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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » On the brink of despair, round 2

   
Author Topic: On the brink of despair, round 2
Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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Where do I even begin?
This whole situation is such a tangle that I don't know how I'm gonna get myself out of it.
Remember how last month I was having issues with getting some rent money and stuff? Well...I'm going through it all over again. And I have no clue about how I'm gonna get out of this...again.

I haven't been able to find a job, although I do have a few job openings I applied for and an interview tomorrow.

UPDATE: I just had a talk with my roommates.
They want me out ideally in 3 weeks.

I am feeling really upset, lonely and I'm on the brink of despair.
I can't move back with any of my relatives because of my cat.
This isn't even a quarter of the story, and I'm just so unbalanced right now that all I can do is cry and wonder how I'm going to get myself out of this.

I'm alone.
I can't rely on my family or my friends. I can't rely on anyone. I don't know what I'm going to do, Hatrack.

In order to make this month's rent, I have to pawn a lot of my stuff so it can buy me more time to get a job.
How am I going to gather 500 dollars in less than two weeks???
I have never been in this situation before. Never as bad as this. I can't pay my credit cards, I can't pay my bills, I can't pay my rent and I have nowhere to go.

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ketchupqueen
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Can you put your cat in foster care?
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Corwin
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quote:
Originally posted by Altáriël of Dorthonion:
I can't move back with any of my relatives because of my cat.

Your priority should be yourself, not the cat. Please take care of yourself and give the cat away if it means you can stay somewhere you can afford.

quote:

I'm alone.
I can't rely on my family or my friends.

No, really, you're not alone. Sometimes we give up even the hope of getting help without asking for it first. Don't do that. You realized you need help, now go get some. Please talk to your family about finding a way out of this. We can sympathise, but there's not much else we can do for you, your family can do more.

[Group Hug]

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Altįriėl of Dorthonion
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I have talked to my family. They have no money. I can't get rid of my cat. I just can't. Whenever I feel lonely or sad, she knows. And she always lets me know it too. Sometimes, I feel like I can pull through things just because she's there and she keeps my spirits up. Sometimes, she's the only company I have.

And it's not just my cat. It's also my things. It's my bed, my desk, my computer, everything.

These are all the things I worked hard to obtain. I worked my butt off to have everything I ever had and I refuse to get rid of these things so easily.

I've spoken with a very good friend of mine and it seems that he might be able to front me the money. I'll pay him back of course, but the fact that I will be given more time to do all of that is what really matters to me.

It turns out that most of this situation is this bad because one of my roommates is a person who dwells a lot on extremes. Everything is such a big freaking deal to her.
*sigh*

I've had a long talk with my other roommate, who tends to be more levelheaded and I had the most issues with.

Things actually got a whole lot better but there is still a whole lot more I have to do.

I'm starting to cool off and see a way out of this but it's going to require more than just effort to get me out of this one.

It's awfully late and I should be in bed by now, but I will post more details on the situation tomorrow, ok? I have a job interview so wish me luck!

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Corwin
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Good luck, and go get some sleep Alty!
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TomDavidson
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quote:
Everything is such a big freaking deal to her.
In fairness to your roommates, not being able to make your rent is a big freaking deal. That said, unless they've got someone to replace you, I don't see how kicking you out will help their situation.
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Blayne Bradley
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too bad you didn't live near me, my rent is only 250, with you would be down to 160, 4 1/2 too so lots of room and I love cats.
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TomDavidson
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Blayne, you a playa.
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Kwea
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lol
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Blayne Bradley
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wha. what. What! No! I didn't mean it that way! Was trying to be nice and comforting! [Blushing]
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Corwin
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Exactly... [Wink]
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Mucus
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quote:
Originally posted by TomDavidson:
quote:
Everything is such a big freaking deal to her.
In fairness to your roommates, not being able to make your rent is a big freaking deal. That said, unless they've got someone to replace you, I don't see how kicking you out will help their situation.
Thats actually a good point to bring up to the roommates. Things may be different from university town to university town, but at least here (here being Waterloo) the odds of being able to find someone one month into the winter term are relatively low. Might be better to get a live body thats trying to make rent rather than nobody.

Also, depending on how your lease is setup, this is really an problem for the landlord, when or if you fail to make rent, rather than a problem for your roommates (i.e. they shouldn't feel an obligation to kick you out pre-emptively for the landlords sake). That said, if you have some form of group lease rather than individual leases, then I don't know how that works since we usually went for individual leases even when leaving with roommates.

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Orincoro
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quote:
Originally posted by Blayne Bradley:
wha. what. What! No! I didn't mean it that way! Was trying to be nice and comforting! [Blushing]

He had to hit that.
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Synesthesia
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Dang, I'm sorry you're going through all of that. I know the feeling. Last year I was nearly evicted, but they gave me a subsidy and a payment plan. I was working at Macy's for a while, but they probably let me go and I lost my bunny in October.
I really hope things get better for you. Good luck.

I also hope I get that part time library job. Args.
Maybe we could start a mafia or something.

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King of Men
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I will repeat my advice from the last thread: You are too focused on luxuries. A cat is a luxury. Your own furniture is a luxury. Living out on your own is a luxury. Cut back on these things, retrench under a roof you don't have to pay for, and come back stronger in a year. And a side note: If you weren't able to find a job in the last 30 days, what makes you think the next 30 will be any better?
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Tara
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quote:
Originally posted by King of Men:
And a side note: If you weren't able to find a job in the last 30 days, what makes you think the next 30 will be any better?

What is that supposed to suggest?
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King of Men
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That any plans made on the basis of getting a job quickly had better have a backup ready.
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Synesthesia
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It's kind of hard in this current economy.
You know it's bad when temp companies don't have assignments.
Worse is when RETAIL isn't hiring.
I know in this state you can't even reach the unemployment line.
I seriously hope something can be done.

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The Rabbit
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Altįriėl, KoM maybe lacking in tact, but unfortunately he's right. It's never pleasant to have to move down and its completely understandable to be depressed about it. But in a time of crisis, its very important to focus and prioritize. If the options are being out on the street with a cat and furniture, or giving up those things in order to have a roof over your head, the choice should be obvious.

Those may not be the only options its OK to keep looking, but you also need to start preparing for the worst because "the worst" will be even worse if you aren't prepared to face it.

For example, now is the time to start asking around and see if any friend would be willing and able to take your cat for a while until you get a job and place where you can have a cat. That may not be an option you want to consider but it sure beats living on the street or giving the cat to a shelter. You could at least visit the cat sometimes that way.

Similarly you need to start prioritizing what stuff you most want to keep, looking for a place you might be able to store some of your furniture, and stuff like that.

I know that these aren't options you want to consider. They aren't pleasant, but they are necessary. You need to plan for what you will do if you don't get a job, you can't get the rent money and your roommates won't let you stay because if it happens and you don't have a working plan, your options will be far worse.

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Samprimary
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quote:
Originally posted by TomDavidson:
quote:
Everything is such a big freaking deal to her.
In fairness to your roommates, not being able to make your rent is a big freaking deal. That said, unless they've got someone to replace you, I don't see how kicking you out will help their situation.
Usually, removing nonpayers on principle is a good idea. That said, roommates should at least try to be amenable to crisis situation plans.
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scholarette
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Have you looked into student loans? It might be too late, but at my school, we have an emergency short term loan funded by the student association.
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