This is topic The crib of civilization (a game) in forum Books, Films, Food and Culture at Hatrack River Forum.


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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
So, let's pretend that I bought my own little continent with no human inhabitants and an awesome climate. I land there to my new haven and start enjoying myself to no end until I realize that I want to start a new civilization. I proclaim myself the ruler of it all and I invite Hatrackers to join in here. What would your role be? Make up your own! I need stuff like high priest(ess), councelors for moi and stuff like that that any other civilization would need. Of course, we also need our military branch so positions in that are open too. Well, start posting people, what would your role be? Just write down the title of your position and a description of it. The description may be as long or as short as you like, but I'd rather have detailed ones because it adds that "zing" to the game. After all, we ARE trying to make up our own culture here. You can invent whatever bogus job you feel like it but it must be of some benefit to us. After our civilization has strength enough to be considered one, we can appoint bad guys too, just to make things intresting.
Just remember to be creative and have fun!


First off, since I'm the ruler, I shall call myself the Zanark, because it sounds cool. The Zanark is basically the ruler of it all. Although she rules it all, she must be a selfless person who thinks about her people before herself. Afterall, the people happen to be stranded there because of her.


My first action as the Zanark is to name our civilization. I shall name it...Pokadoodle.
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
Long live the Zanark of Pokadoodle!

I hereby offer my services as Sumitpo, or The Most Optimistic Person Alive. I claim that it is an absolutely vital service for any (great) civilisation.

I’m not a wise person, in fact I might be at times the most naïve person around, but most often than not, every group needs someone to occupy that position. In fact there can’t be a group without one . In fact, for now, Great Zanark, you have that role yourself! I’ll take that burden off your back .

So my job is to be optimist (nothing to do with optimization!), to have hope when there is none. When everything goes well, I’ll be almost invisible, but when things go wrong, and everybody is exclaiming “It can’t get any worse!” I’ll be the one to exclaim: “Yes, it can!”

I know you will accept my services gladly, I mean, I’m most optimistic about the success of my application.

A., your true Sumitpo.
 

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Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
 
I guess I'll be Tante the leader of the rebel coup that overthrows the potentate Zanark.
 

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Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
 
I'm Major General (The very Model of a Modern Major General) Bradley who prevents the coup through a ruthless campaign of oppression against the rebellion.
 

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Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
 
Aw, Tante, I was gonna lead the rebellion!

Instead, I shall inflitrate the army and backstab Blayne for you, k?
 

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Posted by Tatiana (Member # 6776) on :
 
I want to be in the cabinet, chief advisor on technology, science, and development. I shall be known as Tatiana.

Rebels, know ye that we have better weapons, and always apply them only for truth and justice. I'm advising Zanark to give you a nice state with varied geography to have for your own, in return for your pledge of eternal fealty and solemn oath to uphold the right.

If you start oppressing your citizens, we will have to take it back. Now have fun, play nicely, and come see us if you need any help.
 

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Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
 
You forgot the part where I'm a paranoid careerist, I'ld never let anyone close enough to me to allow them to assasinate me. However don't forget that I'm a brilliant and methodical General Officer, I'll turn the people against the rebellion so you can't become fish within water and with no where to hide all you can do is run.
 

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Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
 
And I shall fill a request Tatiana that we exterminate the rebellion before it spreads, I immiediatly request the emergancy powers nessasary to do my job.
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
I know your plots are useless. The rule of Zanark of Pokadoodle will outlast the eternity.
* wishes good wishes to all plotters though *

PS: wait! I haven't been accepted yet for the position of Sumipto. I take that back.
 

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Posted by Dan_raven (Member # 3383) on :
 
I am Mr. Raven, Manufacturer, Developer, and both Retail and Wholesale markter for all varieties of lethal weapons, poisons, concoctions, and other devices. I sell to both the legitamate government and the rebel alliance, which should make me the richest man in Pokadoodle in about three days.

We have everything you need to send your friends and foes, relatives and strangers, to the next world and beyond. Don't forget to save that something special for yourself.

Now hiring, Ballistic Reseptacle Damage Assesors, Lethal Beverage Taste Analyzers, and Pointed Projectile Product Piercies. If you have built up an immunity to Iocaine Powder, then the retirement benefits are to die for.
 

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Posted by ricree101 (Member # 7749) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Blayne Bradley:
And I shall fill a request Tatiana that we exterminate the rebellion before it spreads, I immiediatly request the emergancy powers nessasary to do my job.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Tante Shvester:
I guess I'll be Tante the leader of the rebel coup that overthrows the potentate Zanark.

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Now citizens, there can't be any seperatists right now, go buy your own continent.

EDIT: Although what Tatiana said is good too, I'll rule you as a colony instead. Your island shall now be known as Rockity. Go, live there, be happy but don't get too cocky or we'll just have to blast you with our...um...pointy hats that shoot lasers.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
The position of Sumitpo goes to SuminonA.
Braine Bradley, you are now my Major General.
Tatiana, you are my chief advisor.
Raventhief, you are my court jester but the minute I eventually find out you are a traitor, well I shall be forced to turn you in to the authorities for your war crimes.
Mr. Raven, you are appointed head of the marketting department, go make me some coasters or something. Make me some with David Bowie in them.

EDIT: *from her balcony where she makes public announcements*
Citizens, the Zanark has spoken!!
*this is the part where the citizens bow down at me.

*turns and goes back to playing with her Star Wars Legos*
All important people that have been appointed their stuff and whatnot, they can stand around and watch those people continue to hail moi.
 

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Posted by Blayne Bradley (Member # 8565) on :
 
*mildly correct spelling* *Blayne*

That is acceptable, but I shall keep a small taskforce to keep watch and the Armed Forces will escourt the rebel forces to th island. I shall obey the civilian governet.
 

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Posted by Tante Shvester (Member # 8202) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Tatiana:
solemn oath to uphold the right.

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quote:

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"I solemly swear to you, that I will not abuse my powers and I will only use them to further the truth and justice in Pokadoodle.
As second in command, should something happen to our wonderful and gracious leader, I will step up and act in her place as the new Zanark in hopes to make her proud. The End."

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Your...um..."application" has been accepted. I appoint you the head of media and mass communications as well as my first mate, or prime minister.

The Zanark has spoken!
All hail! And um...keep them cookies coming in...*squeaks her rubber ducky* (Nellie and I have them all over the bathtub )
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
I hereby send this first official Sumitpo communicate to the head of Pokadoodle's M&MC. To be distributed without discrimination.
“The seeds of greatness are planted in Pokadoodle foundations! The soil is full of … er … nutritious substances. The rain will do the rest ”

I also have another suggestion. In my (high) quality of Sumitpo, I offer to make the forecasts. From weather forecasts, to horoscopes, oracle past/present/future predictions and such. [Note: I leave the Prophet Business to those interested in preaching.]

