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On my mother's side. He was the last of that generation in my immediate family. He was 92. It was a massive stroke, probably very fast. I don't know if I can get to his funeral. He fought at Anzio.
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Sorry to hear about your Grandfather. Please accept my sympathies. I hope you can manage to get to the funeral.
Posts: 892 | Registered: Oct 2006
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Please accept my sincere condolences. I wish for strength and comfort for you and your family in this difficult time.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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quote:Originally posted by King of Men: On my mother's side. He was the last of that generation in my immediate family. He was 92. It was a massive stroke, probably very fast. I don't know if I can get to his funeral. He fought at Anzio.
I'm sorry you won't be able to make it to his funeral. The funerals of my grandparents were wonderful experiences. I'm glad I did not miss the mixture of tears and laughter, the opportunity to be surrounded by people who also loved and missed them, and to share fond memories along with the grief.
On a side note, my husband's father also fought at Anzio, he died 17 years ago last month. In the memory of all his children and his wife, he only spoke about it once.
Posts: 12591 | Registered: Jan 2000
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KOM, May I ask why you won't be able to make it to the funeral? Is it something we might help with?
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I don't know if it will be of any comfort at this time, but 92 is a pretty good run. If you aren't able to make it to the funeral, I hope you can take the opportunity to do something affirming his memory on your own.
Posts: 11017 | Registered: Apr 2003
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My condolences and strength to you and your family. And I agree with TheRabbit, is there any way we can help you get to the funeral?
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I'm sorry for your loss, KoM. Please do let us know if there's any way we can help you get to the funeral.
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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Thank you all for your kindness. It is essentially a financial problem plus a logistical: Plane tickets on short notice are expensive, and then, there are not many flights between Cincinnati and Dundee in any case. So unless one of you owns a private jet... But thanks for the offers.
92 is indeed a good run - as my mother says, having survived five years in the Med, nothing else was going to bother him. And he went fast when he went. It's sad, but not unexpected; he had that minor stroke around Christmas, although he seemed to be recovering well from that.
My cousin, his second grandson, is off to Iraq a week after the funeral. Grandad survived the sinking of his destroyer off Crete. Let's hope the luck to survive action is passed down.
If I can't make it to the funeral, I will send a letter to be put in the coffin, instead. I don't know what to write, though.
Posts: 10645 | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:lane tickets on short notice are expensive, and then, there are not many flights between Cincinnati and Dundee in any case.
Many airlines will give you a significant discount on airfare to attend the funeral of a close family member. Don't just check the online sites, call and ask.
You will probably have to show a death certificate and the discount may not be big enough -- but its worth asking.
Posts: 12591 | Registered: Jan 2000
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KOM: I really sorry for your loss. I missed the funerals of both my grandparents on my father's side and though it was something I could not control I still wish I could have gone. I don't think any of us can tell you what you should write, but I am sure a bright guy like you, if he puts some time into it, will come up with something your grandfather would have liked to read.
92 years is a very good run, way to thumb ones nose at the average life expectancy rate for a male. To have done so dispite a World War makes it all the more impressive. Posts: 14316 | Registered: Jul 2005
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I hear you about emergency flights....my wife and I had to take one three weeks ago and it was a disaster. Her father was not expected to make it, but he rallied and is recovering.
The flights were a complete nightmare, and cost about $1000 for us to go even with the "discount" United offered, but that is a tale for another thread.
I am sorry for your loss.
As far as what to write, I can only guess, as I didn't know him, but I would just write how much he meant to me and how much I cared for him. I am sure he knew that during life, but writing it down might help you (and the rest of your family if they are allowed to read it) in this difficult time.
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It is wonderful when families lend support to each other, especially at difficult times, like yours, when the family has been diminished. I'm glad for you that you'll be able to stand with your family, and to derive and to give strength and support.
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So am I; my mother will be glad of the support. Even my sister is flying in, from Singapore no less! I must say I didn't expect that, 18 hours' flight, ouch.
