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Author Topic: Family Planning
Anonymous Inquisitor
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I know that Hatrack has a great deal of knowledgeable folks with a wide range of areas of expertise. That is why I come to you with a question regarding family planning. I apologize if this in any way violates the TOS. If the topic is in any way offensive, I will remove the post.

Since the topic deals with family planning, I will warn you to not scroll down unless you want to participate in this discussion.

Question below...................







































My wife and I want to delay in having a child for a while, and up to now have been using the following methods of birth control: First, she is on a hormonal contraceptive known as the Nuva Ring. She and I both feel that, though this has something like a 99% success rate, it is not enough to guarantee not having a child too soon. Thus we have been supplementing this hormonal method with the use of condoms. I would like to find an alternative to condoms due to what I shall call 'sensation loss', while retaining reasonable assurance that we will not conceive early.

Thus, if any of you Hatrackers out there are familiar with the field of family planning, I would appreciate any of your suggestions.

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Tante Shvester
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Diaphragm used with spermicidal jelly ought to do the trick.
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Christine
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You have five basic methods of birth control:

1. hormones (doubling up on this would be BAD)
2. Barrier methods (this includes condoms and diagrams)
3. spermicides
4. natural family planning (which, given your level of paranoia about not getting pregnant, wouldn't be very good for you)
5. abstinence (and also the only 100% effective method)


You might consider looking into is the diagram, but these aren't as effective as condoms and many women don't like them. (raises hand)

You could also just use a bit of spermicide to add a little extra warm fuzzy. This can also be lubricating. :=)

Spermicides aren't great by themselves, but keep in mind you already have a 99% effective form of birth control going on.

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MattP
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I 2nd/3rd the diaphragm suggestion.
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Anonymous Inquisitor
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Expert consultation will indeed be sought.

The interesting thing is that studies have (apparently) been done detailing the effectiveness of single methods of contraceptive use. What would be useful for our purposes is seeing the results of studies in which participants used two methods. I mean, sure, you could calculate the statistics mathematically, but that would merely be guesswork.

At this point, I will need an expert's input to determine whether Nuva combined with a spermicide (film or fluid) would be a sufficient prevention for conception.

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Blayne Bradley
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Don't condoms also because of the sensation loss delay the moment of orgasm in a male? Isn't that a win-win?
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downwardog
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get this book:
http://www.gardenoffertility.com/honoringourcycles.shtml

then your wife can tell which days she's fertile, and don't have the-kind-of-sex-that-can-result-in-pregnancy on those days.

Later, you can use the same information to get her all pregnant.

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Jhai
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You could try switching to another hormonal birth control with a slightly higher rate of prevention. The shot (Depo-Provera), for instance, has a 99.7% prevention rate over a year's time. It also doesn't blood clots as a possible side effect, unlike estrogen-based BC. Of course, one of its more common side effects is halting the woman's period, which might not be a good idea if you tend to worry about these things. It's a major plus for me, though.

We tried using diaphragms for awhile, and found them lacking. Also, I was always worried about whether I had inserted it correctly or not.

Perhaps a copper IUD could be used with a hormonal method? That might be something you might want to consult your expert about.

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Anonymous Inquisitor
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She was on DP for several years, but her OB-GYN recommended making a change after that period of time. I'm not sure what the reasoning behind that was. Since that change, however, we have been concerned regarding the lower success rate for the Nuva ring.
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Jhai
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The ob-gyn might have recommended switching because DP basically makes your body think that you're post-menopause - which includes decreased calcium uptake and worries of osteoporosis. So being on DP for a significant amount of time could lead to trouble when she's older.
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Perplexity'sDaughter
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My sister has an IUD called Mirena. I'm also getting it sometime this month.

It's a little device that any GYN can put in at a regular office visit, and it lasts for up to five years and can be taken out whenever you want, with full fertility returning in about a month. It's 99.99% effective and is supposed to be even more effective than male or female sterilization.


There are a few side affects, of course, like cramping, a little weight gain, ect.

Anyway, there's a lot more info about it; I'm sure you can just google their website.

Good luck!Ü

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Christine
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I don't believe they recommend the IUD unless you've already had a baby.

The DP shot is NASTY when it comes to side effects. I wouldn't touch that stuff with a fifty foot pole.

downwardog: You can't use fertility awareness (natural family planning) in conjunction with a hormonal method because the hormones work by preventing ovulation most of the time. I agree that it's a great thing to look at for any couple trying to conceive, though.

As for the effectiveness of combined methods -- I'm sure that's harder to test. I don't know what kind of odds you're looking for, but even with the nuva ring alone you're at 99%.

It sounds like you may want to talk to your wife's ob/gyn about your concerns because you seem to have a higher need to avoid pregnancy than most.

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Allegra
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I was just talking to my docor about an IUD. She said that having a baby makes it easier and less painful to fit, but is not mandatory.
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Jhai
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I've been told by my ob-gyn that IUD's are fine if you haven't had a kid - it was one of the few options of birth control available to me after I got a blood clot from the pill. We eventually decided not to use it, as I was already bleeding heavily from coumadin, and there was no need to court anemia more than I already was (an IUD can often increase the heaviness of periods). IUDs are extremely common overseas - Planned Parenthood lists them as the most popular form of birth control worldwide.

However, I have been on the DP shot for over a year with no negative side effects at all. My period has pretty much stopped, but that's a major plus for me, not a minus (less risk of anemia, no cramps, no monthly moodiness). I've gained some weight, but that was from senior-thesis-induced stress and no exercise, not the shot. I just take my calcium pills to help reduce the chance of osteoporosis in the future (need to start exercising as well).

The Mirena IUD is hormonal, so you shouldn't plan on using it along with another hormonal form of BC.

