Be one with the ooze. Life has its ups and its downs. Sometimes we are merged and sometimes we part. It is the way of things. The best you can do is share your light with the world and give a little happiness to others that you meet along the way.
Remember, it doesn't matter what color the ooze is, or the surrounding liquid. What you are is what you are. Accept it move along. Often, what you'll find is that as you are falling down, you'll meet your own self rising up.
Black Mage - I have not yet experienced anything as heinous as my teenage years. Granted, I'm only 26. But every year I'm further away from a teen is a triumphant, happy year.
The problem with being a teenager is that you're going through a time period of deep introspection while simultaneously trying to develop the tools deep introspection needs not to become out-and-out self-obsession. It's nearly impossible to get a handle on how you feel about yourself - one day you think you're cool, the next day you think you deserve death - and you're still under the delusion that you must base your successes and failures on the guy next to you. You're okay looking, but not as good looking as that person. You're smart, but not as smart as so-and-so. And so on and so forth.
Plus, you FEEL like you should know it all, already, otherwise you're el stupido. It takes a while to realize that nobody has it all figured out yet, cause adults just seem so SMRT (even if we don't want to admit it). And you want so much to be an adult, too.
"Spiderman" had a surprisingly poignant line in it. When Ben Parker tells Peter something to the effect of, "These are the days when a man is becoming who he will be for the rest of his life." That line is pretty accurate. And since you're going through monster changes, it's OKAY to be mopey, despondent, etc... That's pretty natural. It's also natural to surround yourself with the deluded but comforting feeling that you might know everything - if you didn't, you would never move out of your parents house. BUT, it's equally important to realize this is a phase (as lame as "just a phase" sounds), and that life will improve dramatically if you take these years when people still have to provide you with food and clothing or be imprisoned to really fine-tune your mental innards. Take this time to realize (maybe not what you want to do for employment, who you want to marry, etc... but,) what KIND of person you want to be.
And then start being that person, even if it fosters censure and ridicule from peers.
That probably didn't help at all, did it?
Posts: 7600 | Registered: Jan 2001
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Okay. . . partly my actions here are gonna sound real stupid, but remember, I wasn't thinking straight. SO this wasn't teenage angst.
Last night I hit my head. Rather hard, actually. I felt dizzy and so I sat down. Immediately I started feeling really mopey and I kept half breaking into tears and wondering why.
Now this is where'll I'll really sound like an idiot. Remember, blows to the head impair judgement.
I thought I might have a concussion, but I didn't want to say anything because I thought if I didn't have one, I'd end up looking really stupid; however, I especially didn't want to go to sleep, because I know if you sleep after a concussion you can go into a coma.
So I came up to my room and started IMing people. I felt really restless, so I wouldn't have slept anyway, but I kept feeling like I getting woozy.
I started IMing people, because talking focused me. Most of my friends were heading off to bed, so no good. Then I put up this thread. By that time I was really confused, I think. It's partially where the "teenage angst" thing came from.
I talked to TT&T for a while. I probably babbled, but I got focused. Then I went into a Hatrack chat room. After a while, I started feeling better, so I went to sleep. Possibly another small stupidity.
But I'm fine today, thank God. Thanks to everyone who put up with me last night. I don't know if I acted like a total idiot, so if I did, sorry, and thanks once more.
See ya next time I hurt myself.
Posts: 767 | Registered: Oct 2003
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Have you thought about going and getting checked out by a doctor anyway? I'm not overly informed about concussions, but from what you've described, it sounds to me like you might well have had one, in which case my understanding is that you should definately see a doctor just to be safe. (Even if the symptoms seem to have passed)
In any case, glad to hear you're feeling better.
Posts: 466 | Registered: Sep 2003
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