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Author Topic: Lennon's Law and the return to Babel
tnwilz
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Lennon's Law and the return to Babel

Thats the title of my latest short. But I have recently come to realize how important the title is. So help me out here. What are you expecting from this story title? would it arouse your curiosity over other titles in a collection of shorts?

Tracy

[This message has been edited by tnwilz (edited March 31, 2008).]


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annepin
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Yeah, I think it would. I like the contrast between the more modern, pop-cultural reference (Lennon as in John Lennon, right?) and the biblical. In forming titles I generally prefer shorter ones, but in selecting them, I don't seem to have that bias.
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Wolfe_boy
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Reading this title, I'm looking for some sort of Murphy's Law, but pertaining to John Lennon.

And, the return to Babel reminds me of either heading back to the theater during a screening of the recent movie Babel, or some sort of spiritual journey to the ruins of a once towering structure in an attempt to illustrate the cultural similarities between people regardless of language barriers.

Or something like that.

Jayson Merryfield


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Toby Western
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I like “Lennon’s Law” and “Return to Babel” as titles, the latter of which tempts me to reminisce about a book called “Babel-17” (Delany?). I’m less sure about “Lennon’s Law and the return to Babel”, though.

In general, I like my story titles short and equivocal. You know those ads for medication they sometimes run, where the condition is so awful that it can’t be named – not even on commercial television? So they show a shot of a windmill against a beautiful sunset and a deep soothing voice says something utterly cryptic like “Parallax Spray”.

That kind of title.

Edit: Got to rambling and forgot to answer the question. From your title, I’d be expecting a short and fairly tongue-in-cheek piece, possible inspired by a line from “In His Own Write”, with a focus on language and how it helps (or hinders) understanding.

Oh, and one day someone must write a story about Khol's Law!

[This message has been edited by Toby Western (edited March 31, 2008).]


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Bent Tree
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I might expect a story telling how the unity of man to discover "gods" led them to a great discovery of the race that created them.

Lenno like so many other brilliant revolutionary people were in fact of this race, set here to test the waters for evolutionary and social advancements. At times they have led us and at times they have been killed because the intended change was not meant to be

But for what purpose? I can't have just a title. My mind wanders and wonders too much.

I dunno. It makes you think. I wouldn't expect anything specific except for a brilliant story. It is something that I would read if I were perusing titles. It would then be your responsinility not to let me down.


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tnwilz
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OK this is the setting that goes to this title.

The clerics and extremists feel their power and influence fade as the Middle East drifts (slowly) towards genuine democracy. Better economy, education, opportunity are pulling at the Islamic masses, once easily controlled minds. With nothing left to lose they unitedly attack western society. They want to break the west so they hit economic targets. Public transport, public places, stadiums, malls. Paris, Rome, London, LA, Madrid, Sydney, NewYork, Washington, Tokyo. The terrorists accelerate their campaign, spirited on by success after success. The Governments are overwhelmed by an unseen enemy. The governments are impotent, hamstrung by their own laws and rules and supposed moral code. Politicians around the globe huddle and bicker as they agree on nothing. The death toll breaks 30,000 in the west. The financial infrastructure becomes unstable as stadiums and trains and planes and even movie theaters empty out. But this is a new generation. Today’s teenagers, who revel in virtual violence, are the young adults of tomorrow. And so the CTC is born. Christian Terrorist Crusade. Hundreds of thousands of young men from every corner of western society attend illegal virtual terrorist training camps. Countless vets join up bringing real expertise. In five years the middle east is decimated by the well funded and now, ruthless CTC. The great cities of the middle east, only shells of a once proud people. Their already third world infrastructure shredded by daily colossal explosions that take out every utility and monument. Tehran is awash with radiation after several suitcase bombs crush entire city blocks. Pakistan is easily overrun by Indian forces that quickly find their mission to be hugely humanitarian rather than a land grab. Turkey learns from India’s experience and stays well clear of Iraq’s starving masses. The world terrorist war, as it has come to be known, is over in six years. Over three million dead and countless more dying or starving. The boys of the west slip home as covertly as they had left. The weary politicians seeking to re-establish their power base speak openly at the UN about how this can never happen again. Two thirds of the member countries agree to Lennon’s law. The US eventually concedes and backs the new UN membership law. Religion is now ILLEGAL. The world has come back to the tower of Babel. They are united against GOD. Whoever he may be.


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Wolfe_boy
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Alright, so this world is interesting, though more than a little distasteful. You still haven't told us what Lennon's Law is yet. I this the law that makes religion illegal? There are a few holes here that would need closing.

1. The UN is not a law-making body.

2. In the Tower of Babel, everyone was building it, not just two thirds of the people.

3. The tower of Babel wasn't a union against God. The tower itself was to honor a false god.

4. Terrorist organizations don't tend to put terrorist into their names.

5. People of Arabic descent immigrating to Western Countries isn't something out of the ordinary. American Southerners (where I presume the bulk of this CTC to be from, since religious motivations aren't nearly as common in other parts of the western world) immigrating to Saudi Arabia or Iran is quite strange, especially en masse.

But, it's your story. Still, that's an awful lot of back story to work into a short. Careful how you go about it.

Jayson Merryfield


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Bent Tree
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It will be hard to fit so much politics into a short.

This is as Wolfe mentioned close to home. Which is to say enough people know enough about most of the aforementioned groups and history that it would have to at least seem correct. The historical fiction rules also apply in some way to the future. What we already know will not change drastically for a story. We have heard and read about these things all our lives.

It seems a complicated plot for a short.


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tnwilz
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Yes, Lennon's law is no religion.

This isn’t the story, its the setting for a story involving an MC in this, not so distant, future. The setting is explained in less than 500 words.

