?" I didn't have much timing worry last time -- the hospital is 6 blocks away so I could pretty much wait until I felt the urge to push and still get there in time. Having to schedule a babysitter to arrive is messing with my laid-back attitude.
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I totally hear ya, dkw. I had four (kind of five) people lined up to watch Lego when I went into labor just in case I called several and no one was home. It's very nerve-racking.
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Not to mention that the pressure to really be in labor, once you're prepared for it (babysitters, etc.) can stop labor.
BTDT! I bow to the pressure and I've always ended up going in at a 4 and then getting induced.
I may go with more than one middle name.
I like Ananda, and have done so ever since reading A Swiftly Tilting Planet as a kid.
Bronwen is pronounced like Brawn-when, or, since "w" is pronounced "oo" in Welsh, Brahn-oo-en.
I think it's pretty easy, and have found that other people who grew up reading fantasy (The Dark Is Rising, LotR, and so on) are okay with it.
It's just some people, like people at the pharmacy, who stumble over it.
Sometimes people think she is a boy, especially because most Americans seem to prefer the -wyn suffix to names, which technically is a male suffix.
And since there's the trend of giving girls surname names, and of surname names being 2 syllables and ending in a -en sound....it doesn't stand out as much now as when we gave it to her 6 years ago.
I'm not sure what to do about the Shiori/Ume thing.
The extra middle name thing will help relieve the pressure; I may just have to have extra daughters. Or maybe a big tank of goldfish.
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Bronwen is a very traditional name, I've known at least ten in my life (of various spellings)-- personally known, that is. I've always liked it. Ananda is not to my taste, but that may be because I knew a quite wacko girl named that (she had changed her name from Amanda when she turned 18...)
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I like Shiori Ume as two names (or one combined but with the space, like Mary Lou). I think smooshing them together would make it harder to notice the beauty of each of them.
I also have lots of people on my very complicated babysitting list -- people who work during the day but are available in the evenings, people who I'd feel comfortable calling at 8am but not at 2am, people who I'd be happy to call at 2am but who live 20 minutes away, someone who lives a few blocks away and is available all day but really isn't my first choice . . . once things really get moving it's going to be some kind of weird game to try to guess how long we'll stay home so we can decide who to call (last time we got to the hospital right before transition, and I'd like to time it that way again, if possible).
Eh, if baby waits until this weekend Mom will be here and we won't have to worry about it.
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Of course, I loved Charlotte for a long time, until on the wall during a WIC appointment, I saw a picture with CHARLOTTE scrawled across the bottom of it. That was it for that name; it was taken and I wasn't going to have anything further to do with it.
My Australian friends say it's (Bronwen) pretty common there. Where are you from, KQ?
I may just give Shiori and Ume to different girls; if I cut down on the other Japanese girl names in the queue, so that I have Shiori, Ume, Megumi and Aozora, then that's only four more daughters. ("only" four, but then I would love a dozen kids.) And then of course Mai, in Coramai; that's Japanese too.
Naming boys is easier. So far, raising them is too, hee.
I seriously dislike having to line up sitters for having a baby, so much sympathy there. It's uncomfortable to ask, and then to have to call at any time of the day or night. I hate "owing" people.
But you sound like you have a good handle on the situation. We weren't able to make that work when we were in the military, so I would wait until my parents visited for the weekend and would desperately try to go into labor while they were there.
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I'm from California. Many of the Bronwens I know are from families either originally from Australia or the UK (particularly Wales and the North of England), sometimes it's a family name or sometimes given after a friend of one of the parents or just a name they liked growing up. One or two are named after characters in books or stories, though. (Isn't Bronwen in the Mabinogi? It's been a while since I read them.)
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Oh, and I have a much easier time naming girls than boys! Always have! (Which I guess is a good thing, since we're at 100% girls so far, and based on family history are likely to have a preponderance of girls...)
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Okay, that explains it. It IS a top ten name in Wales, after all...well, used to be, anyway. Top Ten there NOW is probably all Sophie and Emma and whatnot.
There are Bronwens in Madelaine L'Engle books and in Susan Cooper's Dark Is Rising sequence. My DH and I both read those when we were growing up (at different times; he's older than I am) and both liked it.
It's easier to name girls than boys, in that there are three times more names, and you can use boy's names on girls too, and don't have to worry so much about "Is it TOO weird? Is it feminine enough?"
Whereas with boys, it can be hard to find a name that is masculine, has a pedigree, but isn't overused.
