posted
Vice President Cheney seems to love secrecy. Honestly, he is so secretive the most recent fight with congress is about the fact that he doesn't even want to tell another executive department how secretive he's being.
However, with a little voodoo magic, an in with imprisoned insider Scooter, and some top top secret technical surveillance I have discovered some of the secrets he's trying to keep.
I'm putting them here before the Cheney Police knock at my door and make me disappear. Any apologies if by exposing these secrets on this forum causes it or the entire internet to self destruct. Our only hope is that Cheney's arch foe, King of the Internet Al Gore, will use his fatherlike influence on the internet to stop Cheney's ability to silence the truth.
In regards to Guantanamo:
quote: Scooter: But sir, Guantanimo? Why do you want to put our terrorist interrogation headquarters in a place with a name so...so...Latin?
Cheney: Not Latin, Spanish my friend, and the Spanish will help keep it hidden from the world.
Scooter: Spanish? How can that help keep it hidden.
Cheney: Because, Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.
On the Firing of the Attorneys:
quote: Scooter: But why 8 new lawyers? What is it about these 8 that make them better than those we already have working for us.
Cheney: I've got four that want to hold me, three that want to scold me. One says she's a friend of mine. Take it easy. Take it easy.
On Senate Subpoenas:
quote: Scooter: All the want is the truth. Would it be so bad to give it to them?
Cheney: The Truth? You want the truth? You can't handle the truth!
Scooter: I probably couldn't, but perhaps congress could?
posted
Cheney is secretive not because he is evil, but because he wants to hide his lack of evil, his goodness, from the world. He is sick of being tough.