posted
A long time ago, I started a thread mentioning that I've heard the LDS Church is great at finding people's family histories, and asking how I should go about seeking help toward that end. I was advised to call a local church and ask whether there was a Family History Center in my area.
However, I have a paralysing telephonophobia. (Some of you are going to mock me now, but that's your problem. I'm perfectly aware that being afraid of making phone calls is ridiculous and that I should snap out of it, but because it is a phobia, by definition it's not that easy. I'm working on it. Leave me alone.) So basically the only way was to go to a church physically and ask someone.
That brings its own complications. I can't usually go to houses of worship, because I'm terrified I might interrupt something. I once left a Catholic church in Italy that was a scheduled part of a guided tour because there was a service (mass?) going on at the very moment we were there. The church knew we were coming, because tour groups go through there all the time. But as I am not Catholic, I did not feel comfortable standing there gawking while everyone was in there worshipping. I stepped outside and waited for the rest of the group.
Well, I'm not Mormon either, so it took me quite a while to work up the nerve to go into a Mormon church. I got lucky--their service (meeting?) had just gotten out, and I passed by a couple of gentlemen leaving right on my way in, one of whom turned out to be the bishop. He was happy to take a few extra minutes to answer my questions, and he gave me the address of the local Family History Center.
I had a half-day at work today, so I stopped off at the address before I went home. Right; there was a service going on right then. I didn't actually go into that area, but I could hear someone giving very emotional testimony (they were weeping freely) as I wandered awkwardly down the halls looking for the Family History Center.
See, this is why I don't like going to houses of worship. I don't know what the rules are. I mean, obviously I know not to blaspheme or wander into the room where the testimony was being given and shout, "HEY, CAN ANYONE HELP ME?" I mean, I'm not stupid. But I also have no experience with these places--I was not raised in any faith, so never spent my childhood going to church or anything--and I honestly don't know what is okay.
So now I'm wondering if I screwed it up. Was it an insult to have me wandering the halls at that moment? Did the people that saw me think I was interrupting? Should I have left immediately? And what on earth am I supposed to do when I go back? Because, it turns out, the Family History Center is closed for the Christmas holiday, and won't open again until January. So I wasn't able to find out anything today, and I will have to go back. *sigh*
Posts: 1814 | Registered: Jul 2004
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So would anybody else. So would I, if I didn't have this phobia. I said I'm working on it, not that I've gotten rid of it.
Posts: 1814 | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
The question I think I would ask myself is "Am I more afraid of interupting what may be going on than I am of making a telephone call?"
For me, I'd be far more afraid of interupting and thereby wasting my time because I wouldn't actually go in if I thought I was interupting. I don't like calling people, but it would be the lesser of two evils in this case.
If you choose to call first, you tackle two birds with one stone: 1) you find out what you want to know, and 2) you actively work on conquering your fear of phone calls.
I'd say go for the phone call. Pray first before you pick up the receiver. I know that sounds stupid, but it may actually help, and it couldn't do any harm.
Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001
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posted
They might not have the Family History Center going during church services on Sunday. I'd be surprised if they did. You might check back on a weekday. And the Family History Center usually has its own entrance, so you hopefully won't get stuck wandering the halls.
Posts: 5957 | Registered: Oct 2001
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posted
In my part of the world, this isn't Sunday. It's Friday. That's part of the reason I thought it might be safe to go in today. At any rate, I did find the correct place, so I won't have to do so much hall-wandering next time. I know which door to go in now.
Posts: 1814 | Registered: Jul 2004
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This will get you to a place where you can look up locations and hours of the Family History Center nearest you. . . . Although you may already have this information. You can also play around on the website--it has some good resources you can use while the Center is closed for Christmas.
And no, it was not an insult to wander the halls.
Posts: 364 | Registered: Dec 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Verily the Younger: So now I'm wondering if I screwed it up. Was it an insult to have me wandering the halls at that moment? Did the people that saw me think I was interrupting? Should I have left immediately? And what on earth am I supposed to do when I go back? Because, it turns out, the Family History Center is closed for the Christmas holiday, and won't open again until January. So I wasn't able to find out anything today, and I will have to go back. *sigh*
No, no and no. People wander freely through LDS meetinghouse corridors all the time. As long as you didn't barge in yelling, you weren't interrupting. When you go back, if you can't find the FHC, it would be perfectly all right to quietly enter a room where a meeting was going on to ask, as long as no one was praying.
Don't give up. Geneology is fun!
Posts: 2069 | Registered: May 2001
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You wouldn't have been viewed as interrupting anything, no. Looking for the Family History Center is a perfectly legitimate reason to be wandering the halls. I imagine you could have poked your head into the room and asked someone close to the door where the center was, and they would have been happy to tell you. Don't worry about that.
Posts: 5957 | Registered: Oct 2001
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posted
Must've been a fireside or something (not the same as worship services). Most meetinghouses have activities going on different evenings of the week, (except for Monday, but the FHC would be closed then too). You're perfectly safe going on a Friday; no one will be bothered or insulted. (Unless by "perfectly safe" you mean "there won't be anything else going on in the building." )
My building has a FHC in it too, and it frustrates me that they don't have more signs with directions on which door to use. There's a door right next to it, but that door's around the back and nothing is posted on the other doors to tell people that. But we are used to having strangers come in and ask where the FHC is and what hours they're open.
(BTW I have a pretty bad fear of the phone, too, although I can usually get over it to avoid having to make a trip with my kids just to ask a question.) If you can't call, hopefully they'll have the FHC hours posted on the door, but if not they should be somewhere on the wall inside. I can tell you right now they won't be open on Sunday or on Monday nights. When you go back, pretend it's a library and behave like you would there. Seems to work for me. Posts: 1522 | Registered: Nov 2005
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posted
I wouldn't worry about it. Nobody expects you to know when services are; they only expect you not to yell during one, and other things you already know about.
I've been in a Mormon church; lots of people present; nobody paid me any attention except the person I was meeting. (They were in the genealogy room, too.)
Posts: 1877 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
I'm going to confirm what others have already said - you did nothing wrong by wandering the halls or any of your other behavior as described. You were perfectly fine.
I understand about telephone phobia. I have a milder version than you, it appears, although mine is made worse by the fact that very few people here speak in an accent that I can understand easily over the phone, so I prefer talking to locals in person where I can get a better sense of what they're saying. But I hated phones before that anyway.
While you're waiting for January for the FHC (most FHCs are closed over Christmas as well as July and August - I've worked in them before, and now I oversee the one FHC we have in Sri Lanka) you can check this out and get started. It has some basic information on how to get started on your family history.
As well, if you have any specific questions, feel free to ask here. There are probably enough of us here who have experience with family history that we can give you some guidance.
Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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