posted
Just general suggestions. Not pointed at anyone in particular, although the recent kerfluffles did bring it to mind.
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1. Don't lie about your age. You don't have to mention it, but don't lie about it.
*That would be interacting with others in a deliberately inauthentic way. It makes people feel as if you are/were mocking them, and in many cases, it is transparently false, anyway. Which make the "mocking others and getting away with it" trip even more annoying and irritating.
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2. Don't make up a new alias and pretend to be someone else, especially if you continue to post under both (or all) aliases. If you want to start over fresh, that's fine, but it's rude and game-playing to pretend to be different people at the same time in this circumstance.
*Same as above.
*And yes, it is transparent. Everyone will know, and everyone finds it irritating. Just be one person -- yourself -- and be yourself as honestly and authentically as possible. That's more than enough.
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3. Don't try to pick fights just to get noticed. The attention you get for it is brief and unpleasant compared to the longer-lasting and much richer profits that come from being authentically passionate and respectful.
*Same as above, again.
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Other suggstions? Additions, corrections?
Posts: 14017 | Registered: May 2000
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posted
Don't try to bait OSC with rude questions under a new name... As it is not polite... Instead, be polite and respectful about your disagreements and do not name call anyone... And don't start off with those big topics that everyone loves to argue passionately about. Instead start off with something light and witty. Such as a cookie recipe. We all love a good cookie recipe with lots of chocolate.
Posts: 9942 | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
Install the google toolbar to spell check what you wrote before you hit "Add Reply". Because spelling errors are noticed, and make you seem less intelligent and articulate than you could be.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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Though I sometimes forget to spell. Also my grammar is horrible even though I am an English major. So I am forgiving of other people's mistakes. Unless they are in books.
Posts: 9942 | Registered: Mar 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Synesthesia: Though I sometimes forget to spell.
That must make writing difficult.
Usually I can tell if I misspelled something. It's frustrating to type super-fast and make a lot of mistakes though.
Posts: 9942 | Registered: Mar 2003
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If you keep on being so negative about my posts, my solution will be to send you to a little place the French like to call L'Hopital.Posts: 13680 | Registered: Mar 2002
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I might have been forgiving, but you just destroyed the remainder of my good will. I'm on the verge of subtracting you from the list of people I like, unless we take this conversation off on a tangent pretty quickly.
Posts: 4077 | Registered: Jun 2003
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You guys are just punning yourselves in circles. Why don't you both sit down over a pie and talk it over, with out puns Posts: 3295 | Registered: Jun 2004
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I'm divided. I don't like to give in, but I think the sum of this conversation will not be positive. I could ennumerate the ways in which Icky initiated this exchange, but I don't think that would be productive.
I think maybe Alcon's right; let's all have pi and forget about it.
(Also, I don't think I'm equal to creating anymore math puns.)
Posts: 4077 | Registered: Jun 2003
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posted
4. Try to respect other people, especially when they are trying to accomplish something useful. Silliness and games are fine here, but it can be very disrespectful and self-centered when you take over a serious thread with them.
5. Don't rely on a gimmick. You may have something that you think is going to make you seem super special and garner you everyone's attention, but it really won't. At best, you'll be a nine days wonder. Usually, people aren't going to care that much and are going to find it tiresome when you keep repeating the same thing.
You are much more interesting and special than whatever one-dimensional gimmick you can come up with. There's your angle. Relying on a gimmick is only going to detract from that.
6. There are other forums that might suit you better. The Philotic Web is an OSC fan site that has a very different tenor. The participants there tend to be on the younger side and if yourself not fitting in here so well, especially if you are a teenager, you may find p-web more your speed.
On another tack, Ornery presents another very different somewhat OSC-centered forum experience. I'm not exactly a big fan, so check it out for yourself and see it it's your style.
7. If you feel you've done something majorly wrong or have dug yourself into a pit here, the way out may be easier than you would think. Hatrack is a very forgiving community. In most cases, acknowledging that you did something wrong, appologizing, and promising to do better (and trying to fulfill that promise) is all you need to do to turn things around.
Conversely, if you go the other route and try to conceal or get offended when people chide you for your lapses, you're not going to get anywhere near as much leeway.
Posts: 10177 | Registered: Apr 2001
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posted
Addendum to #7. The apology really has to be authentic. Most people here can tell the difference between a fake "I got caught" apology and a real one.
Posts: 10177 | Registered: Apr 2001
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quote:Originally posted by Synesthesia: Usually I can tell if I misspelled something. It's frustrating to type super-fast and make a lot of mistakes though.
Psst . . . it was a joke. Even if you're misspelling, you're still spelling.
Posts: 9945 | Registered: Sep 2002
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posted
You have no souls. When one broods over guilt and suffers, that shows them to be human. And yet even after they make such a display of their heartfelt sorrow for their actions, you would still continue to prefer them a fraud.
