posted
This is a sort of "prologish" piece to the story.
First 13 sentances:
In the beginning and still to this very day there were and are still the seven Myla. As the supreme beings among the entire of everything: they are the ultimate. None can exceed their beautiful power. Although, as one would know, no power of such beauty can exist without its counterparts: The six Rivices. Each Rivice, formed from its parent Mylas is a void of Evil. These are the darkest forces possible of existence: vast echoes of fear, pain and hatred. But a great problem arises as the sum of these beings of great Good and Evil comes to equal thirteen… for thirteen is but an unlikely number; one of much oddity.
The sides exist unequal, for in the beginning, from the first and second Mylas a Rivice was born. Also one was from the second and third, the third and fourth, and so on, thus bringing about six Rivices of Evil, each with it's place between two Mylas. So as this unbalance of Good and Evil existed, something was created. As a mass built to weigh for Evil, Man was born from the first and seventh Myla. So man came and balanced the conflict in one way, but created a whole new controversy in another. Man was born for Evil, but was not.
This is quite recently typed so please ignore any small grammar or spelling errors. And yes, sometimes the wording is a bit strange... It's a new area for me.
[This message has been edited by AStJohn (edited January 01, 2005).]
This strikes me as backstory. Information necessary to your story, but not a story in itself. I think you recognize that when you say it is a bit 'prologish'.
Nothing wrong with backstory. It has its uses; just don't necessarily expect it to be a good way to start a story.
There really has been quite a lot of discussion about this kind of thing over the last several months. You might try doing a search on 'backstory' or 'prologue' and do some reading.
[This message has been edited by mikemunsil (edited January 01, 2005).]
posted
Thanks, I searched around a bit and checked out some of the backstory/prologue-theme-subject-topic-threads... Yeah. But anyway, I think I'll reading into this type of thing a lot more because... Well... I've always written stories with thick amounts of dialogue... almost all dialogue. But for this "story" I guess I've been aiming for a more vast and intricate historical approach. In other words, I'm kind of making a world and history upon which I can construct my stories. I hope that makes sense.
Here's a quick picture which pertains to this that anyone can check out.
quote:In other words, I'm kind of making a world and history upon which I can construct my stories.
Exctly what I have done, also. It lets me learn the craft in a place that feels comfortable to me, and that I have pride of place in. I need things like that because it is hard for me to believe in myself, and every little thing helps.
Again, there is considerable value to be gained from creating backstory/history/whathaveyou. Just don't let it sidetrack you from writing the story.
posted
Speaking of world building.. here's a neat little site I ran across a couple of years ago, and it's been pretty helpful for me. I actually went through it topic by topic and printed out the results, and I still have it. Check it out. http://www.sfwa.org/writing/worldbuilding1.htmPosts: 331 | Registered: Jan 2005
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posted
So, I get that you don't need help with spelling...but was there anything in particular that you did want?
The situation you described was pretty clear without the diagram. In point of fact, I was wondering about what went between the 1st and 7th Myla (by the way, is the name supposed to be evocative of Mylar and myelin?) before you got to the second paragraph. When you explained that they were sequential I was pretty much satisfied, then you explained that they started out sequential but man came into existence to fill the final gap and complete the round, that made sense too.
Not quite as much sense (to me, at least) by having the number of Rivices (and that is supposed to suggest "rift" and "crevice", right?) equal the number of possible combinations of two Myla, which would yield 21...but that would mess up your numberology. Right now you're missing both three and twelve, though.
On the other hand, this is a pretty dry beginning. The prose seems pretty good, but the subject matter lacks interest.
Yes, there was something that I wanted, and that was feedback, which you have given me... Thank you.
That made me laugh (Well... Not out loud) when you mentioned Mylar because I actually had thought of that after the name, Myla, was coined. I actually wrote both of the names letter by letter choosing them by there sound. Could you imagine a demonic creature snarling at you with the name "Myla"? No, it is a name made to fit by the way it sounds. Myla sounds good, not evil. Rivice on the other hand sounds almost snake like.
As for the numbers of everything... As you probably know, through out history the numbers seven and six represent two very different things. I used these numbers on purpose. Later when deliberating how man should fit among them, I realized the pattern that could be made. You have to understand that it is not the possible combinations of Myla at all.
It all fits like a puzzle. Each with their respective roles. Remember that is only thirteen lines of many more.
Thanks to everybody whose given feedback.
[This message has been edited by AStJohn (edited January 02, 2005).]
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