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Author Topic: It's almost a new year, and we have many new friends, so...
mikemunsil
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Member # 2109

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There are many benefits to belonging. Among them is that paragon of tools, the starting-to-be-more-than-just-slightly-little-known, and infamous Hatrack Utility Belt.

Here are just some of the features of the HUB:

Proximity Alarm - for POV shifts

Hatrack Pen/Glowing Blade of Words – slices through logical conundrums with appalling ease!

Furry Dice - used to stun the reader with a superfluosity of adjectives. Sometimes called "Fuzzy Dice" by Hatrackers who have not studied the Manual.

Universal Travel Guide – Instant information for any place a Hatracker might find herself, hisself, or itself.

Spell-checker – works in the backgrond but
cannot read your mind.

The Deus Ex Machina attachment – For last resort only! A glass tube about four inches long and an inch in diameter; marked "EMERGENCY USE ONLY. Does anything you want.
Geiger counter – only field tested on felines, so far.

Infinitive Splitter – Has a large blast radius. An awesome tool!

BS Detector – Everyone needs one.

'Handwavium' pellets - Really useful for getting through sticky science scenes.

A bosun’s whistle to summon the The Penmanship, the Hatrack sloop. Ably manned by Survivor.

Invisibility booster – most of us don’t need it.

The Ultimate Weapon - The ultimate weapon for a Hatracker caught in a dilemma in any thread. - A small black lock.

Rising Action switch - can help elevate you in a situation but be sure you can get to a safe place before you reach the top of the story arc or you'll crash to the ground

Levity Belt attachment - this should only be used in a comical situation otherwise you'll go over like a lead baloon in a serious situation

Instant Quotations - for nailing down a point.

The k d-w. - Pull it out and it throws a stern admonition that instantly sets you back on course. Make sure not to throw a KDW instead, or you will be catapulted willynilly into the future!!

Hatrack Ray-Gun with attachments
Hyphenator: used to break-things-up
Procrastinator: used to slow things down
Punctuator: used to punch-up things that appear flat or life-less! (Works well when used with hyphenator)
Excelerator: used to create graphs which act as webs or nets, trapping people and things until the graph is deciphered

Also, each set of Furry Dice should come with a warning label. If you received yours without one it should read as follows:

quote:
Use with caution. Furry Dice may result in the creation of a Tom Swifty demon. This small boy grows quickly and can easily take-over your taglines, cluttering them with adjectives and said-bookisms. Tom Swifty is often dressed entirely in black and he carries a small pouch of dust to litter your lines.

Another Ray-Gun attachment:
The Incredible Coincidence generator. Shoot someone and see what happens. You'll be amazed!

****************
NEW
The HUB 1.2 with Disbelief Suspenders!

(ooooohhh, aaaaahhh)

These handy, dandy accessories come in a variety of colours and styles, guarenteed to match any wardrobe. Use the suspenders on their own to add enjoyment to any flight of fancy you may encounter. Or wear them with your HUB and use them to help hold-up the disbelief in your own writing.

Already own the HUB 1.1? Do you only want the Disbelief Suspenders?

Not a problem! Redeem your Hatrack points for any HUB upgrade. Including a lovely set of Furry Dice (available in jet black, Mary-Kay pink, or winter white), or, the Hatrack ray-gun and attachments.

Don't delay, get yours today!


EDITED to ensure that people realize that this list grew from the fertile imaginations of many people and that I have just collated the information. mm

[This message has been edited by mikemunsil (edited December 28, 2004).]


Posts: 2710 | Registered: Jul 2004  | Report this post to a Moderator
Keeley
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Member # 2088

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Will the next version come with a Conflict Initiator, useful for shocking a plotline into life?
Posts: 836 | Registered: Jul 2004  | Report this post to a Moderator
HuntGod
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Does it have a Pointer of Ellipses?

Posts: 552 | Registered: Dec 2004  | Report this post to a Moderator
goatboy
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You have forgotten the towel. (According to Douglas Adams, you should never leave home without one.)
Posts: 497 | Registered: Jun 2004  | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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