posted
I had to write an essay for school for a senior paper, and Ender's Game is without a doubt my all time favorite novel. Mind you, I couldn't find any particularly decent commentary that matched my thoughts in outside criticism, so please ignore the little I have as it was required and I tried to trim it and make it work (so some of it's a little out of context). Here goes:
Over population runs rampant throughout the world, leaving millions of men, women, and children starved to the brink of death. China enacted a series of laws to keep this population down, many times involving the death of infants, leaving them by the river to die, or simply a needle of formaldehyde to the brain before their first breath. What if, perhaps, one of these baby girls or boys held the intelligence and the key to solve this problem of over population in their future? Of course just as easily the answer could come from a surviving man or woman. If both are needed to solve the problem, why is one more entitled to life than the other? In the novel Ender’s Game, Card utilizes the motif of a “Third” to promote society’s need for uniqueness and creativity from each individual regardless of their status in society.
Ender’s Game’s author imagines a future of controlled families, a time when parents are allowed only two children, and any child outside of the limit loses all rights and become pariahs of the ‘compliant’ society. These “Thirds” can not attend school, enter normal society, or a number of other privileges most people take for granted. The beginning of the novel describes Thirds as negative, something to be shunned by the “compliant nations”, the countries that make up the international order who abide by this rule of two (Card 22). Card uses the first chapters of the novel to emphasize the importance of segregating between normal children and Thirds. Initially Card does this through the use of a child named Stilson who made it a point to harass Ender for his difference as a Third then later simply through Ender’s own internal monologue about the situation of his existence as a Third and the effects of this on his family. Ender himself is a Third, commissioned on “government waivers that had allowed him to be born” despite having two older siblings (5). As a means of illustrating the problems of being a Third Ender thinks to himself of the embarrassment suffered by his family of having “three kids and no obvious explanation,” though of course this assertion proves to be false at the novel’s end (15). By taking the time to set up these intense emotions towards Thirds Card deepens the importance of the shift of feelings as the story progresses.
Contrary to society’s feelings towards Thirds Ender breaks these class borders that bind others. While society originally views Ender as a “badge of public shame” his successes prove to be too great to keep him confined to people’s pre-conceived notions of the inhumanity of Thirds (23). Despite Ender’s status as Third it is his brain that society needs to defeat the Buggers and it is Ender’s innate creativity that finds the key to victory in the last battle over the Bugger planet. Regardless of what Earth “may feel about other people” they “love [Ender]” (302). By having Ender move from the status of Third to a hero of all humanity reveals Card’s feelings that person can not be judged simply for his place in society, but by what he does in life. It also reveals the need of each person in society no matter where their roots may be, and that a person can not be discounted in the world for an unfortunate birth. One critic feels that Ender was not entirely created through nature, but through the nurture of “early years” that are a “nightmare of persecution because he’s a Third child in an overpopulated world” (Radford 145). According to her criticism, though particularly unconvincingly, Ender’s status as Third influenced his violent nature, making those years particularly important not just as a simple base of slight persecution but as a core to Ender’s entire life and how he handles himself.
Next, to further the opinion that each person is important to society Card explores the lives of two other very important characters, Valentine and Peter Wiggin, Ender’s sister and brother. Both of these characters have very important influences in both Ender’s life and the entire world. These two characters are significant in order to further Card’s opinion of each individual character having an essential place in society. Valentine, Ender’s sister, is both needed to help Ender find his way to saving humanity from the Buggers and to help Peter find his way to saving humanity from themselves. Several times throughout the novel Valentine finds herself as ‘therapy’ for Ender when his motivation to work has burnt out and he’s lost reason to work. This help provided to Ender illustrates the fundamental idea that everyone’s needed for their own ability to impact society, case in point Valentine who consistently reminds Ender of his own humanity and civilization’s need for Ender to be victorious at all costs. Without Valentine’s persuasion Ender would have given up on battle school and easily spent the rest of his life laying on a raft in North Carolina; consequently the war against the Buggers would have been vastly different had Ender not been leading the battle, perhaps even a failure. One critic comments on “the military system Ender is placed in encourages only his intellect” and that he “has to fight the system for room to develop his personality”(Kelly 114). Valentine in her time with Ender helps to develop his personality by giving him a chance to grow, even in the short time they are together. This military personality that the military forces upon Ender never fits him until Valentine is able to talk with Ender on the raft and Ender finally realises what he has to do. In helping Peter Valentine helped prevent a massive world war. At the end of the Bugger War came a potentially vicious war through years of political punditry with Peter. Peter proposed a policy through the nets as Locke, and “Demosthenes got behind it, too” using “Demosthenes influence with the mob and Locke’s influence with the intelligentsia” in order to “accomplish something noteworthy” (Card 311). Without the help of Valentine Peter would never has the support needed to instigate his political coup, launching him finally into world politics as a major player. This in itself influences the world for peace, and very strongly influences Peter’s future. Without either Valentine or Peter the world perhaps could fall into an awful war at the end of the Bugger war, or without Valentine’s sway the Bugger war may never conclude as Ender would never have fought it. Thus, each character, and in affect person, proves to be indispensable to society for one reason or another.
