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Author Topic: A girl that i like.
conan the buff
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Hey guys and girls how are you all.
The reason why Im writing is that theres this girl and she's well, absolutely gorgeous I kinda know her but not that well. I met her through her step sisster and I think shes right for me but Im not really sure. We're not really friends or anything so I cant just ask her out, and now that Im working full time I dont go to school anymore. Therefore I cant just see her whenever I want making it a bit hard to get to know her better. Anyone have some advice......

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Paul Goldner
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Yes.
Go up to her, and ask if she'd like to get coffee (hot chocolate, ice cream, whatever) with you some afternoon.

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Jonathan K.
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everything seems so easy when your writing it on a forum
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Paul Goldner
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True that, but its still good advice [Razz]

Seriously, girls respond to confidence. If you have the confidence to ask a girl to do something, and she's at all interested, she'll normally say yes. It may not go anywhere, but if you hang around waiting for the opportunity, the opportunity will normally have been before you started hanging around waiting for an opportunity.

Asking to do something casual like coffee or ice cream takes the pressure off, and makes it more likely she'll say yes.

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conan the buff
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Thanx Paul I might just do that she's currently working at KFC so I might stop by mabye order something and ask her then, do you think that would be alright? Or should I wait for her to finish work???
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Paul Goldner
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Asking her at work might be a decent idea. Especially if you are available after she finishes a shift? Its possible that if you go in near the end of her shift, and ask if she would like to get (ice cream, coffee, whatever) when she finishes, that she'll be really interested in the idea.
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Lyrhawn
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I'm in the same situation with a girl at my work. Cute, funny, seems to think that I'm funny as well. Theoretically that'd make it a good idea to ask her out.

Sadly, I'm a wuss, and it probably won't happen.

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Jonathan K.
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It might be embarrising for her if there are other people waiting in line
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Nell Gwyn
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Personally, if a guy asked me out at work, I'd feel kinda trapped and pressured...which would probably make me say no. Especially if I didn't know him very well, that would definitely put me in "eek" mode.

Just my two cents. Good luck!

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Lyrhawn
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Depends on how you do it. Keep it casual. If you act all stalkerish then yeah, she'll get freaked out.

But if you already kinda know her, and would probably strike up a conversation with her anyway, then just slip a "how's your shift going? blah blah blah so when do you get off? T Well if you aren't too tired and want to grab a cup of coffee on me, we could continue this conversation then." or something like that.

If she really wants to go, she'll say yes, if she doesn't she'll say she's too tired, which gives her an out and relieves some of that pressure.

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conan the buff
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hey thanx guy this is all great advice and i really appreciate it. wish me luck. and thanx nell ill keep wat you said in mind.
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Samarkand
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I would change the wording a little - I think you should say "Can I buy you coffee/ ice cream/ lunch tonight/ tomorrow/ now?" See, if you use the wording of "buy you lunch" we feel evil for turning it down, and if you give a specific time, we can't say "sure" and then flake out because we're "busy". I think that if you know her at all and she thinks you're a decent human being and you ask like this, you have a very good shot.

I also think that if you walked up and said, "I hear you like double mochas" or something (maybe you can find this out from the step-sister?), that might might be a good opener. The point is to seem genuinely interested in what she likes (as opposed to her just her boobs) but not creepy.

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Jonathan K.
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I'm sorry, but i can not imagine a normal situation in which one almost-stranger can say to someone "i hear you like double mochas"
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Lyrhawn
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lol, that's probably true.
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sillygoose
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I would never turn a guy down that offered me ice cream. But, maybe that's just me [Big Grin]
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Avadaru
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I wouldn't want to be asked out at work - it would make me feel really uncomfortable. I also would never go on a date straight from work - I work at a pet store and after a long shift sometimes end up smelling like, well, pets. I can't speak for her or any other girls, but I know that I would definitely like an opportunity to freshen up before going out. You might try casually talking to her while she's working, though - stop by, order something, chat a few minutes, say "See you around", and save the asking out for a different situation.
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Nato
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I second the "don't ask her at work" thing. Especially for a restaurant. She'll want to go home and shower most likely.
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Nell Gwyn
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Another thing on the "don't ask her at work" idea - it's quite likely that she goes to work already wearing her uniform. She probably wouldn't be caught dead wearing it in public anywhere other than work - or at least, I wouldn't - and if she doesn't have a change of clothes at work, going someplace afterward won't sound like such a great idea to her.

Is there another place you might be able to casually run into her?

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conan the buff
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Hey Nell you have been really helpfull she goes to the same school as my little brother i could take the day off work, go and see my brother and mabye run into her. What do you htink about that?
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Samarkand
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Heehee, just don't accidentally run into her *too* often before asking her out. We figure it our fairly quickly, conceited little creatures that we are.

And regarding double mochas - I live in Boulder. It is a strange and wonderful land, and that would so happen here. Ahh, Boulder . . . I guess just find out something about her that you can use to get a bit of an "in".

Friends paraphrase:

Rachel: "Well, if I wanted to strike up a conversation with Joey I'd mention sandwiches . . . or my underwear . . ."
Joey: "I'm listening."

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