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Author Topic: Is there a moral obligation to help struggling classmates?
Belle
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Background info, to be followed by question:

I am taking a class this term called "Grammar and Usage for English Teachers" - it's a 400-level Linguistics class (also cross-listed as a 500-level graduate class) designed for those like me who are working on becoming certified to teach secondary English.

There is a pre-requisite for the class - Linguistics 250, an introductory course in linguistics. However, many of the people in the class did not take the pre-req. (I did, last year.) The reason for this is that this class recentely got added as mandatory for those in the education program, and the professor who teaches it is going on sabbatical next term - so anybody who wants to student teach in the spring or next fall must take the class this term, with no time to take the pre-req. Therefore, the prof was lenient and allowed a lot of people to sign in the class without the pre-req.

I would estimate more than half the class did not take the 250 course. And they are struggling. Big time. I did take the 250 course plus I love linguistics and have fun with it so I am not struggling in the least. In fact, I'm frustrated with how slowly we're going, if you want to know the truth. Many of the people in the class have picked up on this, and since most of them know me from other classes, I've been bothered and badgered and pressured to hold a study group and help them. I've been asked for my home phone number, people have said they want to call me if they have questions, and I've had them really lean on me to come in this weekend to a study session they're holding at the library.

And I said no. Mainly because I spent Friday night at my daughter's high school football game, then Saturday at my son's youth football game, and today - Sunday - I wanted to relax and spend time with my family. I think if you take a class with a pre-req and you skip the pre-req you should hold yourself responsible for the material and learn it on your own. If I took differential equations and didn't know calculus I wouldn't expect other students in the class to teach me calculus on their own time.

Well, some people think I'm being mean and have said that I should be willing to help them. I think the issue here is their lack of preparation for the class and the prof signing them in without making sure they knew the material. Neither of those is my fault.

So, what do you think? Am I being a witch by not helping them? Should I feel guilty for not sacrificing my weekend to help them get ready for our first test (which is tomorrow)?

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SoaPiNuReYe
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WWJD [Big Grin]
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Belle
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Good question, Soap. Truly, it is. That's why I ask the question - wondering if people do think there is a moral obligation here. Is it the kind and compassionate and Christian thing to do to bail them out? Or, are they better off if they learn to handle this on their own, without me enabling their poor decision to take a senior level class (and in some cases a graduate class) without any preparation?
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porcelain girl
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I don't think you are obligated, especially because you are a busy parent and wife.

However, in most cases I find that study and homework groups make things easier on everyone. My spanish teacher (from Mexico and Indonesia) said she never understood why American students insisted on doing everything on their own, when we could split up the work and then teach our answers to each other. It's a cultural difference; we're so individualistic.

She made a good point, which I tend to agree with. But it only works if everyone is there to put in an effort.

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Belle
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porce, another good reason I'm conflicted. Normally a study group or tutoring session will help me as much as it helps the people I'm tutoring. However, in this case I truly don't need it - the material we're covering for this first test is incredibly easy (for someone with the pre-requisite knowledge) and is really more of a review. I probably could have done well on the test before the year even started.

*sigh* The problem is that if it worries me enough that I have to ask about it and think about it so much, it probably means there is a part of me that feels very guilty for not helping. Though I wonder if that is a good or bad thing - I need to be able to draw boundaries and tell people no, and sometimes I struggle with that.

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ketchupqueen
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I think that if you did not have a family, you might have more of a moral obligation. But as a parent, you have an obligation to your children and family FIRST, which includes the obligation to take care of yourself and not overtax yourself so you can be there for them.

Right now Jeff misses a lot of church activities, including service projects, that he might otherwise attend. Between school and work, he doesn't get a lot of time with us, and he feels that helping me out and being there for the things our kids want to do is more important than serving someone outside the family right now. I think it's a similar situation.

