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Author Topic: OSC and bad movies
JLM
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I always find it highly amusing how Scott repeatedly wastes money and time to go see lousy movies. I could have told you from ads and trailers that Miami Vice was going to be dark and violent, Ex-Super Girlfriend was going to be silly and unfocused and Ant Bully was going to be cheap and stupid.

But on the other hand there are hundreds of us who get to be amused at his weekly rantings on how crappy Hollywood fims are these days, and yet he keeps sending the message to the Hollywood execs to keep it up by continuing to fork out the $9 tickets.

I can't wait until he reviews Ender's Game. [Big Grin]

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mr_porteiro_head
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On the other hand, he seems to get a lot of pleasure out of watching some movies that I don't think I could sit through.
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King of Men
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I'm not sure if he gets paid for his columns or not. If he does, well, he has to have something to review, right? So it's an investment. Especially since he presumably gets paid more than nine dollars, if he's paid at all. And since the movies would be research, he could get a tax deduction!
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James Tiberius Kirk
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"Uncle Orson Reviews Everything: Enduring bad films so you don't have to."

--j_k

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SC Carver
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Love his books, but have found I only agree with his movie recommendations about 50% of the time.

I donít know about his book reviews. I havenít read many of the ones he has reviewed.

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cmc
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James Tiberius Kirk - that was hysterical.

Oddly enough - I've not read one single movie review of his. On second thought, that's not really that odd since I don't usually read reviews... ; )

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TommySama
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You just can't take everything the brilliant author of Ender's Game as what you might think. He will often times have moral issues with a movie, or think it is cheap or rude. But if you like rude or cheap movies, then his disdain will be your pleasure!

C'mon, Guys. You talk to him on this forum all the time, try thinking about where his thoughts will branch from yours.

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Steev
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My thoughts branch from his on movie reviews.

I love his novels I even agree with him politicaly.

But thoes movies reviews only agree with ME 20% of the time.
[Smile]

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TommySama
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Word.
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pooka
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I know I've tried writing about how craptastic the DaVinci Code is, but the small fact that I haven't seen it seems to impact my credibility.
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Edgehopper
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I agree with his reviews more like 90% of the time...come on, Mr. Card, see some good movies! They're out there...in the animated world, Cars was excellent--and it had all the plausibility that Ant Bully lacked. Well, it's not quite clear why cars would be male or female (remember Robots?), but the internal consistency is there (little VW bugs with wings instead of flies, for example.)

Or...I walked out of My Super-Ex Girlfriend right after the most painful looking sex scene ever to be shown in a supposed comedy, and into Clerks II. What apparently happened was that the advertisers decided to trick us by presenting the movie full of dumb gags (Super-Ex) as a romantic comedy while portraying the excellent romantic comedy (Clerks II) as a series of stupid gags.

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cmc
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Okay. I loved Cars. I loved when Tow Mater said (something like) 'I knew I was right'. Speed replied (something like) 'About what'. Mater replied (something like) 'That you were my best friend'.

Honestly - my eyes got wet.

I'm getting used to this apology and not seeming to be improving - but sorry for the side-track.

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Gwen
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Ah. For me, Cars was a bit too far on the predictable side (and I'm very stupid at predicting things, I always miss the foreshadowings and I've never solved a mystery before the detective has--cryptex answers and anagrams in the Da Vinci Codes don't count--so the plot had to be pretty stock for me to know exactly what was going to happen next) to be all that enjoyable.

But I cheered all through his review of Ella Enchanted.

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cmc
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** you said 'stock' ** ; )

ps - but what about the tractors? did you not laugh??

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Gwen
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Yes, I laughed. I liked the animation, and individual little tiny funny parts, but the story...the story was like every other "stuck-up hotshot comes down to earth" Disney movie I've ever watched. Maybe that's the problem: I've watched the movies on the Disney Channel too often.
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cheiros do ender
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http://www.hatrack.com/osc/reviews/f&sf/89-09.html

quote:
I believe, very strongly, that a reviewer has nothing intelligent to say about a book he despises. This is not out of a sense of good manners or exaggerated gentility. It's because I believe a reviewer should only review a book he understands, and if you find nothing of value in a book, you clearly do not understand it. Every book has a value to somebody, or the author could not have written it.

