Here is the revised Allion first 13

The commander bellowed, "Colors out". The Color Guard unfurled the flag of the City State of Deserata, a blue field with gold sunrays emanating from the base.

Allion Ne Sailon in the fourth rank of pike men waited. Like most of the four hundred soldiers in his unit this was his first battle. He, like most tried to remember a prayer as he waited for the barbarian charge.

The commander, Anjir Voc Sand Towers watched the oncoming rabble and kept his horse to a slow walk.
He knew that this was not a battle that would ever be recorded in history books. It was a small skirmish at an unnamed knob of rocks in the desert. But unlike the last time he would win this one.

'The commander bellowed, "Colors out".'
NEVER refer to a quote, unless it is something that the character is thinking. Try

'"Colors out!" the commander bellowed.'

'...a blue field with gold sunrays emanating from the base.'

Try

'a blue field with a golden sun.'

'Allion Ne Sailon in the fourth rank of pike men waited.'

Try

''Allion Ne Sailon waited in the fourth rank of pikemen.'

'Like most of the four hundred soldiers in his unit this was his first battle.'

Place a comma in between 'unit' and 'this'.

'The commander, Anjir Voc Sand Towers...'
Is Sand Towers part of his name? If it is actually a title, try this:

'Anjir Voc, Commander of the Sand Towers,...'

'He knew that this was not a battle that would ever be recorded in history books.'

Try

'He knew this battle would never be recorded.'

'...an unnamed knob of rocks...'
That's a pretty wierd description. What, exactly, is a knob of rocks?

'But unlike the last time he would win this one.'
This is a strange fragment. Try something like, 'He would win this one, though.'

Since this is a novel, I don't necessarily need to be "hooked" the way people above are talking about it. Sometimes I like to be "drawn in" and this seems to be doing that now.

I think it's OSC's book on how to write speculative fiction that poses the question 'who cares?'. At the moment I don't, there's no emotion for me.