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When two old ladies cross the English chanell to see Jean-Paul Sartre, but "Mrs. Jean-Paul Sartre" informs them that he is out distributing pamphlets saying "it's the Bourgeoisie this and the Bourgeoisie that. We never have anyone nice over for dinner."
The schoo scene in Meaning of Life, which is so much like my school as to be scarry.
quote: Now, two boys have been found rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant. Now, some of you may feel that the cormorant does not play an important part in the life of the school, but I would remind you that it was presented to us by the Corporation of the town of Sudbury to commemorate Empire Day, when we try to remember the names of all those from the Sudbury area who so gallantly gave their lives to keep China British. So, from now on, the cormorant is strictly out of bounds! Oh, and Jenkins, apparently your mother died this morning. Chaplain?
The What have the Romans ever done for us sequence in Life of Brian:
quote: But apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh-water system, and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?
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The Mr. Hilter sketch, which I've never heard word one about from anyone. I laughed until I cried; I don't know why but when Michael Palin started going on about Dicky old chap and nein, nein, was never head of Gestapo, I make joke, I was practically wetting my pants I was laughing so hard.
(I'm getting tears of suppressed laughter in my eyes just thinking of it.)
Same thing with the silly job interview, when John Cleese rings a bell. That one always kills me.
posted
"...And this is how we know the world to be banana-shaped."
"Fascinating. Explain again how sheeps' bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes?"
"Certainly, sir -- "
This is from the Holy Grail, a conversation between Arthur and Bendavere, right before they come to Camelot. It's a bit I missed the first 20 billion times I saw it, and then one time I randomly heard it. I guess I had the sound up louder.
Posts: 464 | Registered: Jul 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Soara: "...And this is how we know the world to be banana-shaped."
"Fascinating. Explain again how sheeps' bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes?"
"Certainly, sir -- "
This is from the Holy Grail, a conversation between Arthur and Bendavere, right before they come to Camelot. It's a bit I missed the first 20 billion times I saw it, and then one time I randomly heard it. I guess I had the sound up louder.
Bit off.
"This new learning amazes me Sir Bedevere, explain to me again how sheeps' bladder may be employed to prevent earthquakes?"
More and more I love two parts:
Sir Bedevere - "OoooOOO!" Sir Lancelot - "No no, ahhhhrg, at the back of the throat." Sir Bedevere - "No no no no, oooo, in surprise and alarm." Sir Lancelot - "Oh you mean sort of a, AHHH!" Sir Bedevere - "Yes that's right, ahhhH!"
&
Tim the Enchanter - "He's got huge fangs, he can leap about....LOOK at the BONES!"
Or basically anything involving Tim the Enchanter.
Edit: Changed the "OOO" quote sequence, removed a line, and made it more correct. Firstly, I don't consider "oooOooo!" to be a line, so much as a sound, so I don't count it.
quote:Sir Bedevere - "OoooOOO!" Sir Lancelot - "No it's more of a back of the throat, ahhhhhrg!" Sir Bedevere - "No, oooo, as in surprise and alarm." Sir Lancelot - "Oh you mean as a sort of, um, AHHH!" Sir Bedevere - "Yes, ahhhH!" Brother Maynard - "Oh no! It's the dreaded black beast of AHHHHHHH!"
I'm going to be obnoxious and point out the absurdity of a certain rule but: I believe the two line rule applies here. -- Sorry Lyrhawn, not aimed at you, ran into it in another thread just now so it's on my mind, and your post is an excellent example of exactly how absurd it is. It would require that you only post two lines of that, but nearly everyone here could quote it from memory, and often do in public with other people. But only posting two lines of it doesn't quite give the same humor or pleasure, to you or the readers.
As for some of my favorite bits:
The Camouflage Sketch ("Mr. Bradshaw cannot be seen. Mr. Bradshaw, stand up, please." *stands up* *gets shot* "This demonstrates the value of not being seen.")
The Dead Parrot Sketch ("If you hadn't nailed it to the perch it'd be pushing up the daisies! It's run down the curtain and joined the choir invisible! This is an XPARROT.")
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posted
I changed a bit of it, but I don't consider THAT to be a violation, and here's why:
What do you consider "two lines" to be? Do you mean two ACTUAL lines, as in, whatever I can fit in from one side of the page to the other twice?
Or do you consider a line to be a single quotation?
If I change the spacing on my quote, it's less than two lines:
quote:Sir Bedevere - "OoooOOO!" Sir Lancelot - "No it's more of a back of the throat, ahhhhhrg!" Sir Bedevere - "No, oooo, as in surprise and alarm." Sir Lancelot - "Oh you mean as a sort of, um, AHHH!" Sir Bedevere - "Yes, ahhhH!"
However, if you mean single quotes, being whatever falls between the " " marks, then I can come up with speeches that would go on for several inches of space on the thread, all said by a single person with no interruptions. Either way, I don't think my quotation violates the spirit of the rule, or in fact, literally violates it.
If PJ disagrees, I'll chop off half the quote to fit the guidelines, or more likely, the whole thing, as it really doesn't make sense with half of it gone, but I think it's within the guidelines.
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posted
I don't want you to chop it off or change it. I hate that rule. I also think people often go overkill trying to enforce it. People call 'two line' on the things that... well like this. I suppose you could call my previous post ill conceived satire, spawned of me being up way too late.
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quote:The Everyone was terrified of Doug. I've seen grown men pull their own heads off rather than see Doug. Even Dinsdale was frightened of Doug. He used... sarcasm. He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and... satire. He was vicious.
and
quote: Rogers: I understand he also nailed your wife's head to a coffee table. Isn't that true Mrs O' Tracy? Mrs O' Tracy: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Stig: Well he did do that, yeah. He was a hard man. Vicious but fair.
"Not necessarily, I could be arguing with you in my spare time."
Put me in stitches, what a great conclusion to a superb build up.
"Why do you want to, why do you want to, why do you, why do you, why, why ,why do you, WHY DO YOU WANT TO JOIN THE SECRET SERVICE!?"
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