A review that completely trashes a book says nothing about the book, but it can say several things about the reviewer. In increasing order of repulsiveness, they are:

1. The reviewer is not in the natural audience of the book in question.

2. The reviewer is narcissistic enough to assume that books he doesn't like are objectively bad.

3. The reviewer is willing to accept money and applause for heaping abuse on a person whose worst crime was to offer an imperfect tale to an audience that is quite free to ignore it anyway.

4. The reviewer vents his personal spite against an author by attacking his books, an act roughly comparable to spitting on the children of your enemies.

And this doesn't apply to him writing film reviews, why?
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Gwen
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Have any of his reviews ever completely trashed the movie in question?
He often does find elements that he liked--he'd say, "this is an interesting story with good acting, but I think its message is X and if you agree you'll have a hard time enjoying this movie," for instance.

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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by JLM:
[QB] I always find it highly amusing how Scott repeatedly wastes money and time to go see lousy movies.

My friends and I do this ALL THE TIME. We also scour the internet for new and ever more horrible movies so we can track them down and rent or buy them. Bad movies are often more entertaining in their own way than good movies. (We're also big MST3K fans - I wonder if Mr. Card is, too?)

Personally, I can't wait for "In The Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Movie" to come out. I'm breathless with anticipation. We bought our tickets to Snakes On A Plane three days in advance just in case they sold out on opening night (they didn't).

Bad movies rock.

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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by pooka:
I know I've tried writing about how craptastic the DaVinci Code is, but the small fact that I haven't seen it seems to impact my credibility.

It is every bit as craptastic as you think it is. I'm sure your review is 100% accurate. I can't believe I saw it (although I was expecting it to suck. It delivered and then some!)
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Noemon
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quote:
Originally posted by Libbie:
My friends and I do this ALL THE TIME. We also scour the internet for new and ever more horrible movies so we can track them down and rent or buy them. Bad movies are often more entertaining in their own way than good movies. (We're also big MST3K fans - I wonder if Mr. Card is, too?)

Have you seen Night Train to Venice, by any chance? There is a standing reward being offered by one of our forum members here for anyone who can watch it and provide a coherent summary of the plot.

I tracked down a copy of it, but it's VHS and I haven't felt inspired to actually hook up my old VCR so that I can watch it.

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pooka
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A book is generally the product of an artist working somewhat alone, while movies are much more the product of a group of people. Books are not that great of a financial risk. The publisher evaluates the (basically) finished product before investing in it. With films, millions has to be spent in order to bring about the final product, and it often has to be released whether it was any good or not. One example that comes to mind is "Wild Wild West."

I don't think Card is inherently antithetical toward the movie process. When the team effort works, it is can have beauty and impact that goes beyond what a book can give (do I overreach here?) But when it goes bad, the only saving virtue is that it is over quickly. Though any book that you read isn't working for you doesn't have to be finished, either.

I don't think Card has ever bothered panning a book. I don't think he would finish reading it, but I could be wrong.

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Kenif
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What surprises me more, is that despite seeing so many movies he's not turned into a movie-snob.

I watch loads of movies, but I've become a huge movie-snob. I'll turn my nose at so many movies, I don't have much to see [Big Grin] (oh, that probably explains why being a movie-snob isn't a great idea [Smile] )

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JLM
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quote:
Originally posted by Libbie:


Bad movies rock.

Bad movies rock when they are supposed to be bad. Snakes on a Plane would fall into this catagory.

Bad movies truely suck when they adversise themselves as being something they are not. I think "Wild Wild West" is a perfect example. Advertised as a rip, roaring thrill ride. In reality, a very poor copy of a Terry Gilliam film (and even a lot of Terry Gilliam's films have sucked too.)

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pooka
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It was more like it was badly written and badly directed, and then they tried to make up for that by slapping on some special effects. I'm really amazed that Kevin and Kenneth got together again for "Road to El Dorado", which I actually liked quite a bit.
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Libbie
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[/QUOTE]Have you seen Night Train to Venice, by any chance? There is a standing reward being offered by one of our forum members here for anyone who can watch it and provide a coherent summary of the plot.

