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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Meet John Maynard

   
Author Topic: Meet John Maynard
Trogdor the Burninator
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John Maynard is a pretty intense Tron fan.

[ April 19, 2004, 02:13 PM: Message edited by: Trogdor the Burninator ]

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Strong Bad
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*beats the crap out of John Maynard*
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KarlEd
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Your link is broken.
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pooka
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I found your link to be broken also.
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KarlEd
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And I really didn't need either of the "side view" photos. But ya gotta give him credit for not succumbing to the Hollywood-image body type.

"If ya got it, flaunt it!
If ya ain't got it. . . well, flaunt it anyway!" [Big Grin]

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Trogdor the Burninator
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fixed link.
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Storm Saxon
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[Laugh] KarlEd

I didn't make it all the way down to him with the costume on. I am weak. :

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T_Smith
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.

[ April 19, 2004, 03:34 PM: Message edited by: T_Smith ]

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Slash the Berzerker
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Ummmm....

He appears not to have any genitalia. This may explain his obsession with making a Tron costume, since the whole idea of "Trying to score with the babes" is a non-issue for him.

[ April 19, 2004, 03:01 PM: Message edited by: Slash the Berzerker ]

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Trogdor the Burninator
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No Slash, I'm pretty sure there's something there. It might be smaller than the average dudes, but there is somethign there.

I will not, however, debate your second point.

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ludosti
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It's Milton! No one steal his TRON suit! [Angst]

[milton]I could burn it down...[/milton]

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Slash the Berzerker
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Imagine the freedom that comes with not having any reason to impress women. Making a really accurate Tron costume is just the tip of the iceberg. Most of our concerns about 'being cool' are sex driven.

Take sex out of the picture, and being cool is a total non-issue.

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Trogdor the Burninator
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quote:
Lessons learned

1. Fabric paint is a pain in the ass to deal with, and must be applied with a heavy hand if sharp edges on lines are desired. It would have probably helped if I had not worn and washed the unitard before painting, as that caused the fabric to pill somewhat, making it much harder to get the paint down into the fabric.
2. If you superglue something to a painted surface, you're not gluing to the item itself, but to the paint. I should have waited the specified 7 days for maximum chip resistance (which means maximum hardness and curing) before trying to glue the el-wire to it.
3. No matter how hard you try, the colors will never match exactly. Don't obsess about it; do the very best you can and quit worrying.
4. I got some slack cut because this was my first masquerade. It'll be tougher to win something next year...and it was suggested that, while I could re-enter this costume, doing so very many times would not be wise. Now, all I have to do is come up with another idea...


5. This is a good way to ensure your DNA is never carried on to another generation.
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Telperion the Silver
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oh good gods.... *shudder* [Angst]

*can't help thinking how good a Tron suit would look on me* [Cool]

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zgator
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quote:
I won an award for workmanship - and the judges said, afterward, that it wasn't even close.
Did anyone else interpret this to mean he was, by far, the biggest loser in attendance?
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zgator
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You would think he would have at least shoved a sock down there or something.
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aretee
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Pat, what the hell is wrong with you? I'm going to have that picture stuck in my head for the rest of the day and I still have one class to teach! Not to mention I need to find myself a therapist!
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JohnKeats
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Do you suppose there are any obese people here on Hatrack that have hobbies? Or feelings, maybe?

[ April 19, 2004, 03:30 PM: Message edited by: JohnKeats ]

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Trogdor the Burninator
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All I ask of them is to not wear a unitard that is five sizes too tight.

And if they must wear a unitard, then they have to make their bulges not so bulgy.

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pooka
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This just shows you should be nice to people. I've I'd always been nice to JK, I would be able to tease him right now. But because I haven't been, all I can say is "Yeah!"
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Telperion the Silver
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Ahhh... how I yearn for the days of the codpiece...
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Trogdor the Burninator
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John Maynard's Blog

An excerpt...

quote:
The story about my costume has made the Slashdot front page. There are, at this writing, 201 comments posted, of which all but about 10 are of the form "augh! Why did I go look? Warning! Fat man in spandex!". I expected nothing less from that crowd, so I'm not worried. (I won't be worried, either, if it somehow gets to Fark or SomethingAwful.)
I posted the page, and the pictures, and the story, because I wanted to offer ideas and assistance to those contemplating a similar thing. The juvenile types who can do nothing but criticize and denigrate are not my audience, and I don't really give a fuzzy rat's ass what they think. I also refuse to allow them to get me down, as I'm quite comfortable with who and what I am, in all its ramifications.


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jexx
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Um. I think it wasn't so much that he is a Large Person (hey, lots of us are Comfortably Made), it was the oddness of his private area. The...uncomfortably positioned and squooshedness of it all. Really. Perhaps a protective cup would have been in order.

I do think the Tron suit is cool. Not a babe magnet, but looked like fun.

I am a geek.

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pooka
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Well, I do sincerely hope he doesn't have any health problems, either connected to his girth or his used of fabric paint.
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Ralphie
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The rare, male camel-toe.
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Ryan Hart
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::ralphs all over the place::
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skillery
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It seems to be growing the further down the page you go.
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Ralphie
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Well, he's getting excited about how the outfit is coming along swimmingly.
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Ralphie
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btw - There's both a front and back camel-toe. I think that's worth bonus-points.
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Boon
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Hehehe...this guy was just on TV! [ROFL]
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Lalo
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Heh. Wow.

Am I the only one who has heaps of respect for the guy's balls? Not so much for his actual balls (poor bastard), but this kind of self-security is a rare find in modern America.

John Maynard, I salute you. And you, apparently, salute us all right back.

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