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While looking for something to do on a cold and rainy day at Grandma's house, my son and I sat down and wrote a story.
Sasha and the Gallumpus.
One day Sasha saw a strange thing just sitting there, floating in the air. It was a about the size of a large man's hand, with five long tails trailing off the end.
As it floated near, Sasha raised his hand to see if he could touch it or pet it. As he raised his hand his shirt, which was 1/2 size too small, popped up, showing his bellybutton to the world.
In a flash this strange thing flexed its tails and swam through the air. Then it took those soft furry tails and proceeded to tickle that bare belly.
Sasha laughed.
He laughed and he laughed and he laughed so loud why his parents heard at once.
They came in to see what was so funny, but when they saw what was happening they got worried.
"What is tickling Sasha?" asked Dad.
"I don't know? I think we need to call Master Wiggins." said Momma.
Now, if this were a bad guy, Mom and Dad would call the police. If this were a fire, Mom and Dad would call the firemen. And if this were an illness, Mom and Dad would call the doctor.
But this was a strange thing. So Mom and Dad called the expert on strange, Master Wiggins.
Master Wiggins was a short little man with a short white beard and a short white lab coat and great big glasses three times to big for his head.
When he heard what was going on he told Mom and Dad, "tsk, tsk. Dear me. I'll be over in a jiffy."
MORE TO COME TOMORROW. I have to get to my bed now.
Posts: 1941 | Registered: Feb 2003
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Dad would not wait. He reached down and grabbed the mysterious creature and he pulled it up.
And it pulled him down.
Up
Down
Up
Suddenly the doorbell rang. Mom went to answer it.
When she came back Sasha was standing up, and the creature had quit fighting Dad. Instead it crawled up his arm and started tickling his funny bone.
"That is not funny." Dad said.
Then he smirked.
The creature continued to tickle.
Dad cracked a small smile. "I am not happy..." he started.
Then he let out a giggle.
Then a squint.
Then a loud, house shaking guffaw.
The creature was tickling Dad's funny bone, and Dad was laughing.
Mom gasped.
Master Wiggins looked up and said, "tsk, tsk. Oh my."
"What should we do?" asked Sasha.
"I'll hit it with a stick." said Mom. "That will teach it to tickle my family."
"Oh no. You must not do that." said Master Wiggins. "You can not hurt a gallumpus by hitting it."
"A what?" asked Sasha.
"A Gallumpus. It is a wild tickle-monster that feeds off of laughs. Quite fun, but quite persistant."
Mom was upset that a stick couldn't be used. "What should we do then? Eat it?"
"Oh know," said Master Wiggins. "You had best not eat it. Why then it will crawl down your throat and tickle your belly from the inside. Its quite hard for the doctors to remove it then, since your are laughing and squirming so much."
Dad added between laughs, "Well, what can we do. How do we stop a Gallumpus?"
Master Wiggins sat down and thought.
"Gallumpus," the thought. "Gallumpus, gallumpus, gallumpus. Hmmmmmmmmmm."
And poor Dad. He just laughed and laughed and between each laugh he tried to be stern. "Now listen hear Mr. Gallumpus. You quit this innapropriate behahahahahahahaha." He never did get very far.
Suddenly Mr. Wiggins jumped up. "I've got it!" he yelled. "Come here Sasha. I need you to think very hard. Is there any spot on your body that is not ticklish."
"Well....um...." started Sasha.
"On his farhead, between his eyes, 1 1/3 inch down from the top of his head. That's the only spot on my Sasha that isn't ticklish." said Mom. She knew her Sasha very well.
"Good" said Master Wiggins, reaching into his big black bag of goodies. "Very good."
"But..." started Sasha, but then he had to dive out of the way. Master Wiggins began unloading his bag. He threw the strangest assortment of things out of the small bag. Out if it he threw a bowling ball, three socks of different colors, a full table lamp with a pretty zebra lamp shade, and the bumper from a 72 Ford Mercury. Finally he yelled, "Aha."
Master Wiggins was very found of yelling things like that.
He stood up with a large pair of tongs, the kind Dad uses when he burns the Bar-B-Cue. Gently, ever so gently, he picked up the Gallumpus. With a great effort he yanked it off of Dad's funny bone, and then very carefully, he lowered it onto Sasha's forehead.
He set it down on a spot right between his eyes, 1 and 1/3 inches below the top of his head.
And the Gallumpus began to tickle. It spun and swooshed and feathered and prodded. It seemed to get quite mad, spinning and swishing, tickling and basically Gallumpussing as best it could.
And Sasha just stood there. He didn't even smile.
Mom and Dad and Master Wiggins stood back and watched.
All day it tickled, and all night. Sasha went to dinner, then took a bath, then dressed in his favorite PJs. He slept soundly, despite the gallumpus trying so hard to tickle his head.
When Sasha woke up in the moring the poor gallumpus, exhausted and starving, fell onto his pillow.
"Oh dear." said Sasha.
"Now," said Dad. "Now we can squish it and throw it away." He picked up a big fly swatter and started for it.
"Yes," said Master Wiggins. "Now you can get rid of the poor thing. Its quite harmless until it hears any laughter."
"No!" said Sasha. "I don't want to hurt it. I don't want to squish it or throw it away. I want to keep it."
Mom and Dad and Master Wiggins all stopped and stared. "You want to keep it?" asked Mom.
"Can I. I'll train it and feed it and teach it only to tickle me when I want to be tickled."
"Can he do that?" asked Dad?
Master Wiggins looked deeply into Sasha's eyes. "I do believe he can. But remember Sasha. This thing needs to eat every day. It needs laughter every day. Not fake things. No 'he he' or forced giggling. Every day you or someone will have to laugh. Can you do that."
Sasha looked down at the strange creature, the Gallumpus, his new friend. "I need to laugh for my friend every day? Yes. I can do that."
And sure enough, he did.
His Gallumpus was the best fed gallumpus in history. And Sasha, who laughed every day, real laughs and true laughs, why he was healthy and happy ever after. And many years later, when Sasha became a Daddy, he introduced the Gallumpus to his children, and they to theirs, and I know this all to be true because I have it right----here.
Now, who wants to be tickled?
Posts: 1941 | Registered: Feb 2003
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