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Sharpie
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I do not think you have a moral obligation to help them. If -- very big if -- you didn't have other seriously important moral obligations to your family, you might be able to spare more time to help the other students. But your time commitment to your children has to come first. IMO. It's part of the balance you had to figure out when you signed up for classes to begin with, right? "I can spend this much time on classes, this much time on studying, and still have the NECESSARY time for my kids."

I'm not religious, but I used to be, and I took very seriously the idea of prioritizing in this way: God, family, others. I still prioritize in that way, just in an unreligious way.

My answer to them would be somewhat based on that. I'm really sorry, if I could I would, but I can't put my kids on the back burner, not for my own grades, not for anyone else's. I MIGHT drag out notes from the last class and let them photocopy them.

I also don't respond at all well to badgering :-). Stick to your guns, I say. You are not being at all mean. You are taking care of your life in the way that works for you.

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rollainm
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Personally, I think your situation presents some excellent financial opportunities.

But seriously, you'll have to do what you feel is best. Yes, helping those who are struggling would be a nice thing for you to do, but your own priorities and sanity come first.

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BlueWizard
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Well, you specifically said 'Moral' obligation, and I say you are absolutely NOT under any 'moral' obligation.

However, their is a slight social obligation to help, although 'obligation' is an overstatement. More accurately, there is a slight social precedent to help them. But not at the sacrifice of your family.

Would it be fair to say that most in this class are footloose and fancy-free young college students, where as you are an adult seeking education? Even if you are the same age as them, being married with children, you have other higher priorities.

Plus I can't believe you are the only person to on campus to have taken (or is currently taking) Linguistics 250.

I'm guessing you are not unwilling to help them. If circumstances allowed, you probably would. But, you have limited time and lots of demands on that time, so I can sympathize with the priorities you have set.

Perhaps you can find some other time and place to help, but I have to wonder if they want you to merely help them understand the current class, or if they want you to teach them Linguistics 250 on the side. The university gets paid piles of money to teach that class, yet they expect you to teach if for free.

I do sympathize with your situation, but a part of me has to sympathize with the other students too. I'm sure they are struggling in an important class. But based on what you said, I do question how well they have their priorities adjusted. Is it school first, or party first - school second?

Consider, that you could make some money off this by offering to tutor them as a group on a day and a time that is convenient to you. That way you have offered to help, you get practice teaching, and they can take it or leave it.

Sorry, rambling a bit, but hopefully there's some help in there somewhere.

Steve/BlueWizard

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Fitz
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Well, I've been in both positions. I've excelled in certain classes, and helped my fellow students who were struggling, and I've also been the struggling student. That being said, if I had a wife and children, and was already limited in my free time, I wouldn't sacrifice my weekend either. I sure appreciated it when a peer of mine was willing to help me catch up or master a difficult concept, but I certainly didn't think that they were obligated to help me, and I definitely didn't hold a grudge or criticize anyone who wasn't willing to help.

Maybe your fellow students should look to the professor to provide some extra sessions to go over difficult material. I went to a smaller college where this was the norm, but I also went to a large university where some of the professors didn't give a damn. I would say if this particular prof bent the rules to allow unprepared students into his/her class, he/she should deal with the consequences.

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King of Men
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quote:
Originally posted by Belle:
Good question, Soap. Truly, it is. That's why I ask the question - wondering if people do think there is a moral obligation here. Is it the kind and compassionate and Christian thing to do to bail them out? Or, are they better off if they learn to handle this on their own, without me enabling their poor decision to take a senior level class (and in some cases a graduate class) without any preparation?

If you are genuinely asking yourself WWJD, I should think that moral obligation does not come into it. Are you not to be helpful even to those whom you have no obligation to? "Even as you have done..."
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kojabu
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quote:
Consider, that you could make some money off this by offering to tutor them as a group on a day and a time that is convenient to you. That way you have offered to help, you get practice teaching, and they can take it or leave it.
I was going to say something very similar. I don't know if I'd charge them money for it because even though you understand the material, helping them will probably help you to reinforce it. But I probably wouldn't go to their study sessions if they hadn't chosen a time with you that worked for everyone.
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scholar
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Have any of these students helped you out significantly in another class? If you have received aid from them more than you have given in the past, I would say you do have an obligation. Otherwise, anything you do is out of the kindness of your heart.
I have a situation right now where I am definetely acting one sided in my studies and figure that the family justifies it. We have a journal club where there is a clearly stated expectation that if you come, you will present. I don't. With the baby and my current childcare situation, I don't feel like I can do that. I don't just not show up because I know that when faculty decide funding, they look at how many people attend, not how many people present.