I tracked down a copy of it, but it's VHS and I haven't felt inspired to actually hook up my old VCR so that I can watch it. [/QB][/QUOTE]

Not yet - but that's going straight to the top of my list.

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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by JLM:
quote:
Originally posted by Libbie:


Bad movies rock.

Bad movies rock when they are supposed to be bad. Snakes on a Plane would fall into this catagory.

Bad movies truely suck when they adversise themselves as being something they are not. I think "Wild Wild West" is a perfect example. Advertised as a rip, roaring thrill ride. In reality, a very poor copy of a Terry Gilliam film (and even a lot of Terry Gilliam's films have sucked too.)

I disagree with you there. Bad movies that don't TRY to be bad still rock - sometimes even more - but not for any of the reasons the filmmakers hoped to rock.

A great example of this is Teen Witch. The filmmakers wanted this movie to be an inspiring and fun, innocent romp for pre-teens. Instead, it's a celluloid relic to enormous hair, pastel clothing, and some of the worst music the 80's ever spawned.

It's brilliant, but not because it meant to be.

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pooka
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I think "Water World" deserves special consideration. A lot of movies are so bad, they are good. "Water World" was so bad, it was awesome.
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Noemon
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quote:
Originally posted by Libbie:
quote:
Have you seen Night Train to Venice, by any chance? There is a standing reward being offered by one of our forum members here for anyone who can watch it and provide a coherent summary of the plot.

I tracked down a copy of it, but it's VHS and I haven't felt inspired to actually hook up my old VCR so that I can watch it.

Not yet - but that's going straight to the top of my list.
[Smile] I'll be curious to hear your response when you do. Maybe this will motivate me to hook up my VCR and finally subject myself to it.
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Libbie
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quote:
Originally posted by pooka:
I think "Water World" deserves special consideration. A lot of movies are so bad, they are good. "Water World" was so bad, it was awesome.

Yes. I own Water World, because I love to laugh at it. It had a lot of potential; it was just not done right AT ALL. Also, Kevin Costner is a sucky actor.
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Libbie
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quote:
I'll be curious to hear your response when you do. Maybe this will motivate me to hook up my VCR and finally subject myself to it. [/QB]
Okay. I am going to a three-day sculpting seminar this weekend, but I'll try to track it down next Monday and get to work on it.

I live near Scarecrow Video , which prides itself on being able to track down a copy of ANY MOVIE REQUESTED within a few months' time, so I should be able to get it if they don't already have it.

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Noemon
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Ooh, you sculpt? I don't have any particular talent in that regard, but I love sculpting, and sculpture is the form of art other than writing that I find most enthralling. How would you describe your work? Are pictures of any of it online?
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Nathan2006
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Okay, a couple of random things, that have really nothing to do with the topic... But you're still reading, aren't you?

Anyway, I think that bad movies can be tremendously funnier than good movies. I loved watching Disney Channel's 'Cheetah Girls 2', and Star Wars 3, etc. I'm actually just now watching the notebook, and they're on a boat, and it's raining, and they start laughing, and it supposed to be dramatic, but I'm laughing my butt off... Although the rest of the movie has been good until now... Not that it's had my undivided attention, considering that I'm on hatrack.com... Kay, now they're on the bed, he's taking off her panty-hose, and I look over and just see a foot by his head, while he slowly takes them off. How sexy. LOL I have an irreverent sense of humor.

And two, Ant Bully was a socialist movie produced by Julia Roberts because she is trying to decieve our youth, for the upcoming war with antarctica, when the evil android penguins of doom come and kill us all (Except said decieved children, and, of course, Julia Roberts, and Nicholus Cage, who tried to fool us with that 'American Treasure' movie, but I'm not fooled.)

That was an inside joke, and none of you are on the inside; I thought it would get your attention.

Anyway, I've blabbered about nothing for a long time... Wow. I'd backspace it, but I might wear my finger down to a small nub.

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