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One doesn't lightly anger a Prince, Winifred Winfield mused as he stood and strained to adjust his position in the stocks where he and his two best friends were at that moment confined.

That's a very long first sentance. "Prince" shouldn't be capitalized unless you are referring to a specific prince i.e. the Midnight Prince or Prince Phillip. Try not craming so much information in one sentance. Since you tell me his friends are there in a line or two you might not need to mention them here. It would be hookier for me if it was:
It had been a bad choice to anger Prince XY. Winifred strained . . .

There was no real way to ease his discomfort. telling me. Show me that when he moves to lessen the strain on his neck, he wrenches his shoulders
Stocks were a punishment. Well, of course. You don't need to tell me this
They were meant to be uncomfortable. Same issue
He found <-- since this is his POV, you don't need to say "he found" he envied his friends at that particular moment "At that particular moment" is probably unnecessary. Unless you tell me otherwise, I'll assume it's that moment for their drunkenness this is a bit formal, but depending on the world you are writing in, will work if the world is formal. Given the dialog with the old woman, I's not sure if this is too formal .
They hung limp in their own stocks, passed out and unaware of their confinement or the trouble they were in.

Winifred could smell vomit where Leos had emptied some of the remnants of his stomach. At the moment, it wasn't too bad. If the morning continued to warm up, however it would get much worse, but still better that, than a autumn rain which could
this isn't "bad" but I'd rather know something about who he is and what he did to end in the stocks. It seems out of POV for him to be musing about the smell of vomit if the day warms up, when you've already tried to convince me that he's in some serious trouble

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Your second and IMHO stronger "hook" - the Halfer blood - is too far down. If this gives him an advantage/ extra sense then let me know that sooner.

There's a lot of cutting you can do to hone this down to a managable bit. In the extended first 13 you posted, even after all those extra lines, all I know is your MC/POV annoyed a prince and is in the stocks, his friends are also in stocks and this old woman who's scolding him has "halfer blood" too.

Some of the information you are telling me seems to be an author intrusion or a "cheat." Why? Because if the POV is really in trouble I doubt he's going to be thinking these thoughts and "musing" about everything except how to get the heck out of trouble. If the POV isn't really at risk, then you've set up a false sense of suspense and underminded my trust/faith in your storytelling.

There's lots of promise here, just trim to make the story as lean and clean as possible.

Your new version is 4 lines too short.

Go ahead and put in a few more lines and if it's too long, I'll cut it again.

Sorry it's such a hassle.

Now let me give you my take on your revision.

Winfred Winfield stumbles in my brain. This is probably your intention but it is so jarring that more than a few people are going to be put off by it.
Then their is the opening two lines...

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We should never have angered Prince Scanlen, Winifred Winfield thought as he stood and strained...

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This is probably more of my personal nit but I think a story is a lot smoother with as few speech and thought tags as possible. I think this would be better if you italicised the first line then cut the tag.

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We should never have angered Prince Scanlen.
Winifred Winfield strained on his tip toes reaching to adjust his position in the stocks. He managed once again to gouge his neck on the splinters of the rough wood.[/i]

'as he stood' isn't needed since he is 'on his tip toes'. Difficult to get on your toes with out standing.

[quote]You would think they would at least have given me a Halfer's stool to stand on.

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This reads like an active thought (at least I hope it is) so it should be treated like dialog. italicise this as well. 'You would think they would' is a bit too wordy for me. Try to shorten it. How about...

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I wish they at least gave me a Halfer's stool to stand on.

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He envied his friends for their drunkenness. They hung limp in their own stocks, passed out and unaware of their confinement or the trouble they were in.

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This paragraph is fine. A bit telling but I don't have a problem with it. Maybe cut 'their confinement or' because it is redundant because we already know they are confined.

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At the moment it wasn't too bad. If the morning continued to warm up, however it would get much worse, but still better that, than a autumn rain which could make their confinement not only much more uncomfortable, but could lead them to catching their death of an ague.

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This could be cut down to size as well

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At the moment it wasn't too bad, but if the morning continued to warm up it could get worse. Still better than an autumn rain. Their confinement would not only get more uncomfortable, but could lead them to catching their death.

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A novel's hook isn't as crucial as a short story but the editior may make a hasty assumption on your level of skill if they see problems with style and things like redundancy. This read like you were on the verge of repeating yourself. Not a bad read though, I found it interesting enough to keep reading for now.