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docmagik
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quote:
The problem is that if it worries me enough that I have to ask about it and think about it so much, it probably means there is a part of me that feels very guilty for not helping. Though I wonder if that is a good or bad thing - I need to be able to draw boundaries and tell people no, and sometimes I struggle with that.
It's funny that you should have posted this today.

I just got done posting a review on my blog of a book that talks about just this kind of thing--the guilt that we feel when do things we don't know are right.

If you get the chance to read it, I'd really reccomend it, although I understand how with school and kids and pestering classmates how this might not be easy. [Wink]

What the book would not do is tell you what the absolutely right thing to do in this case is. Because the only person who really knows what you feel is right is you.

What the book does do is talk about all the things that can happen when we start trying to justify a decsion we feel is bad.

For example (and I'm only using your example because it came up in this thread, not because I think you're doing any of these things), if somebody was in a situation like yours, and then decided not to do it. That could be the right decision.

The problem comes when the person starts trying to justify it. They start thinking poorly of the students for not taking the other class. Or looking for times in class when they see the people being lazy. Or looking for other things that paint the people as being who it is "convienient" for us to have them be instead of who they "are."

The same thing could happen the other way.

The person could go, and help the kids. And then look for proof they're a martyr for having done it. Or use it to fuel their ego in thinking they're a great christian. Or then take credit for any success the kids had after the incident.

So the answer is, I guess, to just be perfectly honest with yourself about whether you think it really is important to your values to help these kids, or whether you think helping these kids would just help fuel an image of who you think you're "supposed" to be.

And whether you truly feel that the rejuvination you find on Sunday nights is neccessary for you to be able to get through the next week or whether you're just using that to justify not doing something you know to be right.

So it's often in our attempts to justify or rationalize why what we did was right that we run into moral problems--since most of the time (as in this case) there are perfectly moral reasons to follow both courses of actions.

So the book would suggest doing what you truly and fundamentally feel is right, and then not giving it much thought after that.

In this case, a person could be feeling like he needs to help the other students because he thinks it's the right thing to do. Or it could be that he feels like he needs to help them because he subconciously needs that good act to reinforce the story he tells himself about what a good person he is.

Obviously, the first would be a good reason, and the second one wouldn't. The second might cause his family unneccarry sacrifice in the name of appeasing his ego.

Of course, similar things could be said about staying home. There's reasons to do it that are noble, and reasons to do it that are selfish.

A helpful couple of exercises to help you find your right answer might be these:

1. A: Picture the students at the study session as it will be if you do not go. Then picture the study session as it will be if you go.

B: Picture your home life as it will be if you do not go to the study session. Then picture how it will be if you do go.

2. A: Picture your coming week for yourself as it will be if you go to the study session. Then picture the coming week as it will be if you do go.

B: Picture your coming week for your classmates as it will be if you do not go to the study session. Then picture how it will be if you do go.

C: Picture your coming week for your family if you do go. Then picture it if you do not go.

Doing these exercises might show you something about what will really give you peace and joy. By seeing which images make you uncomfortable, and which bring you smiles, which ones were changed by what you did and which ones weren't, and which changes mattered to you.

And they might not.

Anyway, hope this helps.

(Please note: If any of that was poorly worded to make it sound like I know what the right answer to any of these questions are, or that I'm judging, I'm sorry. I do know what might be right for me, but I think it would be presumtuous to assume that my own right answer is right for you. I honestly think I have no idea what to tell you as far as which is right.