I sustain my suggestion with a simple reason: You better have optimistic forecast and be glad when it comes true, than have pessimistic forecast and then be not so glad when it comes true.

Your true Sumitpo, A.
 

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Posted by Nellie Bly (Member # 9129) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by suminonA:
[QB] I hereby send this first official Sumitpo communicate to the head of Pokadoodle's M&MC. To be distributed without discrimination.
“The seeds of greatness are planted in Pokadoodle foundations! The soil is full of nutritious substances. The rain will do the rest ”

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quote:

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Rebel Rumblings on Rockity
Pokadoodle Isle- In an interesting move the Zanark has expanded her reign. The nearby eastern island of Rockity has been colonized by citezens of Pokadoodle. But which citizens?
The Royal Zanark has gathered all known rebels and sent them to Rockity saying "Go, live there, be happy but don't get too cocky or we'll just have to blast you with our...um...pointy hats that shoot lasers." Wise words, oh Zanark. Such eloquence.
The movement of the rebels off Pokadoodle was proposed by Cheif Advisor to the Zanark, Tatiana. Whether or not the move will squash rebellion murmers or only add fuel to the fire, this reporter knows not. From Pokadoodle Palace, I'm Nellie Bly.

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Posted by Carrie (Member # 394) on :
 
[Takes careful notes of the goings-on, so as to preserve them for posteriors. Oh, and posterity.]
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I'd use my rippling biceps to pound searing hot metal into nails, jewelry, and other needed blacksmith materials.

Plus I'd help to populate your new country.

After all, if you've read First Meetings you would know that the most valuable resource is the womb.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Wait, is this an advanced or medieval country?

And AoD, may I be your king, or at least one of your many consorts?

[ February 01, 2006, 12:14 AM: Message edited by: Advent 115 ]
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Advent 115:
Wait, is this an advanced or medieval country?

And AoD, may I be your king, or at least one of your many consorts?

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quote:

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I post yet again in this thread because NFL's passing has still not sunk in. I still cannot believe it...There isn't much I can do for him or his family, but I can say that he will be remembered in the Pokadoodle history books for all eternity as the Bringer of Enlightment and Thought. There are plans to erect a statue or memorial in his name. In fact, the New Found Logic Institute will be created in his name. The NFLI shall serve to further knowledge by establishing museums of all sorts throughout all of Pokadoodle.


I will always miss you, New Found Logic. We all will. If I knew where you were resting, I'd take you flowers. No matter where you are now, you are still a Hatracker. You will always be.

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quote:

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"Go, live there, be happy but don't get too cocky or we'll just have to blast you with our...um...pointy hats that shoot lasers."

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Dan_raven United Metropolitan Building Corp, or the big D.U.M.B Corp as its known, (nyse--Dumb!) is having a sale on "pointy hats that shoot lasers." By 3, get a cute ragamuffin fluffy animal/grenade for free.

Offer not valid in Rockity, Eastern Ebola, or parts of southern Utah.
 

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Posted by ElJay (Member # 6358) on :
 
Thanks for moving it, Alt. I think it's just fine to have it here, and like Dag said, the last paragraph would be fine in the other thread as well.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
So does that mean that my mighty biceps will not be needed for blacksmith work?

Though I am happy about being the FIRST IMPERIAL CONSORT TO THE ZANARK!!!!!


p.s. Don't worry my Queen, I will never betray your trust.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Advent 115:
So does that mean that my mighty biceps will not be needed for blacksmith work?

Though I am happy about being the FIRST IMPERIAL CONSORT TO THE ZANARK!!!!!


p.s. Don't worry my Queen, I will never betray your trust.

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quote:

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Originally posted by ElJay:
Thanks for moving it, Alt. I think it's just fine to have it here, and like Dag said, the last paragraph would be fine in the other thread as well.

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I was dubious about posting it on the other thread as I expected reaction much like yours. The NFLI is something like the Smithsonian over in the real world, FYI.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I have built for you a giant statue made of Platnium and gems in your image.

I shall begin construction on shrines in your image, so that all may bow their heads to the floor before you on each new day.


I bow myself before you oh divine one.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I have completed your tiara my Queen, it is addorned with jewels of the highest quality and guilded in Platnium.

I have formed its curves to match the exquisite curves of your own divine form my Queen.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Advent 115:
I have built for you a giant statue made of Platnium and gems in your image.

I shall begin construction on shrines in your image, so that all may bow their heads to the floor before you on each new day.


I bow myself before you my emperess.

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Aww. *touched*
I'm very flattered that you have chosen to do such things for me, dear consort. You are also given the assignment of making a statue and memorial for NFL to be built in the gardens of the NFLI.


The Zanark would like to know something...who is in charge of monetary records and such? We don't even have an official currency yet...Should anyone apply for the position, I'd like to inform you that the currency used in Pokadoodle shall be the Pokadilly. Spacebucks, Visa, Mastercard, and pencil shavings are legal tender too.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I suggest that all currency bear your devine image.

And I shall begin construction at once on the Memorial to the NFL.

Are there any other tasks you would set upon your most humble servent?
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by Advent 115:
I suggest that all currency bear your devine image.

And I shall begin construction at once on the Memorial to the NFL.

Are there any other tasks you would set upon your most humble servent?

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I'd just like to clear things up a little, with NFL, I meant New Found Logic, not the Football League.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
But of course devine one, I pay close attention to all your devine words.

I have completed enough shrines so that every home in your empire may have one, so that all may bow their heads to the floor before your devine image.


And devine one, may your subjects see an image (photo) of you, or are we unworthy to see your true form. As it would blind us with its beauty.
 

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Posted by Raventhief (Member # 9002) on :
 
*parodies prostrating people then begins to juggle eggs*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I have completed the statue to the New Found Logic Memorial. Behind its visage their are thousands of crying Comp users set in stone.

I bow before you divine one.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I am most grateful for your loyalty and services, Advent. I shall see you in my quarters this evening.
The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by Raventhief (Member # 9002) on :
 
*drops an egg on own head*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*Springs to attention*

Yes my queen! At what time will you be requiring my.... services.

*flexes his arms and smiles*
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 


6PM sharp.

EDIT: That would be 6 PM, Pokadoodle Standard Time, or PST (Pacific).
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I'm on my way now, oh Godess of the New World.
*flexes muscles as he speaks*

And are there any other tasks you would set before your loyal concubine.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
At the moment, there are no more tasks at hand for you, dear consort.

EDIT: I don't want you tired when we meet.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Oh, I won't be my queen. I won't be.

All hail your divine form.
*cracks a mischievous grin*
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Well, I'm off to the mall, I need to ship something. I'll wear my lolita dress and parasol, people stare at me when I do...But I like it anyway.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
You could walk through the streets wearing nothing but your own skin and your subjects would still respect you.

