_____________________________

On the eighth anniversary of Alice’s death, the single guys in the shop started a personal ad pool. They’d decided I should get back out there, even if they acted like it was really for them. Everybody tossed their name in the hat and off we went. How I won that week I’ll never know. Aquaman_68 and Hobby Horse had already struck out, so it was probably just my turn. When my name got drawn, the boys started cat-calling up to me where I sat on my shelf.
“You da puppet, Tiller!”
“Go, stick-boy!”
In a high falsetto, Jack-in-the-Box moaned, “Oh, Pinocchio. Lie to me, baby, lie to me!”
I took it in stride. Here’s what I put in the ad.

Nits:

"...I'll never know." "I took it in stride." - cliche.

They tossed their name in the hat and off they went? Went where? How did he win? What did he do to win? Two of them struck out? Eh?

I could go on, but I think you get my drift I have a feeling I'm in the minority in not knowing what's going on but I thought I'd let you know how lost I felt on reading this.