(Unless of course it's not important to you that a name clearly define gender, or not be a made-up name.)
Me, I am really indecisive--at least I think I am ;P--and it's easier setting my parameters and zeroing in on a boy's name that's clearly a boy's name, but top 200 or lower.
Whereas with girl names....sky's the limit!
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I don't tend toward boys' names on girls. Even Jamie, which in most parts of the country is firmly feminized by now, still strikes me as one I absolutely would not use on a girl (even if James was not our number 1 pick for a boy.) And I really don't care about overused; if I like a name, I use it whether it has become popular in the meantime or not. (Witness Emma-- I picked out her name when I was 14, when it was not as popular, and we decided to use it despite the fact that apparently everyone picked that name out as a teenager... If we like a name, we use it and don't care if it's number 1, number 158, or doesn't even make the top 1000 list.)
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Hmmm. I am an automatic snob about that. It's something I'll confront in the next few years, since I really like Lucy for a girl, and that's getting very popular.
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I see it this way; trends come and trends go. I have never been one to be swayed either way by trends, really; just as it doesn't make sense to say that a harvest gold couch is attractive to me because it happens to become "in", it doesn't make sense to decide I don't like bluegrass because it gets popular for a time (remember when O Brother came out? Man, all the wannabes pretending to like bluegrass, which I REALLY DO like, got on my nerves. I didn't mind the people discovering it for the first time and really liking it, but the pretenders irked me.) Trends will pass, but in the end I want to be happy with the choices I make in clothes, furniture, music, and childrens' names for the rest of my life. So I let the trends go by me and listen to the music, buy the furniture and clothing, and name my children the names I like, regardless of what everyone else is or is not doing. Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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That sounds wonderful, and logical, and I admire it.
I tend to be Opposite Girl when it comes to trends, which makes me just as much a trend-follower as anyone else, since I'm following them...but in the negative...it's the ugly truth about being contrarian. *rolls eyes at self*
It kept me from reading Harry Potter until the fourth book came out, because I was sure that anything THAT popular couldn't be any good.
And to be honest, I still think that HP isn't as good as Diana Wynne Jones' books, but they are consumingly enjoyable, and part of the enjoyment is that so many other people like it, too, and it's a very fun path-of-least-resistance to join a ready-made community that knows the book world you're talking about.
I'm not music literate enough to know the trends, so I simply like what I like; and I quilt a lot, so colors are what they are, and are defined on a scale of how they interact instead of how fashionable they are. I make a lot of my own clothes (sounds ghastly, doens't it), which means a lot of long, full skirts and headscarves, regardless of fashion.
I think I disregard fashion more than the people around me would prefer, actually. I once told someone, "I homeschool," and she said, "I figured that." Hee.
But with the names--I range far afield. Lately I've been wandering through some lists from Norwegian colony ship manifests bound for medieval Iceland.
I love really difficult (by American standards) Scandinavian names, and Puritan names, and word names, ones that make most normal non-name saturated people (my husband, for instance) blanche. "You wouldn't really call your kid THAT, would you?!?"
So the more I name, or list names, or otherwise act out in my naming addiction, the more I have to pay attention to popularity trends--I must, if I'm to have any sense of proportion at all.
Otherwise I don't have a sense of "too weird" and it's my children who will suffer. It sounds egotistical, but I think my appetite is such that I can't permit myself to indulge like you can.
example: I think Bluebell, Apple, Gudrun, Godiva and Rapunzel are nice names...and if I had the guts, I'd SO use Hialeah or Prairie or Tallulah for a girl.(afrid of offending Native Americans by hijacking their names) Or Sacagawea; I LOVE Sacagawea. We nearly named my second daughter Halcyon, which I still love. But...not everyone agrees with me, and, like I said, people who don't like unusual baby names are often the same people who are rude enough to tell you AND YOUR CHILD so.
And...maybe I worry too much about what other people are thinking.
After having named 6 kids, a child with a "normal" name would stand out. I can't ruin the momentum.
I admire you using Emma, come hell or high popularity. There's such a trend for "different" names, which I'm obviously slavish about (guess I'm not so different after all). And when my ex-SIL had a baby two months ago, she named her something unthinkable to me: Jennifer. And NO MIDDLE NAME.
But then it struck me that Jennifer, with no middle name, was a more contrarian baby-naming act than what I engage in.
So I suppose that if I REALLY wanted to surprise people, I should name my next daughter Mary. I might as well; Sacagawea is already taken.