But I defer to your judgement,seeing as how all truth, beauty, and wisdom flows from your divine form.

*lowers himself to a kneeling postion and bows his head to the floor before her feet*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
After a bit of thought, I'll pay for the wedding if I'm choosen as your King. Oh, and add to it the fact that AoD will gain a strong, just, and worthy mate.

So why don't you just skip to picking me, after all no one else has even tried to be your consort or your worthy companion.


*thinking to himself* "Not that she won't choose me anyway after tonight's meeting in her quarters"
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 


Oh dear consort, we shall see if indeed you are indeed what you say. It's almost time!

I am worried at the thought that no one else is participating as much as they used to though.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Do not fear holy one, it is only because I sent them away so that we may be alone.
*mischievous grin*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Hmmm, now to wait for the queen.....


Where the heck is she!!! Her golden god awaits her.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
She's been around the place, wandering around while you made your appearance.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I've been waiting for you my godess. Shall I begin? And what would you like me to do first?

For I shall mold myself to your whim.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Let's go to my private quarters:
AIM= vianeygpe
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
As you command my queen...
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
*is waiting, I'm just invisible, try IMing me*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
How?
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I'll have to do it some other time then, because I got to run at the moment. The real life needs me ASAP!
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Come back! *reaches a shading hand into thin air*

I'll get instant messaging!
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Come back, I figured out how to work my AIM!!!!


Come back!!!!
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
*Sounds trumpet, several times.*
Nobody dare disturb this private episode!
*Sounds trumpet, several times, then leaves.*
 

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Posted by oolung (Member # 8995) on :
 
I will dare! For I have a question of uttmost importance (oh, great Zarak!)

Uhm... can I be the hotdog-seller?

In my spare time, I can also act as your special security force and exterminate all your enemies Traitors, beware!
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
oolung, you are charged with providing the necessary provisions to those in need of hot dog goodness. You may be my body guard as well, it's a great combination I must say. Your only requierment as memeber of the "Zanarkical Secret Service" is to wear a suit and sun glasses, the ear phone thingy with the wire ('cause it's cool) and you must do a body guard pose when I snap my fingers.

The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by oolung (Member # 8995) on :
 
Right you are!
I hear and obey you, mistress.
<puts on a suit and sun glasses>

I'll just have to stack all the hotdogs into my pockets while doing the body guard pose.
Hmmm, I could also devise some sort of clever weapon hidden in hotdogs, that would be handy...
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I have returned from the East with news that Tante is planning another rebelion, but fear not holy one, I will guard your divine form with my life.
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
Sumitpo communicate (pending M&MC clearance):

"In view of the last high-level summit that took place in the Palace, I’ve consulted the stars for a roughly nine-months forecast. The auspices are favourable! Great joy will come upon Pokadoodle, soon enough."
-end of communicate-

A.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Hmmm, what do you believe this could mean suminon?
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
Well, it could mean anything, as long as there is no Official Calendar (nor Official Keeper of one) appointed...

Yet, the Total Eclipse that I foresee is indubitably a sign of something important.

the Sumitpo, A.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Hmmmmm, this is something that should be further examined. Perhaps you could take on thiss task so that when the Zanark returns she could know of this events meaning. I am sure she would reward you for your loyal servitude.
 

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Posted by Nellie Bly (Member # 9129) on :
 

quote:

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Originally posted by suminonA:
Sumitpo communicate (pending M&MC clearance):

"In view of the last high-level summit that took place in the Palace, I’ve consulted the stars for a roughly nine-months forecast. The auspices are favourable! Great joy will come upon Pokadoodle, soon enough."
-end of communicate-

A.

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quote:

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Originally posted by Advent 115:
Hmmmmm, this is something that should be further examined. Perhaps you could take on thiss task so that when the Zanark returns she could know of this events meaning.

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Yes, it is quite a serious matter, and this “puzzle” cannot be solved without the participation of our beloved Zanark. And I insist on the Official Calendar issue. Why?
Simple: as you have all noticed, the Pokadoodle civilisation is already so great that the Sun never sets on it. (Remember the ancient British Empire? )
Other than explaining the complaints we receive continuously from the rest of the smallest civilisations on the other side of the world, this also leaves us without a working definition of eternity / eons / centuries / decades / years / months / seasons / weeks / days / hours / minutes / second / milisecons / microseconds / nanoseconds / picoseconds / femtoseconds / etc
This way, for all I know, it might have passed an eternity already since the birth of Pokadoodle civilisation! Although I doubt it.

I don’t want to be (too) blunt, but I cannot accept the position of Official Keeper of the Calendar, my ignorance on the workings of the time-space continuum of the Pokadoodle makes it impossible for me. Plus, I reckon it would be a full time ( ) job, and I already am too optimist for that.

The official Sumitpo.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Does that mean that we all have awsome tans? If so then woooho!

Perhaps the reason we have no sense of time is because time does not affect our grand kingdom. After all, the Divine Zanarch is an Immortal Godess.


I bow myself before the divine one.


p.s. I don't want to be time keeper. Being a royal consort/blacksmith/leader of poulation control is already enough for me.
 

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Posted by Reticulum (Member # 8776) on :
 
So, what's this about?
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
hi. i am new to hatrack. i am a long time reader, and thought this would be a good time to start. this looks like a pretty funny post, so i though i might join. anyways, here is what i want to do.

could i be the HOSEM?

The head of space exploration and militarization.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Welcome Mogol to the kingdom where the sun never sets. Which is why we all have such great tans. I am sure the divine one will gladly welcome you as well.

May her holiness be praised.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
okay then...that was...weird. so, who the your "holiness"
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
The divine Zanarch both created this kingdom and rules it with her divine wisdom and beauty. Worship her, for she is perfection.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
right then...why do you keep talking like that?
it's kind of creepy.

well, when will "ZANARK" respond to confirm?
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I speak only the truth. Her divine form must be worshiped for she is all that is wise, just, and beautiful in this place. And the divine one answers when she chooses to. And whenever that is it is good enough for her loyal servants.


*bows to her statue*
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
alright then, i guess i'm going to play along.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Who is playing? I always speak the truth about the divine one.

*bows to her statue*
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Sorry I took so long to reply, I was out in the world working hard on hard work.
Space Mogol, your application is accepted. BTW Advent, don't bow to my statue, it is just an image of myself, not me. Stand up. Arise my consort, and instead pay homage to me, your Zanark.

