Its been four years since we've seen the Florida confusion and said farewell to President Clinton andVice President Gore.
9/11 brought us to war on terrorism that somehow evolved into a war on Iraq.
Micheal Jackson is going to trial for mistreating children, not counting his dangling of his son over a balcony of photographers.
Madonna has quietly slipped away into the role of sweet mother.
We have robots on Mars and satellites around Saturn, while the President promises a vigorous return to the manned conquest of space, in the next decade or two.
The final Star Wars movie is due in a year. This is seen as the end of a lonnnng train wreck.
Critics predict this is the end for the Star Trek franchise.
The company I work for--Fun Company--celebrates their 40th year, but my sales are disappointingly low, the lowest they have been in years.
Cindy and I just returned from Russia with our new son, Sasha.
July 13th, 1994
Bill Clinton is in office.
Its been a few years since we said farewell to President George Bush.
Monica Lewinski is a name that nobody knows.
911 is an emergency call number
Iraq is a thorn in the US Side. Hussein is full of bluster and noise. His people starve due to UN sanctions, while he plants a multi-million dollar nest egg for himself, his family, his clan, and his friends.
Some people complain about the aging space shuttle fleet, but they get the job done.
We have robot space ships heading out of the solar system.
Madonna is stretching the limits between wild and pornography with both her videos, and book.
Micheal Jackson is begining to get weird, and look weirder.
There is talk that Lucas might make Star Wars, the 1st three. We imagine they should be great.
Star Trek has two good series running, and talks of starting a third when TNG ends.
I've been working for this company a little over a year and a half. My wife may be joining me. That should be fun. The rest of my family thinks I'm nuts.
(The truth is, not one person working for the company then is still working there now, accept for me.)
Cindy and I just celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary a few months back. No children yet, despite the pleading of our family.
July 13th, 1984
We are in the second term of Ronald Reagan's presidency. It is rumored that his VP will run after this term, but I don't trust that ex-CIA head. He has no personality. The democrats are sure to take over and bring back the good times of the Jimmy Carter presidency.
Iraq is an ally, stemming the tide of Iranian fanatics that seek to conquer the mid-east.
There is talk of 911 emergency phone number being used here in St. Louis.
Since the destruction of the Space Shuttle, NASA and congress have promised to ensure that such will never ever happen again.
Micheal Jackson is the King of Pop. He is just so cool.
Madonna is new. She is playing off that tired Virgin/Whore combo that will get old quick. I don't expect her to last long.
The last Star Wars movie has come and gone. It is a bittersweet memory. Maybe in a few years there will be another, but its doubtful. The best we can hope for is the Video--on Beta.
The second Star Trek movie was great. The first was lousy. Spock is dead so obviously the franchise is dead too.
I am going to college and working at an amusement park. There I met this wonderful girl--Linda. We are dating, all hot and heavy. Her good friend Cindy has been bumming a ride home with me. She's nice too. She has a boyfriend. He's a bit of an idiot though. Her grandparents prefer me. Why do all the girls parents like me, and the cute women don't?
July 13th 1974 President Gerald Ford just pardoned President "I am not a crook" Nixon.
President Ford is just tripping over his own two feet, but hey, according to Archie Bunker, he's the best president that nobody ever voted for.
Iraq is something I think Bo Derek and Charlies Angels are famous for.
9-11 is a misprint of the liquor store 7-11.
George Lucas is writing his great 9 part movie scripts--Star Wars, but he is only famous for some movie about 1950's cars.
Star Trek has made its way into syndication. Wow this is cool stuff. Why did they let it die?
The only note-worth SciFi was the recent 2001. It was just too confusing.
Madonna is Christ's mother.
Micheal Jackson has his own cartoon show, with the rest of his brothers.
We have reached the moon, but the Apollo program is shutting down. Where do we go from here? Our leaders are planning bigger and better things.
By the time I grow up, I'll be able to go to the stars.
Fifth grade is fun, but I hate this teacher. She's just rude.
July 13th, 1964. President Johnson has recently taken over from the late President Kennedy. He is running again.
We are well on our way to landing on the moon, if we can just beat the @#$@#$ commie Russians there.
Star Trek is playing to mixed reviews.
George Lucas isn't in college yet.
The Fun Company opens their doors.
Madonna is still Jesus's mother.
Micheal Jackson is the cute little black boy on TV with his singing family. He is so adorable, people are predicting great things for him and his charmed childhood.
