In the meadow of Putkam, there was a village, and in that village, there was a rock that resembled a tree or a woman, depending how one looked at it.
Legend had it that if you rubbed the surface with your hand on the day of the Pentecost the rock would bring you luck for the rest of the year. The legend also said that when the rock was rubbed smooth, an ancient being would emerge and grant a single wish to the person who released her. Their lives would become enmeshed and their mutual obligations would extend beyond death.
*
As you know, the meadow of Putkam is a verdant garden, crossed by the river Teresias that flows into the Black Sea. It was not always so. At the time of the Putkam Wars, the Farong had placed a dam far up in the mountains and the river flowed shallower every year.

EDITED FOR SPELLING

In the meadow of Putkam, there was a village, and in that village, there was a rock that resembled a tree or a woman, depending how one looked at it.
Legend had it that if you rubbed the surface with your hand on the day of the Pentecost the rock would bring you luck for the rest of the year. The legend also said that when the rock was rubbed smooth, an ancient being would emerge and grant a single wish to the person who released her.

However, at the word "person", I kind of expected one of the characters in the story to be introduced--if not the character who eventually releases the ancient being, then perhaps someone else of importance. Because of that, the transition to a description of the meadow seemed a little abrupt.

I'd like to read the rest of it. Send it on over.

That word to me denotes a specific, real-world, Jewish/Christian holiday. Yet your choice of place names, with the exception of "Black Sea" don't seem to be real-world. The mish-mash of real-world and fantasy doesn't work for me. As a reader, I want you to pick one or the other, but don't toss both into the mix unless you are going with alternative history (like the Alvin Maker series.) And if THAT is the case, establish the fact straight up to avoid confusion.

Another note: the word "damn" is a curse word. The word "dam" would be a structure that is placed as a barrier in rivers and streams.

I'm not hooked, and the above mentioned issues are why.

Also, Teresias is a variation of Theresa.

I'm never quite sure of using the pronoun "one". "...depending on how one looked at it." It always seems contrived, a way to avoid using the second person "you." As you go on to use "you" in the second paragraph, it would probably be fine in the first paragraph, as well.

I'm not a fan of "Legend had it..." Mostly because I can't figure out what the "it" represents, which means my dislike is based entirely on preference.

I think "ancient being" is a bit indecisive, even for legend. Is this "being" something like a god? or a witch? or a monster/magical creature?

I love the part about "their mutual obligations would extend beyond death."

As usual, because I seem to love commas beyond the taste of most writers, I'd add a few commas into this, for flow. i.e. "...on the day of the Pentecost, the rock would..." and "...would emerge, and grant a single wish..." etc.

It all began on Wednesday.

Works for me…as long as you don’t overdo the it-ness of “it”s.

He snapped a photo of it and showed the print around for days. Everyone admired the composition. “Italian houses are so quaint.” No one said anything about the green object hovering in the background over the garden wall until Sunday when John took the print, studied the landscape intently while he sipped beer and then said. “That isn’t real now, is it?”

“What’s the matter? You don’t believe in ghosts?”

Well, anyway, real object “it”s do need to be eventually be clarified.
Yours worked okay. Legend had [often said] that if you…. is what I take your “it” to mean.

Or whatever.

What DID bother me was the second paragraph. That paragraph ‘feels’ to me like… “oh, no, here we go off on a lecture and a boring one at that.”

Your first bit of narration had a light tone, was specific, and read delightfully. Having gotten the legend of the rock out of the way, I was ready for the story to open, not to have a history lesson. I think it may be the very lightness of the first paragraph that makes the second one seem boring and stodgy to me.

If we really need this geo-political lesson, could you perhaps begin the story and insert it a bit later? After I’ve been entranced by your eloquent prose and riveting story. Hmmm?

In the meadow of Putkam, there was a village, and in that village, there was a rock that resembled a tree or a woman, depending how one looked at it.
Legend had it that if you rubbed the surface with your hand on the day of the Summer solstice the rock would bring you luck for the rest of the year. The legend also said that when the rock was rubbed smooth, an ancient being would emerge and grant a single wish to the person who released her. Their lives would become enmeshed and their mutual obligations would extend beyond death.
*
This is the legend of the Kings of Putkam. You ask me now, why I won't go to war. I tell you now, you are not Putkam, for all Putkams know the myth. This tale should not need to be retold to anyone but children. I will tell it now to grown men.

Edited for blunder
[This message has been edited by Sara Genge (edited August 09, 2006).]

I didn't like the end of the 2nd paragraph. It didn't sound like something a legend would say -- too abstract.

I did like the rest of the legend.