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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » How to tell your mother you're dating someone you met over the Internet (Page 2)

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Author Topic: How to tell your mother you're dating someone you met over the Internet
LadyDove
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quote:
I think she probably understands that there are ways to meet people besides the old standards (work, church, introductions from friends...good; bars, tattoo parlors, arraignments...bad).
quote:
"Mom, I met someone I really like. We've been part of a large circle of friends for a little over two years, and met in Minneapolis when I was there on business. So now we're dating..."
If you throw in the whole "she is a Sunday school teacher" thing and downplay the Harley Davidson rave bit, I think you're gold!

BTW- Congratualations to the both of you. When you're next out this way, I hope to meet you both. (Is happily situated between Santa Barbara and Dana Point.) [Smile]

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zgator
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quote:
Maybe we could start a support group for moms of Jatraqueros.

That way, my mom could talk to some of them and find out this is a good thing. The other moms could say things like:

Oh, your his mother. <arches eyebrows>

or

You poor dear. I'm sure raising him was a challenge.

or

Tut, tut. I'm sure one day your son will pass Tom and amount to something.

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lcarus
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The Hatrack Mothers support group sounds like an excellent idea. I just gave my mother your mom's number.

.

.

.

I think you're disowned now, though. Sorry.

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Farmgirl
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I agree with what Rivka said first --

Have Dana there when your mom comes to visit -- introduce them and let them get acquainted before Mom learns that you met on the internet (and be honest - don't lie -- that isn't like you).

You may think that will be uncomfortable for dkw -- but remember her job entails dealing with difficult people all the time. She's a trooper -- she can handle it, AND steer the conversation. To expect anything less would be selling her short.

I think if your mom just met dkw -- then the way you and she met would end up being trivial

(spoken by a women who HAS had to introduce her mom to people she met on the net. But mom never knew about them until she met them in person -- so fears were immediately alleviated.)

Farmgirl

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TomDavidson
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*grin* I remember meeting Christy's parents for the first time. It was, quite frankly, painful; I'm a very unlikeable person in, well, person, and I think they picked up on that.
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Bob_Scopatz
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Yeah, lying isn't good.

But sticking as close to the truth as possible...now that's a goal I could live by.

[Big Grin]

[Evil Laugh]

Icarus! [Eek!]

Zgator: [ROFL]

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dkw
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So, this thread inspired me to try on my black leather dress, which I haven’t actually been able to wear for a few years, and it fits! Hurray for diet and exercise!

I will definitely wear it to meet Bob’s mom.

.

.

.

.
(Okay, it’s an ankle-length black suede jumper. Sort of Sound of Music meets biker chick.)

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sndrake
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Bob,

sticking close to the truth is good strategy, in my experience. When I first started seeing Diane, I told my parents about her law degree, her talent, her role as a director of an agency and other highly relevant and interesting information about her.

I think I probably forgot to mention she'd been arrested over 25 times. [Wink]

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celia60
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sounds perfect!
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Bokonon
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Dragon's mom should be the chairwoman of the Jatraquero Moms Support Group.

She handled herself well, and even got some Ralphie Luvin'!

-Bok

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Mama Squirrel
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Bob,

Your mom met Pop and Mooselet. Did she know you met them through Hatrack? Maybe you could lead in with that...

Hey Mom, remember Pop and Mooselet? I met this wonderful woman through the same website. We are dating now.

-Mama

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Mama Squirrel
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By the way, sometimes you can't beat around the bush.

My sister called me once on July 1st. She asked me how she should tell our parents that she would be getting married in Vegas on July 4th (to a guy my parents had never met, she met him in the military). You can't soften THAT blow.

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lcarus
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Dana, isn't that your funeral dress? [Angst]
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Bob_Scopatz
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mmm...Dana in leathers. C'mon, someone tell me I haven't just hit the jackpot!!!

[Big Grin]

[Kiss]

Okay, let's see. My mom loved Papa Moose and Mooselet. She asks about them all the time. Was thrilled to hear about Superstation. [Big Grin]

That's a great angle.

Thanks Mama Squirrel.

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Bob_Scopatz
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Licorice...um, I mean Icarus... that's not EVEN funny!

Well, okay, it was funny.

