posted
Like the title says, I am worried about my younger sister. She is a senior in high school and soon she will be going off to college over at Penn State. She is a smart girl but she has been having horrible anxiety problems this past year.
Between my two younger sisters and I, she is the middle child and has always been shy. At home she is a different person, but in public she has always tended to be very quiet and more reserved. Because of this she has a harder time making friends.
Things were starting to go well for her when she joined the cross-country team and started doing an excellent job. People started noticing her and she started to get a good group of friends as well as a much needed boost of confidence in herself.
My family (myself included) is full of worriers and often times feel so worried that it makes us sick. I actually delt with it all last semester. I was sick every morning and throughout the day to the point where I could barely eat anything without feeling like I was going to throw up or have to go to the bathroom. After a while, all you want is to feel better so you can eat real food and go through your normal day without that pit of nauseousness in your stomach. It took a while, and though I am still not completely over it, I am getting much better.
Well, it turned out my sister back home was suffering from the same thing. We had the same symptoms. After a while of this, My mom took my sister to the doctors and they checked her bloodwork and ran all sorts of other tests on her. Everything came back fine. They told her, because she is likely just anxious and nervous about tests and her senior year that she might have developed irritable bowl syndrome. Her diet was monitored to bland foods but it only worked for a little bit. She ended up having to be hospitalized at one point for a few days because she became so dehydrated and so weak.
My sister is a tiny girl. She has been thin and tall all her life. I worry because she seriously has a problem because of this stomach thing where she just doesnt eat. She was told by doctors to get on a diet w/ high fat and fiber and anything that would help give her some weight. It isnt that she doesnt want to eat and get better, but that she feels sick. She is already so thin and her weight has been dropping. My mom says that it has dropped to the point where she wont even tell my mom what it is (My guess is below 100lbs because last time I left home it almost made me cry when I hugged her and she was just skin and bones---more than usual anyways).
It isnt anorexia because she doesnt want to lose weight. It is almost all mental. She runs to the bathroom all the time and just cannot seem to force herself to eat. She has been seeing a therapist for a while but she just keeps slipping back into this pattern of feeling sick and not eating. She knows it is up to her to help herself. My parents have gotten her books on how to help change her mental attitude but nothing is working. My mom seems to think once school is over she will get better but we are all worried sick about her. If she continues this any longer she is going to have to be hospitalized again and be force fed which will not be a pleasant experience.
I have tried to be the big sister and get her to eat something no matter how little. I have called her to find out how she is doing and told her that if she needs anything to give me a call whatever time of day. Is there something else I could be doing? I will be home in less than two weeks. I am just not sure how to handle all of this. My parents have done and tried everything they could think of but it is pretty much up to my sister now to get better. Is there anything that I can do to move this process along? I am just not sure what to do anymore. I know she'll get better...but when? Posts: 306 | Registered: Jun 2003
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posted
EDIT: In reaction to what Theca said further down the thread, I want to make it clear that my experience may be totally different from what your sister or you had, only that it reminded me of my experiences. Mine was nowhere near as severe as your sister's. I meant to offer my own experience as a "here's another story" thing, and some ways that I dealt with it. I have edited this thread to be more careful in what I say or insinuiate.
I just want to make it clear that I am in no way an authority, whereas Theca is.
I have had this, or something similar. I think its some kind of anxiety disorder, and it may be inherited as you say, because my Mum had it also. I used to get it in the morning, and before movies (I did not see The Two Towers in theatres because I simply couldn't). It still occaisionally rears its ugly head.
At first, my Mum thought it was bulemia and cornered me about it, but I knew it was not. I wanted to eat... I could eat, but sometimes I couldn't. I'm sorry that it affects your sister in such a way. It was never so bad for me, because it only happened at certain times. For me, it seemed to be connected with swallowing rapidly until the point that I threw up.
For me, it was definately up to me to fight it. Because I had problems eating breakfast, I ate slowly and outdoors in the cold morning air. There was no one around but me. I took tiny bites. It didn't always work and there were lots of days that began badly. On days when my breakfast didn't stay down I took extra food for the rest of the day. Running or singing took my mind off my body and kept food down. Breathing calmly also helped. Can your sister do that? Are there certain times of day when she can eat easily? Are there places where things go okay? is there a trigger (like swallowing a lot) that causes it?
Movies was more difficult, because sometimes it happened without warning. I threw up in Spiderman in the theatre. I was watching the third (sixth) Star Wars on TV when I couldn't watch anymore and had to leave, which is why I never completed the trilogy. The only movie I saw in theatres during this period was one of the Harry Potter movies, and I did it by preparation and distraction. I knew I was doing it days in advance and before the movie started I took a notebook to fiddle in.
I remember how great I felt when I saw Love Actually, and survived. Return of the King was the second movie I saw and because it was an action movie I took every precaution I could, and again, I was fine. Elation. I still take my notebook and I still breath calmly in movie theatres, though.
Your parents seem to be offering a lot of support which is great. Like you say, though, your sister may need to find things that work for her, if any, and ease her way into a normal schedule. For me, it was definately something that only I could deal with, although for you and/or your sister it may be completely different.
I never saw a doctor but I know that if it had been even a little bit worse than it was I would and should have gone.
posted
I don't think that I completely understand, but your sister definitely has my sympathy.
