posted
For those of you who are still unaware, there is a magazine called First Lines that publishes issues in which every story for that issue has the same first line. For the November 1st deadline, it is "The inside was dark." I've turned it into a 1500 word short story that I was hoping to get some volunteers to read. Here's the first 13 lines:
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The inside was dark. My eyes, unaccustomed to the flickering lights of the candles, registered the `darkness as complete for several minutes. Only then did I see him, lying on the bed with warm, welcoming
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Sarah tore the piece of paper from the typewriter, wadded it up into a tiny ball, and threw it towards the trash can. It landed true, but the volume of wadded up pages had just reached critical and it bounced out, taking several other false attempts with it.
“I give up,” Sarah said to the room around her. “I can’t write.”
I've been mulling over that stupid First Line first line for weeks now! How uninspiring is "The inside was dark"?
Man! If only I'd thought of it first!
I'd be happy to read it for you, BUT, like the Rewrite Challenge, I'd rather not mess with my own train of thought on the First Line challenge, so I'm going to have to pass this time.
posted
Actually, dakota, that's exactly where the inspiration for this story came from. I thought the line sucked, and did not sound remotely like anything I'd write, especially as a first sentence. It's short, choppy, and completely void of information. So...voila! A writer with writer's block. I do understand that you're reluctant to read, though. Perhaps after you've done one up yourself we can exchange drafts?
Posts: 3567 | Registered: May 2003
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At 1500, I'd guess that this should be pretty punchy. I wouldn't mind taking a look.
I do have to say that pretty much all the First Lines have struck me as exercises in seeing people try to write wearing shackles, sort of like bear-baiting or a bullfight.
posted
I'd be very happy to exchange drafts...if I ever get one written. If I don't I should know by mid October. Would you be willing to let me read through that close to deadline?
By the way, hubby and I spent last weekend with my parents and siblings and their spouses. I heard the GREATEST first line from my sister. It totally got my mind going. Get this:
"Remember the double jointed girl?"
Might make an interesting Hatrack challenge. Or, I understand First Line has a First Line contest once a year, where you submit first lines rather than stories based on the first line.
posted
Am I correct in thinking that in the excerpt above, the opening, the stuff she was writing, should be double indented? I have typically been under the impression that all letters or journal entries should be set off in this way.
Posts: 3567 | Registered: May 2003
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posted
That would seem a valid formating choice, though I don't know the actual manuscript rule on that one. Certainly what you would do with an extended quote in other types of documents.
Posts: 652 | Registered: Feb 2002
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