There are books out that tell you about how people behave at certain ages - I have one called "Character Traits" by Linda N. Edelstein, PhD, that covers the various traits of lots of ages and personalities, as well as the ways things that happen in life impact people's personalities (such as having a child, having more than one child, adopting a child, etc.)

Think about a man in his twenties. He's just finished college and is beginning his career (perhaps). Maybe he's also a newlywed. He and his bride are furnishing their first apartment with hand-me-downs from their parents and things bought at the Salvation Army, and it's FUN for them because they're establishing their household. While these are fun and exciting things, they're also stressors on his life that he'll have to deal with.

Same man, in his thirties. He has a nice house in the suburbs, he and his wife both have fairly new cars, they're successful and happy, his career is going well, then suddenly he's laid off, downsized, etc. He has three kids in private school who will now have to go to public school. Maybe he got one of those adjustable rate mortgages and they lose their home.

Same man, in his forties. He either found a new job or changed careers (possibly requiring more education or retraining - doing homework when you have kids at home is a REAL stressor!) During this decade, his kids will be in high school with all the high fees required for band, sports, etc. He'll have to decide if he's willing to let his daughter go on a school trip to Europe - and if he can afford to pay the costs involved. He has to have the "grownup" version of the bird and bees talk with his kids. He has to figure out how to pay for them to go to college (if he didn't start planning this years ago), and what he's willing to agree to when they start choosing colleges. Will he let them go to school 1000 miles away? Think of the costs that will add, not to mention not being able to get to them quickly in an emergency! This man is now at the peak of his professional abilities, perhaps a division manager or vice president of a company.

Same man in his fifties. By now, the kids are away in college, or perhaps off on their own. "Empty nesting" can be fun if he and his spouse have kept their marriage alive, but if, like many parents, they've poured all their energies into their kids, their marriage may be dead beyond all reviving. They may work on reviving the marriage and find it's a lot of fun - or their eyes may wander. They may have to pay for their daughter's wedding sometime in their 40's or 50's - they need to decide how much they're willing to spend on it, whether they're willing to take out a loan, dip into savings, only pay what they can afford, or tell their daughter to pay for it herself.

Somewhere between his 40s and 50s this man may have a "mid-life crisis." He may react to it by buying an expensive sports car, or starting to gamble, or having an affair. Or he may just go into a depression for a while.

While all this is going on, his wife is going through similar things.

In my opinion, you would create a 20 year old character if they are to be of child-bearing age (going to have a romance, first married, etc.), and if they are in their 30's they or their peers would probably have children. A lot is going to depend on the historic era and culture you are trying to emulate, and of course for sci-fi all can be out the window.

I suppose once you get old enough, that might not apply anymore. Is there really that big a difference bewteen 100 and 110? I won't know that for another 80 years.

In my published novel, "Touch of Fate," I chose a woman in her late 30's because I wanted her to have a teenage daughter. (The daughter is the catalyst for the character change aspect of the story.) I also wanted her to have lived some life and been effected by it.

I've got two works in progress right now -- in one I have a teenager as the MC. She needs to be young, inexperienced, a bit of a victim at first, and then grow through the events in the story. That is harder to pull off with someone in their 20's, 30's, 40's.

In the other, my MC is 130. (Long-lived human society.) I made her that age in part to help the reader understand the world. She's experienced, toughened, cynical, and a force that drives the story forward.

I get irritated at feeling like there is pressure to write about kids. I don't like to. I have three novels with late adolescent MCs. I won't to do another one even if it loses sales.

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I made one story with the main character as a leader of a society. I had her in her forties, and now I have a another WIP with a younger character. The main problem was that they seemed to act very similar. I had asked the question to see what others thought about the age question. I see the points that you have made will have to think about it.

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I'm not sure what role the younger character plays in her story, but someone who is the leader of a society will probably act differently from most people, even if they are exactly the same age.