The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*bows head to floor before the Zanarchs feet* I shall obey you most glorious and divine one.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Oh dear, get up. We must gather my councelors to plan for the future of Pokadoodle!
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
I proclaim myself Head of the State Church and chief spiritual advisor to Our Jewel, She Who Shall Be Adored, She Who Shall Never Die. I prostate (er, prostrate) myself in thy service, willing (though humble) to shoulder the burdens of the kingdom if ever She (and the dolts, er, minions beneath her) shall leave our presence.

I begin my shadowy backhanded plots to usurp, er, I begin my upfront loyal counsel to bring faith to the faithless and guidance to She Who Needs No Guidance. I vow never to dabble in treaties with those who might want to, shall we say, redirect Our Jewel's power structure to something less, shall we say, centralized in Her favor.

Call me Father Silvania of the First Church of Pokadoodle. Services begin prompty at ten o'clock, and please make sure to wear purple. Chickens are not allowed, though goats are welcome.

[ February 10, 2006, 03:12 PM: Message edited by: estavares ]
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
.....I do not trust this estavares my Zanarch. And how dare he attempt to userp your power. I suggest that a council of choosen wise men and women would be advisable, but at any time you can overthrough there decisions at any time you so choose. Thus establishing a small amount of order while your divine presence is absent from our lives here in Pokadoodle.


Thus asks your loyal concubine.
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
Advent (I use true names here, My Worship) seeks to undermine the church and your solemn faith by presuming evil where there is none. So saith the Book of Fates, Chapter 7, verses 12 and 13:

"Thus a concubine, wreathed in robes of righteousness, speaketh poison like honey ... She will call evil good and good evil, and shall speak lies, and whoredoms, and corruptions, and shall presume councils when only fire and water shall prevail."

I am always your humble servant, Silvania, using the moniker estavares which stands for Erstwhile Student and Teacher Advocating Verity, Assurance, Righteousness and Esckews Sin.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
My sire, I the HOSEM, do hereby request a monthly budget from Pookadoodle's exponentially growing economy, of GDP $23 Trillion. This sum, for this month, would be $650 Billion dollars, and here I will outline where it will go to.


Space: Developement of new space vehicle called the LSLPV (Light Speed Launch Projection Vehicle) This would cost $350 Billion.

$100 Billion dollars for 150 astronauts.

$50 Billion to keep up the government of this agency, and add 150,000 more troops to the military.

$25 Billion for extensive research into colonizing other worlds

$25 Billion to add science education in schools.

Well sire? Accoriding to current estimates the military stands at 2.8 Million active personel, and 1.6 Million in resevres, with a total of 4.4 Million troops. Unrivaled by any. Crafts and vehicles stand at 3.2 Million.


...


$100 Billion: Other

[ February 10, 2006, 09:52 PM: Message edited by: Space Mogol ]
 

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Posted by aiua (Member # 7825) on :
 
It seems as though you have no refugees.
I humbly beg of you, Your Highness, to take pity on this poor shipwrecked sailor and allow her to live out her days in a small hut on a cliff on the western face of your island where I may putter about in my vegetable garden and impart bits of wisdom on the lovestuck younglings.
You may call me THE HERMIT, if you so desire.

*bows and waits for Her Highness*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by estavares:
Advent (I use true names here, My Worship) seeks to undermine the church and your solemn faith by presuming evil where there is none. So saith the Book of Fates, Chapter 7, verses 12 and 13:

"Thus a concubine, wreathed in robes of righteousness, speaketh poison like honey ... She will call evil good and good evil, and shall speak lies, and whoredoms, and corruptions, and shall presume councils when only fire and water shall prevail."

I am always your humble servant, Silvania, using the moniker estavares which stands for Erstwhile Student and Teacher Advocating Verity, Assurance, Righteousness and Esckews Sin.

---

How dare you question my undying affection for the Zanarch?!

I would die to protect her divine form! So how is it that you who are so new to the ways of her land dare to question the faith of her most loyal servant!
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Zanark, with your permission, I say we send a brigade of troops to expell estavares, and install someone else in his place. I need confirmation on my budget...
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Space Mogol, thy budget is approved. However, I DO wish to see some results. I hope to see Pokamonthly reports on your research and discoveries.

Auia, unless you show me your VISA, I must deny you entry into Pokadoodle.


Just kidding. Actually, I am rejecting your request.

That is because you will not live in a hut but a crystal palace by the sea where you shall be provided a library with all the books, arts, crafts and activites you ever wanted to enjoy.

*whisper whisper* As for you Advent, see to it that you spy on our Head of Church since I do not trust him. Gain his trust, become his friend. If need be, sleep with him , but find out everything t there is to know about him.

EDIT: The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
My Zanarch, I request your hand in Pokadoodle marriage. May I be your man, now and forever here in this land that you forged with your beauty?

Will you be my queen? And I your loyal king? *closest I could come to kneeling*
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
I second! Advent will be a wonderous king!
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
My dear Advent, did we not have this discussion before?
Besides, you must make the mood! You can't just pop out and ask for my hand in marriage without setting a romantic environment first. Not even a flower? :'(
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Well divine one you would not respond to you IM so I was forced to take desperate messures.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Awww. I'll sign on then, but only for a little while since I must wake up on the morrow at 8:30am for work. It's already 11pm over here.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
And I shall bring you every jewel and rose in the land if you so ask it of me. I will rip the moon itself from the heavens if it will please you.

Just say that you will alow me this honor of being by your side til' the end of my days.
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
STOP!

My Jewel, Oh Wonderous One, why would you spoil your purity by the demonic touch of "he who would destroy you." I strongly recommend a round of confession and a month of prayer at the Sacred Heart of Our Holy Frog to purge your mortal lusts.

Our Grace is beyond marriage, beyond all ties that bind Her. Thou art married to the 12 Gods, and your people, and your Church, Oh Precious One. An unholy union with a commoner will only lead to your grief and unhappiness...

While you're on sabbactical, My Jewel, I am more than happy to shoulder the burdens of your office while you are away.

(Insert innocent grin, with appropriately bowed head.)
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
(Signs treaty with nearby nation...)
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
My Zanark, we have just discovered how travel at the speed of light, and the LSLPV is complete. We are now launching a crew to Alpha Centauri.

We created the product and had $75 Billion left over.

We trained $150 astronauts for for $103 Billion.

We added 220,000 troops to the service, and have a total of 3.22 Million active troops.

Colonizing other world's bugdget was used accordingly.


In total, we have $115 Billion left, and request another $750 Billion, so that we can build the ultimae telescope.


The Other fund was used accoringly, and request another $50 Billion.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
I henceforth motion that eztavarez be expelled for 5 months to be put on trial for doubt in the Queen's insight, and signing treaties with other nations without consent of the Zanark.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I approve of that Space Mogol. Not to mention the fact that he is completely ignoring the fact that the line of succession follows Nellie Bly.
The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
What about my new budget?
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I approve of that too since our current Pokadoolian treasury holds over a googolplex dollars.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Excellent.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by estavares:
STOP!

