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Author Topic: Down With The British!
BlackBlade
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Happy Fourth of July everybody!

Y'all can thank me on behalf of my ancestors for creating the first permanent* American colony (William Bradford) and Cpt. Daniel Clark for fighting in the Battle of Saratoga and securing French support, which lead to final victory at Yorktown.

Like good Americans I am skipping the parade this year as I felt no desire to stake out a seat last night, but there will be copious amounts of BBQ and fireworks.

Try not to tread on anything. [Smile]

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Lyrhawn
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Y'all can thank ME on behalf my MY ancestors for providing that French support. [Smile]

I pay homage on this Fourth of July to first among equals, my favorite Founding Father, John Adams.

Without him, the Fourth of July would be just a date on the calendar.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Yall can thank my ancestors for moving here from Sweden in 1800s because otherwise you would be deprived of my wisdom and wit. Or not, as they have been dead for quite awhile.

Either way, happy birthday America!

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Obama
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You know, I could have sworn the 4th was about celebrating America's independence, not about hating British people, but whatevs.

Happy 4th, everyone.

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Lyrhawn
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I love the present day British. I'm caught up in third wave invasion music. But we can still talk trash to King George.
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Obama
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Yeah, you're right, my bad. I didn't notice that the thread title was "Down with King George."
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Kwea
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I'd ask if you could be more snide (for less reason) but I am afraid you might attempt it.

Happy 4th of go away.

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Obama
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Middle finger right back atcha, Kwea.
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Xavier
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The "down with the British" statements and the like are always done with tongue firmly planted in cheek, "Obama". There's very little anti-British sentiment in the US, at least not for the last 150 years or so. At least not that I've ever seen.

So taking exception to such an obvious joke just makes you look silly. Like posting in a "Happy Turkey Day!" thread a lecture about how some families don't eat turkey on Thanksgiving or something.

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Wingracer
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Yeah I don't think there is really any anti-British sentiment in the US these days. I mean you pretty much have to be British to get an acting job in Hollywood, all the best TV shows are British, we love British beer, the only thing we don't care for is British cuisine. [Big Grin]
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BlackBlade
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Obama: Definitely no true offense intended. It's just a phrase popular during the revolution that is very long passed its' expiration date. Having grown up in what was a British colony until 1997 I have nothing but fond feelings for it.
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Sa'eed
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Down with the British indeed.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edZjdgU0asM

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Lyrhawn
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I'm not a big fan of the whole "they conquered my ancestors" thing, but I got over it.
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Stone_Wolf_
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quote:
Originally posted by Wingracer:
...the only thing we don't care for is British cuisine. [Big Grin]

Not even actual Britts like English food. True story.
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Kwea
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See...I was right. You attempted it. And failed, as you usually do at most things. Things like carrying on a civil conversation, appearing intelligent, and making others care about your opinion even a little bit.

Congrats!

(That's how to be snide. Keep practicing, grasshopper)

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Obama
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Gosh, as much as I'd love to get into a passive aggressive insult consult that results in me getting banned, I think I'll pass, thanks. I'll keep you in mind for next time, though, as you appear to be quite easy to provoke, and it doesn't even require someone insulting your nationality. (Stone Wolf - British cuisine tastes just fine. In fact, there's a thriving mom and pop shop in my neighborhood that sells exclusively British food.)

Blackblade, I know there was no ill will meant. Was just a friendly reminder that this is an international forum.

In a train car there were an Englishman, an American, a spectacular looking blonde and a frightfully awful looking fat lady. After several minutes of the trip the train happens to pass through a dark tunnel, and the unmistakable sound of a slap is heard. When they leave the tunnel, the American had a big red slap mark on his cheek.

1. The blonde thought - "That American son of a ***** wanted to touch me and by mistake, he must have put his hand on the fat lady, who in turn must have slapped his face".

