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Author Topic: Life experiences that make you write better
Lyrajean
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Just recieved feedback on bits of 2 stories that are WIP. The amateur critic who knows I live and work in Japan responded that they think my overseas experience has improved my writing.

Nice news to hear, but as we hammered out the what and why it was clear that what had changed was my ability to describe an alien milieu in minute but relevant detail, and protraying an ordinary person surrounded by strange people in a strange environment who could be alien leaving him feeling like the odd man out, stranger in a strange land, essentially the experience I have almost everyday in my real life. Since I write SF this is immensely useful.

So, question is have you had any life experiences that have inadvertently made you a better writer? And I'm not talking about the deliberate ones like writers' conferences, participating in this forum, critiquing, etc...


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extrinsic
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The ancient maxim, Know about what you write, applies to creative writing in subtle ways. I've found that the more profound emotional experiences I've had inform my writing. They help me to appreciate the emotional context of my stories and the stories that I read.

It's interesting to note that journalism encourages writing about what one knows; however, I've noted that's not true as often as might seem logical. A veteran news correspondent covering a hurricane won't have as much raw emotional response as a first-timer. Considering the purpose of journalism is to inform the public of topics in the public interest, an emotional correspondent is likely to convey the danger of a hurricane more effectively than a 30-year veteran.

I've been around, more places and vocations than might be best for my mental and financial state. Anymore, even the familiar is strange. I'm a raging crowd agoraphobe. I'm always strongly feeling a place or situation. Doing so allows me to accommodate my anxiety toward strangers, either with real or imagined barriers. For me, it's more the people who create an emotional response than the place, but the places inform the behavior of the people and vice versa. They're so interconnected as to be indistinguishably linked.

Standing on a nearby sandy promonotory projecting into the sea, like it's the end of the world, with waves crashing on shore in a force four gale is a place and situation in which I love to be.


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tempest
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its fortunate that you are using your experiences to better your writing.

ive had a few big experiences that could effect my writing (living in a foreign country, moving across the country as a young teenager, the sudden loss of a loved one, etc.), but at the time i didnt really pay attention in terms of being able to apply it to writing and expression. now i have to go back, dig them up try to reexperience it to some degree. im learning to 'experience' my life (something some people do naturally) to taste it, smell it, and not just react to it, or numbly bob along in life's river.

i am beginning to realize that even small events and memories can profoundly effect my perception and ability to express myself in writing. i remember when i was young, our campfire group went to a geriatric facility to talk with some of the patients and spend time with them. it was a very anxiety producing experience for me. i can still remember the smells, the sounds, and the apprehension (ok downright fear) i felt. i am exploring these feelings and memories to apply them in a story im working on.

im a bit of a slow learner in this way. ive always been behind in life, but better late than never. and sometimes better late than prematurely.

[This message has been edited by tempest (edited October 18, 2008).]


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C L Lynn
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The big experiences, yes, the emotional highs and lows, yes, all certainly helpful, but what about the common every day experience of dialog? Why is it that so many writers seem to have trouble writing believable dialog? Everybody talks with somebody, every day. When I made up my mind to write fiction, I decided I didn't know how people spoke to one another, that I had to *learn* how people exchanged dialog. That sounds kinda stupid, but I guess I took *speech* for granted. So around the supper table, especially on Sunday afternoons when family discussions could carry on for hours, I started *listening* to speech patterns: how does a conversation evolve, change into something else, how do people interrupt one another, or two conversations overlap to create a pleasant sort of chaos; how does one person's vocabulary differ from another's, how do they string expressions together, hesitate, stutter, etc. I made a mental note and tried to replicate those patterns in my writing. It seems to have paid off, b/c readers have commented on the natural flow of the dialog in my stories. So, I guess this conscious decision and continual practice has helped my writing as much as any family tragedy or move across country, and I've had my share of that, too. Who hasn't, right? Also, it makes me the quietest person at the party. I *love* to sit back and listen to people talk. Everything is research.
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TaleSpinner
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I use lots of life experiences in my writing. Overseas travel is especially rewarding because, as Lyrajean says, it opens the mind to fresh ways of doing things, and feelings of alienation.

But "inadvertently"? Hmm ...