My Jewel, Oh Wonderous One, why would you spoil your purity by the demonic touch of "he who would destroy you." I strongly recommend a round of confession and a month of prayer at the Sacred Heart of Our Holy Frog to purge your mortal lusts.

Our Grace is beyond marriage, beyond all ties that bind Her. Thou art married to the 12 Gods, and your people, and your Church, Oh Precious One. An unholy union with a commoner will only lead to your grief and unhappiness...

While you're on sabbactical, My Jewel, I am more than happy to shoulder the burdens of your office while you are away.

(Insert innocent grin, with appropriately bowed head.)

---

For this insult to my honor I would gladly forge the blade that will cut of your wicked head when the Zanarch find you guilty of high Treason to the great empire of Pokadoodle. I will swing the blade myself if she so asks.

You went too far when you questioned the honor and loyalty of a blacksmith. I do so hope that your punishment fits your wicked deeds.

And why would the Zanarch need a confesional? She needs no false prophet to tell her lies about her own heart, one does not need such things when one is a god such as she.

I bow myself before her wisdom and judgement, may her wrath come down upon you swiftly.
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
I see Our Jewel listens to the lies of commoners and follows her sinful lusts. I am beguinning to wonder if she is as the scripture foretold, from the Book of Platypus, Chapter 2 verses 67-69:

"And woe when thy creation shalt bridge the endless gulf beyond the heavens, and those who pound metal with their fists are esteemed of greater worth than thy holy prophets ... then shalt the great day of Frog and Tagog dawn, and a holier hand shall arise from the East, and––"

(activates hidden switch behind throne.)

"--Your messenger shall expunge the wicked from thy SIGHT!"

(throws vial to ground, cloud of smoke rises, and I slip unnoticed into a series of underground tunnels and my awatiing submersible docked in the sea cave the engineers forgot to mention to Her Majesty.)
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
*send a force of 10,000 troops, 1,000 tanks, and 500 war planes to capture estavares. He is captured, and now stands trial awaiting jurisdiction from the Zanark*
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
Letter arrives, via Zanark Express, or "ZEx":

"May it be known that the Empire of Fitzwiggle, and its herald Emperor Snarg, declares jihad upon you, oh fragile Zanark.

"For offences too numerous to mention here, I hereby declare your kingdom annexed, and demand you surrender all arms (both weapons or war and those attached to fingers) immediately.

"If not, then may Frog have mercy on your soul."

Smoochies,

Emperor Snarg of Fitzwiggle
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
*Guards are found slain, as security codes all over the city have been breached, and Snarg's troops have infiltrated every level. One is even using Her Majesty's bathtub and rubber duckie, while another is making a sandwich in Her Worship's private kitchen.*
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Sire, to defend our great nation, with or without your permission, I am sending 8 nuclear weapons to destroy Fitzwiggle's main cities, and government.


*sees huge plume from across the world*

The Miilitary of Pokadoodle, does henceforth annex, the nation of Fitzwiggle, and demand total surrender.
 

---

Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Now that the nation of Fitzwiggle is utterly destroyed, we henceforth sentence Estavares to death by ducking.
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
Investigators who assess the damage find no bodies and, in fact, realize they bombed a bird sanctuary.

Meanwhile, droves of Pokadoodle's citizens turn purple and drop dead, and scientists learn its food and water supply has been poisoned at the source. Soon the streets are Pokadoodle are heaped with the bodies of the dead or dying, and, having been fasting during his ordeal, Father Silvania simply walks out of the brig where he sat awaiting trial.

Emperor Snarg, after extensive clean-up, declares the site a new amusement park, "Pokadoodle Adventure," and soon tourists from around the world have come to see the tales of a people once proud, now six feet under.

Greeting tourists is the stuffed body of Her Majesty Zanark, bidding all welcome with help of holographic projection on her face.


 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Hahahaha! The people of Fitzwiggle are delusional, and cannot see that that their nation lays in ruins, and millions and millions are dead. The Zanark sits on her thrown proudly, as 7 more nuclear weapons once more decimate cities, and wipe out the Fitzwigglian population.

Food and water is plenty dirnkable, and the people eat and be marry. Times are well. A force of 2.5 Million troops is sent to all parts of Fitzwiggle and kill every single person, in the nation, including Emperor.

After the people of Fitzwiggle realize that "Pokadoodle Adventure" is actually their capitol city, and that it is actually the emperor of Fitzwiggle, in the bodybag.


There is now way this can be denied, or reversed, as the nation of Fitzwiggle, lies in ruins, and Pokadoodle is merry.
 

---

Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
Nah, I like mine better.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
But it isn't true, for your nation is destroyed and in ruins.
 

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Posted by Carrie (Member # 394) on :
 
*wanders in, takes random notes, wanders out*
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I think it is time I use my "devine powers" to get rid of estevares.
In a flash, she erases estevare's memory and revives both the people of Pokadoodle and Fitzwiggle, who had nothing to do with our silly politics.

For the end of his days, estevares will wander in a retirement home without knowing who he is, who he was, or where the bathroom is.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Did I do well my Zanark? I am sorry about the Nuclear weapons.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
It's alright Space Mogol, it took all my strength, but I've done it.
Everything is the way it was, except for estevares, of course.
The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*bows* Even in our darkest hour our divine ruler shows mercy where before ther was none to be had.

May her wisdom show the people of Fitzwiggle the error of their ways. And may we never trust a false prophet.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Is there anything that I can do to support you in your time of need divine one?
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Thank you for your forgiveness my Zanark. I believe that do to the fact that I saved the country, and annhilated our enemies when you were gone, I am in line for a special medal. Of course, only if you believe I deserve one...
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
My divine one, may I cosole you on IM?

I bow myself to your whim.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Special ceremonies, I hadn't thought of those.
Let's make it a la star wars where you get your medal and I'm wearing an awsome dress and there are songs playing and soldiers standing and parades and such. Kinda like in Phantom Menace.


"I hereby award you, Space Mogol, for spectacular military leadership in the war of the false prophet.
Advent, I'm on stealth mode in AIM, go ahead and send me a message.
 

---

Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Thank you my Zanark. Hopefully this will be first of many. What is the title of this medal?
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
The medal of honor for outstanding service to the military and exceptional courage.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I have constructed a memorial to this tragic event, though you returned many to life many still suffered. The memorial thall have a grand fountain of your image standing over the bodies of those who fell as great tears fall from your eyes as you look down upon the sins of your world.

A single quote from the Zanrachs own words stands upon the surface of the marble fountain, it says "Why do my children make war when all my heart wishes for is peace?"
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
May we always remember what her holiness sacrificed for our sins. May we never take solace in a false prophet again, for we have seen the tragedies of war.