2. The fat lady thought - "This dirty old American laid his hands on the blonde and she smacked him".

3. The American thought - "That ******* Englishman put his hand on that blonde and by mistake she slapped me".

4. The Englisman thought - "I hope there's another tunnel soon so I can smack that stupid American again".

----

It is said that Mohandas Ghandi was asked, "What is your opinion of American civilization?"

His reply: "I think it would be an excellent idea."

-----
Three men were standing on a magic carpet. One was English, one was French, and the third was American. This magic carpet made anyone who was standing on it disappear if they told a lie. The Englishman said, " I think I'm the most handsome man in the world!" and he vanished. The Frenchman said, " I think I am the strongest man in the world!" and he vanished too. Then the American man said, " I think-" and he vanished too.

----

Your mother's so fat, she's probably an American.

[ July 05, 2013, 03:58 PM: Message edited by: Obama ]

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Lyrhawn
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The second two make sense, the second one is even clever.

But the first one just make British people sound like douchebags.

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Obama
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The first one is not the cleverest, true, but it's more amusing if you come from a culture where American's are looked down on and disrespected, even if it's only for one day a year.
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Lyrhawn
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Looks like it's time to dust off my maple leaf when I travel abroad.
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Obama
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I visited England to see relatives right around the time the Iraq War disaster was really kicking into high gear. I have an American accent, and I ended up just taking my British passport with me to bars to get people off my back.
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Rakeesh
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Remember, it was totally a friendly reminder. Not a snide remark offering an insult when it was known no offense was meant (or even offered, really), which everyone on reading it didn't realize and have confirmed by the list of jokes.

Quit whining, 'Obama'. Perhaps with a different reputation your remark would've been taken in the spirit you claim it was meant, but that's your own fault.

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Obama
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You mean all of the Americans reading it, right, "Rakeesh?"

It's not like I said my bit, then said it's whatever, and wished everyone a happy 4th, is it?

I'm interested to see, though, that the worthiness or lack thereof in a joke depends entirely on the intent that the joker has. I've never really believed that, myself, but it's an interesting perspective and I'll be sure to remember you raising it in future conversations about offensive jokes.

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TomDavidson
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quote:
(Stone Wolf - British cuisine tastes just fine. In fact, there's a thriving mom and pop shop in my neighborhood that sells exclusively British food.)
British puddings are okay. The British, on the other hand, have no idea what good baked beans taste like -- thinking, for reasons that I cannot comprehend, that our Heinz exports are the gold standard here -- and do truly terrible things to vegetables in general. They also seem to think that all sauces should be either ketchups or brown gravies, something that they've sadly passed on to our Canadian neighbors.

Britain is the only country I've ever visited that has attempted to serve me a pot pie inverted in a bowl of salty green pea soup and topped with ketchup.

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Obama
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Mmmmmm. Beans on toast. And I happen to like mushy pease. [Wink]

A lot of the British food that gets derided is basically food that became popular because it was what poor people had to make due with. It's a little like saying Southern food is atrocious because they eat chitlins and pig's feet, while ignoring the pure awesomeness that is barbeque.

I will admit that the obsession with ketchup is concerning. But again, ketchup is a cheap way to add flavor to a dish.

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Mucus
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Yeah, that's not it. Many food cultures like Chinese or French have a rich tradition of "poor people's" food, but they don't get the special (And IMO, totally deserved) ribbing that British food does.

British food is just uniquely awful and to add insult to injury, fairly expensive as a visitor.

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Obama
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Eh, there's no accounting for taste.

There are quite a few British restaurants in the states, though, considering how objectively awful British food is supposed to be.

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Wingracer
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quote:
Originally posted by Obama:
Eh, there's no accounting for taste.

There are quite a few British restaurants in the states, though, considering how objectively awful British food is supposed to be.

Yeah, I had a pub down the street that made some fantastic fish and chips but I really don't think of battered fish and french fries as a uniquely British food. The next best things on the menu were a cheeseburger and a calzone. [Big Grin]
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Darth_Mauve
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British restaurants are known for there beer, not their food.