You have no souls. Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2006
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I am saying that maybe people like Advent can feel great pain over what they did, and yet you continue to prefer that they have remained in such lies rather than try to reintigrate them back as one of you. You seem to prefer to keep them at bay while also biting and snapping at them like the rabid dogs you have become in such moments. You revert to being valrese, when instead you should try to human beings and understand that no one is perfect. That we all make mistakes and that maybe those people you continue to hold at bay may be suffering a wound that grows deeper every day because you will not take them back into your hearts as one of your own.
That is why I say you have no souls, that is why I say you are valrese and not romen
Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
That explains why you are not understanding what we are saying.
If you are varelse (if we are, then you are). There's no communication going on.
However, I doubt that either is varelse. Rather, I think you're young and feel that giving up the games you are playing would leave you without a way to get attention.
However, if you post thoughtfully and sincerely and stop playing games, the attention you will get will be much more of what you actually want.
Posts: 26077 | Registered: Mar 2000
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posted
Advent, I know it feels to you like everyone is picking on you unfairly. Here's the thing. At least some of us here are genuinely trying to help you, not just on this forum, but in life in general.
The story you're telling yourself isn't true. You're not the poor, misunderstood hero that is so complex but who no one is giving a chance. We're not the souless villians who delight in your pain.
We're trying to help you grow up. It's a hard and a scary thing to do, but ultimately incredibly valuable. Read it that way and maybe you'll feel different about things.
Or not. One thing you're going to want to remember, though, is that most people here aren't really stupid and that you are nowhere near as clever as you suppose.
Posts: 10177 | Registered: Apr 2001
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posted
Ha! I see myself as no hero, I see myself as some one who is not unfairly tormented. But I do see that even with this creation (gestures to Helion), even with my Phoenix. Whom I created so that I could return to this place without sin, without my sins placed upon his head I can never escape my crimes. I do not see myself as misunderstood I just wanted for others to understand what I percieved as the motives behind my crimes. I make no excusses, because I know they are worthless.
So if you wish to burn this Phoenix that I attepmted to create to rise from the ashes of my sin. Then do so. It is your choice.
Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2006
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9. When people complain about something you do and get angry with you, do NOT feel the need to leave the forum. Instead, listen to them.
Posts: 8120 | Registered: Jul 2000
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posted
Advent, I think you should know that you're making a far bigger deal out of this than anyone else is.
Posts: 9945 | Registered: Sep 2002
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quote:Originally posted by Tresopax: 9. When people complain about something you do and get angry with you, do NOT feel the need to leave the forum. Instead, listen to them.
To which I reply "Why would a caged wolf hold still? So that the hunters might have cleaner kill? I would prefer to be on the move, rather than give any one hunter a clearer shot at my heart."
Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
He's playing a game now. I'm out. He needs a time out without the attention and sense of importance he's craving.
Posts: 10177 | Registered: Apr 2001
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Advent, I much prefer you to come back and face your sins than try to escape them. But I understand that that is *very* hard to do.
quote:"Why would a caged wolf hold still? So that the hunters might have cleaner kill? I would prefer to be on the move, rather than give any one hunter a clearer shot at my heart."
I'm sorry that life has taught you to be on the defensive all the time. That happens when you've been hurt a lot. But open your eyes, we are *not* hunters. You need to regain your faith in humanity and goodness in other people.
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Whom I created so that I could return to this place without sin, without my sins placed upon his head I can never escape my crimes.
See, without your "sins", it really isn't you. Without all that has gone before, you are again presenting us with a fiction. As for me, that's fine. However, most of us can tell -- if not right away, then certainly over time -- when the being we are experiencing is genuine or not. It's all a question of how much a part of the community you want to be.
I, personally, would rather be hated for what I am than loved for what I am not. Posts: 6394 | Registered: Dec 1999
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posted
*sigh* It has been too long since I have seen anything to suggest that I should not remain on the defensive at all times. Perhaps I have learned the wrong lessons from my past. But to me it seems that there are always other motives behind any act of kindness. When others reach out a helping hand, I am more wary of them than of others who hold a clenched fist waiting to strike me down. At least with those people I know from the first meeting where they stand.
Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2006
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Then perhaps we have not learned the same lessons Karl. From what I see no one is ever loved for what they truly are in there heart of hearts. They are loved for how others percieve them to be. Not for what they really are to themselves.
Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2006
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quote:But to me it seems that there are always other motives behind any act of kindness.
Perhaps it has been your fate to come across a lot of "rotten apples," especially ones close to you. But there *are* good people out there. And Hatrack is full of them.
Give people in general a chance to pleasantly surprise you. I can understand being wary and taking precautions to not be hurt by others, but it is sad to lose all your trust in humanity.
quote:They are loved for how others percieve them to be. Not for what they really are to themselves.
That would explain your hesitancy to "just be yourself".
Maybe I am an unsinkable optomist, but I just can't let myself believe that.
Posts: 7050 | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
At it's conception it was a nice thread for newbies, then it became a pun thread, and now not so happy.
Posts: 5362 | Registered: Apr 2004
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Nothing I ever say will be believed. But I shall try anyways.
"I am sorry to all that believed I was someone who I am not, I am sorry for my lies and my decptions. I am sorry."Posts: 18 | Registered: Mar 2006
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