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» Hatrack River Forum » Active Forums » Books, Films, Food and Culture » Dnd ouch

   
Author Topic: Dnd ouch
lem
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Sometimes you see something on the internet that just hurts too much, despite how funny it is. It hits too close to home.

The first time I realized this was when I read The Onion about a social worker driving a crappy car(edited). I was studying psychology and my social worker brother drove that car!

The next time was when I was watching Futurama and seeing Fry play space invaders drinking Orange Shasta listening to a Rush mix tape.

However, "Sam Lipste " ' The Dungeon Master '" wins the most painful and painfully funny internet experience.

quote:
“When last we met,” the Dungeon Master begins, “Olaf the thief had been caught stealing a loaf of pumpernickel from the village bakery. A halfling baker’s boy had cornered our friend with a bread knife. Ready to roll?”

“I don’t want to die this way,” Cherninsky says.
Cherninsky always dies this way—we all do—


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Kwea
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See, I don't find that funny at all. Well written, but not funny.
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Rakeesh
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I think painfully funny is a quite different category than just funny.
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Samprimary
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You reach a point where the existential angst/longing/whatever stories are all kind of variations on a theme, and some are trying to have humorous undertones, so they're funny (ha ha).
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AchillesHeel
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I read the first bit at the top of the page and it said that a paladin serves christ, so this is obviously just someone with no personal experiance mocking DnD. While I have no history of paying attention to The New Yorker this just seems like cheap and easy bullying on a group so small there will be no backlash. I was under the impression that The New Yorker had higher standards.

quote:
There are other kids, other campaigns. They have what teachers call imaginations. Some of them are in gifted.
So I dont find this funny, or well written.
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JonHecht
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The dialogue is miserable, contrived, and sounds like no human being--never mind that the lingo they use doesn't seem up on contemporary stuff.

Edit: I looked up the author. He teaches fiction at Columbia and is quite well published. What this tells me is that there is something terribly wrong with both English department and magazines that publish short fiction. Maybe it's just a bad piece he wrote or maybe I'm biased because I just finished rereading some Orwell last night and his writing is just so damned amazing, but that was embarrassing to read.

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TomDavidson
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Not to defend the writer, but the phrase "some of them are in gifted" means that some of the kids to whom he's referring are in their school's "gifted and talented" program.
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AchillesHeel
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That is apparent, what is not obvious is how this typo made it to print.
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Jake
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It's not a typo.

The piece was mind numbingly boring, I have to say. Or at least, what I read of it was. I trailed off somewhere in the middle of the third page.

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Rakeesh
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What typo? It was pretty tedious, at least to me. I didn't really care about any of the people in it, so the little oomph at the end didn't matter to me. But then, it's not really close to my childhood / HS experience, so it doesn't have that extra oomph for me.
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Dobbie
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quote:
Originally posted by Rakeesh:
What typo?

AchillesHeel seens to think that, "Some of them are in gifted," was supposed to read, "Some of them are gifted," and the "in" was added by mistake.
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Samprimary
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quote:
Originally posted by AchillesHeel:
I read the first bit at the top of the page and it said that a paladin serves christ, so this is obviously just someone with no personal experiance mocking DnD.

No. No. The kid in the story who played a paladin would always play a paladin that served/worshiped Christ, importing their real life religion to their characters in-game. This has happened quite often in real life D&D.
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Scott R
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It's fairly standard New Yorker fare. That is: mind-achingly self-absorbed, irrelevant, disconnected, and pretentious.

It's not even dark: it's olive.

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0Megabyte
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I read this about a year ago. The whole story felt kind of pointless.

It wasn't some grand coming of age thing, though the ending tried to shade it that way. Nothing interesting happened. Actually, there was no real story here, in the sense of any sort of plot. Just an unremitting sense of isolation that I find kind of boring.

I'm reminded slightly of Raymond Carver. Only slightly. His short stories tended to have something happen in them, even if that something is the protagonist choosing not to get off the train.

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Samprimary
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quote:
Originally posted by Scott R:
It's fairly standard New Yorker fare. That is: mind-achingly self-absorbed, irrelevant, disconnected, and pretentious.

It's not even dark: it's olive.

I think of them more as, like, I don't know,

LOOK, LOOK AT ALL THIS ENNUI I'M EVOKING. I AM DRILLING THE ENNUI AND SENSE OF LONGING AND DISCONNECTION INTO YOUR HEAD WITH A JACKHAMMER. IT IS NOT METAPHORICAL IT IS AN IRL LITERAL JACKHAMMER NOW

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AchillesHeel
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quote:
Originally posted by Samprimary:
quote:
Originally posted by AchillesHeel:
I read the first bit at the top of the page and it said that a paladin serves christ, so this is obviously just someone with no personal experiance mocking DnD.

No. No. The kid in the story who played a paladin would always play a paladin that served/worshiped Christ, importing their real life religion to their characters in-game. This has happened quite often in real life D&D.
Ive never personally heard of anyone doing that, importing thier humor and creativity yes but I just hadnt heard of that before.

Samp, WHY ARE YOU YELLING IN MY BRAIN?

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Samprimary
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I liked this one for some reason though.

http://www.newyorker.com/fiction/features/2009/06/29/090629fi_fiction_oconnor

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Scott R
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quote:
LOOK, LOOK AT ALL THIS ENNUI I'M EVOKING. I AM DRILLING THE ENNUI AND SENSE OF LONGING AND DISCONNECTION INTO YOUR HEAD WITH A JACKHAMMER. IT IS NOT METAPHORICAL IT IS AN IRL LITERAL JACKHAMMER NOW
I don't think I've ever agreed with you so much as right now. It kind of makes me want to hug you.

But I'm not gonna.

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Samprimary
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"But I'm not gonna." Scott said. The minutes stretched uncomfortably by. He looked out the window, into the parking lot lit by the garish colors of neon and age. He looked down at his hands and suddenly felt old. Distant memories. Was this all it would come to? Would having hugged him changed anything? He stood up and walked out of the room, not even bothering to take his shoes with him. He knew he would not be back.

*titles it "empty hatracks"*

*sells story to New Yorker*

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AchillesHeel
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I would be more likely to read The New Yorker if that were true.
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Belle
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Samprimary, you Sir, are my Hatrack hero of the day.

*golf clap*

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JanitorBlade
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The word of the week here on the Hatrack River Forums is now ennui. So let it be written, so shall it be done.
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rivka
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We have a word of the day. But since when do we have a word of the week?
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JanitorBlade
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Since it struck my fancy to declare it so?
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rivka
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How uncharacteristically whimsical.
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JanitorBlade
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Oh I have not yet begun to whim. [Smile]
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rivka
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[Angst]
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