But still!
[Cry] [Cry] [Cry]

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Jenny Gardener
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You know, Bob, internet dating is just the way things are done now. My sister is 16, and all her flirting is done over IM. You don't ask for a girl's number any more, you ask for her email and screen nick. If my uber-conservative folks are okay with their baby doing digital flirting, I don't see how your mom is going to have a heart attack over this.
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dkw
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Icarus! [No No] No, it isn't.

[ March 04, 2004, 02:32 PM: Message edited by: dkw ]

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Ophelia
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quote:
quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You've Got Mail was based on The Shop Around the Corner. IMO (and no one else's) You've Got Mail is much better.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What do you mean, no one else's? I saw Shop Around the Corner the other day and not only was the girl vomit-inducing, but even poor old Jimmy Stewart couldn't keep it from being a poorly acted melodrama barely making it as a "comedy."

Incidentally, one could argue that You've Got Mail was based off of In the Good Old Summertime, which was based off of The Shop Around the Corner...it's a much smoother transition between remakes if you think of it like that. In the Good Old Summertime was good old-fashioned mushy gushy sweet stuff

I thought You've Got Mail was based on the musical She Loves Me. [Confused]
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Dan_raven
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Bob, don't worry. Introduce her to Dana and she'll never question your judgement again.

Or even better, get her to log onto Hatrack and join in the insanity (or is that join the Sanity that is Hatrack). Don't worry. We'll hid the God Says threads.

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Teshi
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Heh. My parents think that when I'm on Hatrack I'm talking to friends I know at school. Ahem.
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saxon75
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quote:
My Mom is great. Plus she has impeccable taste.
Would you say that she is the Kathleen Kelly of moms?

quote:
IMO (and no one else's) You've Got Mail is much better.
I'm reasonably certain that both OSC and my mom liked You've Got Mail better.

---------

Bob (and Dana), if you do end up going to Dana Point, make sure and let me know, as it's a pretty short drive from my place to there. Unless, of course, you two wanted your privacy. Which I can respect. I suppose.

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Leonide
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quote:
I thought You've Got Mail was based on the musical She Loves Me.
Nah, She Loves Me was actually based on Shop Around the Corner. You should rent all three one night and compare and contrast! I think In the Good Old Summertime is my favorite of the bunch...singing, Judy Garland and Van Johnson, Buster Keaton! (woot!), it's pretty darn funny, and not "hollywooded" like You've Got Mail. But you should definitely see all three.
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Dragon
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quote:
Dragon's mom should be the chairwoman of the Jatraquero Moms Support Group.

She handled herself well, and even got some Ralphie Luvin'!

[Big Grin] I showed her that. She thought it was funny and said to say that she was pleasantly suprised by the nice people she met while escorting me to the Boston get-together. (She also said, re: crazy-stalker-people, that all the people here are nerds and geeks so parents shouldn't worry [Razz] )
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Bob_Scopatz
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Well... after describing Dana to my mom, she couldn't care less HOW I met her. She loves her already.

Cool Mom! [Cool]

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rivka
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*cheers*

I'm not surprised. Considering the coolness of Bob -- which implies a likelihood of a cool mom -- and the wonderfulness of dkw, this was what had to happen.

I'm gonna have a silly grin all day again, aren't I? [Big Grin]

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Bob_Scopatz
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rivka, you are so sweet! I want to share some good deli food with you some day. I bet you know some good places we can visit when we're in your area...

[Big Grin]

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rivka
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One or two . . .




. . . in quick walking distance. More if we drive. [Big Grin]

And Dana liked the pizza place nearby, IIRC. [Smile]

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aka
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My mom thinks all internet friends are not real. She loves Saudade and Andrei, but since we know them in person now they are real. The rest of you are all just phantasms, I suppose.

For one thing, it's confusing to her how everyone has two names, how people they have their screen name and also their real names, and she can't keep people straight because of that. I do tell her all about my various friends but she will make cynical and disparaging remarks about people, putting the worst possible spin on everything, until that takes me aback so much that I just stop telling her anything. She's totally convinced that you people mostly have bad intentions, though. <laughs>

I think that's sort of sad, really. She's not like that about strangers she meets in real life. She's very friendly and always makes friends wherever she goes. She just has a really bad opinion of the internet, I have no idea why. And she really adores Saudade and Andrei, so I guess it's like any prejudice, that it doesn't apply to any of the people one actually knows, just to all the people one doesn't know yet. [Smile]

Anyway, I would never tell her I was dating someone I met online. Not unless I got engaged or something. [Smile] I guess I would have to tell her then.

