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» Hatrack River Forum » Archives » Landmark Threads » My 1,206th Post, or: Why I'm Cool and Indispensible to Hatrack

   
Author Topic: My 1,206th Post, or: Why I'm Cool and Indispensible to Hatrack
Jon Boy
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I actually forgot to do this at my 1,206th post, so I'm actually about 20 posts late. Oh well. After Ralphie's suggestion, I just had to take this opportunity.

So why am I cool? Well, first of all, I know tons of stuff about English grammar, usage, punctuation, and style. If that doesn't make someone cool, I don't know what does.

"So what else makes Jon Boy cool?" you may be asking. Well, here are a few things:

  • I love cartoons (though most new ones suck). Some of my favorites are Animaniacs, Pinky & the Brain, Sam & Max, The Tick, and The Angry Beavers.
  • I read comic strips religiously. My favorites are Calvin & Hobbes, The Norm, Dilbert, Sherman's Lagoon, and Peanuts.
  • I have loved Star Wars all my life. I want to be a Jedi knight. I don't really confuse Star Wars and Star Trek, though I like to joke about it.
  • I love Zork, though I haven't beaten all of them.
  • I'm one of the only English majors in the world who doesn't plan on being a teacher or going on to law school. And actually, I'm switching to the new English language (as in English linguistics, not TESOL or ESL or something) when it opens in the fall. I can't wait to call myself a philologist, partly because it sounds cool, and partly because that's what Tolkien was.
  • If I had enough time, money, and energy, I'd double-major in English language and art (drawing and painting emphasis). I'd also get minors in linguistics, English, computers and humanities, and editing. As it is, I'll just have to settle for the one major and two minors (art and editing [but maybe English, too]).
  • I actually like editing. However, I like writing more. In addition to having my own web site where I sporadically post stuff, I'm working on a new online student publication called Inspite Magazine. BYU students (or anyone, really), please check it out.
  • I have manly stubble . . . when I don't shave, anyway.
  • I love Robert Jordan but hate Terry Goodkind. Don't even try to tell me they're the same.

I'm sure I have plenty of other cool traits that make me indispensible to Hatrack, but I have a hard time remembering all of them.

Hmm. Maybe I should think about adding "humility" to my list of cool traits . . .

Edit: Typos, omissions, and clarity.

[This message has been edited by Jon Boy (edited February 21, 2003).]


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Icarus
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dkw
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False advertising! I clicked on that link expecting manly stubble and it was barely a shadow.

*goes off to look at Aragorn pin-up calendar for true stubble-fix*


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Jon Boy
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Barely a shadow! Hmph. For someone as facial-hair-impaired as me, I think it's pretty good.
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Ethics Gradient
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Yes, your cooldom reigns over all, JB. Heh, am I being sarcastic?
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Sarcasm
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*strikes again*
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Jon Boy
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Sarcastic? I . . . I don't know! With so much sarcasm running rampant, I've lost the ability to tell the difference between intentional irony and serious statements!
*head explodes*

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Sarcasm
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*runs rampant*
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twinky
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Calvin and Hobbes is a thing of beauty.
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Papa Moose
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Jon Boy, let me know if you continue to have problems with Zork. My only published book includes how to win those.

--Pop


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Ethics Gradient
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Hehe. I've never seen sarcasm run rampant. Does it havea nice running style? How about the track? Is rampant worth running?

Gods, I'm funny.


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ginette
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You're not cool! You are posting all these narcistic threads and promising anything, but when I ask you to be my coach you just IGNORE me!
Bah!

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Sarcasm
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*ties EG's shoelaces together*
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Jon Boy
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Ginette, I'd love to be your coach. What do you need coaching on? It seems that you already speak better English than most native-born Americans.

[This message has been edited by Jon Boy (edited February 19, 2003).]


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Eliza Bennet
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All that, and you look good in a wet shirt.
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Jon Boy
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*slaps forehead*

I knew I was forgetting something!


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Jon Boy
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You know, I was really hoping that the great Ralphie herself would grace my thread with her presence. <sigh>
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T_Smith
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Well, I'll give you the next best thing. Me.

Cool? You? Pshaa, we'll find out when we play Star Wars Trivial Pursuit. I'm going to bring the cards. Maybe we won't actually play a game, but instead just keep track of points. Winner is cooler... geekier... but cooler. Agreed?


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Jon Boy
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Next best thing? Hmm . . .

You're on, T.


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Diosmel Duda
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For the record, I thought Inspite was hilarious. Especially the article about driving in Provo. I agree, and I don't even have a car! How pathetic is that?
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Jon Boy
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Thanks. I'm working on the Valentine's Day issue right now. It's a bit late, but I hope it'll be worth it. I hope to have it up this weekend. I'm also trying to get some more writers so that there's a little more variety.
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Ralphie
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Jon Boy - I was waiting for my agent's permission.

By creating a thread based entirely off of my suggestion (doing your part to perpetuate the idea that I'm The Great Puppet Master) you have indeed made yourself both cool and indespensible to Hatrack.


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jehovoid
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Ralphie's agent

If you have to ask, then I can't tell you.


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Ralphie
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Oh, please. Everyone knows that this is my agent.
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Jon Boy
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It's official -- I've even got the Ralphie Seal (Spank?) of Approval!

Jehovoid: I don't want to ask.

[This message has been edited by Jon Boy (edited February 20, 2003).]


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Jon Boy
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To Diosmel Duda and anyone else who enjoyed Inspite Magazine, the February issue is (finally!) available here.
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ClaudiaTherese
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*thinks Jon Boy is the Cat's Meow

rrrrowwwrr!


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Jon Boy
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Wow. I've never been the cat's meow before. Cat's plaything, or cat's servant, but not cat's meow. Thanks.
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Unmaker
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Maybe you can go back and edit your first post so that the items in your list are numbered, bulleted or somehow separated...

[This message has been edited by Unmaker (edited February 21, 2003).]


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Jon Boy
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Hmm. Good idea. It kind of all runs together. Thanks. I don't know how to do numbered or bulleted lists with UBB code, though.

[This message has been edited by Jon Boy (edited February 21, 2003).]


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TheTick
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  • This is the first bulleted item.
  • This is the second bulleted item.

UBB Code


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Unmaker
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Much better!
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Jon Boy
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Cool. Thanks, Tick.
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Jacare Sorridente
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I am wondering how you can have the unmitigated gall to sport that stubble when you are a BYU student. I am guessing that you don't have a beard card.
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Jon Boy
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Geez, Jacare, did you read the caption? I was on vacation. Give me a break!

During the rest of the year, I only have enough unmitigated gall to sport about two days' growth (though I once got into the testing center with three days' growth). My facial hair is pretty light and sparse, though.

[This message has been edited by Jon Boy (edited February 21, 2003).]


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