When you can never know what influence a person will have on the world, you can’t simply discount a person. In the case of Ender, though, the child who should not have been in fact became a savior to mankind against the Bugger army, and the first and second before him became leaders in their own right through their own means. Now, when intelligence and hard work comes from each individual person, how can we still in good heart permit harsh population laws throughout the world?
<Inserted lines at JG's paragraph breaks --PJ>
[ May 06, 2005, 12:10 PM: Message edited by: Papa Janitor ]
Posts: 14 | Registered: May 2005
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posted
Interesting piece. Want us to post it in the Research area? It can serve as an example to other students. (But ... DID YOU GET AN A? <grin>)
However, I'd sure appreciate it if you'd edit it and double space between paragraphs so it doesn't look like such a MASSIVE block of text!
And ... let me guess ... the assignment was to write a five-paragraph essay. And you actually wrote an eight-paragraph essay and faked it by making some paragraphs really long <grin>.
OK, maybe not. The "five-paragraph essay" is one of the more horrible things that our educational system does to kids, at least in NC.
Posts: 2005 | Registered: Jul 1999
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quote: the assignment was to write a five-paragraph essay
What's the point of five paragraphs, though? We get them in pages (1-1.5 as homework, or 10-12 for a yearly project), and need to decide the paragraphing ourselves...
Then again, the schooling system here is no better, and probably worse. But that's what you get when 47% of kids in Jerusalem are regarded as "poor". and that's in local terms!
posted
I loathe the five-paragraph essay. Its structure is restrictive and artificial without supplying any benefits, whether artistic or academic. It is a boil on the butt of public education.
Posts: 1814 | Registered: Jul 2004
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posted
heh, in my school I always ignored what my teachers said. SO when they asked me to write an essay I wrote it how I wanted to write it. I got around high 70's usually.
Posts: 1567 | Registered: Oct 2004
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posted
Oops, I didn't realise there was a 'research page' on the forum, otherwise I would've posted it there.
No, it wasn't a five paragraph essay, it just worked out that way between how I broke it up. I don't entirely disagree with the five paragraph set up as it's used mainly for standardised testing as a tool to make things easier and an outline for basic essay writing, which performs quite well in my opinion. In Texas a new system's being made for the new standardised test that basically changes from what we've done our whole lives of writing, so instead of writing the five paragraph-block-style essays we're not writing flowery personal essays with lots of voice. That's what I personally dislike as in the real world writing a personal flowerly essay won't you get you anywhere unless you plan on being a writer, but a plain five-block style essay is something that t eaches you control, which I think most people who work use normally, something more exacted, controlled, standardised basically.
I'm only not sure if I made an A, my inclincation is a no based on some flaws I found when I read it again last night. A lot of the transitions either weren't there or some things just didn't make sense, which I regret, but things are quite a bit more surreal at three in the morning I've found. Whether I make an A on this test will determine whether I'm exempt in my final exam, so pray for me. Lol, plus if I knew I could hop on here and get some personal feedback from the author, I could throw that into my essay and I'm sure my teacher would pee herself in excitement and in 'cool value'.