[ March 05, 2004, 01:39 AM: Message edited by: aka ]

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Bob_Scopatz
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Maybe she just thinks we're all newbies compared to you.
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rivka
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I was telling a RL friend about Hatrack get-togethers, and explaining that many people will be addressed by both their "real" name and their SN.

"Oh, what do they call you?"

"Both my real name and screen name."

"What's your screen name?"

"rivka"

*confused* "How can you tell the difference?"

"Well, my real name is capitalized."

[Big Grin]

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Olivet
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LOL! Heh. That was funny, rivka. Mine is very similar to my name, too, but even Jatraqueros call me different things. Jenny G calls me "Livvy". I like it [Smile] No one else calls me that . [Smile]

aka-- I met your mom, didn't I? At the Library? [Smile]

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Bob_Scopatz
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rivka...that's hilarious.

Mine has an underscore in it.

[Big Grin]

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dkw
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[Big Grin]

When I sent you those books, I almost put the underscore in your name on the address. Since I always use “dkw” as my name in the return address, it seemed appropriate. But I didn’t.

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Bob the Lawyer
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When I was at Hatrack.ca I wound up calling Raja "twinky" more than once. Which was pretty funny considering I'd known him as Raja for 20 years and twinky for 8 months.
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Elizabeth
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Bob and DKW,
What would be cooler than to be a mom, and to hear your son say about his love interest, "I fell in love with her mind?"
Liz

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Bob_Scopatz
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Liz [Big Grin]

Did you see the other thread yet? I'd be interested in your opinion. [Big Grin] Actually, I fell in love with all of dkw, but her mind was first.

[Big Grin]


And I have a question I need to e-mail you later tonight.

[ March 05, 2004, 05:03 PM: Message edited by: Bob_Scopatz ]

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ClaudiaTherese
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Yeah, Liz ... it's so romantic. [Smile]
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Dan_raven
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I can her DKW.

"What first attrackted me to him was his threads."
"Oh, he was dressed nice?"
"No, his threads. His Begging the Question floored me, and his God threads were super."
"God threads? What is he, some diven sheep?"
"No, but he's got a talking poseable man. Well a typing one."
"Uh huh. Wait right here. The men in white coats are on the way."

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Elizabeth
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Oh, my goodness, I just read the first two pages! You two are e-vile. That was the funniest thing I have ever read, knowing that you are each other's new dates. I have no clue if I would have figured it out. Ha ha. Congratulations! And now, for a few Crow Greenspun lyrics, which just seem to fit(Bob, I hope DKW will like Crow and Donna):

When you were sixteen (insert DKW's age here)
Your power was plain
To me
The depth of your devotion
Your goodness
I admired you
And loved you
And wanted to tell you
That your kind of light
Is a blessing to the world
I knew I'd met my match
A worthy opponent
The one right voice
To play in my head
Beside my own

I am so happy for you two!

Liz

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dkw
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Dan, actually, this whole thing is a plot to get joint custody of LavaLamp. Don't tell Bob.
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Elizabeth
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Like the lyrics say, DKW: a worthy opponent. Ha ha.
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dkw
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Thanks, Liz. [Big Grin]
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Bob_Scopatz
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Uh...Dana, someone here has something to say to you...
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Lavalamp
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dkw...I will follow you to the ends of the earth...well, okay, to the ends of my cord, but I could possibly borrow a really long extension from Bob.

I love you!

I've always loved you!

Don't go with Bob. He'll just get all human on you. Go with the ooze.

[Kiss]

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dkw
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[Big Grin]

[Cool]

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ClaudiaTherese
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Awwwwww .......
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aka
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That's so cool! [Smile]

Olivia, yes that's right, you did meet my mom! That explains it, then! [Big Grin]

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Bob_Scopatz
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My brother figured it out right away. Mom told him before I could call and his reaction to the news of me dating someone 1000 miles away was "oh, I bet they met on that Orson Scott Card website."

LOL.

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