posted
So, I got a letter in the mail today. Hand addressed, my full name, with my last name and address as the return address. Postmarked from my zip code. The letter inside is typed, except for the last two lines, which are handwritten. Just seeing the handwritting, I would assume it was female. Here is the text, spelling and grammer errors included:
quote: Jan 1st, 2005
Happy New Year... Beautiful!!!
Dear Liza,
Your most likely puzzled, well, I somewhat new to this area, but you and I have spoken a couple of times in passing. I have been AAAHHH-STRUCK by your beauty! Ever since I laid eyes on you I knew I wanted you. But I a bit too shy, & hate a let down. I Don't know if you have a boyfriend or not but I would like to get to know you. I know with all the weird people around you are thinking of @#$%#$%#^%^. But I a sure you that we can meet in a very public place, out in the open, you can even bring a friend for you comfort. If you are OK with this please if you have a red or blue towel on your back door handle, I'll see it when I'm walking my dog. I'm usually walking by around 5pm, if I work late it's around 10pm.
Love You
GQ (this what my friends call me, ask around)
Oh; how does it feel to live next to a mobster, You know your neighbor is Mafia
There are many things I want to say here. I will start by assuring everyone that I keep my doors locked and am very aware when I'm driving home of if anyone I don't know is around before I get out of my truck. I don't usually lock my driver's side door while I'm in the truck, but I will be going forward.
I have no idea who this could be. My initial thought would be a friend playing a joke on me, but none of my friends are dumb enough to think this is funny. I can't think of anyone I've spoken to a couple of times in passing who lives around here. I know my neighbors a couple of doors down on either side, and across the alley. They are pretty much all married couples. I've never spoken to anyone walking their dog past the house. I especially can't think of anyone who I've talked to in passing who would have my full name... but with an address, you can get that, so since he obviously knows where I live that is certainly possible.
I will be swinging by the police station on my way to work tomorrow, to let them read it and tell me if they think I should take any further percautions. Also, I want them aware of it now before I get any more letters or notes. If they think it would be a good idea to swing through my alley around 5:00, I won't argue.
Now we get to the part that really bugs me. How could anyone be so stupid as to think this is a good approach to a woman they are interested in? "I don't want you to be worried or think I'm a weirdo but I'm watching your house?" WTF? Putting Love You in a first communication to someone? "Ever since I laid eyes on you I knew I wanted you? How can that possibly NOT be creepy?
And now I'm paranoid that it's some non-disclosed MN hatrack lurker who just read me calling his approach stupid. If so, tough.
Nate's coming by tomorrow after work, for an unrelated reason. Thursday I'm meeting my Mom, and then will call her to let her know I'm home safe. Friday I leave town, and will have various people watching my house while I'm gone. When I get back, I will continue to make sure people know where I am for awhile... I refuse to change the way I live over something like this, I can't have someone with me all the time for the rest of my life, but I'm not going to be stupid, either.
What I'm saying here is that while I know some of you will probably be worried about this, that wasn't my intent. I am not particularly worried, I am pissed. This is rude and stupid. Anyone should know that if they are too shy to approach someone sending them unsigned letters telling them to hang stuff on their back door is not an acceptable way to go about it.
Oh, and on that subject, in the unlikely event that I would have looked on this favorably... Hang a red or blue towel on my back door? Sorry, my towels are cream or purple. Should I go out an buy a blue one to be sure you get the message correctly, or will the purple be close enough? And I'm going to start asking random people "Hey, do you know who GQ is? He just sent me a really sweet letter!" And why tell me what time he's walking by? Why wouldn't I just scope him out from my window, figure out who it is, and then go out and meet him if I wanted to?
And why the bloody blazes would he tell me my neighbor is a mobster?!?!?! (One of my neighbors is a little weird, and works odd hours, so I'm pretty sure that's who he's talking about. No, I don't think he's a member of the mafia, although I suppose I could be mistaken.)
Okay, I'm done now. Thanks for listening. I'm gonna go double check the locks.
quote: I will be swinging by the police station on my way to work tomorrow, to let them read it and tell me if they think I should take any further precautions. Also, I want them aware of it now before I get any more letters or notes.