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Scott R
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quote:
2. Barrier methods (this includes condoms and diagrams)
It depends on the content of the diagram. Also, the style plays an important part. Is it a pie-chart? Bar graph?

These are important decision that you need to discuss with your partner. Nothing is more conducive to having a healthy, intimate relationships than good diagram use. And nothing can destroy the mood more thoroughly than diagram mismatch.

All in all, be sensitive to your partner's needs, and realize that while she may prefer a bar-graph one time, the next time she may be daring enough to try full-color pie charts.

Good luck!

[Smile]

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Samprimary
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Replacing the condom barrier with a diaphragm/spermicide barrier and keeping it combined with the hormonal contraceptive will remove the sensation issues and keep baby chances at lightning-strike levels of probability.
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Tante Shvester
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quote:
Originally posted by Scott R:
quote:
2. Barrier methods (this includes condoms and diagrams)
It depends on the content of the diagram. Also, the style plays an important part. Is it a pie-chart? Bar graph?
Well, since I'm assuming that the couple is planning, um, intersection, that would have to be a Venn diagram, no?
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Stephan
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Just use a condom, cheap and easy. My wife is on birth control and it is what we do.
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Samprimary
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quote:
Well, since I'm assuming that the couple is planning, um, intersection, that would have to be a Venn diagram, no?
Mm, you know that cliche'd thing where people are like 'blaarg, you have made me spit coffee on my keyboard and monitor, blaarg'

yyeah.

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Christine
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All right, already, are you done having fun about my misspelling? Geesh... [Smile]
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dawnmaria
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Before I had my daughter and we we're in the same situation, I tried to get my Gyno to put in an IUD. She wouldn't because I had not had a child. Her reason was not just that it would be easier to insert if I'd had a child, but that a possible side effect of an IUD is Pelvic Inflamitory Disease which can lead to sterility. That kind of changed my mind on that one. After my son is born in a few months, I may get the one that has the hormones in it. My sister has been on it for years with no side effects and no periods! I will also be sending the Hubby in to be "surgically alterred", I just want the IUD to be sure for the first year or so. 2 kids is enough for me! I don't want them to out number us!
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Scott R
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quote:
2 kids is enough for me! I don't want them to out number us!
Zone defense.
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kmbboots
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quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
Replacing the condom barrier with a diaphragm/spermicide barrier and keeping it combined with the hormonal contraceptive will remove the sensation issues and keep baby chances at lightning-strike levels of probability.

Can be slightly problematic as the spermicide can taste unpleasant.
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Stephan
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quote:
Originally posted by Christine:
You have five basic methods of birth control:

1. hormones (doubling up on this would be BAD)
2. Barrier methods (this includes condoms and diagrams)
3. spermicides
4. natural family planning (which, given your level of paranoia about not getting pregnant, wouldn't be very good for you)
5. abstinence (and also the only 100% effective method)


You might consider looking into is the diagram, but these aren't as effective as condoms and many women don't like them. (raises hand)

You could also just use a bit of spermicide to add a little extra warm fuzzy. This can also be lubricating. :=)

Spermicides aren't great by themselves, but keep in mind you already have a 99% effective form of birth control going on.

Depending on the definition of abstinence, there is a 6th. Bill Clinton would call it abstinence, a church would not.
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mackillian
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quote:
Zone defense.
[ROFL]
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pH
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quote:
Originally posted by kmbboots:
quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
Replacing the condom barrier with a diaphragm/spermicide barrier and keeping it combined with the hormonal contraceptive will remove the sensation issues and keep baby chances at lightning-strike levels of probability.

Can be slightly problematic as the spermicide can taste unpleasant.
Spermicide can increase the chances of UTI or cause allergic reaction or irritation.

-pH

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kmbboots
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Also true.
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dawnmaria
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And one more thing I'd like to add. Just my 2 cents for what it's worth, I think it's great that you're waiting until you're ready to have kids. I think it's a big step and it does change your life dramatically even when you feel prepared. (You never really are!) But don't wait forever. The "perfect time" will never come and as soon as you turn 35 the doctors start to treat you like a dinosaur! It is harder when you get older in many, many ways. And I found it truly ironic that I spent my youth trying to avoid getting pregnant but then spent my early 30's desperately trying to get pregnant! My Hubby and I used to joke that we should try doing it in the back of his car in my Mom's drive way. That probably would have worked sooner!
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Christine
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quote:
Originally posted by Stephan:
quote:
Originally posted by Christine:
You have five basic methods of birth control:

1. hormones (doubling up on this would be BAD)
2. Barrier methods (this includes condoms and diagrams)
3. spermicides
4. natural family planning (which, given your level of paranoia about not getting pregnant, wouldn't be very good for you)
5. abstinence (and also the only 100% effective method)


You might consider looking into is the diagram, but these aren't as effective as condoms and many women don't like them. (raises hand)

You could also just use a bit of spermicide to add a little extra warm fuzzy. This can also be lubricating. :=)

Spermicides aren't great by themselves, but keep in mind you already have a 99% effective form of birth control going on.

Depending on the definition of abstinence, there is a 6th. Bill Clinton would call it abstinence, a church
would not.

Well...as we're talking about a married couple I used "abstinence" to mean no intercourse. I'll leave it to the couple to decide whether or not they think other sexual acts are right within a marriage or not. [Smile]
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Xavier
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quote:
Don't condoms also because of the sensation loss delay the moment of orgasm in a male? Isn't that a win-win?
Only if you have problems delaying orgasms without one. I haven't had that particular problem in years.
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ketchupqueen
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quote:
Originally posted by Blayne Bradley:
Don't condoms also because of the sensation loss delay the moment of orgasm in a male? Isn't that a win-win?

Depends who you're talking to.
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