posted
But I was incapacitated this afternoon and evening (horrid back spasms, I want this overgrown child OUT!), and he made a lovely dinner-- ground beef patties, baked potatoes (okay, microwaved, but he did a really good job and they tasted incredible), and a green salad. And he baked cookies yesterday so we had those for dessert, even. (I almost never make dessert!) Did I mention that he did all this while watching the two-year-old after cleaning and rearranging the living room, while I watched tv and groaned on the heating pad, and then brought it to me in bed? And then he did laundry afterwards. My husband is teh awesome. Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I know. He also came and rubbed my back and then massaged my hands and feet with lotion. After giving Ems her bath and getting her down for the night. Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Fahim won't cook. No matter how lousy I feel, not even if I'm writhing in pain on the sofa, unable to stand on my own. He will, however, help me into the kitchen, get things out of the fridge, set me down at the nook with chopping block and knife. And he won't complain at whatever I feed him.
But he won't cook. Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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See, there's a bright side to feeling miserable -- the delicious pampering and pride you have when your sweetheart rises to the occasion.
My husband is physically incapable of cooking. No joke. My 15 year old son just won't cook. Seriously. He will eat frozen pizza bagels and frozen veggie burgers sooner than zap them in the microwave.
If there is any food served around here, it's because I cooked it.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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My cats won't cook, either! I've tried and tried to get them to contribute to the food preparation around here but the most they will do is warm up their catfood for me sometimes by eating really fast then throwing it back up.
They contribute in a lot of other important ways, though. They can curl up and nap in such a deep and blissful manner that peace and contentment radiate throughout the entire house. They make great lap, chest, and side warmers for napping humans. And with their keen appreciation for rolling on the carpet in sunshine, they serve to remind me of the simple luxury of my life that I take for granted (having enough to eat, being warm, being able to sleep soundly without fear, etc.) Posts: 6246 | Registered: Aug 2004
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When I was about five and my mom was going to school full time, my dad tried for the first time to actually make meals. The only reason they were good was because he gave them clever names. Super Duper Corn was frozen corn with way too much butter microwaved in a custard cup, Burnt and runny eggs was his only way to get protein down me (fried eggs). I learned to cook at 8.
Posts: 5362 | Registered: Apr 2004
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My husband used to rely solely on mac and cheese (which he occasionally managed to screw up anyway), takeout, or frozen meals when I was not cooking and there were no leftovers. See how he is blossoming? He even goes and searches for recipes on recipezaar sometimes. Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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My dad always made me go out to eat with him when my mom was gone.
I think because he hates everything I cook.
Like, I think that cream of mushroom soup and rice and pieces of chicken mixed together in a bowl is a meal.
And I like to be healthy. He hates anything low fat or low sugar, and he hates skim milk. I drank whole milk until I was 14. Now, I can't stand it; it's too thick.
posted
Since I started working full-time a couple of weeks ago, my beloved has cooked dinner each Friday night and a few meals in between, too. He is making me post this...but it's still true.
Man who cooks = sexy
Man who takes care of everything else as well while you're sick = way sexy
Posts: 2762 | Registered: Sep 1999
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My situation is the opposite. I am a terrible cook. The more I practice, the worse I get. That of course doesn't stop me from trying...
However, when my bf and I are sharing a meal, there is absolutely no way he is going to let me go near the oven. Lucky for me (well, him, really--I usually can choke down my meals), he's a naturally amazing cook and enjoys doing it.
Posts: 484 | Registered: Feb 2006
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quote:kq, I'm sorry I haven't been paying attention but I don't follow the pregnancy threads -- I knew you were pregnant, but how far along are you?
35 weeks. And going to be induced early because of the baby's size. About 3 1/2 weeks to go! *cheers*
quote:quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Like, I think that cream of mushroom soup and rice and pieces of chicken mixed together in a bowl is a meal. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sounds great to me.
Hey, bake it in the oven and throw in a salad or even some carrot and celery sticks, and even my mom would agree with you!
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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quote: Fahim won't cook. No matter how lousy I feel, not even if I'm writhing in pain on the sofa, unable to stand on my own. He will, however, help me into the kitchen, get things out of the fridge, set me down at the nook with chopping block and knife.
Quid, is this a religious objection, or is he just stubborn? Because it seems like this would be something easy enough to fix if it's the latter: if he doesn't cook, he doesn't eat.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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Nah, I wouldn't do that to him. He works for a living, I don't. He takes out the garbage and takes care of the gross disgusting things without me asking him or him complaining. I do the rest. I'm getting the really really good end of the deal here. I have all the time in the world to write or sew or do whatever I want other than the very limited demands on my time.
What I'm saying is that, while I'm complaining, they're just wussy complaints and not real. Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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Well, still, presumably he gets to take days off work when he's sick, right? (I'm assuming that they have sick leave in Sri Lanka and don't just leave the ill to die in puddles of their own corporate sweat.) If so, so should you.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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Fahim works for a domain hosting company in the US over the internet. He doesn't take time off for being sick. Actually, he has a pretty lousy job in terms of days off - only one per week. That's why he's looking for another job.
This isn't about woman's work. This is about what works for us. I don't want to work outside the home, and I don't have to. It's coincidence that it happens to fall into the labels of woman's work vs. men bringing home the bacon, but it's only coincidence. If I really wanted to work that badly, I would. But I don't.
And yes, I'm going to whine and complain when I feel that ill, but unfortunately, Tom, it's not that simple. I feel ill far too much of the time. I'm in the middle of perimenopausal hell which was predated by period hell, and I feel ill - nauseous, lightheaded, cramps, headaches, hot flashes, mood swings, and a whole lot more - a really large proportion of the time. If you want a good solution, I think that the best one would be to shoot me and let me be over my misery already.
We hired a maid, or two, but that didn't work out. If we could hire another one - we'd have to find one, first - we would. Problem solved. Unfortunately, in this country, it's difficult to find people who are reliable and will actually show up.
Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
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my only point being, that the work done by those persons willing and wanting to stay at home and do the (IMHO) critically important job of homemaking, deserves to be acknowledged and valued.
I'm glad that it works out for both of you -- and frankly, I wish I had a similar situation. I am imagining that Tom's point was merely that the work you do is valuable, and that whether you work "from" or "at" home, you deserve to take care of your health needs, too.
If I misinterpreted that, shoot me.
Figuratively speaking, of course . . . *smile*
Posts: 5609 | Registered: Jan 2003
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quote:I am imagining that Tom's point was merely that the work you do is valuable, and that whether you work "from" or "at" home, you deserve to take care of your health needs, too.
Yes. If the situation you described is accurate -- that you're passing out on your feet, but Fahim is helping you into the kitchen and sitting you down at a cutting board because he refuses to cook -- I'd be very concerned. Especially if, as I understand it, he works from home.
I sympathize with your desire to pull your own weight, but what you were describing -- and I don't know how much you were exaggerating, if at all -- simply isn't healthy. If you lost an arm, would you still be expected to find a way to chop food? Would he roll you into the kitchen if you were temporarily unable to walk? If not, why would he expect you to wield knives when you're at risk of fainting?
If you're okay with the situation, that's cool. But you need to make sure that Fahim knows that some day when you're REALLY too sick to cook, you're not going to cook; he'll cook, or he'll order out, or he won't eat. The marriage contract doesn't extend to "harm myself for you."
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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