posted
Now I admit, when I really liked the movie when I watched it with my then husband last year. And we both agreed that it would not be appropriate for our then 5 yr old.
I really don't think it is any better for a 6 yr old than a 5 yr old. It is rated R for crying out loud.
I LOVE having him get home and asking if we have it so that he can finish watching it because he fell asleep during it last night.
So not only is the ex showing him rated R movies, but having him stay up WAY past his bedtime to do it.
I don't know what to say to him, how to talk to him about this. E-mail, phone, letter. It seems like I can most easily keep my cool in e-mail. I don't know. I need to wait until I'm calmer, but SERIOUSLY... WHAT and IDIOT! Posts: 772 | Registered: Feb 2005
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posted
Play his game, get "Advent Children" and your kid will laugh the next time he wants to put on Appleseed.
Thats not exactly the solution you were probably looking for I was just being facetious.
What bothers you more, the movie or the time at which they watched the movie? Try to identify that and then calmly voice your concern. If you just yell about the R rating and the time at which it was watched it sounds like it could get into a pointless arguement about precidence, and whether you both have the right to do as you please with the child.
In my experience if you can get ONE point worked out between you and another person you have accomplished more than 99% of the arguements that go on in the world. Shoot for either persuading you ex to not watch R rated movies with your child, or that he should not start a movie that late.
I really think you will be suprised how much better conversations are if you aim to win a small battle and actually win it rather than taking on the whole issue and losing. Just remember its most likely he wants the same thing for your child that you do, even if your methods vary.
Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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My advice is to let it go unless you think it is going to do specific harm to your child. Is he having nightmares? I suspect that it's possible your ex did it to annoy you. That being the case, unless there is true harm being done, I would let it go and save your battles for the really important things.
If you still need to address it with your son, I'd probably say something like "You know honey, I'm not comfortable showing you that movie. Your daddy gets to decide what goes on in his house and I get to decide what goes on here. Perhaps you could pick a different movie for us to watch together. Otherwise we'll have to play a game or something else like that. Which would you like?"
I'm really sorry you're going through this...been there myself. :/
Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001
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A little calmer now... This is the same guy who last week told me he wanted to take the child to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show. I told him absolutely not.
The whole thing is annoying because little guy is SUCH a pain when he doesn't get enough sleep, and it was a really inappropriate movie.
It has occured to me that he is trying to be Little Guy's buddy instead of his father, probably not that he is trying to annoy me necessarily. He just... doesn't use his brain.
What I've decided to do is point out to the Ex that it is a rated R movie... he MAY not realize it, he is none too observant and be glad for the millionth time that the guy who most often serves as the adult male role model is my dad since we live with him.
Thanks for "listening"
Posts: 772 | Registered: Feb 2005
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posted
When my kid was 8 or 9, my father took him out to the movies to see (if I recall correctly) Godzilla, which was rated PG-13. At the time, I did not allow my kid to see movies rated above PG, unless my husband or I had pre-screened it, and even then, we would watch it with him. My son felt that the movie was too violent and inappropriate and insisted on leaving the theater.
I just loved him for that.
Of course, this helps you not at all with your situation. Except that when my father told me that my son refused to stay in the theater, I reminded him that the movies usually have their ratings for a reason, and that it would be best to check the rating first before taking the kid out to the movies again.
He hadn't noticed the rating. After that, he made a point to not only check the rating, but also ask me or my husband if we thought that the choice was appropriate for the kid.
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and be glad for the millionth time that the guy who most often serves as the adult male role model is my dad since we live with him.
