posted
So I'm progressing nicely along in my current WIP, and I've noticed I do something: I have my scenes all outlined ahead of time. (First the main characters meet, then they have to do this, then this, then this happens, etc...)
I've noticed that between these outlined scenes, there is time that needs to take place. For various reasons, I don't feel comfortable just skipping ahead ("and they arrived in the city one month later...") But the parts between are kind of... boring. They aren't the action/drama/plot intense scenes that make the framework of my outline. In each case, its about a chapter from point A to point B, and my characters usually end up discussing stuff or reminding each other of the plot.
posted
I just realized some context may help. I have two main characters who meet a third character: a woman who doesn't speak a lick of English. They start teaching her, but they have to travel to another city (which I make at least a month away so there can be time enough for some preliminary learning of English by this woman. Otherwise, she's a real flat character...)
But I don't know how to make learning a new language interesting to read in a way that is pertinent to the plot.
posted
You probably only need a few scattered scenes to show the passage of time. There are probably some other things that you can include during this period, for character development. How the characters feel about each other and the different ways they react to the same things. Some of the little quirks that give the characters life.
How about a slightly humorous scene where the woman tries to explain something in English, but ends up saying something other than what she means. Or maybe she urgently tries to tell them something but it comes out all wrong.
posted
If possible, you could compress the timescale of the story. Does a month really need to pass? If not, just make the next scene the next day or whatever. Similar to the way a story distills conflict and action, it's often effective to distill things up with respect to time.
If the month needs to be there, and no significant story points occur within it, likely the kindest thing you can do for your readers is to skip it and pick up the story a month later. If this occurs at the very beginning of the story, you could consider starting the story after the month, whith the characters already acquainted.
Or you can change your story around so that the plot or a subplot keep moving during that time.
posted
I agree with dee. If the month that passes holds no significance, then the best thing you can have is a segue. Ex: "Over the next month, Jonie struggled through her "Hello, how are you's" and "Where is the toilet's,"..."
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posted
I feel that the "boring parts" need to be there in a story to some degree - it is a matter of pacing. I know books aren't movies and vice-versa; however, the best movies, IMO, have a heartbeat to them. The same with books. It is important to have down-time to prepare the reader for what comes next. This could be filled with comic relief or character building techniques. Whichever way a writer goes, there definitely should be something there to keep the reader from being bored.
I remember watching Raiders of the Lost Arc at the movies when I was a kid and remembering how different it was in that it went by like "BANG, BANG, BANG!" But it really didn't there were still the tedious lecture scenes, the little lovey-dovey scenes, and the monkey scenes. These scenes were there to give the viewer that little break so to catch up. As writers I feel it is important to do the same.
It is as easy as PIE: Preparation Information Experience
(BTW: KDW, this is my acronym - terribly unoriginal - but unneeding of reference)
posted
To me, every scene should accomplish something. In the case of your time passage I agree with some of the earlier postings in that you can use the filler scenes for humor and character development.
And if it's an adventure, why can't they encounter a little danger? Or why not an evening around the fire with another traveler telling stories? What else can intrude on their simple, safe journey to make things more interesting?
I agree with Meredith that you probably only need a few scattered scenes to cover the passage of time.
Use this time to give your reader a really good look at the characters and it won't be boring.
posted
I have a certain revulsion for skipping-ahead-to-writing-the-good-parts...I try to avoid it wherever possible...of course, I've also had things die on me before I get to the good parts...
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posted
Great stuff can happen in the in-between places. Your characters could practice sword fighting. Or get a job. Or fall in love. Or gather herbs that change as the seasons change. It doesn't need to be more than a page here and there, but it will build depth of your characters, give them more to lose and make the in between parts lots of fun. I like to get every thought I've ever had in my head down on paper and then distill it down to the best parts.