We have caused our godess much pain, she still weeps for those who suffered from this war. So let us never take arms against anyone ever again in her name or any others, for we are a nation at peace with all.
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
(Wanders aimlessly, urinates in Her Majesty's drinking fountain.)

"...Will...get...my...revenge...on blasted..." (Walks into wall, tumbles down steps.) "What was I talking about again?"

(All followers of the Great Church are furious at Her Majesty's bias and allowing minions to make decisions for her. The country's morale takes a big drop, holiday shopping hits an all time low, Family Values erode, many "Must See TV" sitcoms lose ratings and the networks resort to Reality TV.)

Mwa ha ha ha!

(Falls down stairs again.)
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*Grabs estavares by his throat, lifts him off the ground* Be glad that the Zanarch does not wish you dead, or I would snap your neck like a twig right now *tenses grip ever so slightly*

*walks to retierment home still holding estavares by the throat*

*drops him*

Make sure that he is never left unatended ever again. *walks back to the memorial*

[ February 11, 2006, 09:34 PM: Message edited by: Advent 115 ]
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
*Wonders how one "snapes" someone's neck. Assumes it involves a potion of some kind.*

*Patron demon Veriminspew appears in cloud of black sulphur. Restores Silvania's memory and puts the retirement home guards to sleep, allowing him to wander into the wilderness. In exchange for a plate of brownies, Silvania is granted the gift of slipperiness, so he cannot be found or captured unless desired.*

Note found the next morning:

"I go to preach the peaceable Gospel of Frog. May Frog have mercy on us all."

*Silvania disappears, lost from view...*
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
*sends force of 100,000 troops, and nukes entire area. Knows silvania is dead, because body is found and matches all dental records, blood samples, and other various identity indicators. Twin killed also, and unusually, Silvania is the only casualty, and only damage done. Enough remains to indentify.*

Silvania is dead forever!
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
*casts undoable spell, to make sure silvania never EVER comes back. Ever.*
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
Yikes...I hope you're playing, and not just being a jerk. Goin' a little far to please your lust-monkey, huh?


 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Action well taken, Space Mogol.
As for that Verminspew, I'll take care of him.
*grumble*I've only just revived everyone and people are messing it all up again....
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*pops knuckles* So does that mean that you yet live? If so then I would be glad to rectify that problem for you.

If you ever attempt to cause trouble in the kingdom of Pokadoodle I will personally see to your demise. And Mogol, if he does cause trouble to the kingdom I shall take care of him myself.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Divine one, I request that Estavares be exiled from your blessed kingdom from this point forward. And should he ever return he shall be beheaded for his actions against Pokadoodle.

I bow myself to your judgement in this matter.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Your request will be denied. Estevares shall not be exiled, he shall be turned into a statue that can see and hear what is happening around him, but he will be stiff as stone. He will be placed in a park where children will run and play around, but when he tries to move, he will not be able to. You will yearn for the day when the seal upon you is broken, but that day will never come unless I choose it so. No one but I can break the seal.
The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
Sire, do to this war, technology has seen a boost, and spirits are high and happy. Now would be an excellent time to invest in Space exploration and Militarazation. Currently, we have all of the means, technology, and equipment to send several colonies to Mars, we only need the money.

We request $1.2 Trillion dollars for this term to send the colony, terraform, and other.

The space telescope has been used well, and test scores have increased 3 fold. Overall everythingness, is high.

We have discovered a planet in the Alpha Centauri system, that matches Earth, and probably hold intelligent extra terrestrial life.

We request $5.7 Trillion dollars to send a team there to check it out.


An aditional $200 Billion is requested to build several test military space fighters.


In total, SEM department requests $7.1 Trillion.


All will go well.


What do you say, my Zanark?
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I am not sure that the reserves of Pokadoodle have that much funding......

But we should ask the divine one
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
Oh great Zanark

I, Kagedoz, request from you our great leader to become Head librarian to read all books and be friendly to everyone
also i shall shout quiet every 10 minutes

i also request to be head mathmatician to do all Math findings in which i suddenly stop what i'm doing an write something down on a peice of paper in horrible unreadable handwriting

i also request to be the pessimist to argue every point with Sumitpo to say the worse side of everything

I Request this as your loyal servant
 

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Posted by Space Mogol (Member # 9146) on :
 
I trust you, and suggest to the great Zanark, that he get this post. He is wise.
 

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Posted by clod (Member # 9084) on :
 
*rushes in, cracks egg over head, and cries*

"Your lordships! I bring news!"
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
What news do you bring Clod?
Speak! Don't leave us in suspense!

Kagedoz, thy request is approved.
Advent, do not worry about funding, as I stated before, the treasury holds over a googolplex dollars. Therefore, Space Mogol, I approve your request, as long as I get Pokamonthly reports on this as well.
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
Thank you so much great ruler

Uhh.. i'm sorry for the floor it took so long to approve me that i wrote som calculations on your holy floor

i hope this is ok with your greatness

I will now go read all the books in the great library of Pokadoodle (starts walking out suddenly shout QUIET scaring half the people there)
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Forgive me for not putting my absolute trust in you divine one.

*bows head to the floor*
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
Can I be head of human resources oh Divine and omnipotent one?
 

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Posted by clod (Member # 9084) on :
 
*looks around the variously assembled kneeling and confus-ed*

by what manner should I address you Lord?

*tries to make eye-contact with the Person-In-Charge*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I bow before her holiness for she created all of Pokadoodle and rules with grace and kindness. You may address her as our grand Zanarch.
 

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Posted by clod (Member # 9084) on :
 
Indeed? Thanks, Advert 115.

"By her grace and holiness of the PoonkaDoodle, may I approach?"
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Advent, Zanark is with a K.
As for you, Grim, your request is approved.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I appologize divine one.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Don't apologize, dear. Just learn from thy mistakes.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I shall. I shall.
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
I would like a hundred trillion dollars for research into human cloning, which benefit war and testing purposes. My great Zanark. These soldiers would be brain dead and only know how to fight and listen to there commanders. This would thus eliminate any “human” casualties.


 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
You request is absolutely denied Grim.
You will instead be given 2 billion to fund cyborg research so we make mechanical soldiers instead. That is truly how human casualties will be eliminated.
The Zanark has spoken.
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
Thank you for pointing out my flaw in that plan; I shall do my best to fulfill your request, your humble servant.
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
I have one question. Will these cyborgs be stonger then humans? Because in a revolt, I don't know how we would fare.
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
Just don't give them memory because then they wont revolt
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
Thanks, now my research may commence.May cyborgs march.
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
The cyborgs are done and I turn them over to Space Mogol, so that he may colonize space.
 

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Posted by aiua (Member # 7825) on :
 
Oh, the winds are changing..

