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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » My co-workers say awsomely funny things!

   
Author Topic: My co-workers say awsomely funny things!
paigereader
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Crazy things I have heard in my office:
"He wants his cake and ice cream, too." you mean eat it too?
"He's like a bull in a china cabinet." you mean china shop?
"Are those bent verticals bent yet?" nope but the straight ones are.
"We are going to the lakes tonight." 1 lake (Lake Erie)or all 5 tonight?
I love that show. "So don't I." huh?
"I throwed it away." you mean threw? "sorry for not being politically correct!" or grammatically either.
"That's like six in one hand -a dozen in the other." nope, nothing like that.
"We will be in meetings all day so it will be a day of abstinence for us." yikes

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JennaDean
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quote:
"We will be in meetings all day so it will be a day of abstinence for us." yikes
Well, I certainly hope so. What kind of office do you work at anyway? [Wink]
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Noemon
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[Smile] Those are great, paigereader. I've collected a few of my own from the office I currently work in. Among my favorites:

"I'm happy as a pig in tall cotton!"
"That's the best thing since Jesus invented bread!"
"It's six of one, eight and three quarters of another."

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Shanna
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From my boss the other day: "Oh, I'm not Christian, I'm Catholic."
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Sean Monahan
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I once spoke Eistein's quote, "Reality is an illusion, albeit a persistent one," to a coworker. Her response was, "If reality were an illusion, I would have made myself look better."
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romanylass
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Funny.
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adenam
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"I want to buy a really big bag. One that, you know, I can put stuff in"
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Orincoro
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My composition professor was quietly famous for his quotability, and he was since collected on a facebook group page:

"It's like a Reeses peanut butter cup. The chocolate coating on the outside and a major second in the middle." (...) "You don't see it? Maybe you noticed it already and you're thinking that I'm really dumb. Which is something to worry about since I've been teaching you for two years."

"It's like when your friend takes a picture with their cell phone and you say, 'Whoa! That's incredible! It looks like Mars! What is this?' and your friend tells you, 'Oh. It's a sweatshirt. I took a picture of my sweatshirt."

"I 100% agree with 50% of what you're saying."

Sam: Is he a nurturing teacher?
Richard: Well, he's not as nurturing as you -
Sam: Go to hell.


"Oh look, it's a seven measure phrase... I don't care, I can write a seven measure phrase, Mozart wrote a seven measure phrase... you should listen to it... Mozart did a lot of strange things... it's a seven measure phrase, I don't care.. Why are you obsessing stop obsessing... I'm not obsessing, it's fine."

"I showed a piece to this professor and he said: 'you have an existential problem here: not all of this is shit'"

"Here's the one with all the flats, as we call it in the business."

"The A and B sections in this Beethoven...it's like twins that don't look like each other. This is the dark, tortured one. And this is the happy one. They're not alike, but they're related."


"Note my use of the technical word 'stuff'."


"The book and I disagree. We should get a divorce, but this is not Catholicism. There is no Pope of counterpoint rules."

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Vadon
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Person A: "I need a historical figure."
Person B: "You mean, like... a dead guy, right?"

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BandoCommando
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Orincoro, I want to meet your composition prof. Sounds like a riot!
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