quote:Originally posted by ElJay: DaisyMae, I didn't think you intended ill-will or condensation towards women who choose to or have to work, children or no. What I was objecting to was that your post was as unintentionally hurtful to many women as these magazine articles are unintentionally hurtful to you. That's why I started my post the way I did:
quote:So, I understand that this is an emotional topic for you. But just as you feel marginalized by the media sometimes, please remember that those of us who choose not to have kids also face a lot of critisism and charges that there's something wrong with us for not wanting to have kids.
I'm just asking that you try to have the same consideration towards others in your posts that you're asking us to have towards you. We're not trying to be offended. Just like you aren't trying to be offended by the articles you object to.
I was actually hurt by your first post. So what was I supposed to do about it, if not let you know why? I don't think I took anything you said out of context.
I am sorry to those who took offense to my words. I do appreciate those who let me know that what I've said can be seen that way without sarcasm and jumping to conclusions.
Thank you for laying it out for me in a way I can better understand, and just to set the record straight, I think that every woman can only make her own choice about whether or not to have a family. My big deal is that if she does, those kids should be first priority. A man I greatly respect once said, "No success can compensate for failure in the home." That's basically what I've been trying to say in too many words.
Posts: 293 | Registered: Sep 2006
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quote:Originally posted by DaisyMae: how VITALLY IMPORTANT it is to be a good parent and raise your kids well. It is the MOST important thing a woman could EVER do.
It is also the MOST important thing a MAN could EVER do.
Posts: 202 | Registered: Nov 2005
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I don't think it's necessarily the most important thing. I'm sure people who choose not to have kids don't think it's the most important thing. If you HAVE kids it's important. If you don't...not so much.
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Just wanted to weigh in and say that while I agree that drinking in such a way that judgement is impaired (eg. driving, dealing with boiling water, sharp knives, etc. become bad ideas) while keeping an eye on kids is wrong, or any paid caretaker drinking at all, or using alcohol to self-medicate or feel better are NOT good things, I really don't think it's a big deal for a mother, father, or group of moms or dads, to drink as long as they are modeling appropriate, safe drinking.
C'mon now, my dad would have a beer while he watched football, sometime my parents drank wine with dinner, or they'd have drinks if friends were over for a poker game or something. I have never, to this day, seen my parents drunk, and barring a metabolic problem with breaking down alcohol, it seems extreme to me to suggest that a parent having an alcoholic beverage is automatically irresponsible.*
*This is in reaction to some posts here; I'm not sure that the NYT article really implied this. I am puzzled as to why the NYT felt this was worth wirting an article about . . . also didn't seem especially well written, but oh well.
Posts: 471 | Registered: Jul 2005
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quote:I'm not sure that the NYT article really implied this. I am puzzled as to why the NYT felt this was worth wirting an article about . . . also didn't seem especially well written, but oh well.
I think Mrs. M had it right-- the NYT seems lately to have an agenda against moms who don't work, I have no idea why.
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