I also know this isn't a thread about that book I read, but since morality was brought up in the thread title, and I just happened to be reading a book about morality, I thought I'd bring it's thoughts into play. If none of this is helpful, thank you for letting me induldge in an exercise to further understand what the book is teaching me.)

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Christine
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I definitely wouldn't give out my home home phone number. That's above and beyond.

However, I can sympathize with their plight -- it's not just that they are taking a class without the proper preparation it's that due to a complicated kink in the system, they almost have no choice. Actually, given all that, it should probably be the teacher making himself available for extra help and catchup sessions.

It's going to be tough to be the good guy in this. I think it would be very nice of you to set up a couple of study sessions to help them out. Heck, you're training to be a teacher, right? [Smile]

You've got obligation. Don't do more than you can. Don't make yourself crazy, and don't feel guilty if you have to say no. You didn't make the class a requirement, then only offer it this semester, and then let in students who did not have a prerequisite. I only mean to say it would be very nice of you if you can and would do a couple of study sessions.

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porcelain girl
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quote:
Consider, that you could make some money off this by offering to tutor them as a group on a day and a time that is convenient to you. That way you have offered to help, you get practice teaching, and they can take it or leave it.
This is completely reasonable. Someone mentioned social precedent, and there is a precedent for this. You can offer your services, twenty dollars an hour, and if ten students are interested they only need to throw in two dollars each for an hour review of important information. Since none of them are helping YOU study or learn, you should be compensated as a tutor.
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Tante Shvester
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I've been in similar situations. I've agreed to be in a study group, but then dropped out of it when I found that not only was it not helping me, it was costing me -- time, babysitting expenses, yadda ya. I have had classmates approach me about tutoring them in a class where I'm doing well and they are struggling, and I usually am glad to help with that, largely because we can do it on my terms. For a study group, you need group consensus for when and how often and where to meet. When I am tutoring, I can say that I'm available Thursday mornings from 9-10:30 in the library.
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Synesthesia
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Do you have old notes to loan them or something?
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Flaming Toad on a Stick
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I've always liked tutoring. It always gave me those warm fuzzies inside when a kid I'm tutoring masters a tricky concept, or gets a good mark on the test they've been dreading. In your case, however, alloting such a significant portion of your free time might very well be unreasonable. Doesn't the class have any teaching assistants? Does the prof offer office hours? Perhaps you could refer the students to them?
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romanylass
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You have a family, and it's not selfish of you to spend your time with them. I like the idea of offering to tutor for pay- that could help with college expenses!
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dkw
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The problem with the tutoring for pay idea is that it kind of argues against the "I can't take the time away from my family" logic. Either Belle has the time to spare or she doesn't. If she does, then she can consider whether or not to offer free help to yher classmates or whether she's only willing to help if they pay her. But if the reason she can't help is that she doesn't have the time, then she doesn't have the time to do it for pay either.
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Uprooted
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I'm not reading the thread, so this is probably repetitious. But my initial reaction is that you have no obligation whatsoever to hold a study group. Your time is yours to spend as you choose; I am sure that there are other resources available (like, say, their books and class notes) to the other struggling students.
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Belle
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quote:
Do you have old notes to loan them or something?
I type my notes, that's how I keep my study information organized, and I have emailed some people stuff and in one case even printed some out for another student, even though I got charged for the pages at a university computer lab.

None of these people have helped me in previous classes, that's usually MY role. I did a lot to help people prepare for our Shakespeare final last term, and some of the same people are in this class, and I think that's why they're pestering me - they want me to help the same amount as I did with Shakespeare. Literature is different though. I certainly do get a lot out of study sessions with other students where we can discuss the literature and talk about different aspects together. With this, not so much. I mean, either you know that "he" is a 3rd person singular masculine subject case personal pronoun, or you don't.

And yes, the vast majority are young, a few are married but I'm the only one with kids.

