So, I don't really know why I'm doing this interview. They just said I'm supposed to tell a bit about myself, and answer some questions. My partner's waiting for me, so, let's make this quick, right?

Right.

So . . .

I'm Kierin Lavin. You can pronounce it Karen Laveen if you want, but it's spelled odd, so it's pronounced odd. It's easier just to say it how you want. I think my mom was probably a bit of a flake, so that's why it's spelled funny, but that's just a guess. I don't remember her.

I'm 25 they say, based on the physiological signs, but I don't know my birthday. It hasn't really proved to be terribly important. I picked New Year's Day, just to make it easy to remember. That, and because the rest of the known universe is celebrating other stuff on New Year's, so . . . no parties.

So, the obvious question . . . where's the memory?

Not sure. I woke up in this room 4 years ago, which I found out later was an ISA research facility. (Yes, THE I.S.A. The big Inter-System Alliance, just to clarify for those of you that have been hiding under a rock for the last 150 years or so.) Some guy was beating the hell out of me screaming at me, but for some reason it didn't hurt.

All of a sudden he stops, says "There you go . . . now . . . do it again, bitch!" I remember his face clear as day when he said that. And then he pulls out this pistol and shoots me in the face. And just instinctively, I knew how to absorb it. It wasn't a big charge, just a little plasma bolt from a crappy little Kellier 248, but still . . . about a quarter million joules or so.

So I did my thing. I sucked up the energy, and I put it down into the floor. And that thermasteel turned red hot in about a quarter second. I jumped back, and he shot me again, and I absorbed it again, and I decided enough was enough, so I put the energy into the air instead.

I don't know if you've tried it, but you superheat air that quick and it just pretty much explodes. Which, of course is why they call me the exploding woman.

Anyway, so I explode, and I look around, and the guy that shot me is out cold, windows are all blasted into nothing, and the door to my cell is hanging open, so I just walked out. A whole bunch of other security dumbasses tried to shoot me, but I just exploded every time and pretty soon they just let me go where I wanted.

I stumbled around the installation for a while, had no idea where I was going and eventually stumbled into Major Brentwood . . . my handler now. He was in deep cover at the time, and he got me out. Blew his cover and everything for me. Got me some clothes, which turned out to be a dumb investment, what with exploding all the time; I swear I spend half the time on missions naked. Anyway, he got me a place to live, and gave me this job, and I've been part of the resistance ever since.

So, I know my name, not sure how; and I know how to speak Standard, and Altaran, and Gesparti; and I know how to redirect energy through my body. And that's pretty much all ANYBODY knows about me.

ISA doesn't like me much. You might have heard about that prison break out in the Altara system . . . on that frozen moon around Corvus. That was me and JJ. We're not exactly covert or anything, but we're agents. That's what they pay us for. Luckily they haven't figured out how to kill me yet. I've thought of a few ways . . . but it's tricky. A lot of people have tried. But we don't dwell on that much.

Then there's "breathtaking". You've never really perceived the world until you've been infused with three million joules of energy, although I guess it was less than that at first. But with that much, you can see way beyond ultraviolet . . . feel sound on your skin.

There's worse things than starting off with that memory. Besides, it was so long ago it doesn't really even matter anymore.

But yeah, it took a bit of time to adjust. Not as much as you'd think. I mean, I don't remember NOT doing this, I just knew how. Just like the languages, and walking, and how to plot a course through hyperspace. It's like breathing for me.

Not like JJ. He remembers being normal, turning telepathic, trying to figure out whether he should learn about it or pretend it didn't exist, running from Psi-Corps, trying to decide if he was a bad guy or a good guy.

I never had any of that. They've just been trying to kill me or mindhack me since day one. Brutal, but it makes the world simple. The good guys are the ones the bad guys are trying to hurt. That's "my kind" as you put it; the good guys.

But yeah, it's a little tough to work with people. I swore for a long time I wouldn't, but The Major wouldn't let me out in the field without a partner.

JJ's been a good partner. He . . . helps me. I think in a lot of ways he has it harder than me. He remembers what it was like to be normal, and he can't have it back.

I've just always been me.

Me, I'm fighting Psi-Corps. That's what I signed on for. That's what The Major and JJ and all of us agents are after. The rest of it, I don't really care. But if the ISA protects them, pays them, supports them . . . they go down too.

And if you haven't heard about Psi-Corps mindhacks there in that rock you're living under, let's just say it makes mere physical rape seem like a fun family theme park ride.

Of course it's all justifiable with the right warrants and papers. At least, if you're Psi-Corps, it is.

As for what's in it for me . . .

. . . I don't really want to talk about it.

Let's just say my 'rude awakening' wasn't really the worst part of waking up. Somebody has to pay for that.

(very long pause)

So . . . it was definitely a mindhack, but . . . it looks like it might have been voluntary. Think . . . the difference between a surgeon and an axe murderer.

I'm sorry, I can't talk about this right now.

(a short pause - she pulls herself together, sits up a bit straighter)

The physical downsides -- I'm not sure. I took a blast of about 23 million joules a few months ago. That was just . . . nuts. I can't even describe it. It was like . . . trying to see the world inside out or something. It was strange.

They say I'm a perfect energy conductor, or something close. I guess that's pretty rare, or impossible or something, so they keep dumping more and more energy through me, just to see if any gets lost anywhere, and where it goes. I don't really get why, but they stop when I say stop, so . . . the least I can do is help 'em out.

But . . . it didn't hurt or anything, and they don't see any long lasting problems, but how far do you go with something like that? Where do you start putting the heat when you get too much energy. There's a whole science around heat-sinking, and I know we're not even close to that kind of energy, but all the big stuff either depends on a lot of infrastructure, which I'm not gonna just carry around in my pocket, or playing tricks with hyperspace. Would YOU want to go sticking your hand in a hyperspace fold? I saw a dock once that a pilot jumped straight out of when his reactor lost containment. It looked like a war zone. I'm not about to put myself anywhere near that if I don't have to.

I've been trying to dump something other than heat lately, and it just doesn't seem to work well.

I don't know . . . research is interesting and everything, but you can only be a guinea pig for so long.

I guess that was a long way of saying that no, there's no real physical downsides. The no-clothes thing gets irritating, but I can work with it when I need to. Oh, and try holding on to something in the middle of an explosion. That's just a bundle of fun. Doable, but it's tricky.

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OOC for a moment: Sorry Josephine, I hate to just blow off all those good questions with a "I don't wanna talk about it", but I just can't see her actually opening up that much. The point of this little aside though is to say thanks for the questions. Those were good ones, 'cause I had only fleshed out the backstory of the actual memory loss part a little. I had to fill in the details a fair bit, although I won't spill them here because I think they'll be important to the storytelling down the road.

As far as the 'acceptance of the current situation' . . . DEFINITELY not, but I'm going to make a point in my stories of portraying avoidance, rather than acceptance. I had though I was already doing that, but I guess not! That was probably the most valuable one for me.