FacebookTwitter
Hatrack River Forum   
my profile login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » You want what?!?

   
Author Topic: You want what?!?
dkw
Member
Member # 3264

 - posted      Profile for dkw   Email dkw         Edit/Delete Post 
The kids in the church afterschool program have petitioned to be allowed to memorize Bible verses and recite them each week. It seems that their friends who attend the Evangelical church memorize verses, and they don’t think it’s fair that they don’t get to.

In my effort to be an understanding and responsive pastor, I have yielded to their pleas and assigned them each a verse to memorize for next week. [ROFL]

Yesterday was one of those days when I really love my job. [Big Grin]

Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Farmgirl
Member
Member # 5567

 - posted      Profile for Farmgirl   Email Farmgirl         Edit/Delete Post 
This was SO precious! I had to tell my sister about it as soon as you posted.

Every pastor's dream!

Farmgirl

Posts: 9538 | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Anna
Member
Member # 2582

 - posted      Profile for Anna           Edit/Delete Post 
[ROFL]
Posts: 3526 | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

 - posted      Profile for Bob_Scopatz   Email Bob_Scopatz         Edit/Delete Post 
This is the second thing this week that has reminded me of Tom Sawyer. Remember the scene where he gets a bunch of tickets and "earns" a Bible? LOL.

I'm having a bit of trouble imagining the kids' conversation in this case.

"Hey, c'mon, let's memorize Bible verses...It's cool!"

"You mean you DON'T get to memorize verses? You poor thing."

[Big Grin]

I'll stick my neck out here and say I sort of hope that the kids actually learn something about the verses -- context seems especially important to me the older I get -- or rather the more times I read the Bible.

But then, I never went through the "verse memorization" training.

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
katharina
Member
Member # 827

 - posted      Profile for katharina   Email katharina         Edit/Delete Post 
*wants to read Tom Sawyer again* Now where'd I put that?
Posts: 26077 | Registered: Mar 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
zgator
Member
Member # 3833

 - posted      Profile for zgator   Email zgator         Edit/Delete Post 
That could be your whole problem Bob. I suggest starting with John 11:35.
Posts: 4625 | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
dkw
Member
Member # 3264

 - posted      Profile for dkw   Email dkw         Edit/Delete Post 
*snicker*
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Shan
Member
Member # 4550

 - posted      Profile for Shan           Edit/Delete Post 
Speaking of Bible verses, I stumbled across Colossians 4: 5-6 the night before I had to go and soothe ruffled feathers and rebuild smashed bridges with some anxious, frightened and (in many cases, justifiably) upset contractors.

Context is important!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Mr.Funny
Member
Member # 4467

 - posted      Profile for Mr.Funny           Edit/Delete Post 
Best verse to start with (NIV): Job 3:2 : "He said;"
[Big Grin]

Posts: 1466 | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Belle
Member
Member # 2314

 - posted      Profile for Belle   Email Belle         Edit/Delete Post 
I told our Children's ministry director about that tonight, and she said "So, if we tell them they don't get to do it anymore, maybe ours will want to? Let's try it!"

[ROFL]

Posts: 14428 | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
katharina
Member
Member # 827

 - posted      Profile for katharina   Email katharina         Edit/Delete Post 
Favorite unintentionally-funny NT scriptures: John 20:2-4.

And on the way to discover the joyous news...

[ February 18, 2004, 10:06 PM: Message edited by: katharina ]

Posts: 26077 | Registered: Mar 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

 - posted      Profile for Bob_Scopatz   Email Bob_Scopatz         Edit/Delete Post 
John 11:35 Jesus wept.

I just learned about that in Barbershop 2.

I like it. Short. Easy to memorize. Thanks Zan.

Job 3:2 "He said." Is also very short. But if taken out of context...dangerous!

[Razz]

Heck, I memorized TWO verses today!

[Big Grin]

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Audeo
Member
Member # 5130

 - posted      Profile for Audeo   Email Audeo         Edit/Delete Post 
As a kid I always wanted to memorize biblical passages in Latin. I was very upset to learn that the Catholic church no longer does mass in Latin. I had to settle for my current minorin Classical studies.
Posts: 349 | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
dkw
Member
Member # 3264

 - posted      Profile for dkw   Email dkw         Edit/Delete Post 
To completely contradict Zan and Mr. Funny, next week I could assign Esther 8:9.
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

 - posted      Profile for Bob_Scopatz   Email Bob_Scopatz         Edit/Delete Post 
Jesus wept. So did Julio.