It's a moot point now, I didn't go. And the test is tomorrow and I refuse to feel guilty over it. The professor does have office hours, they could go see him if they wanted, but most of them are intimidated by him. I have good relationship with him, I respect him as a professor, he respects me as a student and we have a good rapport that shows up in class. I think people assume that I know everything, when really it's just that the professor remembers me as a conscientious student from a prior term.

At any rate, had I taken the class without the pre-req, I would have bought the 250 book, I would have read it, I would have prepared myself by going over the material I am expected to walk in the class knowing. If other didn't do that, and came to the class unprepared, it's really not my fault. I have decided not to feel guilty about it if they get poor grades, it's not my doing.

Oh, I wouldn't tutor for money either. I don't feel qualified to take people's money when my only exposure to the subject matter is a sophomore level class. There are some graduate linguistics students around who might be interested in that, I know some of them, maybe I could suggest some of my classmates get in touch with them. Maybe Jon Boy wants to run an on-line tutoring session. [Wink]

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Valentine014
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I can understand why you feel guilty. You have a giving nature and you want to be able to help these people. I mean, come on, you are going to school to become a teacher, that is one of the most unselfish choices of professions! But, family comes first. College is hard enough without kids, and especially during your senior year. I say, politely tell them you are sorry and that your free time is spend with family. I don't feel you are obligated to say any more than that.
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Mrs.M
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You have zero obligation to help them out and, frankly, I think it's quite rude to badger anyone for help the way you have been bothered. No one is responsible for their poor decision-making but themselves. Also, they won't go to the professor because they're intimidated? I'm sorry, but that is something they just need to get over. Also, as the wife of a professor, I can assure anyone that professors would much rather help students than flunk them. I find it hard to believe that you are only resource they can find to help them. It shows how sweet you are that you feel guilty, rather than annoyed and resentful.

BTW, I assume that Natalie made the drill team? I don't remember reading about it. Yay for her!

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Lupus
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In school I would help my friends in classes...but that is a bit different. I also have teamed up with people for group projects who perhaps were not as good in the subject as I was...but again, they were also my friends.

I don't think you had any obligation to your classmates...that is the job of the professor. If I were you, I would just point out the fact that you have kids. Your responsibility to your family far outweighs your responsibility to your classmates.

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brojack17
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If it takes time away from your family or if you are not going to get anything out of it, then don't do it. You have your own responsibilities and they have theirs. Don't feel bad about it.
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andi330
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Not to sound too callous (which this probably will) but doesn't your school have a tutoring program? Most colleges have tutors available, often at no extra cost to the student. I really believe that you have no obligation, moral or otherwise, to help these people. In fact, if I were in your shoes, I would probably already have told said people, in no uncertain terms, that they need to realize that I had responsibilities beyond my schoolwork, and that they needed to recognize that I was not saying no to be mean or unfair, but because I simply was not able to assist them.

This post probably sounds a bit snarky, but one of my biggest pet peeves are people who think that because I have more knowledge on a subject than they do, I automatically have to assist them when they struggle. The people in this class have no right to expect your help. They may want it, they may ask you for it, but if you say no, for whatever reason, that's your right, and they need to be respectful of that.

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dean
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From my angle-- perhaps if you help these people catch up, the class will be able to go faster and you'll be able to learn more than if much of the class time is taken up by the professor's trying to catch up those who haven't taken the pre-req. Plus, you'll also have the fun of sharing something you enjoy with others, deepening your own understanding of it.
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Belle
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dean, another good point, but after class last week the prof spoke to me and a few of the others who took the pre-req and he said "hand-holding time was over" to use his exact quotes. Once we start diagramming he said it's sink or swim, because everyone should have had the diagramming already and that he won't slow down for them anymore. *shrug* we'll see. He's a good teacher who wants his students to get it so I don't think he'll just let people flounder if they ask questions in class. What bugs me is so many people keep asking questions now - things I think they should know. I mean really, if you're a senior in the English department shouldn't you already know what a subordinating conjunction does? And how to tell passive from active voice?

