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or, as might call it, a caged teller. That's right! puns about banking and high finance. As I was told when I boarded a helicopter recently: "mill yon air." And this is going to be as choppy as possible. I raise a silent alarm to get us started Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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I can tell Bob's been saving up for this one.
Just checking to see how money jatraqueros use Quicken. I hope I'm not a loan in saying that this instrument is worth the investment. It helps you take stock of your finances so you aren't always walking the wire between black and red.
Posts: 5957 | Registered: Oct 2001
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Yes, Farmgirl, I noticed a change in Punwit's posting style as well. Maybe he isn't feeling 100 percent.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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I'm checking in so folks don't raise an alarm on my account. I'm a bit shamefaced that I didn't alert everyone about my withdrawl from posting for a few days.
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I wasn't sick or anything. I suppose I was feeling a bit solitary. I guess I just needed some a loan time.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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Also, Cheri has been complaining about my lack of attention to her. She needed some TLC so I had to adjust my schedule so I could fiduciary's plans better.
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So puns will be the currency of this little social exchange? Will I attempt to make a deposit? You can bank on it...
Well, just the other day I was working on getting together a mule team made up of the foals of cross-bred Shetland ponies and burros. So, as I was getting my assets in line for the big run between indian Wells and Fargo, north dakota, this guy named Igor Krosanic asks if he can hitch a ride.
I offered him the seat next to me, cracked the whip and the mule team vaulted down the road, with the Eastern European fellow safeguarding his own life by holding onto the bench.
We had quite a bit of mutual fund as we careened down the road until we hit the Wasatch mountains. There, armed robbers tried to make a hasty withdrawl of our strongbox.
To get away from these fiduciary felons, I guided the wagon off the beaten path up the old Paper Trail, which was rough and rocky, littered with boulders here and there. The wagon rattled down the trail, jumping and heaving, saving and loaning all the luck I and Igor had.
It wasn't until the wagon came roaring into the Dakotas that I noticed that old Igor had somehow fallen out of the wagon during that wild ride.
But yanno, I can honestly say, that was the first time I had ever bounced a Czech that badly...
Posts: 472 | Registered: Aug 2004
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How many of you realize that our present banking priviliges are, in part, due to a small town in the Czech Republic? Kutna Hora, a small city roughly an hour from Prague, was the home of free Czech Kings.
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A teenage, Mortimer, hated to be alone. You could get the point his interest in companionship was compounded as a Mort eyes the debitants(sp).
Posts: 25 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Thanks for the welcome Bob. I hope I don't make too much of an asset myself or show up where the negative call 'em. Let me know if I do and I will cap it all.
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Just read about a very successful talent agent. He represents Jim Carrey, Adam Sandler, Ben Stiller, Sean Connery, Roger Moore and Pierce Brosnon. Yeah he has quite a portfolio of Shticks and Bonds.
Posts: 25 | Registered: Sep 2004
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Wow, Rep, you really Excel at punning! Let's have a picnic to welcome Reparty! We could spread a sheet and have some fun. Bob, if you get me everyone's numbers, I will column.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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I'm not sure but I believe that the witty reparty might be a good friend of mine. Whether or not this is true I extend a sincere welcome.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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If reparty is my old chum I'd like to credit our hours of witty repartee for my joy in punning.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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Whatever became of Linda Blair. I always wondered if she wouldn't end up as an accountant. She consumed several priests didn't she? She had a grasp of de priest, she ate some.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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(took me awhile on that last one, punwit) Had to say it outloud several times because the comma really threw me) LOL -- FG
Posts: 9538 | Registered: Aug 2003
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Elizabeth, thanks for your summation and offer for a fun ancillary function. Punwit has netted my present value since my joining coincided with a recent transaction of our own. I paid him on an estimation and now he thinks he are owe I.
Posts: 25 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I knew a guy in Greece that worked in pest control. He would fill in the gaps of homes to keep out very small ants. Alas, he was arrested for stealing local fruit. When the seriousness of his offense was explained he agreed to quit. Yes, he was a terrible date raider but a reasonable, fine ant seal planter.
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Did he steal it from the fruitgal? She was always so cheap. Why would he due that? Now, he will have to pay the price.
Posts: 10890 | Registered: May 2003
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I was there during a yacht outing. The theft of fruit there was awful though. It made for a bare market and made my sailing short.
Posts: 25 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I don't see what all the fuss is about with melting icecaps - isn't increasing liquid assets a good thing?
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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I needed an adhesive to repair the Bristol stand upon which my nest egg rested. I found some folks who use Linux. I am not sure how secure it is but the gunk bonds the blue chips.
(I don't know if editing is encouraged but this has some interesting twists for those who care to look more carefully, punwit)
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In my youth I once ridiculed an old gypsy crone. Somehow she found my place of residence and sent me a note cursing me. She promised that one day I would be as old and grey and bent as she. That was my very first promise hoary note.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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Hmm...after reviewing this thread, I fear this topic was not as rich as I'd hoped. I simply cannot endorse any more posting.
Posts: 22497 | Registered: Sep 2000
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Has anyone else heard the tale of the German immigrant that was set on opening his very own bank in America? His thick accent normally didn't cause much trouble but he had a heck of a time borrowing money to finance the construction of the safe. Everytime he broached the subject of "de fault loan" financiers just shook their heads and walked away.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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I've thought of another young actor that could perhaps find alternative employment in the banking world. I understand that McCauley Kulkin has been through a rough couple of years. If he ever needs to he could work at a bank helping folks finance there dreams. After all he has lots of experience in Home A Loans.
Posts: 2022 | Registered: Mar 2004
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Coroners have special cooling agents. When they need to keep a body cold over a long period of time, they grab a mort ice.
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
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I am sure you heard the story of Dorothy, the girl from Kansas with a penchant for diamonds. When she went shopping in the land of ice and found her toto she went screaming, "ATM, ATM".
I scare' crow that she had selected more diamonds than ten men could carry. I am no how hardly lie'n.
(sorry if that is too much Frank Baum and not enough bank foam)
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