Right now I'm looking after my son's pet tarantula while he's away at college. This was a big surprise because I'm arachnophobic; but the thing is hynotically fascinating--as long as it's in its tank. I've had to research how to feed it, and in the process found out how they live. In consequence I'm planning a fantasy which features spiders ... and I haven't even started thinking about the pet boa constrictor he's also left with me ...

A while ago I entered a flash fiction contest imagining I'd write my usual kind of futuristic SF. Instead I found the trigger taking me to an unexpected fantasy set in the stone age and featuring Pagans--about which and whom I know almost nothing and have since enjoyed researching.

For me another great source of ideas is industrial history, which helps with the steam punk I'm exploring.

Cheers,
Pat


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extrinsic
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A felllow used to bring a tarantula to the bar I frequented. Equally frightening and fascinating to other patrons, the tarantula became a regular fixture on the bar counter. The owner and his companion left early most nights, except one. After last call and all the glasses were being rounded up, out came the cleaning supplies. The faintest whiff of ammonia, and the tarantula upended and died.
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Crystal Stevens
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It's been said many times to "write what you know", which is why I chose a story involving horses for one of my writing projects. It was amazing how easy the story flowed as I typed it out on my computer. The reason was because I have experienced most of what takes place in the story or have enough knowledge on the subject to make it come more to life and be that much more believable and realistic.

So, yes, I think it does help if a person writes from life experiences or personal experiences. JMHO


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arriki
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Write what you know. Well. I have lived overseas in non-western countries and that helps. However, the "what I know" is not that but these foreign places that exist (I hope) only in my own mind. The Mars of the "Mars Born" after a terrible war with Earth-Luna, and the distant future of the Lysiscans where humanity is being warped to suit alien tastes are both places I "know" far better than any place you can currently buy a ticket to. I have walked on the cold, northern shores of village while a demon is being walled up inside a castle's walls. I've been ice fishing at a hole not in some Michigan lake but on Europa as surely as I've been sailing on the Gulf of Mexico.

So I don't believe you have to have seen it with your own physical eyes to know a place.


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Brad R Torgersen
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To a certain extent, writers are allowed (indeed, encouraged) to just "make it up" as we go.

However, I think there are certain experiences that are essential if one writes in a very particular niche.

John Grisham certainly could not write so well about the lawyer world without, himself, being a lawyer.

Many military fiction writers have prior service records, and this certainly aids with authenticity; especially among readers who are also military.

Etc, etc.

I think the best rule of thumb is, all new experiences become fodder for improved story. Unless writing a totally abstract fantasy, no writer does themselves a favor just sitting around the house all year, never going out or doing things beyond their comfort zone.

JMHO.


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Robert Nowall
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I'm of two minds on the "write what you know" philosophy. On the one hand, I feel the impact of a work written about something, written by someone who has an intimate knowledge of this something.

But on the other hand, there's a certain "escape" component in writing---and I, for one thing, don't want to write about the dull things I actually do and have done and have intimate knowledge of.

There's also a certain implication in this philosophy, that writers should seek out new experiences and trades, for the sake of their writing---and that's something else I don't particularly want to do.

*****

Ah, well. I do know some of the works I like, and feel authentic, were written by people without a lot of this worldly experience---done one research and what life experience they had---so I think I can still get by without it.


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Kathleen Dalton Woodbury
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As arriki has pointed out, you can imagine enough to "know" something that you haven't actually experienced in your own life. You can also extrapolate from a known experience into one that you haven't experienced: hunger to starvation, for example (with some research to be sure you are getting the details right).

For whatever it may be worth, here's an example of how NOT to imagine a scene from a recent experience of mine:

I attended a play festival last night (a series of one-act plays performed in the same evening), and in one of the plays a character came in from the rain and apologized for his dripping umbrella. One of the other characters had just spilled fruit punch on her dress, and a third character was scrambling to wet a paper towel to help wipe up the fruit punch. The problem was that they didn't have any water. My reaction was "HUH!? Of course you do, dripping from the umbrella." To me, this is an example of NOT writing what you know, and it was a very simple kind of knowing that would have taken a very little bit of imagination. (But maybe I'm the only one who would have thought of using the dripping rain water.)

The play had another problem in that, so far as I could tell, neither the rain, the dripping umbrella, the spilled fruit punch, or the "lack" of water to help clean up the spill had anything at all to do with the "plot" of the play. (Chekhov would have been spinning in his grave.)