Good.
Quite bizarre. Have any exes who might want to bug you?
Posts: 32919 | Registered: Mar 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
I have a rather large number of exes. I can't think of any reason any of them would want to bug me at the moment.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
LJ-that's CREEPY! I am in agreeance with you that if someone wanted to let you know that they liked you that this is definitely not the way to go about it. Totally inappropriate behavior.
I would say that it is probably wise of you to take a few extra precautions. Letting the police know about this is probably a good thing, although my thought is that they'll probably blow it off unless something else happens with this guy. At least they'll have something on record.
posted
And from the depths of paranoia... Maybe it is someone trying to get someone else in trouble and someone B walks their dog in the evenings near your house.
Posts: 666 | Registered: Dec 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Yeah, I don't think the police will do anything other than take a statement and maybe send a patrol car by once or twice.
Trisha, that's even more paranoid than anything I came up with. The only thing that makes it unlikely (besides, you know, the fact that it's pretty unlikely) is that they specified my back door. My backyard faces an alley, and for the most part people don't walk through it. People walk their dogs on the sidewalks, at the front of the houses. Always exceptions, of course.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
That is creepy. Doesn't seem like a very intelligent guy. I mean first there's the whole letter thing that is just creepy, but a red or blue towel? Why not just any towel? I mean, if it was red for yes and blue for no or something that might make more sense... I guess.
Posts: 204 | Registered: Dec 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
You know, not to mention the multiple spelling and grammer issues in the letter, the poor sentence structure, and the general puerility. Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
That is off the creepy scale into genuinely terrifying.
Weird thought: wonder if you could have the police check your mailbox for fingerprints? I doubt they'll do it, but it is a possibility....
Posts: 13123 | Registered: Feb 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
I did something like that once, but to a girl I knew quite well, way back in High School. I was also 15-16 at the time.... A friend suggested it, as he had done that to his girlfriend before they dated. I did it it a couple of times...just a note from a secret admirer, not any of the ultra-creepy stuff....but then I heard her talking about it and how it creeped her out.
I had never thought of it like that, I thought for sure she knew it was me...but she had no clue, and it bothered her a lot.
Telling her it had been me, and that I was sorry, was one of the hardest things I have ever done, and to top it off I did it in a note too.
Let me say again...I was 15.
This is something way beyond that though, and I think going to the police is a very good idea. I doubt anything will happen to you ELJay, but it is better to be safe than sorry.
Also, I think the reason he specified a time if that he WANTS you to look and see him.
posted
It was mailed to me, Storm, so there wouldn't be any prints on the box. And I opened and handled the letter before I knew what it was, so probably ruined any prints that were on that, too.
I wouldn't call it terrifying. Slightly unsettling, perhaps. I attract odd people at times, it's something I've dealt with before. Yes, this could be the one who ends up a little beyond odd, but being scared about it isn't going to help me any.
That said, I'm not real anxious to go to bed at the moment. I think the house-settling noises are probably going to bug me more than normal.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Kwea, I have considered the possibility that he wants me to look out. It will be difficult not to do it. Luckily, I am very rarely home from work at that time. Harder not to sneak a peak at 10, but I really don't want to be caught looking, so I'll control myself.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Oh. Why did I think it had been placed in your mailbox?
Anyways, I think mailing might be even better as that kind of thing is monitored to a fare thee well these days.
Now, again, whether or not the police want to actually work to get this information, at this point, is another matter. Still, it is something that you can ask about.
Posts: 13123 | Registered: Feb 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
I don't know, the more I think about it the more I think it was a joke. It just doesn't seem thought through enough. If you actually wanted to meet him, you put the towel on your back door, right? So what does he do then, send another letter that says, "Let's meet at Starbucks at 10am on saturday, if that's ok with you hang a red or blue towel on your back door"? I know some pretty stupid people, but I don't know anyone who would do something this stupid. Posts: 204 | Registered: Dec 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Ninja, the thought had occured to me. I think it's probably someone young and/or hasn't dated much, if at all. It's not very well thought out. If I say yes and he sends me another letter with instructions on where to meet, what if I'm busy that day? Would he really expect me to go meet someone, even in a public place, even with a friend along, while having no idea who it was?