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I liked Jamie for a boy, but my husband vetoed it. And then I realized I liked it because of Jamie Lannister!
James was probably my second choice name, kq. (Family name.) Just after Nathaniel was born (and we'd already named him), I was looking at the picture of him my husband put up on the hospital room wall and agonizing because I thought he looked more like a James than a Nathaniel. Fortunately, he looks like a Nathaniel in person.
I liked (still do) James Oliver, which includes two family names, and then I realized...Jamie Oliver...
For a girl, I liked Callie Jane (again, still do) and am SO ANNOYED that Callie is becoming popular because of Grey's Anatomy. Callie Jane is my great-great-grandmother's name, so I HAD IT FIRST! I like your approach about Emma, kq...but I still hate the thought that people might think I named my daughter after a TV character.
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quote:Originally posted by Sachiko: It kept me from reading Harry Potter until the fourth book came out, because I was sure that anything THAT popular couldn't be any good.
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Emma was a name I had picked out in high school and intended to use. It seems lots of people had the same idea. Its off my list now though because not being in the top 20 names is a requirement for me. I still think it is a gorgeous name though.
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I always wanted to use Isabeau, and now draw back because of the doubtless constant "No, not IsaBEL, IsaBEAU" conversations I'd have to have.
I guess I could just go with Dove Isabeau and call her Dove.
Callie Jane is lovely!
When I was in high school I wanted to be original and use Hannah and Abigail.
Isn't it weird how with names, you see how many different people can come to the same conclusion at the same time? It's like we're thinking like a school of fish swims.
I like Greenberry. It has character. But then I like anything a little different, or that connects with ancestors. I've come to love naming my kids after ancestors.
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I used Halcyon as a minor character in a story once. I like weirder names, but my husband likes traditional. I do think that SF and fantasy names should be avoided, since people know we watch a lot of SF. One of my friends named his son Elric and I groaned, esp since the character is not really a good guy. (Silent groan- not nice to actually say that to parents). Of course, I have a weird name that is the same name as a member of the Donnor party. It upsets my mom to no end when I tell people I was named after a cannibal (my mom did not know about the Donnor when she named me).
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quote:I like your approach about Emma, kq...but I still hate the thought that people might think I named my daughter after a TV character.
We had that thought, since the "Friends" baby was named Emma just a year or two before we had our Emma. But I'm lucky-- anyone who knows me at all will believe me when I say, "Nope, I named her after a Kate Wolf song."
(In fact, all our daughters' names have musical connections. It's kinda cool. A theme we weren't fully invested in being a theme but it has worked out, but kind of an "in joke" among our family 'cause most people wouldn't know it.)
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No, that was Iris DeMent. But you'd probably like Kate Wolf, too, I always recommend Kate Wolf to those who like Stan Rogers, though they have totally different voices, and their music is a little different (Stan's music was more Celtic-folk when it wasn't mainstream folk, whereas Kate's was more country/bluegrass-folk when it wasn't mainstream folk), their songs have a similar "feel" to them in that they tell stories, of people, places, events, evoking a sense of history and time I have rarely experienced in others' music.
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It's not that I don't want twins, it's just that I'm so high-risk already that I worry about having 2 more micropreemies. Also, we have 2 sets of twins in my family, so I know firsthand how difficult it is to care for 2 infants at once. Spend some time with someone with twin babies, Sachiko, and you might feel differently. I thought twins would be neat until my cousin Kathy had identical twin boys when I was 16. She would bring them to our house every weekend. By the time they were 6 months old, I had gotten over my twin fixation.
Also, you have twice the hormones when your pregnant with twins, so you'll have twice the symptoms. Though I'm pretty sure I'm having 10 times the symptoms right now. As my OB put it, it's like my body is running 2 marathons a day.
I've actually gotten pregnant with multiples each time I've gotten pregnant. Certainly part of it is the fertility treatments, but it's still pretty rare for a woman to only ever get pregnant with multiples. It's because I'm a multiple egg producer and Andrew is very tall and... (I can't think of a non-vulgar way to put it) has a lot of guys. We're a lethal combination. If I wasn't so bad at being pregnant, these babies would be our sixth and seventh kids (and it's my 3rd pregnancy).
I'm seeing the perinatologist next week and my OB is scheduling my cerclage. She's going to wait about 3-4 weeks.
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I'm regretting my decision to eat an entire bag of popcorn during the 45 minute nausea respite I had this evening. But it was the only thing that appealed to me. Stupid pregnant brain.