<spooky voice> Beware the six fingered men!! </spooky voice>
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
Who are the six fingered men?
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
I would like to ask Grim, did you install a fail-safe device in all the cyborgs?

And perhaps your next project should be nano technology for all of Pokadoodle to benefit from.

We could have instant healing for everything from minor to life threatening injuries.

We could be stronger and faster of both mind and of body. What think you Grim?
 

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Posted by Grim (Member # 9165) on :
 
"What think you>"


:roll:


I think it sounds splendiferous!
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Good, then you should get started.
I am sure that her holiness will be most pleased to see that you are working so hard on improving the lives of everyone in Pokadoodle.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I am most pleased indeed.
One thing I will let you know is that I don't want mistakes. I mean it, I shall not see my people suffer because of negligence from anyone's part. Understood?
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
Great Zanark, thank you for allowing Kagedoz to take the job of the most pessimist of us all I’m sure Kagedoz will bring high quality service to this great Queendom! Using pessimism to improve other’s life is a special ability that only a few ever have. Kagedoz will be triumphant at it!

The Sumitpo.

*bows and retires for another Pokadoodleperiod*
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
No there is no way i can bring high quality service to this queendom

and i will not be triumphant about it

Also i will not...*writes somecomplex mathematical problem on a peice of paper*...Um what was i saying...

QUIET
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
Kagedoz, you really miss the subtle power that you have. It’s not the fact that you think you won’t bring high quality service to this Queendom that is important, but the confidence that you have in that particular belief!
That confidence is one of the great services that you’re bringing forth. You are setting a worthy example!

S.
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
No i am not setting a worthy example

i don't have any subtle powers and i'm not bringing good service to pookadoodle
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
That's the spirit! Go on! You're doing a wonderful job.

Sumitpo.
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
NO I AM NOT DOING A WONDERFUL JOB I AM DOING THE WORST POSSIBLE JOB EVER

Kagedoz
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
If only the others would be as sure of their abilities as you are of yours!

Sumi.

PS: as the Official Sumitpo, I'm sure that you could do a much worse job if you really wanted.
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
ARRGH you are just so wrong in your speak i have nothing to say to it

GOOD DAY
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
How can you be unhappy in Pokadoodle Kagedoz? I mean this place is perfect.

The sun never sets.

The waters are pure and full of fish.

Our land is ruled by a Divine Goddess who rules with justice and kindness.

And we who live in Pokadoodle are rewarded with long happy lives.


So how can you be so angry?
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
Advent, don't worry! Kagedoz is just doing the Pessimist's job, and in a magnific way I might add.

(as for the angry part, don't be fooled, Gekadoz just wished me a GOOD day! )

S.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Ohh, good I would be horrified at the thought that someone could be unhappy in our beautiful land.

Speaking of beautiful, where is the Goddess?
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
She will appear soon enough
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Hmmm, so how is being Pokadoodles happiest individual going for you?
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
*yawn and stretch*
I jsut woke up.
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 

quote:

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Hmmm, so how is being Pokadoodles happiest individual going for you?

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Actually, I'm the most optimistic person in Pokadoolde, by vocation. Happiness and Optimism are not interchangeable. BTW, I’d think that our beloved Zanark is the happiest of us all.

Su.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Good afternoon Goddess.

I hope you slept well.
 

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Posted by Common Man (Member # 9173) on :
 
"Found sprayed on the palace wall:*

quote:

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How can you be unhappy in Pokadoodle Kagedoz? I mean this place is perfect.

The sun never sets.

The waters are pure and full of fish.

Our land is ruled by a Divine Goddess who rules with justice and kindness.

And we who live in Pokadoodle are rewarded with long happy lives.

So how can you be so angry?

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Refuse to listen to the LIES of the FALSE QUEEN and her nespotic minions! She will destroy anyone who is different, who offers new ideas, who believes differently! She allows underlings to spend GAZILLIONS in unholy warmongering!

Viva La Revolution! Defend the PEOPLE's RIGHTS! Down with the brainwashing, the machinations of UNDERLINGS who RULE alongside the FALSE QUEEN!

P.S. Buy 1, get 1 free at Pokadoodle's Pottery Barn!


 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
???

How dare you insult me in such a way!!
Advent, I charge you with taking care of this insolent being!
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
???

How dare you insult me in such a way!!
Advent, I charge you with taking care of this insolent being!
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
How much injury do you wish me to cause to him Goddess? Do you wish me to maim him for life or kill him?

If the later then give me the word and I shall spill his blood with me own two hands. *pops knuckles*

I promised that I would bathe my hands in blood if it would keep you safe, and I stand by that promise now.
 

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Posted by Common Man (Member # 9173) on :
 
YOU CANNOT SILENCE AN ENTIRE NATION!!!!!

Even now, Her Falseness allows toadies to do her dirty work! And she fights opinions with MURDER!

Viva La Revolution!

*Explosion resounds in distance. Military space vehicle plant explodes with total loss.*
 

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Posted by clod (Member # 9084) on :
 
*fashions a table for himself - one suitable for dancing atop*

*sews a seat cushion or two*
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Look, "Common Man", I've just had this whole thing with Esteves. I'm sick of it. If you don't like how I am ruling, then please make your own nation. The people of Pokadoodle are allowed to leave whenever they want to. I just built Pokadoodle and they came on their own free will.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*hand jerks out, grips Common by his throat*

Be glad that the Goddess has shown mercy, because if you return I may not.

*lifts Common off his feet*

*carries Common by the throat all the way to Pokadoodles shores at a slow deliberate pace*

Now, I would advise that you not return if you want to keep your head. The Goddess may spare you, but I shall insure that if you ever come back you will not cause Pokadoodle or the Goddess any harm.

Now leave....

*drops Common to the ground and watches as Common leaves Pokadoodle by boat*
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
What's funny is that you mentioned having bad guys in your first post, now you treat anyone who tries to have some fun with contempt.

Enjoy your little clique...
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
(speaks slowly and deliberatly) Did I or did I not say that you should stay in your rest home estavares.

*pops knuckles* Now you had best get back to your rest home before I do something.... unpleasant to your spine.

Now go home estavares or else. *slams fist into other hand*


Leave.
 

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Posted by Reticulum (Member # 8776) on :
 
*laughs* Because Advent is only minorly horrifying.


Or is he?


:confuses:
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Well I am the local blacksmith here, so I would consider that intimidating.

*pops knuckles* You had better be heading back to your home estavares.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I get your point estevares, but please give us a break. Pokadoodle has just won a legendary war, my people just don't feel like putting up with it for the time being.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
My Goddess, I suggest that a detail of Pokadoodle soldiers be assigned to make sure estavares stays in his rest home at all times.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Your suggestion is appreciated, Advent. General, assign two soldiers to supervise estevares constantly.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
It is good to see you well Goddess.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I just came back from fulfilling my grueling role in society as a cashier.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*bows* Goddess, is there anything I can do to serve you?