The UN isn’t a law making body but they do agree on what international laws member nations need to abide by to be members. It’s an evolutionary extension of the UN as it exists now and how it may change to apprehend a world devastating terrorist war.

The CTC would have members from all across Europe, South and Central America who would easily blend into the Middle East. Not just UK and US. Entering those countries through their wide-open boarders would be no issue. If you have vets from multiple trained armies from multiple countries including the former Soviet Union, Serbia, Spain, Italy, Israel ... you name it, the experience and know how is there. These are highly trained people run amuck who has one common enemy. Indeed if such a thing were to evolve many would come from those places to join an exciting illegal war against an enemy that had earned the world's hatred.

On the Babel thing, I was leaning towards the idea that God had confused their languages to decimate their unity. In fact the Bible pointedly states that. He recognized that if he did not scatter them to the four corners of the earth they would become a serious threat to his purpose far too early in his schedule. (My interpretation.) The ruler of Babel was of course Nimrod who is described as a mighty hunter in opposition to god. Absolutely, the original builders were the founders of the Babylonian religion, but it the religion didn’t evolve till Babel became Babylon hundreds of years later. For me Babel represents opposition to God and such arrogance as to try to build stairs into his realm in heaven. Obviously this position is arguable.

I thought about calling it the Christian Terrorist Crusade. But I figure that their attitude would be, “We’ll show you how to conduct a terrorist war and we won’t put any fancy names on it. You’ll get exactly what you wished on us.” I could see how they might embrace the word, as it would be a completely illegal but probably unstoppable war.


Tracy


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Wolfe_boy
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Heh... This is kind of funny....

quote:
But I figure that their attitude would be, “We’ll show you how to conduct a terrorist war and we won’t put any fancy names on it. You’ll get exactly what you wished on us.” I could see how they might embrace the word...

Could you imagine a current islamic group called the Holy Muslim Western Imperialists? Maybe the Yankee Doodle Jihadists? In the west, in general, terrorism isn't a word you associate with in a positive way, unless you jam on that good ol' prefix, Anti-.

Hey, I'm not trying to tell you how or what to write, just mentioning a few things I see that an editor is sure to wonder about. Of course, there's an awful big issue, made even bigger in your last post...

quote:
The setting is explained in less than 500 words.

Now, your first post about the background is 391 words, followed by 349 words of clarification. That's 740 words already, and were they included in a form even slightly resembling what I've read so far, the term info-dump would most assuredly apply. I'm not critiquing your idea, or the work you've done thus far, but merely offering the same warning I offered before - careful how you go about it. You've clearly put a lot of thought into this, and an attempt to compress it into 5,000 words or so might not do it justice. That being said, I don't actually know what the story you'll be telling is, how important the background is to the story, how much background knowledge will be required of a reader....

And, to refer to your original question, about the appropriateness of our title - well, I don't really care for it too much. It's a little too literal, vis a vis what you actuall put into your story. Sometimes being a little more abstract goes a long way. Which movie would you rather see: Star Wars, or Luke's X-Wing vs. The Death Star? No Country for Old Men, or How to kill people in the New Mexico Desert with an oxygen tank for fun and profit?

On second thought, that last one sounds kind of interesting.

Jayson Merryfield

[This message has been edited by Wolfe_boy (edited April 01, 2008).]


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tnwilz
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Certainly it has a negative connotation. That’s the point. It is the tactic that they have used on the west and everyone has called it terrorism. It is a type of warfare. It is the type of warfare most commonly used by independent splinter groups and most admit they are using terrorist tactics. No government army ever says they are a terrorist army. But I am not talking about a government army. I am talking about an illegal renegade army. The name CTC is intended to convey to the enemy that they will get what they dished out even though they had tried to hide the tactic in some other high sounding name. A legal army would never use the term, you’re right. But an illegal group, out to make a point, might embrace the name to help make the point that they will give back what was given. The Irish Republican Army for example was fighting a government and was basically ashamed of their tactics and tried to justify what they did as necessary for the cause. The illegal CTC are not fighting a government. They are fighting terrorist groups by destroying their home. It is their intension to call a spade a spade and not hide behind a name that’s sounds like something other than what it is. It is essentially fighting fire with fire mixed with vengeance. In this scenario, where a group is openly and purposefully using terrorist tactics in retaliation for like acts, they would have no qualms about using the name. The name is to expose the truth - that the west is unofficially done turning the other cheek.

As for info dump. It is a preface and it is nowhere near 700 words. It is an interesting 350 word preface - a common practice in the craft that serves to draw the reader in if it’s done well. I quite enjoy stories with a preface, as they tend to answer important questions up front and avoid annoying confusion when the author is trying to invent ways to “show” everything. If your setting is somewhat complicated a preface is often the best answer. (Assuming you don’t listen to people who tell you not to even write the story because the setting is too complicated.) If it’s a 5000 word story and you spend 350 in the preface you still have 4650 word left. That’s tons for this story.


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Robert Nowall
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This is just one short?
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TaleSpinner
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quote:
What are you expecting from this story title?

I'd expect the story to allude in an authentic fashion to John Lennon's ideas on peace. If it didn't, I'd feel the title was merely designed to draw me to the story and I'd feel disinclined to trust the narrator.

Hope this helps,
Pat


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Patrick James
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Is the song Imagine what prompted this Lennon's law idea?

[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited April 03, 2008).]


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tnwilz
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Yes its the song that caused the media to dub it Lennons law.

[This message has been edited by Kathleen Dalton Woodbury (edited April 03, 2008).]


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Kathleen Dalton Woodbury
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Please very careful about quoting song lyrics. The record companies are extremely vicious about protecting copyright in connection with them.
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