I still don't think it's a joke. If I was 15, yeah, probably. I'm 31... none of my friends are that dumb.
If it is for real, I think he thinks he's being romantic and mysterious and will capture my interest. I'm supposed to hide behind my curtains and catch a glimpse of him, realize who it is, and have been secretly attracted to him all along. He's probably written the script in his head about everything that will happen once I get that letter. I'm just worried about how he'll react when I haven't memorized my lines.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
quote: If it is for real, I think he thinks he's being romantic and mysterious and will capture my interest. I'm supposed to hide behind my curtains and catch a glimpse of him, realize who it is, and have been secretly attracted to him all along. He's probably written the script in his head about everything that will happen once I get that letter. I'm just worried about how he'll react when I haven't memorized my lines.
Exactly what I was thinking. Did he get it from some bad romantic comedy? Because it sounds like a really bad horror flick. Sending good vibes your way and hope you stay safe.
Posts: 298 | Registered: Sep 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Thanks, everyone, for your thoughts. I'm headed for bed now... will let you know how it goes with the police tomorrow.
Oh, um, Mom & Dad, sorry if you read this here. It was kinda too late to call you, and I'm certainly not going to be up early enough to catch you in the morning.
(Ralphie... I've managed to convince myself I don't need to sleep with a tire-iron next to the bed. It's not too far away, though. )
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
Yikes! That's a very strange letter. You seem to be on top of things, though, and I have nothing to add to the sound advice you've been given. Stay safe!
Posts: 3546 | Registered: Jul 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
I've had three stalkers. The first, I was 17 and had no idea who it was. It ended when I moved to another province to go to university. The second was an ex-boyfriend who I dumped because I caught him experimenting with homosexuality and then tried to kill me (the cops wouldn't take me seriously.) The third was - and I wish I were kidding on this - my mother (psychopathic *itch who I'd disowned. The cops took me seriously, but she didn't actually break any laws that would land her jail time.)
Not having a stalker is a good thing. Yup, it is. Posts: 8355 | Registered: Apr 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
(((ElJay))) I'm sorry you have to live through this. It's creepy. I hope it's just a bad joke from one of your neighbours, perhaps a very young one, but in any case you're right to go to the cops, because even if it's likely not to be serious, it still could be. This kind of things happenned to me once, but I knew about the guy. He was at the same university than me, and a teacher made random work groups of two - you got it, he put me with him. We worked together at the university two times before he started to follow me in the underground and to my home and to call me at 1 AM (I'm pretty sure it was him, even if I vener gave him my phone number - -thse things are public after all). I was living alone, and I was terrified. Eventually he stopped. And since he stopped the university too, I have been put in another group. Relief !
[ January 12, 2005, 04:26 AM: Message edited by: Anna ]
Posts: 3526 | Registered: Oct 2001
| IP: Logged |
I just saw this. I'm glad you're contacting the police. Chances are this person really is what he says he is -- shy. Also either English is his second language or he is not well educated. I'm guessing foreign because I know few males who grew up in America who would think this approach would work with an American woman.
Almost certainly young, but not necessarily. Immature.
That bit about the mafia just adds a touch of weirdness to it.
I hope the police find him and it's easily straightened out.
posted
Instead of looking out the window, do you have a video camera you could set up to tape around 5? I'm not sure whether it would make you feel better or worse to have an idea who this is.
Posts: 4625 | Registered: Jul 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
Yeah, this isn't my first stalker, either, but I knew who the other one was. That makes it slightly less weird if you at least know who might be coming at you.
Bob... I had considered the English-as-a-second language issue, and the only person I could think of is a security guard at work who has been very freindly. I don't believe he knows my full name, but he certainly could, and from there could get my address. It seems unlikely that it would be him, considering I work in St Paul and live in Minneapolis, but it's possible.