Posts: 10645 | Registered: Jul 2004
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Um, thanks rivka. I'm back. It turns out that my passport expired four weeks ago. I had my visa and forms I-20 and I-94, and never thought to check the passport. Oops.
Fortunately the Norwegian embassy staff were very helpful. (Sometimes it's useful to be a citizen of a small nation. Personal service!) I shall fly in to Chicago tomorrow, get to the honorary consulate there, they will give me an emergency extension to my passport, and I shall fly to Glasgow on that. Arriving two hours before the funeral starts, at an airport roughly 1.5 hours away. But it may just be possible. At any rate I'll make it to the wake, even if jetlagged.
Posts: 10645 | Registered: Jul 2004
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I'm glad it's something that can be worked around. What a pain!
(Hey, you must be one of the OPTs using the new 17-month STEM extension that was part of my training this morning. Cool!)
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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Pain, indeed. The people running the bank counter at the airport got increasingly amused as I exchanged more and more dollars for quarters, calling this and that Norwegian consulate. The chief one is in New York; but the Chicago one is under the jurisdiction of the one in Minneapolis; who need authorisation from New York to authorise the Chicago one (which is only honorary) to grant me an emergency extension; they had to look up the rules for my old non-machine-readable passport... It was a mess. But we got around it in the end. All honour to the embassy staff, they were very helpful.
I'm not an OPT, I'm on an F-1 visa. I renewed that in Italy last fall, no problems. And made a careful mental note, at the time, to renew my passport when I got back to the US, which I promptly forgot about.
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OPT is a specific extension on F-1 visas. But I forgot that you're still a student (albeit a grad student).
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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KoM, I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather. I'm glad it looks like you'll be able to spend time with your family, even though it's been a hassle. Have a safe (and hopefully early-arriving) flight.
Posts: 3546 | Registered: Jul 2002
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Well, I got there in the end. With twenty minutes to spare. I was even awake, having slept a bit on the plane, though I conked out halfway through the wake. It was rather a nice eulogy; the minister had known him personally, although my grandfather was not a great church attender. Apparently the bus stop my grandfather used was right in front of the minister's house. He spoke of the seas and the roads, which was very fitting. He was a sailor - called up August, 39, demobbed September, 45 - and then worked on the roads around Dundee, building most of the modern infrastructure there.
We sang "The lord is my shepherd", "Eternal father, strong to save" and "Abide with me". All of his old bowling club was there, and the woman from the bookie's office, and any number of relatives and friends - my father met his old friend who introduced him to my mother, and I got to hear some gossip about that particular meeting which my parents had not relayed to me.
The taxi driver who took me in from Glasgow airport was a bowler, and actually knew my grandfather, though not well. Small world!
The consulate thing just barely worked - the consul actually had to go to a meeting at 1100, which was when my plane came in, but they couldn't get that message to me, so when I showed up at 1300 or so he was out, and the stamp was locked in a safe. He skipped a different meeting to come back and stamp it for me; I was extremely impressed and honoured. I shall write him a letter of thanks.
Then, when I got back to the airport, the moving forward of my ticket by one day had not shown up in the Aer Lingus computers, though it had been in the United ones. Fortunately they had seats and gave me one at no extra charge. They didn't get my kosher meal, though - the flight attendant was most distressed. I didn't tell her I only get them for the taste. She probably thinks I'm a bad Jew, now. :devil:
Posts: 10645 | Registered: Jul 2004
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I suspect my grandfather believed, at least at the level of not actively disbelieving and just going along with what he was told as a child. He just didn't attend church regularly.
As for songs, music is music, and funerals are for the living. I will make different arrangements when I am the guest of honour. For this one, I kept my disagreements with the minister's spiel internal, and listened to the eulogy instead. Christianity does have the advantage of having had 2000 years to accumulate good music for this sort of occasion. (Well, 400 years if you stick to modern English.) I listen to Communist propaganda music too, without approving the underlying message.
Posts: 10645 | Registered: Jul 2004
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