Ester 8:9 " 9Then at that time, on the twenty-third day of the third month, which is the month Sivan, the king's scribes were sent for; and everything ordered by Mordecai was put in writing and sent to the Jews and the captains and the rulers and the chiefs of all the divisions of the kingdom from India to Ethiopia, a hundred and twenty-seven divisions, to every division in the writing commonly used there, and to every people in their language, and to the Jews in their writing and their language."

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
dkw
Member
Member # 3264

 - posted      Profile for dkw   Email dkw         Edit/Delete Post 
Longest verse in the Bible.

Or there's Daniel 4:37, the only verse with all the letters of the alphabet except Q.

Edit: Drat, I think that's only true in the KJV, and we're using NRSV.

[ February 18, 2004, 10:47 PM: Message edited by: dkw ]

Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

 - posted      Profile for Bob_Scopatz   Email Bob_Scopatz         Edit/Delete Post 
Wow, I'm learning so much! Is there a bible verse that's a palindrome??? [Big Grin]

Here's my favorite:

Proverbs 20:30 By the wounds of the rod evil is taken away, and blows make clean the deepest parts of the body.

You could have a whole parish full of kids practicing self-mortification if you play this right.

Bible verses? BIBLE VERSES!!!! I'll give you Bible verses!!!

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
rivka
Member
Member # 4859

 - posted      Profile for rivka   Email rivka         Edit/Delete Post 
Certainly, Bob.

"Madam, I'm Adam."

Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

 - posted      Profile for Bob_Scopatz   Email Bob_Scopatz         Edit/Delete Post 
[ROFL]

Here's a great bargain:

Psalm 107:8,15, 21, 31

Learn one, you've learned 'em all.

More fun facts:

The Bible was divided into chapters by Cardinal Hugo in 1250.

The New Testament was divided into verses by Sir Robert Stephens in 1551.

The whole Bible, divided into chapters and verses, first appeared in 1560 in what is known as the "Geneva Bible." It was so called because it was prepared by the Reformers in Geneva. It is also called the "Breeches Bible," because Genesis 3:7 is translated: "They sewed fig leaves together and made themselves breeches."

Once more into the breech.

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
rivka
Member
Member # 4859

 - posted      Profile for rivka   Email rivka         Edit/Delete Post 
Interestingly, Esther 8:9 is the longest verse in Hebrew as well, AND contains the longest word (11 letters) in Tanach.
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Belle
Member
Member # 2314

 - posted      Profile for Belle   Email Belle         Edit/Delete Post 
Then there's the fun combination of Rev. 3:20 and Gen. 3:10

That's a joke my pastor told, I'm sure dkw has heard it before. The pastor goes to visit a member of his congregation, and knocks on the door but when he receives no answer, he puts his card under the door after writing Rev 3:20 on it.

"Behold, I stand at the door and KNOCK: if any man hear my voice and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me."

On Sunday, the card came back to the pastor in the offering plate with "Gen 3:10" written on the back.

"I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself."

Posts: 14428 | Registered: Aug 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bob_Scopatz
Member
Member # 1227

 - posted      Profile for Bob_Scopatz   Email Bob_Scopatz         Edit/Delete Post 
Belle. That's a good one.

Ester is one of two books that does not contain the word "God"

Song of Solomon is the other.

Ain't the internet fun?

Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Mrs.M
Member
Member # 2943

 - posted      Profile for Mrs.M   Email Mrs.M         Edit/Delete Post 
I had a dissimilar, but very amusing, experience with our kids yesterday.

Three of our middle school girls had brought the dollhouse into the homework/arts and crafts center, where it's not supposed to be. They kept getting loud and my coworker Brandon kept telling them to quiet down. Finally he told them that if they didn't hush, they couldn't play with the dollhouse anymore. Of course they got loud again and Brandon told them to find something else to do because the dollhouse was being put away. To which Melanie (the ringleader of the middle schoolers and my secret favorite) replied, with perfect thirteen-year-old delivery:

Well, I guess I'll just go out into the street and do drugs.

I completely lost it and had to go into the office until I could control myself.

Posts: 3037 | Registered: Jan 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Hatrack River Home Page

Copyright © 2008 Hatrack River Enterprises Inc. All rights reserved.
Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.


Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classic™ 6.7.2