Now that I think about it, though, there is another security guard who is downright creepy. I made it very clear several years ago that I was not interested, but he's never stopped staring when I walk by, and... this is really being paranoid, I know, and I'm not blaming this possibly completely innocent person, just speculating... I forgot my work ID one day about two weeks ago. If you forget your ID you have to have someone sign you in, get a temp ID, and leave your driver's license until you get the temp ID back. The first thing I thought of as I handed my license over was "great... now this guy knows my full name and address." So if it was him I would think this is a deliberate "joke" to make me worry. *shrug* I don't know.
That's the other fun thing, now I get to start suspecting everyone.
Oh, and I don't have a video camera. I'm sure I could borrow one... but like you said, I'm not sure I want to know. Plus it would almost be worse if there was no one there.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
The tire iron's not a bad idea, and not giving in to paranoia.
I have a replica of Excalibur - not sharp but pointy, and it weighs a good 10 pounds or so - that I keep under my bed. And I don't have a stalker. It's just good sense.
Sounds like you're doing everything right, especially taking the letter to the police station. As horrible as this sounds, you need to be pretty nonchalant with them - you don't want to give off any vibe that an insensitive cop could dismiss as "neurotic female." As unjustified and horrible as that would be, it does happen, and it can affect the way you are treated.
posted
Eljay, I think I'd want to have an idea of who it was. But I guess a completely innocent guy could come by at the wrong time.
quote:I have a replica of Excalibur - not sharp but pointy
I've lost a bit of respect for you on this day, Dag. Real men don't buy replicas. You should know that the sword hanging on your wall could be used to pillage a village if you ever got bored on the weekend.
Posts: 4625 | Registered: Jul 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
As soon as I read the thread title of "weird and creepy" I somehow knew this thread was going to be about a guy (or a date). Isn't that sad..
My brain must be slow lately because when I first read what he wrote, it didn't set off any alarms with me. I was reading it as if he was just some poor shy shmuck who didn't know how to approach you (you can be intimidating, you know! ;-) ).
But yes, the more I think about it and read other people's comments, I realize this is really creepy and you are doing the right thing to report it just to have it recorded in case he becomes a stalker (or already is!).
ahhh.. the curse of being beautiful!
You're very level-headed and secure, LJ -- I know you will handle this correctly. For some reason, I'm not afraid for you because I think of you as one of those people who can take on anything.
quote:I've lost a bit of respect for you on this day, Dag. Real men don't buy replicas. You should know that the sword hanging on your wall could be used to pillage a village if you ever got bored on the weekend.
Then you can find your respect again - I didn't buy it, I was given it when I left my old company.
Decorative swords will be real, when I can afford them. But this thing is enough to handle pretty much anyone not wielding a gun, unless they're trained in martial arts of some kind.
quote: What ever you do......don't read any of Dean Koontz's books while this is going on!
They will creep you out I guarentee it!
This can't be a Dean Koontz book. ElJay doesn't have any major mother and/or body image issues.
But if her stalker is driven off by a handsome man who used to be in the Special Forces and initially refuses to talk about obviously painful events in his past, she would be well-advised to start liquidating her assets immediately, since it's a well-known fact that she and her rescuer are going to have to move to the middle of nowhere and live under assumed names while he works out a way to defeat the shadowy, semi-supernatural entity that's been stalking the both of them.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
| IP: Logged |
posted
The real problem is going to start when the police do take it seriously and it turns out it was a 17 year old down the street with a mad crush on you who then gets all pouty and “misunderstood” because you called the police.
Wanna borrow Smokey? She’ll bite him. Well, no she won’t . . . but she could lick him to death!
Posts: 9866 | Registered: Apr 2002
| IP: Logged |
quote:But if her stalker is driven off by a handsome man who used to be in the Special Forces and initially refuses to talk about obviously painful events in his past, she would be well-advised to start liquidating her assets immediately, since it's a well-known fact that she and her rescuer are going to have to move to the middle of nowhere and live under assumed names while he works out a way to defeat the shadowy, semi-supernatural entity that's been stalking the both of them.