Oh well, I've spent too much time on this computer tonight, my back hurts - I'm going to bed. In addition to this test tomorow, I have two papers I'm writing, so what time I didn't spend with the kids today I've spent working. I did take time out this evening to read two chapters from Prisoner of Azkaban to the kidlets - sometimes even homework needs to take a backseat for the really important stuff. [Wink]

So when I told them I was going to be too busy this weekend, I really didn't lie. I have spent most of the day either doing stuff with them, or working on school work.

What will really be funny is if the people who came to study group today do better on the test than I do. [Wink] That will teach me a lesson about being cocky.

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advice for robots
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You're doing a good job, Belle.
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ketchupqueen
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quote:
And how to tell passive from active voice?
Good grief. I agree, if they don't know that by now they probably wouldn't get much out of your help anyway-- they need an actual tutor and/or class.
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Samprimary
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quote:
I've been bothered and badgered and pressured to hold a study group and help them. I've been asked for my home phone number, people have said they want to call me if they have questions, and I've had them really lean on me to come in this weekend to a study session they're holding at the library.

And I said no.

And if they expected you in any way to be compelled morally or obligated otherwise to have you help them out, then bully on them.
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katharina
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I think it's fine that you don't hold a study group. There is no obligation.

I wonder, though, how they know that you're the one to go to. Do you talk a lot about how easy it is for you? Do you mention that these are all things covered in the prereq class? How do they know that you know everything? If you're talking a lot about how easy it is for you and then refusing to share, it isn't wrong to refuse to share but it's a little tacky to be bragging about how you could but won't.

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Irami Osei-Frimpong
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quote:
Is there a moral obligation to help struggling classmates?
No. Since you never agreed to help, you aren't obligated. You are, however, obliged to help, for no other reason than chance and circumstance have aligned to put you in a position to be of service. It's like jumping in and saving a kid drowning in a river.

I think you should hold a study group, but only because it's a nice thing to do and I like living in a world where people help struggling classmates. There are always going to be countervailing family responsibilities. That's part of what it is to live in both a public and private world.

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pH
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quote:
Originally posted by katharina:
I think it's fine that you don't hold a study group. There is no obligation.

I wonder, though, how they know that you're the one to go to. Do you talk a lot about how easy it is for you? Do you mention that these are all things covered in the prereq class? How do they know that you know everything? If you're talking a lot about how easy it is for you and then refusing to share, it isn't wrong to refuse to share but it's a little tacky to be bragging about how you could but won't.

I can't see Belle being tacky. [Smile]

-pH

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Mucus
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To go back to the OP:
Not that I'm saying that you should hold a study group (you probably shouldn't), however, having your mandatory courses change (added or removed) while going through a program really does suck, especially when space/terms taught for the added course are limited.

Been there, done that, ick [Wink]

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Javert Hugo
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Then they must know she has the information they do not from some other method. [Smile]
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Zalmoxis
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It sounds like the department needs to hire you as a Graduate Teaching Assistant to run an extra 1-2 credit lab section of the course that will help the students get up to speed. [Big Grin]
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scholar
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They know from past classes that Belle knows what she is doing. Remember, this is senior level course so lots of people she has been in classes with from before. Also, depending on what questions she asks or comments she makes, people now how well others understand the material.
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El JT de Spang
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Especially given that she said the professor knows her from previous classes.

Believe me, you don't have to say a word about your grades or knowledge level, participate in class discussions, or even show up to class for your classmates to pick up that you know what's going on. Don't ask me how, but I got a reputation as someone who could tutor people before I made a single friend in any of my classes.

I didn't even go to class half the time and I'd have people coming up to me in the cafeteria asking me if I could help them with [random subject].

By my senior year I had people asking me in the computer lab if I'd tutor them in subjects I'd never even taken. At that point, though, I at least understood why they were asking me; because I'd developed a reputation as someone who was happy to help and could typically figure out whatever problem it was they were having.

