posted
well, hello. this is going to be the first post attributed to me. i can be known as resnos. i have been known as other stuff, but resnos is acceptable to me.
i think i will now bless you with a rather long and not particularily interesting bit of writing by me. i have been wanting to share this in some forum where people who could appreciate it could appreciate it, so i hope i have found success at last.
i've got an aching in my hand. a longing for release that will never come. the perscription is easily carried out, but the consequences are more than i can bear. but it still won't go away. i clench my fingers into and out of a fist, but it keeps lurking, an unwelcome inhabitant of my mind. only one way to ameliorate this disease exists. i thought that writing this would make it go away, but it still persists. the benefits are outweighed and yet it is still so tempting. i want it to stop, but would i feel empty once it is gone. why not just let it sit in the cockles of consciousness and occassionally accept its maddening lure to itch. itching it won't make it leave. that i have tried. only one cure. only one way to do it. the possibility of finally ending this is enticing, but what if i do it wrong. would it only get worse while a new and glorious pain meant to heal lies wasted. futile only in the sense that it isn't gone. a failure, yes, but one that forges a way for later attempts. still no better, only more aggravating. one swift motion is all it would take. a way to save the rest of me, but society has already taught me to take care with such thoughts. keep them to myself, no one else wants to hear it. leave them uncovered so they won't disturb others. why not just push aside those thoughts, they would say, keep them away, we have no use for them. my answer to them is i have, and i am tired of succumbing to their demands. it's time to take a stand, an outcry for freedom. but this is only a selfish freedom from the ache in my hand. not one that will be heeded. if i thought one might, i would explain the extracation process, but who would i be kidding if i did. maybe some one would read it and be the better for it, though maybe all that would happen is the same as with me. a worsening of the itch and a new barrier to truely healing it. it is an inherent ache in me that i fear destroying. how could i allow some one else to destroy their's. no explanation will be made. don't ask, you will only fail. i need to help myself in this, no other way to escape it. i probably just wrote this to scare you away. nothing wrong in that. why not leave me in my pit. it is not a pit of despair as the cliche is. it is only a pit of ache. sure, there are other ways to get rid of it, but only one designed solely for my hand. the ache in my hand is all i care to get rid of. maybe it is only pyschological, but i wouldn't understand that. even if i did, i wouldn't want to get rid of it. maybe my hand is right about something and can't communicate to me what it is. maybe i'm missing something that would illuminate some wisdom and then it would stop aching. as the ignorant fear the unknown, so i fear ending this ache. i suppose that makes me ignorant. some may say ignorance is bliss, but bliss can't be described as an ache, an ache in my hand. i know nothing good will come of it. even the cure would be catastrophic. no need to heal. no reason to want that, since i have lived so long with this. it is a part of me now, though a part of me i have despised and hidden since its beginning. why should it matter anymore. why can't i just get used to it. but it is mine and i won't share it with others. of that, i am certain.
i hope you had the time to waste if you read it all, and if not, regret is natural; learn to embrace it. if you didn't read it at all, no worries since i wasn't really expecting it to be read full through by masses.
quote:i've got an aching in my hand. a longing for release that will never come. the perscription is easily carried out, but the consequences are more than i can bear. but it still won't go away.
Well, with a riveting beginning such as this, it kept me wondering the whole way through, Moose. If it is an onanism thing, he came up with some pretty creative descriptions...
Welcome to Hatrack, resnos!
Posts: 1592 | Registered: Jan 2001
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You're just lucky that I don't carry a half-brick around; that's thirty seconds of my life I'll never see again.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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posted
If you just wanted to share that, I have been known to put the paragraph breaks for people. If you meant to put it on the Writer's workshop, you may want to give that a shake. Its in the ecru menu above, in the middle row on my machine.
Posts: 11017 | Registered: Apr 2003
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i hadn't really ever tried spell checking or doing much with that before because i pretty much wrote it and saved it for some other time. i think capitalization is a waste of time, but i guess it does help reading. i'm a fan of easier writeability since most people read words no matter what. i suppose it is mostly laziness on my part.
and for those of you who are crude and/or think everything is such, that had nothing to do with masturbation. nothing at all, though i suppose that all literature is up for personal interpretation, so if you desire to take it that way, enjoy...
posted
Res, the Onanism joke is certainly a reflection on me rather than on you. It's been an ongoing joke at Hatrack for a couple of years now, and one that I've given up distancing from myself. I hope you'll believe me that there was no accusation of any sort in my (or anyone else's) comments. I actually thought it was skillery's post that made mine funnier, or mine his. Anyway....