Cynthia Ann Bucher, one day to be Cynthia Ann Skipper, and eventually Cynthia Ann Davis isn't born yet. Her parents have not met.
And in a small room in Jewish Hospital in St. Louis, I make my grand entrance into the world, full of fury, signifying I need food!
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
OK. Many of the details in the above post are wrong. I can try to sneak them by, or get upset that some of you would nitpick about them, or spend hours of my busy time (I could be playing KoL right now) being accurate.
Instead, I turn this into a game.
Correct me, and find true facts about the 5 dates mentioned. July 13th, 1964, 1974, 1984, 1994, and 2004.
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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quote:And in a small room in Jewish Hospital in St. Louis, I make my grand entrance into the world, full of fury, signifying I need food!
Actually, this is just the story your parents tell you. You are, in fact, the son of two CIA operatives attempting to lead a coup d'etate in Yugoslavia against the communists. A coup that failed, leaving you parentless and alone, until your current parents adopted you of course.
posted
This is awesome, Dan. I'd rather give my predictions, though.
July 13, 2014
2nd term President Hillary Clinton (recently widowed) and VP Candace Bergen announce that they are engaged to be married- both of them to Brad Pitt. (we know this is the real reason polygamy won't come back, after all).
09/11 will be the new name of the nationwide convenience store, since it has better name recognition.
Michael Jackson will still be recovering from discovering, first hand, that 2010 was not a documentary.
Madonna will be contesting 17 year old Lourdes' suit for emancipation.
Pundits are abuzz with the rumor that veteran Mars rover "Opportunity" is considering running on the Republican ticket against VP Bergen in 2016.
Jake Lloyd will return to the screen in "Speaker for the Dead".
Star Trek conventioneers will finally gain tax-exempt religious status.
Fun Company will... uh, Turn 50.
Dan and Cindy will have more awesome adventures in international adoption and share more fascinating stories with the 'Rack. Happy Birthday!
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posted
happy 40th Dan... I hope I turn *OLD* with as much style, grace, and lack of hysteria as you have Posts: 3846 | Registered: Apr 2004
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1964 -- Start of the sexual revolution. "Make Love Not War" is first heard, though still 5 years from Woodstock.
1974 -- Sexual Revolution in full swing. Swingers, Playboy, Swapping and Key Parties all part of the hip generation.
1984 -- Sexual Revolution getting kind of old. Moral Majority wants it to end NOW! What's with this Aid's thing in the Gay community? Oh well, it won't bother us.
1994 -- AIDS! Safe sex or die. Give me a list of your last 20 sexual partners. Oh, you don't have that many? Great!!! Lets put on a few condoms and make out. Oh, you don't want to make out. WHew, safe again.
2004 -- Safe Sex getting kind of old. Bush Conservatives wants it to end NOW! What's with this Aid's thing in the Gay community? Oh well, it won't bother us.
Posts: 11895 | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
Dan, that was an awesome post. Your landmarks/milestones (whatever you want to call them) always are, they always give me something new to think about. Thank you for that, I'll be pondering your post while I'm surrounded by 23 little kids for seven hours today! They'll wonder what's the matter with me.
And happy birthday! *clinks glass* You rock. Stay here for a LONG time!!!
Posts: 7877 | Registered: Feb 2003
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posted
Great one Dan! As always! Happiest of Birthdays, may this year be the best one you've ever had!
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Ah, scuse me as I luxuriate in my youth. It's so nice to not have arthritis! Ooh, I think I'll run a marathon today. What's that, young lady? Of course I'd like to have sex! But not before we get hammered at one of those parties that don't suck and eat all sorts of food that would cause heartburn were we a few decades older!
Ah, it's nice to age gracefully, isn't it?
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What's rather disturbing about this is that I just realized Sophia Rose Davidson's going to be able to say the same crap to me once she's my age. Holy crap.
I'm not sure if that's a comfort to you, given that your bones will be rattling more than a bedpost in a pay-by-the-hour motel by then, but damn if it's not a bit disconcerting to me...
Posts: 3293 | Registered: Jul 2002
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posted
"What's rather disturbing about this is that I just realized Sophia Rose Davidson's going to be able to say the same crap to me once she's my age. Holy crap."
And, like me, you will probably chuckle, knowing you wouldn't go back to being her age for any amount of money in the world.
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