Teshi, I'm also not sure I'm quite getting what you're describing. I understand that you had a problem with vomiting during movies, both on TV and in the theater, but I'm not sure why. Can you explain? I've started to type several different "is it because" type sentences, but I don't feel like I have enough of a grasp of what you're talking about to really make an educated guess at this point.
In any case, I'm glad that you're doing better now, and I hope that RR's sister will improve once the stress of school abates.
posted
It's exactly how it sounds, really. No rhyme or reason.
You feel anxious, then sick, then you throw up. It's basically an anxiety disorder of some kind. Once it happens once or twice you become anxious that it will happen again, and then of course it does. Vicious cycle. At least that how it was for me. It was generally for things that I became excited or anxious about; the climax of Spiderman and Star Wars, the possibility of seeing Two Towers... sounds silly, really, but it was just the way it manifested itself for me.
Also: It would get worse if there was no 'escape' even if it was not exciting. I was with my school watching a orchestral concert and I felt ill and then as soon as I thought about it it just became worse, and I had to walk out.
Is that what you're asking? It's difficult to describe. I'm sure there's a medical term but I never went to the doctor about it.
Posts: 8473 | Registered: Apr 2003
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posted
As a doctor, this thread disturbs me. I suppose I shouldn't say anything, but I feel like I have to, just to make sure she's had a proper workup. You don't need to answer these online, I just want you to read them and think about them.
If she is this sick, still losing weight, she should still be following up with her doctors. Is she? Did she see any specialists? Did she have bowel studies done? Did she try medications for GI problems? Are doctors still following along and weighing her and discussing options?
You can't assume it is all mental, just because something similar runs in the family or because other people you know or people here on Hatrack have had something similar. If her psychologist isn't getting anywhere, and all the doctors do think it is anxiety related, then has she seen a psychiatrist for specialized treatment for anxiety? It takes a specialist to help determine whether a component of bulimia or anorexia is present, btw. You can't take her word for it, that is part of the disorder sometimes.
Posts: 1990 | Registered: Feb 2001
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posted
Listen to Theca. I'm not a doctor. I'm just relating my similar experience which was nowhere near as severe, and it was and is mental for me.
I'm sorry I didn't make this clear earlier .
EDIT: And Theca, I'm not sure if you're saying that what I had was some variation bulemia... are you? You should say, if you think so.
Also, do you think it's okay for me to leave my experiences up there as they are? I don't want anything to do any harm. I thought it would help, but if you think it's going to cause trouble, I'll certainly erase what I said, or cut it down. Your post has really worried me, because it sounds like I've done something very wrong. Please come back and tell me what you think .
posted
I have recently been diagnosed with an irritable bowel illness as well. I have only been through one patch were I spent two weeks basically sleeping. Even though the worst of it is over i have lost a significant amount of weight and having a very difficult time putting it back on.(something that I never had trouble with before)
posted
RR, I hope that your sister is able to find some coping strategy. I don't know what that might be. Does she have a comfort food that she can get down when nothing else will?
It does sound serious and worrying to me. I'm glad you're keeping in close contact with her.
Posts: 2711 | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
my sister has been seeing specialists. I believe they have been to the GI specialist a few times. I know some tests were run and I think she was on some medicine for some time (maybe she still is) but it doesn't seem to be doing much. I am not completely sure how often she goes to the psychiatrist but I guess the most recent time was that she has to work through some breathing excercises to help calm herself down.
Like I said, I am not home so I am not exactly sure what goes on and all the people she has been seeing for her condition. I don't believe there is any comfort food that she has and can hold down easily. Last time I was home I spent an hour just trying to get her to eat part of a banana, a cracker and some gatorade after she had been feeling sick. She didnt eat it all but at least she ate something. I only know what my mom tells me and I know they are worried right now that if she doesn't start putting on weight soon she will have to be hospitalized into some rehab program. I just hope it doesnt have to get to that point but if it is the only thing that will get her better then I guess it is for the best.
Posts: 306 | Registered: Jun 2003
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posted
RackhamsRazor, Theca made some good points. One thing I noticed:
quote: she might have developed irritable bowl syndrome.
That's a very big "might." Theca is right: your sister needs a good, specific diagnosis so she can get treated properly--is it anxiety or physical, or both, or something else?? I will pray and hope she get's better.
Teshi, you didn't do anything wrong, just related your story, which has some similarities to RR's sister's. I love movies, and it's very sad for me to hear about you missing them because of your problem. I hope your coping strategies work well for you.
edit:RR, I missed your last post while I wrote mine.
posted
Yeah, irritable bowel syndrome is usually annoying, but benign. Problems this severe, I've never seen chalked up to irritable bowel, not even after extensive testing. Weight loss isn't a sign of IBS at all.
Posts: 1990 | Registered: Feb 2001
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posted
Wow! I have no medical advice, but I definately will be praying for your sister and that they can find something to help her soon.
My own half-sister had trouble with severe anxiety as a teen and during her college years (and some, now, but she has gotten better). She is just a very tiny person as well, but I never thought about that in relation to the anxiety until now -- since I didn't live with her, I don't know her eating habits. But I know anxiety itself can be quite crippling, from what she tells me.
I definately hope they find some what of getting nutrients into her system, and helping her, before she goes off to college, which is very stressful.
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