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Mrs. M, I hope I didn't sound like I was criticizing you. I wasn't.
You get pregnant with multiples every time? Wow.
I can appreciate not wanting to have to risk micropreemies. I'm high risk for pre term labor myself, and one of my children died soon after birth because of prematurity. So I'm probably pretty stupid for wanting twins at all...I should feel lucky for what I've got.
Have you ever read Managing Morning Sickness? I get pretty pukey with my pregnancies, especially when I carry girls, and that book helped me manage the nausea better.
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I'm so sorry to hear that you lost a child. We've had some pretty devastating miscarriages and we came very close to losing our Aerin, so I got a glimpse into just how unspeakably terrible that is.
You're not stupid at all for wanting twins. I sometimes feel guilty for not wanting them (not that I don't want these specific babies, but I only wanted one baby). There are so many women who go through years of fertility treatments and never get pregnant, who would love to be in my shoes. I also felt pretty stupid for expecting to only see 1 baby on the ultrasound. Then I had to resist the urge to run upstairs and kick my fertility guy in the shins. He is so not getting a picture for his baby wall.
I haven't read that book, but I will now! Flat ginger ale works a little bit and I can usually force down saltines when I'm feeling dizzy from low blood sugar, but that's about it.
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I had one day this pregnancy when I could not stop vomitting -- I woke up at 5am throwing up and it just kept going. I saw the doctor around noon and he said to try 1 tsp of flat ginger ale every 5 minutes.
I have no idea if that advice would be effective, because he also gave me a shot that was very effective. Except it knocked me out, as pretty much all drugs do. But it stopped the vomitting first and I had a glass of 7-up before I fell asleep.
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I had triplets in my 2-3 year old preschool class. They had an older sister too. The pregnancy was completely natural. Needless to say their mom was in shock when she found out it was triplets. The kids were very funny and very sweet. They really looke out for each other. However, I always felt bad for their mom. She always looked miserable and just exhausted. People said it was an improvement from when they were babies. Working with them 9 hours a day cured me of any desire to have a multiple birth. The first thing my husband asked at the original ultrasound was "it's not twins is it?" We were very happy with just our Ellie. I am sure you will love your twins and won't be able to imagine your life without them in no time. Kids seem to have that magical effect on most.
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*nods* I babysat triplets. I had the same experience-- went from "oh, multiples would be so fun" to "I have no desire for multiples, thank you."
Mrs.M, I hope both your babies stay put until they're fully "baked." (((hugs))) You're in my prayers, and the other day Emma even prayed, "take care of Aerin's Mommy's babies in her tummy."
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I know this is crazy, but there are times when I think twins wouldn't be so bad- then I would know for sure I am done and get my tubes tied. We are pretty sure we don't want just one, but right now the idea of the massive pain caused by going off the pill, followed by 40 weeks of pregnancy suffering, recoup time is just too overwhelming for me. When I think that I kinda want two more, the thought of doing it all twice is way, way too much.
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That's why I like the idea--50% more pregnancy for 100% more baby.
It's the Sam's Club style of procreation.
My holdup is postpartum weight issues. I pack it on when I'm nursing and it doesn't start to come off until the last baby is a year old...IF I'm not already pregnant again by then, which I usually am.
(I've been pregnant every calendar year since 1999.)
My husband's best friend has twin girls--so at one point they had a 4 yo ds, a 2yo ds, and then newborn twins. !!!
My kids are close in age, but...wow!
Still. It's always such a production, emotionally, when I get pregnant...and such a production afterwards, that I'd much rather go through it once and come out the other side with two more kids in tow.
I don't actually throw up when I have m/s, (makes me feel weirdly like a lucky failure); I just retch enough to tear my stomach and get ulcers.
I have great luck with ginger and green tea.
I can't recommened Managing Morning Sickness enough.
There are lots of ideas in there--like, keeping cool with fans, staying warm...
aromatherapy: mint and lemon help a TON; chop up a lemon, wrap it in a handkerchief, and take it everywhere with you so you can sniff it when you start to feel icky);
and lists of foods but flavor and texture. I found I need earthy and sour foods when I've got m/s, so I have lots of hot sour soup and miso and citrus.
Other people need bready or sweet--I had a friend with terrible, debilitating m/s, the kind where she had to be on an IV at home and have help come in, and she swore by cinnamon buns and Wendy's Frostees because "they're good going down and not too bad coming back up".