I urge you to use what you know as well as what you imagine, but use it because the story requires it not just because you can't think of anything else. Okay?


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aspirit
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KDW, perhaps the dripping umbrella moment emphasized unity between the characters, as all three were courteous yet unimaginative?

As for Lyrajean's question: Yes. I learned in childhood to see the grays in life, and I believe stories moving through the nebulous grays are more interesting than those simply contrasting black and white. Learning of love through the man who is now my husband and, to a lesser extent, through the vain attempts of my biological family or friends, enable me to build stronger or more interesting bonds between my characters. I think all my other life experiences, from hiding in a cramped enclosure for hours to traveling as a People to People Student Ambassador, also brew in my subconscious as a richer base for my writing.


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Crystal Stevens
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I guess I should explain further on the "write-what-you-know" theory.

I didn't mean to stay in the real world or not use your imagination to create places you've never been, but to use this as a launching pad to create stories and imaginary places. I have another universe that I made up where several of my stories take place, but I have drawn on my encounters and experiences with other people in my life to breath life into my stories and the characters that live there.

So you don't have to write what you know in the literal sense but use it as a tool to help bring your stories more to life because it's something you're more familiar with and more comfortable with when it comes to your writing.


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Kathleen Dalton Woodbury
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The thing is that I can recall three stories about aspiring writers in which they are encouraged to "write what you know" and not waste time on that "romantic adventure stuff." Of course, they're all fiction, but I feel that we keep getting that message.

The first one is in LITTLE WOMEN by Louisa Alcott (who wrote imaginative adventure stories, but is known for her more "what you know" kinds of stories) where Jo March wants to write adventures, but is convinced to write something more home-like, and her book about her sister Beth is the one in which she succeeds.

The second one is in L.M. Montgomery's stories about Anne Shirley who also loved romantic adventure, but was encouraged over and over again to write about the "just folks" she knew.

The third one was in THE WALTONS (tv show) where John-Boy wanted to write about big, adventurous things, but only actually found success as a writer when he wrote about the "just folks" he grew up knowing.

And I bet you all can think of other stories like that. It isn't just "write what you know." The encouragement/pressure is to not write things you have to "make up" and instead just write about "folks."

I think "just folks" stories are okay, but they aren't the only kinds of stories out there. And if all you write about is so closely based on your own life that you are actually being seriously autobiographical, you are going to run out of material fast. I submit that that may be one reason why authors like Emily Bronte and Harper Lee never were able to write any other books.

Hmm.

Well.

Getting down from my soap box now.


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satate
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I completely agree. I still remember being in my highschool English and hearing the teacher say you should write what you know. So of course I was crushed because I didn't want to write what I knew I wanted to write what I liked to read, fantasy adventure. So now when I hear teachers (like my mom) say write what you know I saw no, write what you like. (on a side note I am not commenting on curriculum or teaching students to write in which it may be helpful to have them write things they know from time to time)

To keep inline with this thread. I find my life experiences always enhance my writing since they are the things from which I draw on. I find it all helpful from monotenus tasks to challenges that leave me crying to experiences that have me shaking in fear.


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Robert Nowall
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Sidebar thought: I've got a copy of (but haven't yet tried to read) The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao, by Junot Diaz. I gather it's about, at least in part, about a guy who wants to be "the Dominican J. R. R. Tolkien." It just won the Pulitzer Prize.

I'm reminded of The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, detaling the lives of two guys who wanted to create SF superhero comics, which won the Pulitzer a few years ago. (Again, I've got a copy but haven't yet gotten around to reading it.)

Why are novels about guys who want to write fantasy or SF worthy of Pulitzer Prizes---yet fantasies or SF novels are not?


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extrinsic
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Pulitzer winners have appreciably more literary elements than the average amount of theme, characterization, conflict, setting, protagonist, antagonist, point of view and such in other stories. Beginning with an old favorite of the literary world, stories about guys wanting to write science fiction and fantasy, they're metafiction, fiction about writing fiction, which might also revolve about a False Document literary element.
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Kathleen Dalton Woodbury
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quote:
Why are novels about guys who want to write fantasy or SF worthy of Pulitzer Prizes---yet fantasies or SF novels are not?

Because writing about writers wanting to write is the ultimate "write what you know" for writers?


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philocinemas
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Have you read The Road. It might not be classic sci-fi, but it is definitely speculative (and very profound).
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