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posted
Good responses, thank you all... This has given me much to ponder. I admit I write trying to keep in mind the method of Ayn Rand:
"every scene, sequence and passage of a good novel has to involve, contribute to and advance all three of its major attributes: theme, plot, characterization"
I've tried to implement this to keep depth to my writing. It helps me keep focus. As a writer, I don't want to ask someone to read something I wrote that I myself would not be interested in reading. I think that in my "boring parts," I was losing track of the fact that since not much was happening to plot, there isn't much to talk about. (My current WIP is mostly plot driven, I am hoping to flesh out the characterization thoroughly) But focusing on characterization on this bit may help.
One of the problems is that I painted myself into a corner. This mysterious woman doesn't speak their language, so its hard to show character as interactions are limited. But you all have given me some good ideas to work with. I think I'll investigate those a bit.
posted
The lack of a common language is not a barrier, it is an opportunity. My boyfriend and I went to China for six weeks with a nearly useless phrasebook and some of our best stories have to do with conversations where no language is shared.
I've traveled a fair amount and there are almost always other ways to get things across besides spoken language. Transactions are particularly easy. But even complex ideas can be gotten across if you're creative enough. Of course there will be mistakes along the way and that can easily lead to humor.
Lack of a common language does not stop communication, it just changes it.
posted
Teraen, have you ever seen the movie The 13th Warrior? It did something very interesting with language - it was filmed from the perspective of someone learning a new language, where the MC slowly began to understand (in English) bits and pieces of what was being said by others. I have seen this done in a limited way in books (can't remember titles) where jibberish slowly becomes recognizable. It is an interesting effect, but it should always be used in a very limited way so not to turn off readers. - Just a thought. Posts: 2003 | Registered: Jul 2008
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posted
Yup, I've seen 13th warrior. One of the inspirations, actually, for this scene. I've always wondered why fantasy books don't take into account more language difficulties... My problem with the language in mine is two-fold.
First, as a limited speaker, this woman can't participate as fully in the conversations and therefore the story (For example, nobody knows who she is or where she came from at this point). She likewise doesn't know who these people are that are taking her along with them.
Secondly, because learning a new language takes time, it has some length requirements to learn to speak. There are also some interesting interactions that can take place with miscommunication, and I already have a few of these that end up being central as this woman learns more, but for now it consists of nothing more than pointing at things and learning their names.
[This message has been edited by Teraen (edited October 23, 2009).]
quote:(For example, nobody knows who she is or where she came from at this point). She likewise doesn't know who these people are that are taking her along with them.
It seems to me that this information would be crucial in developing the story. Or is finding out who she is the thrust of this part of the story? I would also be curious as to why she is going off with strangers when she doesn't know who they are or why she is being taken.
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posted
See? You got my point. This information IS crucial to how the story unfolds. Some scenes I have for example are (in no particular order): when she finally learns enough to tell her story and everyone (including the reader) sees the pieces fall into place, when she tries to tell them someone is dangerous but she can't due to language limitations, when she misunderstands and think the MC says he doesn't love her, etc..
But until these scenes unfold, it can be boring. My wife speaks a different language, and when we first dated it is incredible how much we didn't understand. My challenge is making the progression interesting.
posted
It makes a difference if they are actually trying to teach the language, or are learning it by observation.
he holds an eating utensil up "Fork" He points to the breast of burden. "Horse" Eating container "Bowl" cooking container "Pot." She will learn the language faster that way then just listening and slowly picking things up. Also, if she taught them some of her words as they go, they might learn to speak to each other faster. I have seen that in some movies where exchanging of words for things and actions, they communicate faster.
A couple scenes showing how they are learning to speak, One at the beginning, one where they are making mistakes, and one where they are talking fairly clearly, would be all that is needed. One might also show a change of seasons to show the time. You might even have them spend time some place, like where the hunting is good or the fishing is good, resting, tending an injured animal, so there is a reason for them to take time, traveling a month to get to some place that is only a few days away.
posted
Stegman, that's what I am currently doing. She learns by observation and direct instruction, but I still think its boring. I need some nutmeg or something to spice it up.
posted
To make the progression interesting (and I assume it's the same material you referred to as the "boring" parts before) the advice attributed to Ayn Rand above is perfect. The optimum is to do all three things in all the material. Good dramatic tension is the precipitator. Make sure all the participants have a goal that means a lot to them and something that truly opposes attainment of that goal and causes them to keep acting/working/struggling near their maximum capacity to overcome it.