But you'll also have a really cool pet, likely a dog, that will certainly be smarter than any other pet you've encountered. And, you'll meet perfect strangers who are willing to give you rides across dusty deserts in the middle of the night, and not report the large arsenal you're toting to the police. He may even give you his truck. So, you know, there are perks to being stalked by a shadowy, semi-supernatural entity.
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
| IP: Logged |
quote:The real problem is going to start when the police do take it seriously and it turns out it was a 17 year old down the street with a mad crush on you who then gets all pouty and “misunderstood” because you called the police.
Hopefully they know that no contact of any kind is the best thing to make him bored and go away.
Posts: 26071 | Registered: Oct 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
It's hard to be so beautiful, isn't it, Eljay? How the rest of the world envies us and longs to be like us. Sad, really.
Posts: 13123 | Registered: Feb 2002
| IP: Logged |
posted
Okay, what else did I want to respond to... Oh yeah...
Garrison Keillor, while amusing, is not a role model.
I was planning on being casual at the police station, but more 'cause I feel silly for going in than any other reason. Thanks for pointing out the "taking seriously" possibility, Dag.
I don't read horror books anyway, or see horror movies. I'm way too susceptible to that sort of thing.
zgator, a completely innocent guy who just happens to be staring at the handle of my back door? If it's for real, I'd think it wold be pretty easy to tell.
FG, thanks. I like to think I can take care of myself, and I know I'm relatively strong for my size and I keep my head pretty well in an emergency. But when it comes right down too it, I also know that pretty much any guy is going to be stronger. So I have to remember not to fight fair.
dkw, the thing is there really aren't any young males in the neighborhood. None that I know of, anyway. :shrug: Anyway, if that does end up being the case, he can be pouty all he wants as long as he doesn't egg my truck. High time he learned the consequences of his actions.
Okay, off to the police and then to work. *grumble* See y'all later.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
Storm, the problem is I'm not that flippin' good looking. I just have some sort of vibe that attracts people. Weirdos, as often as not, but still.
Posts: 7954 | Registered: Mar 2004
| IP: Logged |
posted
quids- Suddenly moving to Sri Lanka to marry a muslim you just met doesn't sound as weird.
EL- Knowing how to use some sort of self defense equipment is a good idea for any woman, single or not living alone or not. Not that I have any. But pepper spray is probably a good idea.
[ January 12, 2005, 10:26 AM: Message edited by: Trisha the Severe Hottie ]
Posts: 666 | Registered: Dec 2003
| IP: Logged |
Because I've met you, and the kind of women that wind up in Dean Koontz books all wear shapeless grey outfits to hide their perfectly-formed bodies underneath, mainly because their legal guardians spent years beating them for one reason or another and trying to convince them that men are full of sin.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
| IP: Logged |
posted
I think it's a mistake to use the plural in reference to Dean Koontz novel(s), as they're all basically the same book.
Posts: 37449 | Registered: May 1999
| IP: Logged |
posted
*grin* I was more thinking of the really annoying letters he’d send about how cruel you are to misunderstand his truly honorable affection for you.
I hope he doesn’t break in. It would be a shame to get your nice wood floors all messy by beaning him with the tire iron.
Printer-friendly view of this topic
![[Grumble]](graemlins/grumble.gif)
And I'm going to start asking random people "Hey, do you know who GQ is? He just sent me a really sweet letter!" And why tell me what time he's walking by? Why wouldn't I just scope him out from my window, figure out who it is, and then go out and meet him if I wanted to? ![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
A friend suggested it, as he had done that to his girlfriend before they dated. I did it it a couple of times...just a note from a secret admirer, not any of the ultra-creepy stuff....but then I heard her talking about it and how it creeped her out.![[Dont Know]](graemlins/dontknow.gif)
![[Wall Bash]](graemlins/wallbash.gif)
![[No No]](graemlins/nono.gif)
![[Angst]](graemlins/angst.gif)
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
![[ROFL]](graemlins/rofl.gif)
![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
Suddenly moving to Sri Lanka to marry a muslim you just met doesn't sound as weird.![[Smile]](smile.gif)