Though in Germany once I had a great meal they called English--it was Boiled Beef in Horseradish Sauce. The horseradish sauce kept my sinus clear for 3 and a quarter months.

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Lyrhawn
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I can't stand most British beers. Too bitter.

German wheats are my sweet spot.

On the other hand, British hard ciders are the best in the world.

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Stone_Wolf_
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I love me some hard cider! What brand is the best Britt one?
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TomDavidson
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Hey, SW, just FYI: it's "Brit." "Britt" is a name.
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Stone_Wolf_
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Phone autocorrect [Wink]
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Lyrhawn
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quote:
Originally posted by Stone_Wolf_:
I love me some hard cider! What brand is the best Britt one?

My favorite is Bulmer's, but it also sells under the name Magner's in Ireland, and Strongbow in America.

Strongbow is your best name to look for in the States.

It's been big across the sea for a long time, but hard cider is just now becoming a major thing in America.

I've tried dozens of different kinds, and I've found some pretty good ones, but I think the problem with American hard ciders is they are too sweet. Angry Orchard is a popular one, so is Red's Apple Ale (which is pretty good), but too sweet, they taste like apple juice.

English ciders have a good hard bite to them, which is what you want in a hard cider. I love going to specialty stores and trying the various kinds from around the country. And I love that cider mills and wineries are starting to make them.

Woodchuck is probably the one that hast the best market penetration in the US, but it's flavored water compared to what you can get in a specialty store or even well-stocked grocery store.

ETA: Most of the major beer companies are starting to produce their own mass produced ciders. Sam Adams makes Angry Orchard, and it's okay, but there are much better ones. Michelob makes an "Ultra Light Cider" that's surprisingly good. It has a nice biting green apple cider taste. It's the most apple-flavored thing I've come across, and if you like that nice strong taste, it's nice.

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Stone_Wolf_
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Thanks, I'll keep my eyes open for them!

I'm quite fond of Hornsby's green. Although my favorite is the cider on tap at Dargen's Irish pub in Ventura. My wife and I had our first ever date over two pints of Dargen's.

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kmbboots
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Try Crispin. They have several different varieties and are probably my favourite so far. I like Angry Orchard pretty well. Original Sin is good as well.

I am not a beer drinker so I am delighted at the burgeoning popularity of cider. Used to be you could only get Magners.

[ July 09, 2013, 01:59 PM: Message edited by: kmbboots ]

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Stone_Wolf_
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Just had some Crispin! Really liked it. Ditto about not liking beer.
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Jake
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quote:
Originally posted by Lyrhawn:
It's been big across the sea for a long time, but hard cider is just now becoming a major thing in America.

Early on hard cider was huge over here, but it fell out of vogue ages ago and is just now making a comeback.

quote:
My favorite is Bulmer's, but it also sells under the name Magner's in Ireland, and Strongbow in America
Interesting! Strongbow is my wife's go-to alcoholic beverage, but I had no idea that it was just a rebranding of an English cider. I wonder if she's aware of it.
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kmbboots
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quote:
Originally posted by Jake:

quote:
My favorite is Bulmer's, but it also sells under the name Magner's in Ireland, and Strongbow in America
Interesting! Strongbow is my wife's go-to alcoholic beverage, but I had no idea that it was just a rebranding of an English cider. I wonder if she's aware of it.
It is a bit more complicated than that. Magners and Bulmers are different companies. Magners sells Bulmers in Ireland but can't call it Bulmers in the US (because it only bought the Irish trademark rights) so it calls it Magners here. Bulmers makes Strongbow.

ETA: I spend far too much time in Irish pubs. Clearly.

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Lyrhawn
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I like Crispin. It's a highly rated cider.

A couple major labels just released new cider lines, like Stella Artois, which is hoping to catch the wine and beer drinking markets with its higher class entry.