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El JT de Spang
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Oh yeah, and re: the initial post -- no, there's no moral obligation to help your classmates.

It's definitely the neighborly thing to do if you have time, but you shouldn't feel bad that you'd rather spend your out of class time with your family.

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Belle
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quote:
I wonder, though, how they know that you're the one to go to. Do you talk a lot about how easy it is for you? Do you mention that these are all things covered in the prereq class? How do they know that you know everything? If you're talking a lot about how easy it is for you and then refusing to share, it isn't wrong to refuse to share but it's a little tacky to be bragging about how you could but won't.
They know I know the material well because the professor chats with me during class. Not just me, but another girl who also took the pre-req along with me. He'll call us out and have us answer things. And, there's inside jokes that we get and others don't. So, it's obvious the professor knows us and has taught us and that we know him.

He'll say things like "Do you guys know my philosophy about example sentences?" No one will answer, and he'll say "Belle and Tracy know - tell them." So we'll then tell them how he feels about boring example sentences (he says if we're English majors we should be able to come up with creative examples, he hates reading sentences that all have pronouns as subjects.)

So, it's not on purpose and it's certainly not showing off, but it's still very, very clear that Tracy and I have a handle on the material and a rapport with him. Stuff like that makes it obvious. I'm not intentionally sending out a "know-it-all" vibe, but I admit it's possible some people may perceive one anyway.

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Zalmoxis
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Talk to Tracy. Find out if students have been pestering her. If she feels somewhat like you do, both of you talk to the professor, and express your concerns that much of the class didn't have the prereq and that they are going to need extra help and that you don't want the curriculum to lag.

Best solution, imo, would be for the prof to either set up a formal study group for the students that are lagging or for him to slow down for the rest of the group and give you and Tracy some extra attention.

It may sound presumptuous to do that. But this is the sort of unique situation that, I think, warrants a creative solution. And I have seen it happen.

Or to put it another way: since he doesn't have enough office hours to help the students individually, he reworks the class time to focus on them and then turns part of his office hours into a master class for those who had the prereq and are beyond the others.

I realize that that's not fully consistent with "this is what Class #Whatever" is supposed to be, but profs often are forced to adjust curriculum based on the demographics of the class.

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Blayne Bradley
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no, your only obligated to feel guity about not helping them.
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vonk
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So, did they all fail the test and chase you out of the class with pitchforks?
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Belle
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Nope. A few said it was eaiser than they expected. One particular girl was rather cool to me, but I'm not going to worry overmuch about it.

As for me, I think I did well, probably an A.

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enjeeo
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You are not their teacher, and you are not the person who let them into a course without the necessary prerequisite. You don't have an obligation to help them catch up on something they can catch up on by themselves. What they need to be doing is going to the lecturerer who let them into the course and asking for advice on what resources they can use to catch up (the reading list for the pre-req would be a good start) and an outline of what they need to try and cover to catch up.

Some people would argue that we should always give help whenever we are able to help, but there is a bigger picture to consider:
(a) will this help come at the expense of your family, to whom you DO have an obligation?
(b) is help available to them from other sources? and
(c) do they really need help, or do they simply lack initiative?

You are not being mean, and anyone who is trying to make you feel guilty over this should step off.

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scifibum
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I'll just be a little harsher than everyone else and say where do these brats come off trying to pressure you into helping them?

It would be no real help. These are the people that graduate college and get jobs where they sweet talk and cajole their coworkers into doing their jobs for them, and thereby depress and drain the economy. I'm serious. People that can't fend for themselves are a net liability to society and if you enable this tendency you're just hurting us all.

We don't know what Jesus would do because he didn't really comment on the importance of a university education.

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MrSquicky
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I'd say, yeah, you do have a moral obligation to help them. However, it is not an absolute obligation. It needs to be balanced against other factors, not the least of which is your obligation to your family.

In a hypothetic case where you had ample time and no other commitments, I think it is not morally right to refuse help (although on your terms, assuming those terms are reasonable), In the real world, you've got to balance everything out.

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