quote:

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Her mouth was like dust. (Awesome first line)
They came to a moonfruit tree, squat and haunting. “You must be thirsty, my Lady.” Tharsen said, waiting for Leah Keros to catch up. Little Charid hovered by his side. Tharsen reached up and(Cut "reached up and." The reaching is assumed if he picks one.) picked a ripe, red, crescent shaped fruit from a lower branch.(unless you tell me he's freakishly tall, I'll assume it's a lower branch) Slipping a little (If it's in his pocket, I'll assume it's little.)folding knife from his tunic pocket, he sliced through the waxy skin and handed her a goodly portion.
“Ds’seth, Mas l’Ahlehn,” she said. Thank you, in the name of God. The sticky juices trickled down her fingers. She put a piece to her mouth,(Cut this whole phrase. If she's sucking its sweetness, I'll assume she put it to her mouth.) and sucked its sweetness between her teeth and onto her tongue.(I could argue that "between her teeth and onto her tongue" is implicit in the sucking, but I like how you phrased this.) She nibbled away all but the skin and the bitter seeds.

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You're repeating yourself. Also, I don't need to know every movement of your character's hands.