[ May 06, 2005, 11:06 PM: Message edited by: Jonathan G ]
Posts: 14 | Registered: May 2005
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posted
I hated the structure of the essays they made us write. I mean the idea of Intro-body-conclusion isn't totally ridiculous, especially teaching kids how to write, but the idea that it's a set rule of the universe, and worse, that it actually had to be exactly five paragraphs, as opposed to, at leas just intro, three main points and conclusion is atrocious. But it's especially terrible for persuasive essays. What a stupid idea, that having intro, main points, conclusion will always make the most effective persuasion. Does anyone actually argue like that?
posted
It depends, I suspect some people do. It's a good way of getting your thoughts out coherently.
On this essay and at my school the essays aren't particularly 5-block-paragraphs, but instead just write the paper, divide it out how you want to and you see it to be written, and there you have it. WE don't normally have rules when it comes to the set up of the paper, just generally content and the paragraphs ac tually make sense.
Posts: 14 | Registered: May 2005
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quote:I loathe the five-paragraph essay. Its structure is restrictive and artificial without supplying any benefits, whether artistic or academic
When I was taught the five-paragraph essay, every single sentence had a "purpose" that you were supposed to follow. For example, IIRC, it was the third sentence that had to be the thesis statement. Not fourth, not second. Fifth was right out.
posted
My daughter especially hated the five-paragraph essay because the middle three paragraphs were supposed to be "supporting examples." She said: "What if there are only two? What if there are four?"
Sure, the 5-paragraph essay is used for standardized testing. But why not just have people send in a tape recording of themselves whistling dixie? It would have as much bearing on their ability to think and write well enough to survive in college.
Frankly, I think the five-paragraph essay tests only one thing: Your ability to obey instructions.
But that has nothing to do with the essay at hand. You COULDN'T have posted it yourself in the research area - we here in Upper Management decide what goes up in that area. I'm simply asking your permission and hoping you'll do a new version with more readable paragraphing. Remember that despite what your teachers said, paragraphing is almost completely arbitrary and you can break it up into readable chunks without any harm to the content.
Posts: 2005 | Registered: Jul 1999
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posted
Oh, yeah. I'd love to. Want me to send the word file to some one since it's more readable? I'm not sure if there are tools to put double spaced papers onto the internet in a cohesive fashion or anything.
I'm not en tirely sure which way you thought the paragraphs needed to be cut up... I'll probably personally stick with the way I have it since it's just the way it was written for English. If I have more time this afternoon I'll give it a bit of a crash course in editing it when I'm more 'awake'. Change paragraphs up, add in transitions, and make it flow a little better.
I should know my grade by next Friday so I'll be happy to post how I did, though I still say don't expect much on it.
[ May 07, 2005, 10:45 AM: Message edited by: Jonathan G ]
Posts: 14 | Registered: May 2005
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posted
Hm... Well, Notepad? Wordpad? That's about the extent of my word processor ownership. Otherwise I can just simply post an edited version online, which I guess makes just as much sense.
Posts: 14 | Registered: May 2005
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posted
But, you see, the five-paragraph essays aren't for the STUDENTS at all. The standardized test-graders need a little help sometimes. Let's just make it easier on them and eliminate all essay questions on standardized testing, five-paragraph or otherwise.
And to show our wonderful organization, we can make a list of other reasons why standardized testing is idiocy. It would be a much better use of students' time anyhow. They might actually learn something rather than spend three weeks in utter silence wringing their brains, skipping classes, and nearly losing it because of stress. Posts: 973 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
Alright, sorry to bump this thread up but I made an 89 on the essay. Luckily it brought my grade up to an 86 in the course so now I'm exempt from the exam. Good stuff.
Posts: 14 | Registered: May 2005
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posted
That is almost an A. Oh and *high five* An 89, that is good in my book. Most of the people at my school flunk their five-paragraph essays. And I would, but I enjoy writing. The topics they assign are so BORING. They, being my teachers, don't even let you crack a joke. I've found that the best thing to do is write, nod, smile, and hope the teacher can read messy handwriting. Seeing as I usually write with my left hand, my right being the dominant.
Posts: 6026 | Registered: Dec 2004
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posted
Oye, this wasn't a 'five paragraph essay', it's just how it ended up being written. This essay was written so that we read the book, wrote the question we wanted to answer in our thesis, then wrote the paper on that. It was a pretty free issue, except the literary criticisms that were hard to come by.
Posts: 14 | Registered: May 2005
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