posted
I recently watched It Was a Wonderful Life (not to be confused with the perennial Christmas classic of similar name. ) It's a documentary telling the stories of several homeless women. I thought the moview was worth watching, but it was obviously not an unbiased view of homelessness. The stories were all about women who had lost their homes throught circumstances that truely could happen to any of us. They were good women trying to keep their jobs or get jobs or otherwise get themselves out of their situations, but were having very difficult times of it. The movie did serve to highlight difficiencies in the system which actually hindered people who wanted to better themselves out of the system. My heart went out to each one of these women.
The Interesting Ethical Question thread made me think about this movie again, and brought up something I thought about when I watched it. Namely, how do you know who is really in need?
Some people will answer that I shouldn't judge them, that it is uncharitable to think in terms of whether someone deserves my help. I can't really accept that. My ability to do good in the world is limited. I do not want to throw good money or resources into a bottomless pit when there are things I can do with my time and money that can have a lasting effect. If I knew one of those women personally, I would offer her my spare bedroom while she got back on her feet. I would do it with the understanding that it was a temporary situation and that she would continue to make reasonable sacrifices in order to get herself on her feet, get a job, get an apartment/house, etc. If I knew she was really trying to make herself a better, more self-sufficient person, I think I could be very generous. But how do you find someone you can help like that? Most I know first-hand are abusers of hospitality and charity. You give them $20 for gas and they put $5 in the tank and buy $15 lottery tickets (or cigarettes, or booze, or a new CD, or whatever) or you find you've simply supplied their need so they can use their own resources for their luxuries. They ask you for $10 for cab fare but refuse the offer of a ride in your car instead. They ask for money for food, but balk when you offer to buy the food instead. These people I refuse to sacrifice for because they are people I cannot trust.
So how can you find the ones you can trust and who you can actually help? I know there are soup kitchens and various charity agencies, but these are largely band-aids and are often just as ill equipped to weed out abusers as the government welfare programs are. I don't want to be part of the perpetuation culture. I'd rather make a significant difference to one person than an infinitesimal difference to a group.
Posts: 6394 | Registered: Dec 1999
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posted
I supposed the only way you can know is by really getting to know them.
Short of that -- I guess you could ask people who DO know them -- people who work regularly in the soup kitchen, work with the homeless, etc. They interact with people daily and pretty much know their stories and who is legit.
posted
Well, as far as specific people who need help go, my charitable interest of the week is the daughter of a guy who keeps an online journal. She is five years old, and will always be mute, and they're raising money to buy an outrageously expensive tool that will allow her to both communicate with the world around her, and teach her proper grammar and sentence structure for when she's older. Both of the parents work full-time at Barnes and Noble, and their insurance won't cover the device.
So, if you're in the mood, giving a poor little girl a "voice" for the first time in her life seems like a darn good cause. Posts: 1681 | Registered: Jun 2004
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posted
If you're in a position to do so, hire someone who really needs a job.
We have someone come in to clean every other week, sometimes more often. I could do it, if I had to, but a. I'd rather not and b. this other woman needs the money. We both win, and I get to give something back to the community. Sure, it's a small way, but it helps her.
Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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posted
Karl, you bring up some really good points. We are limited in what we can do. I can't give everyone who asks me money or charity.
I'm also very leery of donating money to big charities because I want my money to go to help people, not to pay some exorbitant overhead cost or CEO's salary.
My personal view of charity is that I give where I have some control over how the money is used. That means that the vast majority of the money that I have available goes to my church, because as a voting member I can exercise some control over how it's spent. We spend a good deal each year to fund the medical missions to Honduras, because my husband sees those people, helps them, and knows their needs and understands how much 20 dollars can really make a difference in their lives.
I know there are plenty of people on public assistance in America that really need it. I'm glad it's available for those that do need it. I have never, thank God, needed it myself, but family members have and it's really helped them. I know not everyone on food stamps or welfare is abusing the system. Unfortunately, too many of them do - there are plenty of stories of abuse, and like most people here I've seen some of it first hand in grocery stores.