I assumed the original content referred to the need (as opposed to the desire) to write. The sentiment reminds me of an erstwhile Hatracker you may never meet (and thus by whom you may never be eaten). Slash the Berzerker has often spoken of the things he writes as things he must write, despite not wanting to. They're there and must be written, so he writes.
I'm not sure it's a concept that I can grasp, except by likening it to my nearly OCD-ish desire to count things.
Anyway, the latter part of my post was most sincere -- the warmest of welcomes to this forum.
quote:i hadn't really ever tried spell checking or doing much with that before because i pretty much wrote it and saved it for some other time. i think capitalization is a waste of time, but i guess it does help reading. i'm a fan of easier writeability since most people read words no matter what. i suppose it is mostly laziness on my part.
If you didn't think this worth the time to bother proofreading, even taking 30 seconds to run a simple spell-check, why should we think it is worth the time to read?
I don't normally post about grammar, punctuation, spelling, or capitalization, nor worry about little mistakes in the average post. But this is offered as a work to share, and you seem to be taking a perverse pride in making us do more work so you can do less.
posted
CT, do you like ee cummings? How he got away with what he did in his poetry I don't know, but I love it every time I read it. But poetry is always a little more free-form than prose in general.
(If CT is a lover of the Dependent Clause than I'm a lover of the Tangential Idea)
(Maybe I've read one book by her? My classics are sadly lacking. Though we just re-found Plato's Republic last night in the dim recesses of a closet in a bag we thought we had emptied, along with Steve's Gaming Dice. He acted like a long lost child had been returned to him, though granted he's a longer relationship the dice than with me.)
posted
Yeah I was surpised cause I didn't have any poodles either.
On the corgis though, we will see. I may have more in a few months. Would you like to aid in a canine delivery (in a non medical capacity) around the beginning of October? (should things go to plan)
quote:CT, do you like ee cummings? How he got away with what he did in his poetry I don't know, but I love it every time I read it. But poetry is always a little more free-form than prose in general.
ee cummings was a master of the English language. When he deviated from the norms of the language, it was with purpose and was done consistently.
posted
Ooh, how convenient -- a thread to say "Hey! I'm new!" and to comment on poetry at the same time.
So, hi.
One've my favorite free verse poems is "The Hollow Men" by TS Eliot, which is too long to post here in good taste, but can be found here . And though I admit that I normally dislike changes in format, Cummings remains a dazzle of a diamond in my book. His style tends to paint a more vivid picture than the words ever could themselves.
Yours, resnos, ached as much as it interested. While the stream of consciousness-style appeals to me, it could be done just as well, if not better, with the proper formatting. In this case, it just didn't help the words convey the point at all.
And honestly, how hard can it be to hit the shift button once or twice every sentence?
[ Edited to remove an out-of-place comma that threatened my post. Crisis averted. ]
[ July 27, 2004, 02:55 PM: Message edited by: J. Alfred Prufrock ]
Posts: 13 | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
Hey, Prufrock. You'll find that we're generally a poetry-loving crowd around here; check out the "Orginal Potry Thread" (sic) for samples. Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
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posted
This forum is a joy to read. I have never seen so many people who can write intelligibly in the same place before.
It beats the weight lifting board any time.
One thing...Speaking of spell check,I haven't used my dictionary this much in a coon's age. Help! Where's the spellchecker? Posts: 16 | Registered: Jul 2004
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I got my hand slapped for expressing my opinion firmly.
/whine
Ah, well - Slash hasn't devoured me, although I did pay to be burninated. And you all let me ramble on about my l'il guy, and my new truck, and my window seat and parking spot at work . . . so, it's all good!
Welcome, res - write however you like. Folks had an initially hard time digesting fallow, but they seem to appreciate the subliminal wit that permeates his posts . . .
posted
Just to be clear, this forum isn't really populated by people who jump on tiny spelling or grammar mistakes. Sometimes we do it for fun, especially when the mistake makes an unintended joke.
The only time we do it seriously, in general, is when someone is presenting a piece of writing for public consumption and review, or when the mistakes cause general readability issues (paragraphs and capitalization).
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