posted
Hey, I'm writing a novel, thanks to the inspiration from the Ender's Saga!
Tell me what you guys think, the title is called A Trade For Peace and this is just an excerpt.
I busted through the door and was surprised to find myself being lunged at by a knife, nearly slicing into my neck, I responded to this threat by kicking my attacker directly in the groin and punched him as hard as I could, I could hear every knuckle of my tightly clenched fist crack. I then resumed with my mission and looked for these so-called “important documents” which were supposed to be in a combination safe, according to the poorly put together mission briefing. I swear, the higher-ranking officers got stupider the more authority they had. It was even worse, for my squad, who was just now catching up to me or at least I hoped so, as I had heard uneven footsteps noises approaching my current position. I slammed the office’s door as fast as I could with the very same leg that had just pummeled the Chinese soldier, just in case these footsteps didn’t belong to my squadron.
Posts: 3 | Registered: Jan 2006
| IP: Logged |
posted
Yes. But stories don't get critiqued in here, they get critiqued in the area I linked you too.
Posts: 1138 | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
In case your wondering (and if you're not I'm puzzled as to why exactly you posted this in here), OSC himself will not comment on you work, whether it's here or there, so there's no sense in posting it in here. If you want your work critiqued by the man himself, I suggest either:
1. Go to the Boot Camp section of the Writers' Workshop, where OSC teaches writing to those who pay for it.
2. Attend one of his classes on writing at any of three Universities in the USA. One is SUV, if I remember rightly; the other two I have no idea about.
3. Email a completed story for submission to OSCs online magazine Intergalactic Medicine Show. If your story fits the type of work he wants, it'll get passed on to him. From there, either i. He'll send you a polite rejection letter with advice on your story with specifics that just about any other magazine editor in the business won't even bother with, or ii. If you're really lucky you'll make a sale. It's worth a try. He likes helping prospective writers so he will definitely appreciate, IMO, the chance to help you in your prospective career.
Anyway, good luck whichever, if any, decision you make. If you took my advice to transfer it to the Fragments and Feedback section I'll be there in a moment to critique it for you.
Posts: 1138 | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
I'm sorry if you find me rude, but I like being rude. I guarantee you the majority of people here are not like me.
Posts: 1138 | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
Blayne Bradley
unregistered
posted
If you involved the PRC in this or a war between the US and the PRC please make it balanced, I've read Bear and the Dragon by Tom Clancy and I was disgusted on how easily the US won without losing a single man yet somehow destroying a multimillion man army.
IP: Logged |
posted
You're just being bias 'cause you're from/in the PRC. Stop whinging, at least he didn't throw Australia in to whoop your butts.
Posts: 1138 | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
posted
Blayne's not from the PRC. He just thinks Chinese women are attractive, and wants to marry into what he believes will someday be the Master Race.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
| IP: Logged |
posted
If he wants to be in the Master race he should come here.
Posts: 1138 | Registered: Nov 2005
| IP: Logged |
Blayne Bradley
unregistered
posted
The Aussies cant do jack, you can barely build an aircraft carrier, your original settler's were criminals and about 70% of your country is a barren wasteland only suitable for nuclear testing. But there is good out of this, the Australian Mutant Super Soldier Project i think has made some progress.... Y'know, with your marsupios able to jump 100 feet in the air and blow themselves up upon landing.
IP: Logged |
quote:Originally posted by cheiros do ender: Yes. But stories don't get critiqued in here, they get critiqued in the area I linked you too.
This, of course, isn't true. Stories do get critiqued in the area linked to, but people's work gets critiqued here now and then as well. Probably better to post it in the BFFC side of the forum, but still.
Welcome to the forums, by the way, Racoon. Hope you find the place to your liking.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
| IP: Logged |
Blayne Bradley
unregistered
posted
Heck, I wouldn't even want the PRC winning overwhelmingly, but something more on the lines of Louis the 14th wars, a bit gained and a bit lost for both sides.
IP: Logged |