My husband works in a very low-income public housing area and sees all manner of abuses. My mom is a human resource manager and goes through endless cycles of people who take jobs and work them only long enough to get unemployment and then quit. There are people out there who would rather live off the public's dime than work for a living. It sours us on the idea of supporting such programs, even if there are people who need it.
Posts: 14428 | Registered: Aug 2001
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posted
I have never said "no" when asked for spare change unless I really don't have any. On occasion, I have not had any change, and have instead given someone a $5 bill. (Most of the time, I don't carry cash, so that's rare.)
However, I do prefer to do most of my giving through tithes and offerings, making donations when we can afford it to the Church's Humanitarian Relief fund or the Perpetual Education Fund, as well as to other charitable institutions run by the church. (Right now, we can't afford it, so we stick to an honest tithe of everything we earn and as much of a fast offering as we feel we can make. A fast offering goes to help those who need food and basic necessities in the immidiate area.)
posted
A co-worker was just telling me about a pretty cool sounding program that you give homemade (sewn, knitted or crocheted) blankets and quilts to an organization that distributes them to low income and mentally ill people. I think I'm going to try to make at least one this year.
For some reason I liked donating my time or energy better than money. It means more to me. I mean yeah I won't get the same sort of tax break but I feel like if I'm giving money I am doing it mostly for the tax break.
posted
My dilemma would be solved, perhaps, if I had a church. I just don't see myself joining one simply to find people to help. I would feel like a hypocrite if I hid my philosphical convictions, and like a destroyer if I shared them in an environment where people go for the express purpose of strenghtening their own faith.
Posts: 6394 | Registered: Dec 1999
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posted
It is always a sorry statement on the human race when there are individuals out there who abuse any system in place.
To draw a parallel: We own quite a bit of ground. Our property offers lots of native grass clear down to a major river. It is a wildlife mecca. I often count 15 deer within eyesight on most any given winter morning.
So we get lots of pleas from hunters. After all, we're only 35-40 miles from a major metropolitan area that has lots of guys that like to hunt.
But we ban all hunters - even though I am not personally against hunting at all, and I enjoy eating venison myself.
Why?
Past experience. Hunters who seemed "okay" but ended up cutting fence, shooting livestock, shooting dogs, getting drunk and shooting everything, have no respect for property and tear things up, shoot toward the house, people who haven't asked permission and enter the property illegally, people who come in at night and spotlight and shoot after legal hunting hours, etc. etc. etc.
Sure there are good hunters. I know some personally. People who really know the rules, respect the rules, respect others.
But overall, you can't just tell by just meeting them in their blaze orange vests.
So we end up having to exclude everyone - so we know that ANYONE on the property is illegal.
Sometimes people take this view toward charity -- they have had bad experiences with it, or don't trust it, so they quit giving altogether.
Which wouldn't happen if we didn't have people abusing the system.
posted
You can find excellent information on organizations which help people, on how they find people to help, what they do to help, how they get their money, and how their money gets spent through sites like http://www.interaction.org/Posts: 15770 | Registered: Dec 2001
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posted
Other ways that are more "indirect" include really watching your personal consumption of goods (i.e., locally made goods, or free-trade goods; biking/walking rather than driving; recycling, reusing, etc.)
Other ways of helping that I have tried include volunteering in the local school as a literacy tutor. Many schools also do a "lunch buddy" program, or you might consider being a big brother - and in that way, you can directly help the children that suffer when their parents are struggling.
Some other things I have done include reading books onto cassette tapes for folks that were sight-impaired. Your local library could maybe direct you . . .
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) It's a documentary telling the stories of several homeless women. I thought the moview was worth watching, but it was obviously not an unbiased view of homelessness. The stories were all about women who had lost their homes throught circumstances that truely could happen to any of us. They were good women trying to keep their jobs or get jobs or otherwise get themselves out of their situations, but were having very difficult times of it. The movie did serve to highlight difficiencies in the system which actually hindered people who wanted to better themselves out of the system. My heart went out to each one of these women. 