And when things got really bad for me, and the ginger/green tea/raspberry wasn't helping as much, I would take a Benedryl.
I know some ladies don't like to take anything when they're pregnant, but when I would get to the point where I wasn't sleeping more than 20 minutes at a time because of the retching, the antihistamines would both calm the nausea a bit and make me sleepy.
Being too tired will make m/s much worse. You need to get plenty of rest.
Morning sickness is a hard job--my sympathy and praise for all you ladies slogging around with that burden right now.
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quote:Originally posted by Sachiko: My husband's best friend has twin girls--so at one point they had a 4 yo ds, a 2yo ds, and then newborn twins. !!!
I know someone (not very well) who had twins. And then when the twins were just under 2, had quads. (No fertility drugs involved.)
I guess they survived (even had a few more singletons), because the twins must be about 16 now. Maybe 17.
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I want twins, but I can say that because I just got married and have babies on the brain. I have always wanted them and for the reasons others do, two for one pregnancy, and because twins are adorable. Ever since my mom told me she thought it was possible I was a twin (but wondered if some heavy bleeding early on in the pregnancy wasn't a miscarriage). Boy and boy, girl and girl, boy and girl, identical or no, I wouldn't care. I babysat twin newborns once and I must say that it was a very difficult night, but it didn't sway me. I don't have much to worry about, though. No twins run in my family or his.
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See, I don't anticipate ever saying "stop" to having kids. So I figure I have time to have kids, I don't need to try to speed things along by having multiples-- especially since that would put me at more risk for complications and a cesarian, which could complicate any pregnancies after that one.
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I'm not in a hurry intellectually, but my body seems to be--7 pregnancies in 8 years of marriage, no matter how many "goalies on the ice" we've used.
I've gotten to like the babies, and look forward to having more, so while I'm not thinking "I've got to have all of them NOW" I'm also not thinking I want the flood to slow down.
Even though I have roughly another 20 years, give or take, of childbearing left.
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I've had 5 pregnancies in 5 years of marriage-- that's why I say there's no hurry! I guess I figure it's going to be enough, in the end, without the extra stress!
If I finished at 40, and kept going at this rate, I would end up with 10 kids. But we're thinking at some point we may try to speed it up a little, if we can (just probably not right now) since I think I want more than that.
But I don't know that I'll have until 40, or that I'll be finished then, either. My mom's family is decidedly varied on when menopause occurs; some early, some right on average, some late, and a lot of emergency hysterectomies precluding natural menopause in the direct line...
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I'd like 12; one of my close friends in Boise has 15. She had hers between a year and two years apart, usually getting pregnant again by the time the last one was 9 months old.
I personally prefer having two really close, like a year apart, and then cooling for a couple of years, then having another two...
but of course since I've never planned a pregnancy anyway, it's all just conjecture.
KQ, if you guys are going to speed it up at some point, wouldn't having two at once be a fast way of doing that? Posts: 575 | Registered: Jan 2004
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That was everyone's reaction at the time, as I recall.
All the local girls' high school "chesed groups" sent young women over for at least 2 years, as I recall. So there was a fair bit of community support. But yeah, quite glad it wasn't me. Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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Twins and then quads blows my mind too. I'm still amazed at how remarkably sane my aunt is after having 2 sets of twins (at the time they had a 6 year old girl, 4 year old girl, and twin 2 year old boys when the twin girls were born). I don't think I could have done it.
Much as I love children and my own little one, I won't be having anywhere near 10 or 12 children. I think 2 would be great (which works out well I think, since I had Beanie at 30 and would like to be done with pregnancies by 35, while having a little breather in between). I can't believe Beanie is 6 months old today! Where has the time gone?!
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Don't forget - twice the babies, twice the pregnancy symptoms. I slept for 10 hours last night, 5 hours today, and I'm exhausted (Andrew is home all day to watch Aerin, thank goodness). I also think I might throw up the ginger ale I just drank. I've lost 5 pounds so far.
Thank goodness for the teenage girls at shul. They love babies, and Aerin, too. I have a cadre of babysitters. They're so excited for the twins (small shul in a small town - everyone knows).
My cerclage is scheduled for July 23rd. I'll be a little more than 12 weeks along. I'm praying that the nausea and exhaustion will at least get manageable by then and that the OHSS will be almost gone.
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Poor Mrs M! I'm glad you have so much help.
I'm at 18 1/2 weeks. 2 weeks till our next ultrasound and I cannot wait. I want to see the baby again.
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