posted
I thought it might be fun to post our favorite euphemisms. Personally I loved the one Jude Law used to describe an alcoholic in Closer. Instead of saying that the man was an alcoholic, he stated that “he was a convivial fellow”.
Fun stuff ^_^
Posts: 37 | Registered: Oct 2005
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posted
I don't know that this really counts as a euphamism, but I love "the contagion of slumber assails me" in place of "I'm tired". I got this one from a Krazy Kat cartoon.
Another good one is "Disencumbered from it's earthly shroud" in place of "dug up". That one's from a 19th century paleontological paper.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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posted
My pet peeve and sure to make someone mad: Educator instead of teacher. My dad was a teacher and proud of it. Many of the great, well, teachers of the world were teachers. Educators? Sounds like someone trying to force-feed "education" down someone's throat. Yuck. Sterile, unappealing, politically correct attempt to raise teachers out of the undeservedly low esteem in which they're held by the public. I still prefer "teacher" as a term of honor.
*getting down off soapbox*
Posts: 3149 | Registered: Jul 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Kama: what if you're a bad teacher? you hinder learning?
Not to insult everyone here, because I know that it is wrong, and I do not agree with it, but back when I was in High School, the kids used to say, "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach gym."
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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posted
I don't know if this is a euphemism or just a bad choice of words, but I can't stand it when a newspaper or magazine makes an error, runs a correction, and after the correction says, "Newspaper X regrets this error." They really should say "Newspaper X apologizes for this error," since they slipped up; I think when you regret something you did it means that you thought (with good reason) that it was a good idea at the time but that it turned out not to be because of something that wasn't your fault and/or couldn't have been foreseen.
Posts: 781 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
'Power cycle' for 'turn off and on again'. 'Undocumented feature' for 'bug'. 'Religion' for ... ah, never mind, I'll be good.
Posts: 10645 | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Omega M.: I think when you regret something you did it means that you thought (with good reason) that it was a good idea at the time but that it turned out not to be because of something that wasn't your fault and/or couldn't have been foreseen.
Politicians use that language to appear to apologize while really not doing so all the time.
My latest favorite euphamism is "telephone sanitizer." It actually means "toilet cleaner."
Leave it to the Brits...
Posts: 73 | Registered: Oct 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Tante Shvester: Not to insult everyone here, because I know that it is wrong, and I do not agree with it, but back when I was in High School, the kids used to say, "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach gym."
No, no, no Tante. It's those who can, teach. Those who can't, administrate.
And I really, really hate euphemisms. And the one I hate the most, I think, is "collateral damage", as used by the military to try to make noncombatant casualties palatable to the public.
Posts: 2454 | Registered: Jan 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Tante Shvester: when I was in High School, the kids used to say, "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach gym."
No, no, no Tante. It's those who can, teach. Those who can't, administrate.
Perhaps that was the version in your high school. You never met our gym teachers.
Posts: 10397 | Registered: Jun 2005
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posted
Any euphemism relating to death. Just say dead, died, death. I do use the word 'lost" sometimes but rarely. I find this to be the worst among other parents who have lost babies, who use such phrases as " angelversery" ( date of the baby's death), earned his wings", etc.
Dead is dead.
On a lighter note, I thing any euphamism I learned with working for The Corporation Formally Known as Kinkos to be laughable.
Posts: 2711 | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
Telephone sanitizer? Wasn't that one of the jobs of the people being deported to Earth in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe?
Posts: 781 | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
There's a whole subclass of these language monstrosities I refer to as "euthanisms" -
soft-core language used to make the idea of killing people in relation to assisted suicide, etc. more acceptable.
Replacing terms like "suicide" or "euthanasia" - terms such as "hastening death" and "self-deliverance" are being used and promoted.
(Believe it or not, it makes a big difference when pollsters use "assisted suicide" or "hastened death" in asking questions. Recently, a major pro-assisted suicide advocacy group urged the press to abandon the term "assisted suicide" in favor of "hastened death.")
The press might actually go for it.
"End of life decisions" is another good one. It's not always a euphemism. OTOH, I've read journal articles lately in which "end of life decisions" were clearly defined as "decisions to end a life" (one was about disabled newborns). Not only euphemistic - it has an elegant circular logic going for it.
Posts: 4344 | Registered: Mar 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Tante Shvester: Not to insult everyone here, because I know that it is wrong, and I do not agree with it, but back when I was in High School, the kids used to say, "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach gym."
No, no, no Tante. It's those who can, teach. Those who can't, administrate.
No, no, no!
Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach teachers.
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted
Another not-exactly-a-euphamism that I've enjoyed for a long time, also from a Krazy Kat cartoon, is referring to falling asleep as "beaching upon the shore of snores". I really like the fun that George Herriman was willing to have with the language in his strips.
Posts: 16059 | Registered: Aug 2000
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quote:Any euphemism relating to death. Just say dead, died, death. I do use the word 'lost" sometimes but rarely. I find this to be the worst among other parents who have lost babies, who use such phrases as " angelversery" ( date of the baby's death), earned his wings", etc.
This is really interesting. I met a woman this week who said that her 4 year old daughter drowned. It was so baldly stated that I actually didn't understand her at first. Yes, drowned as in dead, and is no longer living. I'm so used to the euphamisms that said starkly, it functioned to hinder communication instead of enhance it. How strange, eh?
Posts: 5948 | Registered: Jun 2001
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posted
Here's a bunch to replace "Go to the toilet".
Answer the call of nature, be excused, check on the scones, do the necessary, ease yourself, explore the geopgraphy of the house, find a haven of refuge, freshen up, go into retreat, go to Egypt, go to the library, go to your private office, lay some cable, mail a letter, pay a visit to your uncle, pick a rose, powder your nose, relieve yourself, see a man about a horse, see your aunt, shoot a dog, shoot a lion, use the cloakroom, use the facilities, visit Sir John, visit the bathroom, viisit the old soldiers' home, wash your hands.
The list will never end...
Posts: 37 | Registered: Oct 2005
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posted
This thread reminds me of a completely inappropriate song by Henry Phillips. But I won't go into that.
Posts: 21182 | Registered: Sep 2004
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I actually had a hard time locating toilets in one of the department stores in Scotland cause they were called cloakrooms.
Posts: 5700 | Registered: Feb 2002
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posted
I hate the euphamisms for death. My mother did not pass on, go to the next life, or stop being around. She died. It did startle people sometimes. At least I never used adverbs.
Posts: 26077 | Registered: Mar 2000
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