I await your command.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I need reports on how each department is doing.
 

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Posted by Nellie Bly (Member # 9129) on :
 
Your Zanarkship--
I have returned from my ambassadoring to our neighboring lands, where things are quite unsettled. Our neighbors are concerned with the turmoil brewing within our waring nation. We are young, but look at all the damage that has been done by Pokadoodle, that which started out so peaceful, so serene, is now on the brink of becoming volitile. Fear not Zanark, for I know that we can rectify this situation. I call for an emergency meeting of the councel and invite all citizens of Pokadoodle, and Pokadoodle territories to attend. A restructuring of our government is in desperate need. Rest assure, no power will be taken from you, Lady. We simply need to establish a working constitution. If we cannot soon rectify our situation, our older, more powerful neighbors will surely take matters into their own hands.
 

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Posted by suminonA (Member # 8757) on :
 
Sumitpo Official Report:

I was working lately on some extended study for a long term forecast, but then I realized that there is no time (Pokadoodletime-wise) for it. The fact that the Sun never sets on this great Queendom actually means that we are “trapped” in the present. Surely the past and the future exist, but this Queendom is timeless, so any forecast is meaningless. That’s just fine too ‘cause we do live a single (extended) moment anyways (the timeless now).

I’ll keep being the most optimistic around, but I’ll stop any forecasting activity until there is a good time for it.

*End of report*


The Official Sumitpo.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
As Head of Population Control, I would like to report that there have been over 200 births in Pokadoodle since its creation. So It is in my opinion that our population is booming (considering how few citizens we had to begin with). But I am concerned about the number of refugees that are washing ashore everyday since the end of our war with the "Prophet". I am recomending that special provisions be made so that these refugees may create their own town within the borders of Pokadoodle.

They will be required to:

1) Provide Pokadoodle with soldiers should ever the need arise
2) Pay a monthly tribute of one quarter of their grain to Pokadoodle in return for farming on Pokadoodle lands

If anyone on the Pokadoodle council has anything they would like to add I am more than willing to accomodate, but her Holiness must approve these actions first.

All praise her majesty.
 

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Posted by SteveRogers (Member # 7130) on :
 
Look! Its the Frankenstein monster!
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Hmm, I wasn't aware that we had any monsters on Pokadoodle other than estavares...
 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
Hey!

I am MORE than happy to start pissing you off again with more rebellious posts if you make this personal.

(Oh wait, you already have.)


 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Did I not warn you to stay in your Retierment home or I would personally snap your vertebre with my bare hands?

(and you are a monster, I haven't noticed anyone else trying to start wars in peaceful threads)

So go back home or else. *pops knuckles*

(steady low voice) Now.
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 

 

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Posted by estavares (Member # 7170) on :
 
What's funny is that I never started the war. If you look back, I started a character that was a bit of a cliché (with a wink and a giggle) but could have some fun, and you guys tried to kill me. So I took it to the next level.

You may find you can attract more people to play along if you treat others kindly, rather than act like a high school clique that shoves people out because they dress differently than you do.

The people will tolerate a dictator only so long...
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Be silent you worm. This is a civilization that does not need war or little worms like you.

And I shall stand watch to make sure that it stays that way. None shall ever challenge the wisdom of the Goddess.
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
So far as head librabian i have catalogged all of our book, made a website for a library where you can see all cool news. Also you have the ability to check out books over our website in either online of print format. Also we have set up a pookadoodle publishing cooperation just in case any authors arise omong the pookadoodlians

As head mathmatician i have discovered a new type of mathematics which we haven't had the chance to name yet. the other mathmeticians and I are still trying to discover all about this new type of mathematics. (Oh and to take it off our minds, oh great Zanark, can you please decide on a name for this new type of mathematics.)

As the most pessimistic person in pookadoodle i have to say that our government has been roling down hill like a snowball and there is no chance of ever recovering WE'RE DOOMED

Thank You
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
Oww..my head....

The new name for this new math shall be...Pokatisticamathics.

*oww...Takes an aspirin...
 

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Posted by Geekazoid99 (Member # 8254) on :
 
Oh Thank you

can we call it Pokamatics for short

thank you oh gracious one
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*worried look* Are you alright Goddess? Do you need anything?
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
I'm ok, I just get headaches when I'm too tired.
 

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Posted by Nellie Bly (Member # 9129) on :
 
Oh Zanark? About our coucil meeting? Your approval is required before we can commence. Our older neighbors are getting impatient....
 

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Posted by Nellie Bly (Member # 9129) on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Nellie Bly:
Your Zanarkship--
I have returned from my ambassadoring to our neighboring lands, where things are quite unsettled. Our neighbors are concerned with the turmoil brewing within our waring nation. We are young, but look at all the damage that has been done by Pokadoodle, that which started out so peaceful, so serene, is now on the brink of becoming volitile. Fear not Zanark, for I know that we can rectify this situation. I call for an emergency meeting of the councel and invite all citizens of Pokadoodle, and Pokadoodle territories to attend. A restructuring of our government is in desperate need. Rest assure, no power will be taken from you, Lady. We simply need to establish a working constitution. If we cannot soon rectify our situation, our older, more powerful neighbors will surely take matters into their own hands.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Advent 115:
Hmm, I don't think Pokadoodle has one of those.


What would you do as the town lunatic?

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quote:

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Originally posted by Common Man:
The people are hungry. Please, have mercy...

*Swarms of flies buzz about. The air is redolent with filth.*

---

Are you kidding? Pokadoodle has rich never ending fields filled with fruit and the grasslands and woods filled with animals that are strong and willing to give their lives so that we might live. The people of Pokadoodle are well fed but not fat, and we all have nice tans due to the fact that the sun never sets on our land.

So stop complaining.

And whats wrong with me using my blacksmith biceps to frighten away all who would harm Pokadoodle? I do what needs to be done and nothing more. I only act because we have no other system to protect the kingdom of Pokadoodle.

And I have sworn my life to guarding her Holiness and her kingdom. *places hand over heart*

May her Holiness be praised for all she hath givin unto us.
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
*flexes muscules, enemies of Pokadoodle run in fear*
 

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Posted by Advent 115 (Member # 8914) on :
 
Welcome one and all to the greatest civilization on the nets!
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 
The Zanark calls in sick today.

I'm sure Nellie Bly will take command while I'm gone. That is her job anyway,
 

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Posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion (Member # 6473) on :
 

quote:

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As the tumble weeds roll by...It is a time of desolation, chaos and uncertainty. Brother pitted against brother; babies havin' babies.

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