quote:Have you listened to Warren Zevon's last album? I was so impressed that he did that. Some of the songs are funny, some are heart wrenching, and he asked many of his old music compatriots to help him, so it is a star-fest.
No, I haven't heard it, but I'm definitely going to check it out soon.
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I love my family, and they mean so much to me. All of my family. For me to say that Hatrack is like family is a high complement. I am sad that so many people have such painful experiences in their family and I wish things could be different.
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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Elizabeth, I share your strong feelings about death and children. I have tried to discuss death openly with my children. For instance, we have good friends whose little 1 year old daughter had to go through open-heart-surgery. When we talked to our 5 year old son about praying for her, we were very up-front about the idea that she might die and that would make us all very sad.
I think that the funerals that I have been to have not been overly sad because of the honest-to-goodness faith of those in attendance about an afterlife. There is a certain joy and peace at these funerals, and it does feel like a celebration of their life. It is a time for family to get together and enjoy each other while discussing how wonderful the person who died was. It is a healing, beautiful time. The only sorrow is at the temporary separation. We miss them, but we are happy for them at the same time.
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Beverly, I love my family, too. They just don't seem to love each other anymore. (not my immediate family, my extended, and my hub's as well)
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I understand, Elizabeth. I'm really lucky to have the family that I do have. Certainly the people closest to you have the most opportunity to hurt you deeply, so it's not surprising that so many have been deeply hurt by even well-meaning family members.
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I have recently experienced both the best and worst of believing in heaven. During the trip to say a final goodbye to my dad-in-law, we explained to the boys that Grandpa was very sick and might die.
My 5 year old said, "He will die and go to live with God." He then went back to singing a silly song.
The simple faith and comfort of that statement awed me. There is no fear of death in this little boy. There is no fear in this little person.
Later, and quite out of the blue, he said. "Mom, I want to die." Startled and already sad, I said, "Honey, why do you say that?"
He said, "Because I want to see God and go play with Grandpa."
I know I'm selfish, but when heaven starts luring my little boy before he has even had a life, heaven scares the hell out of me.
As for the original question, I'm only interested in making sure that my kids outlive me, and I plan to live a long time.
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I really don't have much fear of death anyomore. When I was younger I did--I was terrified of it. Now, though, not so much. I'm not looking forward to the dying part, and I don't like the idea of going before my loved ones do, and having my death cause them pain. Death itself, though, doesn't hold any real terror for me. Of course, I've also never been in a position where, say, I was looking down the end of a gun or something, so it's entirely possible that this lack of fear would melt away when push came to shove.
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