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Noemon
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Wow, that's convoluted. Thanks Kate!
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kmbboots
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As I am being reminded, Magners gives me a headache. Other ciders (even Magners Pear) don't. I don't mean the next day hangover headache. I get a headache as I am drinking it.
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Lyrhawn
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That's odd. Any idea what could cause that kind of reaction?
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Wingracer
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I am highly susceptible to dehydration headaches so it's not uncommon for one or two drinks at the end of a hot day to give me a headache but any alcohol will cause that.

I do have a friend that has some sort of allergy or something (I can't remember exactly what she said it was) and gets headaches from most beers. Only most wheat beers and a few selected types of regular beers don't effect her.

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Teshi
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I'm not offended [Big Grin] . Happy very belated July 4th America!

quote:
Originally posted by Stone_Wolf_:
quote:
Originally posted by Wingracer:
...the only thing we don't care for is British cuisine. [Big Grin]

Not even actual Britts like English food. True story.
Brits.

Assuming British food is:
- Roast meat, potatoes
- Boiled/roast vegetables.
- Pies
- Fatty herby sausages
- Thick soups.

I like well made versions of these things. I do not like poorly made versions of these things.

One thing that coloured the International opinion of British food for a long time I think was the poor quality of restaurants. Visitors of course ate in crappy pubs which did serve really crappy food and people assumed that's what British food was.

A really well made meat pie is of course delicious as it is the world over, as is a delicious roast with roast vegetables and potatoes and a lovely thick gravy.

Until very recently (last 10 years) you couldn't get good British food at 'American' prices. You still can't. You have to pay a bit more for restauarnt food here, especially in tourist locations because the rents are much higher.

quote:
Yeah, I had a pub down the street that made some fantastic fish and chips but I really don't think of battered fish and french fries as a uniquely British food. The next best things on the menu were a cheeseburger and a calzone.
Deep-fried fish and chips, unless you can think of another nationality that does them as a "national food" is a British national food.

quote:
On the other hand, British hard ciders are the best in the world
Or, as the British call them, ciders.

quote:
Interesting! Strongbow is my wife's go-to alcoholic beverage, but I had no idea that it was just a rebranding of an English cider. I wonder if she's aware of it.
This is not the case but in certain cases the confusion is somewhat warranted:

According the Magner's Wikipedia page:

quote:
Magners (or Bulmers in Ireland) is a brand of cider produced in County Tipperary, in Ireland, by the C&C Group. The Magners product range includes the cider varieties: Magners Original, Magners Light, Magners Pear and Magners Berry. The cider was originally produced as "Bulmers" and continues to be sold under that name in Ireland, although the product is no longer owned by H. P. Bulmer.
From the Bulmer's page:

quote:
Bulmers Cider is one of a number of brands owned by British cider maker H. P. Bulmer of Hereford. It is one of the leading premium British bottled cider brands in the UK with a number of variants including Bulmers Original & Pear. It should not be confused with Bulmers Irish Cider, sold outside the Republic of Ireland as Magners.
Aaand...

quote:
Strongbow is a dry cider produced by H.P. Bulmer in England since 1962. It is the world's leading cider with over 10 per cent of the global cider market, and its accounts for more than 20 per cent of all cider sold in the UK.[2][3] Bulmer's is a subsidiary of Heineken, the multinational Dutch brewer.
They are all three distinct drinks and you could buy them all in a pub and have them sitting next to one another.

My favourite is Aspalls but it's not available at every pub so I enjoy finding pubs where I can get it!

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Obama
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Yeah, the Codfather, the restaurant near me, actually imported a British fryer. I wouldn't have thought it would have made a difference, but it really does. Their chips don't taste like french fries ; they taste like *chips.*

And the sausage rolls. Oh god, how I'd missed sausage rolls. [Wink]

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Teshi
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Oh yes, sausage rolls, scotch eggs... again all things that done well are delicious, done poorly are terrible.

Certain curries... certain salads...

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