Talespinner's "The Intelligent Creationist"It was my pleasure to read this amusing tale of science, politics, and deceit. Sorry I didn't get this posted last week, but my month was filled with a charity bike ride.
1 character development 2 (Pretty good, but of the five characters the two antagonists are the most interesting.)
2 plot 1 (Tension does not rise. The peak of tension is at the beginning of the story when the protagonists hatch their scheme, but it should come as the drugs wear off.)
3 satisfactory ending 2 (It was a good ending. I was glad you gave one of the better developed characters the last line.)
4 milieu 2 (The milieu was a clever cliche. The use of rapeseed allowed it to rise above a 1. But this wasn't a milieu story, so don't let that bother you.)
5 willing suspension of disbelief 3 (I liked your first 13, but actually the rest of the story was better. The first 13 seemed like unrealistic dialog while the rest of the story was smoother and much more believable.)
6 unique/never been done before 1 (The strength of this story is that it does in 2600 words what a lesser author would do it 7500. But it's very difficult to do a unique story on a hotbutton political issue.)
7 writing style 2 (Make the intro a little less contrived and this could be a 3.)
8 dialogue 2 (Dialog was okay. Molly got the best lines.)
9 action 1 (The story has very no action, but this is not an action story.)
10 understandable ("I get it") 3 (No question on clarity.)
Story overall: 2 (I believe the scope of the publication that wants this story equals the scope of the plot. That is, if the setting is a small town then a small publication will want it. If you make it a national political conflict then a national publication will want it.)