You could make the story about the character learning a new language, or make learning the new language an action the character is taking for a larger goal, or both, which is what you seem to be describing. Learning a second language is a challenge, but it is also something that is not notably rare or unique. To make it compelling in a story setting you could add or beef up an obstacle so that the outcome is in doubt, either of being able to learn to adequately employ the language at all, or learning it fast enough to be of use.
posted
A clarification...by "good parts" I mean stuff where I know what happens, what the characters will do and say, and how it will advance or resolve the plot. What I mean by "stuff in between" or "boring parts" is stuff where I don't know any of that, or some dry stretch where nothing much happens, plotwise or characterwise, or a stretch where I haven't figured anything out and am writing through sheer inertia to break through to the good parts.
*****
If you're pointing to things, you better have the right word for what's in front of you. If you're teaching the word "fork," you better not be holding a spoon or knife or spork. If you're indicating a breast of burden, it'd better not be a mule when you say "horse." (Or "woman," for that matter.)
There's the old story, probably an urban legend, of how "kangaroo" actually means "what the hell are you saying?" in some native Australian aborigine dialect...
posted
Actually, the first scene where they try to teach her sort of works like that, with her learning the wrong words for things. I think it works out ok. I just don't feel I can fill ALL the necessary parts with such things. I do like some of these advices I have recieved. I'm going to think on some of them...
Keep them coming! My future readers will thank you for it!
posted
If it's not entertaining then you must skip it. There MUST be conflict in the journey, preferably within your trio of characters. Make it dramatic, funny, dangerous, or whatever. But definitely make it entertaining.
The successful "down" scene to which philocinemas referred were all done like this. If the words is just boring then I don't want to pay for them.
posted
One thing you might do to add to the tension and the interest, as she learns more language, is have her keep trying new ways to tell them things (such as that someone is dangerous).
The motivation to communicate should make her try over and over again to get her message across, even if she doesn't succeed until the end.
And she should try different things and get different results, since supposedly only the insane try the same thing over and over again in spite of getting the same results.
posted
Doc, don't get me wrong. I agree with you. If they are boring, they must go. I am trying to find ways to make it less boring. Due to the feedback here, I think I have a few I'll try out.
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posted
Study Stephen King's The Stand or Robert McCammon's Swan Song.
Also consider this. When you are getting them from point A to point B, and you are doing some character building during that time, what is the worst thing that could happen?
Let me give an idea. In my fantasy novel, End of All, I was getting my two elves from point A to point B. They had to go through a swamp before they came to the tar of anger.
At first, it was just going to be them talking while they traveled through the swamp. Character building, basically. That would have turned out to be a short scene. Then I thought, what is the worst thing that could happen? But before that, I thought, what is something crazy that can happen?
So, Skyla is a little on edge from being turded on by the black Turds, birds that eat all day, then find people to crap on. They live for it. Anyway, she had been crapped on, and will now stink for three days or so.
A pink swamp monkey pops out of no where, and she freaks out and zaps it with her lightning powers. Oops, killed it. A bunch pink swamp monkeys with blue tails show up to examin their dead friend. Anyway, it turned out to be a funny scene.
Then I thought, so what is the worst thing that could happen? Well the monkeys could get violent and hurt one of the MC's. But then I thought no, a dangerous swamp creature attacks and disappears in the water again. So that made for a tense scene and ended up with Cloud, the guy elf, bitten by this thing, and he will die if Skyla doesn't get him to the bat folk in time to heal his wound. Now the journey from point A to point B got really interesting.
(I didn't proof read this post, so I'm sure there are errors in it.)
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